how to overcome this sadness?
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Don't think too much unecessary issues.Originally posted by smallcloud:thanks.. i see your point.
really hope things will turn out fine.
thanks all.
Anything can come back to AA ok?
Jia you. -
Base on the written. I think everyone has a problems, and these seems familiar. Haa..Originally posted by smallcloud:got this difficulty of sharing my problems with my bf. thing is, i can't conceal my emotions properly, and he'll know that something is troubling me. he wans me to share, but sometimes i just duno how to express/ explain to him wats troubling me. it happened a few times.
until one day. same thing happen. i got problem, but duno how to talk to him. he told me that since i got problem talking to him, prolly we are not compatible for each other. since i dun wana / duno how to share things with him, we should just end the relationship (5mths+) there n then. (coz he'll be taking part time studies soon on top of full-time work,and don't wan things like that to affect him)
i felt devastated. so much for all the "i love u"s.. so much for the "i-love-you-so-much-how-can-i-give-up-on-you"s..
i'm traumatized by what happened. i tot he really loved me. but i didn't know he could just let me go like this. though we've cleared up the mess and we're still together, (me promising to share with him in future) it really breaks my heart to hear his "i love you"s or "i miss you badly"s again. coz i duno how to handle it. i really really love him and wish that the relationship can work out. but now it drives me to tears everytime i recall this incident and the possibility of him wanting to let me go so easily.
heart pain.
help.
Humh, i guess he is possesive to the core of wanna know what is in and out of your life happening. Especially when you are down.
It can be caring for him, but in another words its processive to the core. SUch ... kill relationship too...
Your characters ... Humh...
Guessing again.. You ain't those so called "dnt know how to share" its just that you need longer time period for 'ice breaking" dealing with sharing of feelings. Try to make him understand if so..
Good luck..
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Can you provide us with more details on how the break up and subsequent patch back happens..? What's the time interval like...?Originally posted by smallcloud:got this difficulty of sharing my problems with my bf. thing is, i can't conceal my emotions properly, and he'll know that something is troubling me. he wans me to share, but sometimes i just duno how to express/ explain to him wats troubling me. it happened a few times.
until one day. same thing happen. i got problem, but duno how to talk to him. he told me that since i got problem talking to him, prolly we are not compatible for each other. since i dun wana / duno how to share things with him, we should just end the relationship (5mths+) there n then. (coz he'll be taking part time studies soon on top of full-time work,and don't wan things like that to affect him)
i felt devastated. so much for all the "i love u"s.. so much for the "i-love-you-so-much-how-can-i-give-up-on-you"s..
i'm traumatized by what happened. i tot he really loved me. but i didn't know he could just let me go like this. though we've cleared up the mess and we're still together, (me promising to share with him in future) it really breaks my heart to hear his "i love you"s or "i miss you badly"s again. coz i duno how to handle it. i really really love him and wish that the relationship can work out. but now it drives me to tears everytime i recall this incident and the possibility of him wanting to let me go so easily.
heart pain.
help.
And err... Are you a Cancer...?
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hi maybe i should give you an inside of how a guy think. I am a guy too so let me explain why your bf reacted this way. He loves you deep down in his heart. How to prove it? let me show you.Originally posted by smallcloud:got this difficulty of sharing my problems with my bf. thing is, i can't conceal my emotions properly, and he'll know that something is troubling me. he wans me to share, but sometimes i just duno how to express/ explain to him wats troubling me. it happened a few times.
until one day. same thing happen. i got problem, but duno how to talk to him. he told me that since i got problem talking to him, prolly we are not compatible for each other. since i dun wana / duno how to share things with him, we should just end the relationship (5mths+) there n then. (coz he'll be taking part time studies soon on top of full-time work,and don't wan things like that to affect him)
i felt devastated. so much for all the "i love u"s.. so much for the "i-love-you-so-much-how-can-i-give-up-on-you"s..
i'm traumatized by what happened. i tot he really loved me. but i didn't know he could just let me go like this. though we've cleared up the mess and we're still together, (me promising to share with him in future) it really breaks my heart to hear his "i love you"s or "i miss you badly"s again. coz i duno how to handle it. i really really love him and wish that the relationship can work out. but now it drives me to tears everytime i recall this incident and the possibility of him wanting to let me go so easily.
heart pain.
help.
He cares for you. When he saw you are upset he wants to know why and hopes sincerely to solve your problem and make you laugh again.
As a guy who love the girl so much I know, I know his pain for not solving your problem. Imagine your friend so upset but your friend refuse to tell you what is the problem.
A guy who true loves a girl a lot will put in the effort to make her happy no matter what how busy he is. Imagine his effort he put in asking you but you keep rejecting it. Ask until so tired and he cannot do anything to make you happy. He got to work and study at the same time. Is very vexing for him.
To any girl who read this please share your problem with your bf. He loves you thats why he ask. Do not wait till the day he decided to give up asking. That is the very day when he gives up everything.
Hope that you can understand from a guys point of view. -
Devil, I think it's also important to take note of the tone he use when he ask..
imagine a guy getting very impatient and keep forcing the girl to speak.. yet the girl is already feeling so heartbroken and at a loss of words.. how do you expect her to talk?
I dun see why a r/s has to end bcos one has commitments like studies and work.. but I do agree that communication is very important. Not only in bgr, but in human relations.
It takes 2 hands to clap.. if one is determined to leave.. what can the other do? Let go.. -
thank you so much for providing the guy point of view. i understand that he cares for me. but very hard to juz wan me to change over night. i really treasure him and hope the situation doesn't cause any other conflicts to surface. heart pain leh..Originally posted by zeny:hi maybe i should give you an inside of how a guy think. I am a guy too so let me explain why your bf reacted this way. He loves you deep down in his heart. How to prove it? let me show you.
He cares for you. When he saw you are upset he wants to know why and hopes sincerely to solve your problem and make you laugh again.
As a guy who love the girl so much I know, I know his pain for not solving your problem. Imagine your friend so upset but your friend refuse to tell you what is the problem.
A guy who true loves a girl a lot will put in the effort to make her happy no matter what how busy he is. Imagine his effort he put in asking you but you keep rejecting it. Ask until so tired and he cannot do anything to make you happy. He got to work and study at the same time. Is very vexing for him.
To any girl who read this please share your problem with your bf. He loves you thats why he ask. Do not wait till the day he decided to give up asking. That is the very day when he gives up everything.
Hope that you can understand from a guys point of view. -
Yup.. That's why I'm asking about the details...Originally posted by browniebaobao:Devil, I think it's also important to take note of the tone he use when he ask..
imagine a guy getting very impatient and keep forcing the girl to speak.. yet the girl is already feeling so heartbroken and at a loss of words.. how do you expect her to talk?
I dun see why a r/s has to end bcos one has commitments like studies and work.. but I do agree that communication is very important. Not only in bgr, but in human relations.
It takes 2 hands to clap.. if one is determined to leave.. what can the other do? Let go..
In situation like such, it's sometimes not to 'imagine things' before much truth has surfaced... Like you've mentioned, it could be the guy getting very impatient and keep forcing the girl to speak... But it could also very well turns out to be a very different picture..?
I often do not encourage topic starter to be in a victim's role... Especially when the contributors start to make the person himself / herself believe it is so when in actual fact, more factors are involved... Giving a 'one hand push' for the problems to be over to the other party is not a wise choice especially when the whole picture really isn't so.... If it's a person in agony and crying out for empathy, I actually won't quite mind that... But for a party involved in a relationship.... Distorting facts probably won't help us in assessing the problems... Hence, unltimately it's difficult to help on his / her relationship....