argh!!!! so irritating!!!!
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I'm juz so freaking frustrated now....... what's the big deal with a 20 yr old girl going out during weekends?? i seriously don't understand how my parents r thinking. everytime i wanna tell them that i wanna go out, i have 2 keep my fingers crossed, coz i nv know what their response will be. n it's not as if i go out at night n go clubbing n don't go home till the next day or what. i've nv even stayed overnight at chalets or friends' place... i don't drink, i don't smoke. i'm the sort of typical boring guai girl. but y r my parents acting this way? i seriously don't understand. tney don't allow me 2 have a bf, but they kinda like the guy i'm dating right now. their reasoning: i might meet better guys when i go uni... yea right. all these kinda stuff, i attribute it 2 fate. argh!! it's not as if i'm a 15 yr old or what.. this is so irritating.. they're treating me like a kid!! at 1st i was wondering whether i shld stay at the hostel, now i dont' have 2 consider. i WILL stay.. at least it will give me more freedom. i'm so suffocated!!! n my mum has been irritating recently. i dunno y, but she keeps saying that i said certain things, when i DIDN'T!!!!!
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sigh, you're not alone.
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ur parents still very protective of u ma... u r their precious... some need to hv a sit down session properly wif ur parents to let them know u hv grow up n need to be able to fend for ur self and also be responsible for ur ownself(tat includes paying ur own bills)... if u can do all tis then tell them n claim ur responsibility... if wan them to trust u, let them hv the assurance by displaying actions...Originally posted by i_heart_icecream:I'm juz so freaking frustrated now....... what's the big deal with a 20 yr old girl going out during weekends?? i seriously don't understand how my parents r thinking. everytime i wanna tell them that i wanna go out, i have 2 keep my fingers crossed, coz i nv know what their response will be. n it's not as if i go out at night n go clubbing n don't go home till the next day or what. i've nv even stayed overnight at chalets or friends' place... i don't drink, i don't smoke. i'm the sort of typical boring guai girl. but y r my parents acting this way? i seriously don't understand. tney don't allow me 2 have a bf, but they kinda like the guy i'm dating right now. their reasoning: i might meet better guys when i go uni... yea right. all these kinda stuff, i attribute it 2 fate. argh!! it's not as if i'm a 15 yr old or what.. this is so irritating.. they're treating me like a kid!! at 1st i was wondering whether i shld stay at the hostel, now i dont' have 2 consider. i WILL stay.. at least it will give me more freedom. i'm so suffocated!!! n my mum has been irritating recently. i dunno y, but she keeps saying that i said certain things, when i DIDN'T!!!!! -
Built up their trust on you, soon, you will be able to earn your freedom.
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Well, for some parents, they always prefer that you will always be a little girl in their hearts. Anyway, I concur with the above advice.
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Originally posted by i_heart_icecream:I'm juz so freaking frustrated now....... what's the big deal with a 20 yr old girl going out during weekends?? i seriously don't understand how my parents r thinking. everytime i wanna tell them that i wanna go out, i have 2 keep my fingers crossed, coz i nv know what their response will be. n it's not as if i go out at night n go clubbing n don't go home till the next day or what. i've nv even stayed overnight at chalets or friends' place... i don't drink, i don't smoke. i'm the sort of typical boring guai girl. but y r my parents acting this way? i seriously don't understand. tney don't allow me 2 have a bf, but they kinda like the guy i'm dating right now. their reasoning: i might meet better guys when i go uni... yea right. all these kinda stuff, i attribute it 2 fate. argh!! it's not as if i'm a 15 yr old or what.. this is so irritating.. they're treating me like a kid!! at 1st i was wondering whether i shld stay at the hostel, now i dont' have 2 consider. i WILL stay.. at least it will give me more freedom. i'm so suffocated!!! n my mum has been irritating recently. i dunno y, but she keeps saying that i said certain things, when i DIDN'T!!!!!
You are always a little girl in your parent's view.
Cheers -
You should watch 'Finding Nemo'
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Sad to see my cousin went to the other extreme to gain freedom.Originally posted by Yunhaier: You are always a little girl in your parent's view.
