i told u earlier le..u gt gf idun1 be ur on9 gf..!
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Originally posted by Yunhaier:
It's a real ironic to see people subjected to emotional suffering when in fact, the injury is almost as illusionary as the relationship itself.
It begins from nothing.
Proceeded from nothing.
Therefore ended up as nothing.
All this betrayal, deceits, half truth, drama and sort are almost as good as getting too personal with words seen on your monitor screen. It's like trying to conjure 'something' out of 'nothing'. I am not dismissing the fact that the internet is one tools of the modern era to make friends - but somehow it seemed to be that both of you have lionize the dramatic vibes of your cyber relationship.
The man actually persuaded the lady to have a cyber relationship with him, despite knowing that is attached. It speaks much about his hidden intention and what his relationship (in reality) meant to him. We all know that a cyber relationship is insubstantial - but his act of wanting this insubstantial relationship in the first place is a form emotional infidelity.
He puts himself in the grey area - he did not technically betray his gf in reality, but he is definitely unstable. The interesting thing is that he doesn't realise it himself.
When he moved and acted on from there, you see a clearer picture of his hidden agenda. Then, he became to understand his initial intention and trigger a conscience check.
fling=deep fling=love?
It wasn't something born out of yesterday - [b]there was already a hidden desire and motive beneath the facade of simple flirting. It is so 'Neptune coated', that this relationship seemed to exude a powerful delusional enchantment that seemed to portray both of you of as some kind of star-crossed lovers.
A woman desiring to be loved or a break through from her dull routine of life.
A man desiring the life of a player or wanted a catalysis to break his current relationship.
A relationship that is basically nothing, made to become 'something'.
I see this reinforced connection here - especially the man, who has unconsciously unfold new chapters into this story by leading himself (the protagonist of his own story) entirely to his confusion. He was neither victim of his own circumstances nor environment; it was his own freewill who wanted the taste of it.
Princess livia: break the spell. The damage is illusional - it cannot harm you. If you continue to dwell in this spell, the illusionary damage will become a reality.
Cheers [/b]
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fcuk....for the 1st time...i've the same sentiments as yours....Originally posted by 798:i think forumite has to keep in mind:
no doubt feeling can cultivate spending time tokin to each other online since in real world no one will tell friends their problems, but cyber world is totally different wif real world. the reason is in cyber world, everyone can be 7-inch conjone, double D cups, flirts, cassnova, etc. but tis does not implied that real life he/she is dat sort of person, he/she can be quiet, decent person who is faithful to his/her partner. i asked a female friend in msn before whether she flirted (cyber) online even though she love her bf, n she admitted she does dat all the time.
flirting online does not necessary mean one is unfaithful. hence i feel dat online r/s should nvr take as seriously.
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hmm...for me I wouldn't flirt online when I already have a bf. It will just make me feel guilty. Different ppl have different takes on this baOriginally posted by 798:i think forumite has to keep in mind:
no doubt feeling can cultivate spending time tokin to each other online since in real world no one will tell friends their problems, but cyber world is totally different wif real world. the reason is in cyber world, everyone can be 7-inch conjone, double D cups, flirts, cassnova, etc. but tis does not implied that real life he/she is dat sort of person, he/she can be quiet, decent person who is faithful to his/her partner. i asked a female friend in msn before whether she flirted (cyber) online even though she love her bf, n she admitted she does dat all the time.
flirting online does not necessary mean one is unfaithful. hence i feel dat online r/s should nvr take as seriously.
But I disagree that an online r/s should never be taken seriously. It depends on how committed both parties are. Cannot just generalize and said everyone also should not take it seriously because there might be a r/s in which both parties are also being real and making efforts to make it work in real life (making efforts here means they are making plans to meet, etc and not let the r/s dwell forever in the cyber realm). So depending on how committed both parties are...I would say that there are some which can be taken seriously. But of cos there are some guys who are just out to have a fling...dat's why need to see how serious both are in taking it to the next level...usually when the guy already has a gf in real life, he wouldn't be too keen in taking it to real life and the online r/s would be broken before they had any chance to meet.. -
I'd agree with that...Originally posted by coolger03:no matter how strong the feelings are... u can't fully trust the person based on online interaction...
u've got to meet that person and feel the vibes that u get from him/ her ba...
Though it doesn't mean that if you know a person offline = he wont cheat u, but at least u can tell via other means, like facial expressions, behaviour, hand signals etc etc.
