When you marry, you marry the whole family?
-
M&E are some times not successful
Sometimes cripple the company more
Sometimes things spin off to a different direction
Sometimes the synergy created will be good
Sometimes the mesh is ok or awkward.
It depends on the 2 parties and how they mesh and what compromises both make. Be realistic.
If you think about it. You don't like other people's family. You think they like you or your BF like yours? It goes both ways. -
Ya sometimes tend to be failure. Profit company buy over loss company, one party gain and the other party makes a loss.
-
NICE.Originally posted by mistyblue:There are 2 different camps.
I tend to think yes, you marry the family. Cause your husband came from that place and he brings the many practices from that family into your new family. His family would also inrtude into your family life, like it or not. You as a daughter-in-law have to also visit them and become a part of their extended family even if you detest them. I can only say that if there is strong dislike, then you have to think carefully about the future. If you like your husband so much, you can learn to accept his family and try to remain friendly with them. The expectation is just that you play your role as a daughter-in-law, you are not expected to become chummy with everyone. If you have to live with them, then it is good to learn their habits and be prepared. Tolerance, patience and sometimes acting deaf goes a long way. If there is anything you cannot stand, then take advance action to ensure it does not happen or avoid it from occuring too often.
The other camp is that you marry the man, not his family. Hence, the family you start with him is separate from his family. It depends on how close your guy is with his family. If his is not close, he usually don't feel so much guilt. If your guy is very close to his family, then there will be some difficulty. However, sometimes you would still need the support of the extended family especially during issues unless they are also equally cold and do not care a bit. Then you are totally on your own. Usually, people idealise couple-dom. Just as people also see people who live alone have absolute freedom. Everything comes with a price.
I guess I cannot tell you what to do and which to choose. I can only provide you the different views. -
Well, for me before I marry a guy, I have to like his family or at least find his family bearable
See the thing about me is that I may be patient and tolerant but once I reach my snapping point, all hell breaks loose and things tend to turn really ugly and nasty, so to prevent any ugly situations, I always make sure I like his family first.
I guess in a way, subconciously I tend to choose guys who are not close to their families just to be on the safe side
Anyway he avoids all of his family functions like a plague so I don't have to worry about that. He will tell me off if I encourage him to go -
"Ai Wu Ji Wu" is very true. I can connect with your pain. But I guess it's much easier when you are the one who finds them unbearable and not vice versa. Makes everything easier to control.
(",)