confused about my ex......help!-im so stupid!
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It time to move on. go distract yrself with sports or something u like to do. take it as a lesson learnt
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Gal, dump him and move on.Originally posted by ozzy-gurl:i was out with friends last night at a house party when i got a sms from an ex boyfriend of mine that i havent talked to for about 3 months,because he cheated on me with a good friend of mine! i was so shocked,he was asking if he could pick me up in his car so we could go for a drive and talk.now this is a guy that i was with for 6 months,and we lived together.so i still care about him a lot even though he hurt me so much! i didnt know what to say,so i just said yes.whats the worst that could happen,we have an arguement and he drops me home?! so he picked me up,and we went to a place near an industrial power station where we always used to go to make out before we got together.i was a bit shocked that he took me there,but i kept quite.we started talking,and we sorted a lot of things out,issues that we had with each other since we broke up.that was good,it made me feel so much better than i did.but then.....he asked me for a hug,and i gave him one,cause i care about him heaps still(i used to love him with all my heart,i cared about him more than i cared about half of my own family!!!)but then he kissed me......and i didnt stop him!! it didnt end there.....but i dont regret it now......but im so confused about what to think...........i know that we could never be together again,as there is just too much pain between us,from my side.he hurt we way too much for me to ever get back with him,but i cant help caring about him,i would still do anything for him.and i know he would help me if i ever needed it.but i dont know what to do now......i dont want to let myself start to want him again,cause i know i'll just get hurt badly again.but i cant resist him,and when i was with him,that was the happiest that i've ever been!honestly......since i've broken up with him,im a completely different person than i used to be.........i miss the old me.....everyone i know misses the old me too....but i dont know what to do about it.......i though i really wanted someone else.......i do really want him,but now that my ex has come back into my life,im not so sure!i am so confused,i cant even think straight......
I believe lots of gals been thru the same situation. Cry if you wanna, but overall you still need to face the truth of his cheating. Don't let the same old wound to be rip again. Move on forget about him. The best has yet to come
Be strong my gal.
If you don't love yourself no-one will actually do so. -
Agree on these.. but it's all our guessingOriginally posted by mhcampboy:judging from it..... i think he is just horny on that day. and he need someone to ease himself... tats wad i think though. dun trust men easily.
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So did you make out with him?Originally posted by ozzy-gurl:i was out with friends last night at a house party when i got a sms from an ex boyfriend of mine that i havent talked to for about 3 months,because he cheated on me with a good friend of mine! i was so shocked,he was asking if he could pick me up in his car so we could go for a drive and talk.now this is a guy that i was with for 6 months,and we lived together.so i still care about him a lot even though he hurt me so much! i didnt know what to say,so i just said yes.whats the worst that could happen,we have an arguement and he drops me home?! so he picked me up,and we went to a place near an industrial power station where we always used to go to make out before we got together.i was a bit shocked that he took me there,but i kept quite.we started talking,and we sorted a lot of things out,issues that we had with each other since we broke up.that was good,it made me feel so much better than i did.but then.....he asked me for a hug,and i gave him one,cause i care about him heaps still(i used to love him with all my heart,i cared about him more than i cared about half of my own family!!!)but then he kissed me......and i didnt stop him!! it didnt end there.....but i dont regret it now......but im so confused about what to think...........i know that we could never be together again,as there is just too much pain between us,from my side.he hurt we way too much for me to ever get back with him,but i cant help caring about him,i would still do anything for him.and i know he would help me if i ever needed it.but i dont know what to do now......i dont want to let myself start to want him again,cause i know i'll just get hurt badly again.but i cant resist him,and when i was with him,that was the happiest that i've ever been!honestly......since i've broken up with him,im a completely different person than i used to be.........i miss the old me.....everyone i know misses the old me too....but i dont know what to do about it.......i though i really wanted someone else.......i do really want him,but now that my ex has come back into my life,im not so sure!i am so confused,i cant even think straight...... -
Pretty obvious here, lust.
Most people will tell you to follow your heart. But then love is blind, right? If you can accept his betrayal of your love, then reconcile with him in the hope of fruitful future. Otherwise, ponder about your future in this relationship and give an indepth consideration of what you want for a man. But, be prepared to suffer and struggle in terms of financial, health and emotional aspects.