Cheers
Now she can do whatever she wants, at the expense of her parents.
Cheers -
very protective parents, unlike mine. you are still young and the time will come before you even know it
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Your parents have good intentions.
They love you, that's why they care. -
on the extreme side, divorce them when you're 21
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but one day u still go to go back to them
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Originally posted by TooFree:You should watch 'Finding Nemo'
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Short and simple. I though you would post an essay.Originally posted by Yunhaier: You are always a little girl in your parent's view.
Cheers
I can understand why some parents are restrictive. No matter what they still treat us as their little son or daughter, furthermore you are a female and they are even more protective of you compared to males.
Its time you have a face to face talk with your parents. Tell them you have grown older and you are willing to venture into the outside world and learn to be more independant. You should also assure them that no matter what happens, you will still love them and respect them or more.
You can even ask them when they were that age what were they doing? If they said they were being restricted like you are, then they already know how its like to be in your shoes and you can relate your current situation to them.
Have a good talk with them and come to a concensus. If they are still adamant about limiting you movements, then be more patient and communicate with them more. Gain their trust and they will have no worries letting you go out on your own. Besides you have one more year till twenty-one......
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you sound like someone i know...Originally posted by i_heart_icecream:I'm juz so freaking frustrated now....... what's the big deal with a 20 yr old girl going out during weekends?? i seriously don't understand how my parents r thinking. everytime i wanna tell them that i wanna go out, i have 2 keep my fingers crossed, coz i nv know what their response will be. n it's not as if i go out at night n go clubbing n don't go home till the next day or what. i've nv even stayed overnight at chalets or friends' place... i don't drink, i don't smoke. i'm the sort of typical boring guai girl. but y r my parents acting this way? i seriously don't understand. tney don't allow me 2 have a bf, but they kinda like the guy i'm dating right now. their reasoning: i might meet better guys when i go uni... yea right. all these kinda stuff, i attribute it 2 fate. argh!! it's not as if i'm a 15 yr old or what.. this is so irritating.. they're treating me like a kid!! at 1st i was wondering whether i shld stay at the hostel, now i dont' have 2 consider. i WILL stay.. at least it will give me more freedom. i'm so suffocated!!! n my mum has been irritating recently. i dunno y, but she keeps saying that i said certain things, when i DIDN'T!!!!! -
What do you mean? I had strict parents too. My elder sister always got scolded when she's just home a bit later while she's with bf.Originally posted by M©+square:Sad to see my cousin went to the other extreme to gain freedom.
Now she can do whatever she wants, at the expense of her parents.
Cheers
Me? I just REBEL. I can go out and stay out without making a single phone call home to update my parents of my whereabout. Neither do I tell you when I'm not gonna be home. I just sort of 'vanished'?
Oh well.. That's just me... Forumites, you're not recommended to try this... -
u think ur problem is bad... my parents dun allow me to sleep after 11.... even when im indoors.... i mean wtf... im almost 18 and i dun even have the right to choose my own bed time??? i noe when in tired and should slp... but some times i really cant slp... its not my fault... den they keep kao bei at me to slp early... even threaten me they will cut off my internet... but i dun give a damn...
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She disappeared from home for 3wks.Originally posted by Devil1976:What do you mean? I had strict parents too. My elder sister always got scolded when she's just home a bit later while she's with bf.
Me? I just REBEL. I can go out and stay out without making a single phone call home to update my parents of my whereabout. Neither do I tell you when I'm not gonna be home. I just sort of 'vanished'?
Oh well.. That's just me... Forumites, you're not recommended to try this...
She did that in frequency throughout 1year.
When her parents were lucky, she managed to stay home for 2 months.
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Grow up boy !! And start to Be Considerate For your Parents ! Imagine you have a Girlfriend...And you worry about her so Much...What if One day She never return your Call at All ?? Wouldnt you Also be that much Worried ! Think And Grow !
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OOps !!! Sorry for that... Girl Haha... I wrote the Opposite Sex LOL !