Hey girl, just be strong k? Spend more time with ur other friends and it just might help even things out by making u forget the incident -
i have seen or heard many cases dat forumites gone mia or changed nicks becos of fail r/s, really finding hard to pin any hope of lookin for soulmates here.Originally posted by rainee:hmm...for me I wouldn't flirt online when I already have a bf. It will just make me feel guilty. Different ppl have different takes on this ba
But I disagree that an online r/s should never be taken seriously. It depends on how committed both parties are. Cannot just generalize and said everyone also should not take it seriously because there might be a r/s in which both parties are also being real and making efforts to make it work in real life (making efforts here means they are making plans to meet, etc and not let the r/s dwell forever in the cyber realm). So depending on how committed both parties are...I would say that there are some which can be taken seriously. But of cos there are some guys who are just out to have a fling...dat's why need to see how serious both are in taking it to the next level...usually when the guy already has a gf in real life, he wouldn't be too keen in taking it to real life and the online r/s would be broken before they had any chance to meet..
sgf is just a place to channel thoughts, views. blind dates n outings? no thanks. still prefer to stick wif real pple.
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i didnt know online r/s's a trend until i read this thread..... i have never been thru one before and will never get into one ever...coz i have no trust in people offline, not to even mention people online.
I got an ex colleague who's always acting damn mr nice guy in real life....and he spins alot of tales to make himself sound damn good... but after some interaction..me and other fellow colleagues saw through his lies..
just imagine if if he's spinnin tales to someone online... who doesn't know his real life friends and whats actually going on in his real life. when will they ever find out the truth? or issit never?
i'm not sayin everyone online are bad eggs.. but life isn't a fairy tale.. or a drama.. there are bound to lots of scums lurking out there waiting for their online baits....
anyway, lots of question marks could have been avioded if the threadstarter "attentioned" this thread to kai at her very first post instead of making such a topic heading.. at least make her situation clear to everyone so people can give her appropriate advice mah...
take care and get well soon anywayz -
hence the need to meet up in real life and confirm whether everything one said online is real or not?Originally posted by silv3rgal:i didnt know online r/s's a trend until i read this thread..... i have never been thru one before and will never get into one ever...coz i have no trust in people offline, not to even mention people online.
I got an ex colleague who's always acting damn mr nice guy in real life....and he spins alot of tales to make himself sound damn good... but after some interaction..me and other fellow colleagues saw through his lies..
just imagine if if he's spinnin tales to someone online... who doesn't know his real life friends and whats actually going on in his real life. when will they ever find out the truth? or issit never?
i'm not sayin everyone online are bad eggs.. but life isn't a fairy tale.. or a drama.. there are bound to lots of scums lurking out there waiting for their online baits....
anyway, lots of question marks could have been avioded if the threadstarter "attentioned" this thread to kai at her very first post instead of making such a topic heading.. at least make her situation clear to everyone so people can give her appropriate advice mah...
take care and get well soon anywayz -
haiz dcx korkor...i dunno wat la...haiz...now i oso stop thinkin or sayin le la...nt many ppl noe how i feel nvm lo...dun worry ba...i will continue with my life de...hiaz...cuz aft all its on9 r/s...juz 1 2 make clear 2 him tat i'm nt playing him...tat's all...Originally posted by dcx:fwah seh.....5pages.....
No time n not bothered to glance thru 5pages..tiring....
Anyway...Livia gal gal... forget it....forget about the whole thing bah....no point pursing wor...waste time, waste money, waste YOUTH....
You still young n pretty...scared no one wants you meh?
15ex-bfs le wor...alot, u noe?? So what if this jerk cum 2-timer's not for you?
Kan Kai wor....okie?
xiao mei nv cannot be so agitated n narrow-heart wor....sometimes must "da fang" abit...yea???
Btw, that kinda pattern of guys, if you want, i've tons of them....wan me to intro you some??? 
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This is a very interesting topic....
*takes chips and eats* -
it seems that everyone disagree with me that one shud take some online r/s seriously thoOriginally posted by CoolMyth:This is a very interesting topic....
*takes chips and eats* -
haiz..nt many ppl believe tis things de lo...even some thinks its my fault..thinks i'm stupid...Originally posted by rainee:it seems that everyone disagree with me that one shud take some online r/s seriously tho 
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u havent read my other replies in this thread have u?Originally posted by Princess livia:haiz..nt many ppl believe tis things de lo...even some thinks its my fault..thinks i'm stupid...
nah, dun blame yourself...it is not totally your fault for getting into this. The guy has to bear part of the blame as well.
Take this as a lesson since he already makes it clear that he already has a girlfriend offline...take some time to grieve and then move on You will find another person who is more suitable one day -
I understand the skeptism(sp?).Originally posted by rainee:it seems that everyone disagree with me that one shud take some online r/s seriously tho
Frankly speaking, I dun think it's really possible to find a true soul-mate, suiting your own tastes, sharing the same hobbies etc, online. It's harder than striking 4D, me thinks.
I'm not saying you hor, rainee. But just share my point of view lah.
If you can really meet one whom you think is suitable, then proceed with care but dun let go the opportunity cause we cannot rule out the possibility of an happy ever after ending.