If I am a woman, I want my man to respect, cherish, and love me for who I am with mutual understanding of our expectation, values and belief. Otherwise, focus on your immediate priority like your career or education.
As per my signature, "It is in the moments of decision that your future is shaped." , no one can say you make the right or wrong decision. It is entirely up to you to produce the outcome. -
Often you would need to strike a balance between the two... Females tend to fall for the former... Guys generally speaking belongs to the more 'rational' type... But being so might deprive them of some 'true experiences' of love too...?Originally posted by browniebaobao:my pt of view is.. if i follow my heart, it means i dun care wat the consequences are..wat im doing is bcos of love.
and usually wat my minds tells me to do is rational, and i should heed.
Ultimately, I think it's ok for you to follow your 'heart' so long as you're not following it blindly.... Sometimes following logics 'blindly' can be suicidal for a relationship too, because we're not as perfect a thinking machine as we often believe we are... If to interprete 'love relationship' in a completely rational method... It can prove to be a very complicated if not often errorenous process... -
Originally posted by subarugal:Agree on these.. but it's all our guessing
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hi ozzy....don't be Hopelessly Devoted To HIm, r u??
Guess mine is not the first heart broken,
my eyes are not the first to cry I'm not the first to know,
there's just no gettin' over you
Hello, I'm just a fool who's willing to sit around
and wait for you
But baby can't you see, there's nothin' else
for me to do I'm hopelessly devoted to you
But now there's nowhere to hide,
since you pushed my love aside I'm not in my head,
hopelessly devoted to you
Hopelessly devoted to you,
hopelessly devoted to you
My head is saying "fool, forget him",
my heart is saying "don't let go"
Hold on to the end, that's what I intend to do
I'm hopelessly devoted to you
But now there's nowhere to hide,
since you pushed my love aside I'm not in my head,
hopelessly devoted to you
Hopelessly devoted to you,
hopelessly devoted to you -
Whether you want to be with him again should be solely determined by how you feel rather than what you THINK he feels.
At the end of the day, it is better to be with someone that you love, than to be with someone that loves you. Despite most people thinking that being with someone that loves you is better. Of course it is best if you can love and be with someone that loves you.
Truth is, if you really love and want to be with him, all his past transgressions doesn't matter. It's a question of whether your love is greater than his wrongdoing or not. Many relationships (and marriages) can survive through such betrayals, can yours? -
Prove to him that ur strong n that U n Him will never b together again,
but of course u can always b a friend to him who will stand by him at time
....yes i agree u got to follow ur mind,in this case its much rational than follow ur heart...
Be like me,be strong n never go into r/s..
The world of racing all looks even better
SUBARU GAL _l_ U
DUN POST THE TACHOMETRE PICS MAKES ME JEALOUS N DESPERATE FOR MY CAR
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At least let me wait till i got my skyline yea gal
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hmm..Originally posted by Devil1976:Often you would need to strike a balance between the two... Females tend to fall for the former... Guys generally speaking belongs to the more 'rational' type... But being so might deprive them of some 'true experiences' of love too...?
Ultimately, I think it's ok for you to follow your 'heart' so long as you're not following it blindly.... Sometimes following logics 'blindly' can be suicidal for a relationship too, because we're not as perfect a thinking machine as we often believe we are... If to interprete 'love relationship' in a completely rational method... It can prove to be a very complicated if not often errorenous process... -
do i have to answer that?Originally posted by a_splash:hi ozzy....don't be Hopelessly Devoted To HIm, r u??
Guess mine is not the first heart broken,
my eyes are not the first to cry I'm not the first to know,
there's just no gettin' over you
Hello, I'm just a fool who's willing to sit around
and wait for you
But baby can't you see, there's nothin' else
for me to do I'm hopelessly devoted to you
But now there's nowhere to hide,
since you pushed my love aside I'm not in my head,
hopelessly devoted to you
Hopelessly devoted to you,
hopelessly devoted to you
My head is saying "fool, forget him",
my heart is saying "don't let go"
Hold on to the end, that's what I intend to do
I'm hopelessly devoted to you
But now there's nowhere to hide,
since you pushed my love aside I'm not in my head,
hopelessly devoted to you
Hopelessly devoted to you,
hopelessly devoted to you
i think i'll do what was suggested by the lovely gurly a couple of posts ago........i'll show him that i can and will always be there for him as a good friend,but i cant and wont be anything else! i just hope im strong enough to just keep it as friends! -
Sometimes, by just "hoping" is not enough or strong for you...."Doing it' is what you need.....Originally posted by ozzy-gurl:do i have to answer that?
i think i'll do what was suggested by the lovely gurly a couple of posts ago........i'll show him that i can and will always be there for him as a good friend,but i cant and wont be anything else! i just hope im strong enough to just keep it as friends!
