Angel (An NSF Story)
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y?Originally posted by pwnz0r:Thanks for the story Yunhaier, but I feel some of the dialogue in the final chapter is a little mechanical. -
These two sentences below are too mechanical and lack the fluidity associated with comfortable speech, especially within a Singaporean context.
‘Because… I had to love an Angel, who has better choices outside me… I had to evade and sacrifice myself to a greater cause…’
They may be artistic in description, used as dramatic prose, but I find them rather lacking for normal speech.
‘That’s because I understand the theory behind giving the best for the ones you love. I know I am not good enough, but what matters is your happiness – not mine. I will be as equally happy if my Angel is similarly blessed by someone else.’ -
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I think it's just fine..
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fine as in?Originally posted by LazerLordz:I think it's just fine.. -
x2...Originally posted by LazerLordz:I think it's just fine..
Aunty just wants to share a story... I don't think it's really meant to be a great literary work (erm, right, Aunty Yun?).
We've all found this to be a beautiful story... it has a realistic storyline and people can relate to it and be deeply moved by it. It's good enough!
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Originally posted by MooKu:x2...
Aunty just wants to share a story... I don't think it's really meant to be a great literary work (erm, right, Aunty Yun?).
We've all found this to be a beautiful story... it has a realistic storyline and people can relate to it and be deeply moved by it. It's good enough!
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Very nice story indeed.
Thumbs up ! -
I give out reading about 4 chapters...
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....Originally posted by caleb_chiang:I give out reading about 4 chapters...
its a nice story lei...
go read...
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ok i just finished all 14 threads
can relate to it
frm acs a long time ago too kena hospitalised cause of tekong