If you cannot find one online, then dun be too bothered. Stay with real people instead. Or join the singles club. -
Listen to rainee jie jie's wise words. She has a lot, and I do mean, a lot of experience.Originally posted by Princess livia:haiz..nt many ppl believe tis things de lo...even some thinks its my fault..thinks i'm stupid...
She's a wise old woman now, though I must add she's still learning. -
Yea, I know it is hard. But maybe I am someone who just wants to try out everything and have no regrets than just staying away because everyone tells me it is foolish and something I should not take seriously.Originally posted by CoolMyth:I understand the skeptism(sp?).
Frankly speaking, I dun think it's really possible to find a true soul-mate, suiting your own tastes, sharing the same hobbies etc, online. It's harder than striking 4D, me thinks.
I'm not saying you hor, rainee. But just share my point of view lah.
If you can really meet one whom you think is suitable, then proceed with care but dun let go the opportunity cause we cannot rule out the possibility of an happy ever after ending.
If you cannot find one online, then dun be too bothered. Stay with real people instead. Or join the singles club.
I just dun dismiss what I have gone through as something that is not serious (even though the other party might have thought so in the end)...I treat it like I would treat a r/s I would develop with anyone offline, I will put in my feelings and efforts...so that even if it doesn't end the way I wanted it to be, I would know that I have at least tried. -
can dun make me sound like auntie or not?Originally posted by CoolMyth:Listen to rainee jie jie's wise words. She has a lot, and I do mean, a lot of experience.
She's a wise old woman now, though I must add she's still learning. 
btw, the spelling is skepticism -
Considering where you are now, it's not surprising.Originally posted by rainee:Yea, I know it is hard. But maybe I am someone who just wants to try out everything and have no regrets than just staying away because everyone tells me it is foolish and something I should not take seriously.
I just dun dismiss what I have gone through as something that is not serious (even though the other party might have thought so in the end)...I treat it like I would treat a r/s I would develop with anyone offline, I will put in my feelings and efforts...so that even if it doesn't end the way I wanted it to be, I would know that I have at least tried.
Peharps there are differences if you're comparing where the people are coming from. -
So what, I'm a real life "uncle" ok?Originally posted by rainee:can dun make me sound like auntie or not?
btw, the spelling is skepticism That's another matter.
And thank you for the engrish lesson. My engrish veri laoya. -
I also had no idea that online relationships are on the uptrend. I only heard of one relationship with regards to a WoW (World of Warcraft) gaming couple. I was surprised that they have never met each other before and take each other seriously.
/boggle
In any case, I wonder if such online relationships can lead to something. Of course I have heard of many incidences that developed into something more permanent after they meet.
What do people do in online relationships besides chatting? Cybering? That's kinda boring, imo. -
haiz..i know lo...so now i dun care le la...ppl 1 say wat let them say la...and i will listen 2 rainee jie de words...Originally posted by CoolMyth:Listen to rainee jie jie's wise words. She has a lot, and I do mean, a lot of experience.
She's a wise old woman now, though I must add she's still learning. 
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hmm...wat are the differences?Originally posted by CoolMyth:Considering where you are now, it's not surprising.
Peharps there are differences if you're comparing where the people are coming from. 
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no la, i have to check at www.dictionary.com to make sure I got the correct spelling oso for dat wordOriginally posted by CoolMyth:So what, I'm a real life "uncle" ok? That's another matter.
And thank you for the engrish lesson. My engrish veri laoya. -
Normally, I presume that everyone's physically here in Singapore. But you're a special case. After all, you're an example of a lonely student in a foreign land. Not surprised that you have that point of view.Originally posted by rainee:hmm...wat are the differences? Or peharps it's even a difference between Singaporean/Malaysians?
My 0.02 cents. -
erm...I dun think it is boringOriginally posted by pwnz0r:I also had no idea that online relationships are on the uptrend. I only heard of one relationship with regards to a WoW (World of Warcraft) gaming couple. I was surprised that they have never met each other before and take each other seriously.
/boggle
In any case, I wonder if such online relationships can lead to something. Of course I have heard of many incidences that developed into something more permanent after they meet.
What do people do in online relationships besides chatting? Cybering? That's kinda boring, imo. But of course it would be better if you can be physically around each other, cos you would be able to do so many more things with your partner.
I have heard of some which have led to a serious r/s, some ending in marriages even...but of cos that depends on how serious both parties are and how committed they are into making this r/s work. Though sometimes I do wish friends and family members can be more supportive and not keep giving negative comments when we tell them that we are someone we met online...
For me, I think the wait until the day you finally meet each other...that's what keeps the r/s alive -
Are you suggesting that I get into an online r/s just because I am a "lonely student in a foreign land" or even because I am a Malaysian?Originally posted by CoolMyth:Normally, I presume that everyone's physically here in Singapore. But you're a special case. After all, you're an example of a lonely student in a foreign land. Not surprised that you have that point of view. Or peharps it's even a difference between Singaporean/Malaysians?
My 0.02 cents.