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I did dat too. Mainly for the reason I forgot to tell them. Now I simply tell them beforehand and call them if I have any changes and they just said ok. Coz I tink they dun expect smth horrific happening to me so I tend to look after myself extra carefully every time I go out so I dun suddenly "get into accidents".Originally posted by Devil1976:What do you mean? I had strict parents too. My elder sister always got scolded when she's just home a bit later while she's with bf.
Me? I just REBEL. I can go out and stay out without making a single phone call home to update my parents of my whereabout. Neither do I tell you when I'm not gonna be home. I just sort of 'vanished'?
Oh well.. That's just me... Forumites, you're not recommended to try this...
MC Sq, I share your situation. My cousin went to her extreme too, NO communication with her parents whatsoever. I really want to help her but this takes time. -
wtf r u complaining about? my mom is much, much worse, she every time emotionally abuse me one.Originally posted by i_heart_icecream:I'm juz so freaking frustrated now....... what's the big deal with a 20 yr old girl going out during weekends?? i seriously don't understand how my parents r thinking. everytime i wanna tell them that i wanna go out, i have 2 keep my fingers crossed, coz i nv know what their response will be. n it's not as if i go out at night n go clubbing n don't go home till the next day or what. i've nv even stayed overnight at chalets or friends' place... i don't drink, i don't smoke. i'm the sort of typical boring guai girl. but y r my parents acting this way? i seriously don't understand. tney don't allow me 2 have a bf, but they kinda like the guy i'm dating right now. their reasoning: i might meet better guys when i go uni... yea right. all these kinda stuff, i attribute it 2 fate. argh!! it's not as if i'm a 15 yr old or what.. this is so irritating.. they're treating me like a kid!! at 1st i was wondering whether i shld stay at the hostel, now i dont' have 2 consider. i WILL stay.. at least it will give me more freedom. i'm so suffocated!!! n my mum has been irritating recently. i dunno y, but she keeps saying that i said certain things, when i DIDN'T!!!!! -
What parents Do is Out of care and Concern...If you werent their Daughter or Sons...Would they even Bother ? Take it in your stride la...Maybe when they see your matured enough to handle things...things might go easier on you
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Originally posted by Bontakun:
I had a friend who went to the extreme of moving to her BF's house,
I did dat too. Mainly for the reason I forgot to tell them. Now I simply tell them beforehand and call them if I have any changes and they just said ok. Coz I tink they dun expect smth horrific happening to me so I tend to look after myself extra carefully every time I go out so I dun suddenly "get into accidents".
MC Sq, I share your situation. My cousin went to her extreme too, [b]NO communication with her parents whatsoever. I really want to help her but this takes time. [/b]
I was with her bf that day, and We went to his home to do assignment,
And there she was stitting there, with a 3 luggages plus other small box's and other stuffs.
Man and it was her 1st time taking Taxi, cause she was damn rich.
btw she was sec 4 that yr. -
Woah...Originally posted by Sekundes:I had a friend who went to the extreme of moving to her BF's house,
I was with her bf that day, and We went to his home to do assignment,
And there she was stitting there, with a 3 luggages plus other small box's and other stuffs.
Man and it was her 1st time taking Taxi, cause she was damn rich.
btw she was sec 4 that yr.
Your friend may be rich in the material sense, but no child should have a BIG feud with parents. I guess its possibly teen years and probably "raging hormones" that makes her more rebellious. (At that age I too avoided my parents alot of times)
Perhaps as her friend and if you care about her, you can try to listen to her problems? If you serious think you are not helping, maybe can refer her to professionnal help? (There is NOTHING wrong with seeking pro help, people in all walks of life seek help) In the years as a teenager, problems surely will arise but it should not escalate to a level where it will create a scar in their heart.
I even once thought of disowning them, but later I realised that at my age that time its hard for them to understand my intentions as I found it hard to understand theirs. I felt like an idiot and decided I would take care of them all my life.
I cannot tell your friend what to do as everybody have different issues that requires different ways to handle, all I can do is suggest based on what I have experienced, what I have witnessed in others around me and I sincerely hope your friend will finaly know and appreciate her parents and love them more than ever.
Peace and joy be with us, always.