Btw, why the need to show him what you can.........neccessary? -
he is just horny.
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see to it that he's really just a nice friend and not drive (subtle) wedges between you and your current/new bf. -
While everyone is free to fall in love or be attracted to someone, & no one has the right to meddle in your private affairs, it is also important not to lose sight of pursuing your own personal development. There are of course no rules on love & marriage, & no one has the right to restrict you in any way. It is sad to see young people getting involved in frivolous relationships, & suffering & agonizing over them when they should be fulfilled & happy.
When women act with dignity in relationships, problems can be avoided. Women should not have an easy-going, careless attitude concerning love, as this may lead to regrets & suffering.
Love should be a force that helps us expand our lives & bring out our potential with fresh vitality. This is the ideal, but all too often, people lose all objectivity when they fall in love.
The question is “Does this person inspire you to work harder, or distract you from what you have to do? Does their presence make you more determined to devote great energies to your activities, to be a better person? Do they inspire you to realize your future goals & work towards them? Or is that person your central focus, overshadowing everything else?”
If you find that you are neglecting things you should be doing, forgetting your purpose in life because of the relationship you are in, then you might be on the wrong path. A healthy relationship, is one in which two people encourage each other to reach their respective goals, while sharing each otherÂ’s hopes & dreams. A relationship should be a source of inspiration, invigoration & hope.
Rather than becoming so love-struck that you create a world in which only the two of you exist, it is much healthier to learn from those aspects of your loved one that you respect & admire, & continue to make efforts to improve & develop yourself. Antoine de Saint-Exupery, the author of The Little Prince, once wrote, “Love is not two people gazing at each other, but two people looking ahead together in the same direction.”
Happiness is not something that anyone else, not even a lover, can give you. You have to achieve it by yourself. And, the only way to do so is by maximizing your potential. If you sacrifice your own growth & talent for love, you absolutely will not find happiness.
Particularly young women who are often very vulnerable to persuasion by young men. They can sometimes act as if they are stunned & lose their ability to make calm, rational decisions. Since young women are the ones who most often get hurt, they have every right to assert their dignity & look after their own welfare.
It is precisely for this reason that is it important for young women to develop inner strength & self-respect.
It is demaning to be constantly seeking approval. If you find yourself in a relationship where you are not treated the way your heart tells you you should be, I hope you will have the courage & dignity to decide you are better off running the risk of being alone for the time being rather than enduring an unhappy relationship.
Real love is not two people clinging to each other; it can only be fostered between two strong people secure in their individuality. A shallow person will only have shallow relationships. If you want to experience real love, it is important first to develop a strong self-identity. True love is not about doing whatever the other person wants you to do, or pretending that you are something you are not. Ideal love is fostered only between two sincere, mature & independent people. -
you guys can now be sex buddies! congrats!!
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when it's time to draw lines between frends and ex, i suggest dat being realistic is the best choice. Nt using ur heart. He cheated on u! dat's his wrong. My heart goes to u since ut happened to me b4. Get a grip in life. U deserves somebody better =]
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-lift an eyebrow-
it is okay to be confused about an ex. Just make sure HE doesn't know YOU are confused. This means you remain in control and its not up to him to take advantage of the situation. Just because you were weak once with him does not mean you want to be in a relationship with him either. As much as a man can be tempted, so can a woman.
I find that a lot of girls once they were intimate with their ex tend to start thinking about 'lingering love' etc etc. Sometimes I think it is an excuse for themselves cos they don't want to face up to the fact that the intimacy occurred simply cos they too have desires.
Take some time off and look at him in the most subjective way possible - and think - do you still want to be with someone like him? Don't think of his good points but his bad points. Then if not, move on. Don't have to talk to him about what happened anymore. it's over. -
WOW!
I don't know what to say............you guys are so right!! -
haha rite or wrong....it's all up to u =]