who will u choose?
-
If you love A more, then do our best to help him overcome his gambling addiction. It takes two to make a relationship work, if he refuse help and still continue his habit, then know that you have done your best, and it is time to move on.Originally posted by silent_lamb:but somehow the problem is that i dunno who i love more.. how do u decide who do u love more?
i mean of cos, i love A more as i have been with him for so long alr and did so much for him.. but feelings for B is strong too.
i do not want both. i know that's so selfish, but i want the want who can gif me happiness for me in future.. -
Hmm. I don't see how nice things could really be... Either side it falls?Originally posted by silent_lamb:btw, B is a divorced as he needs to ROM with the mom of his son first before they can put both their names in his son's birth cert. they will be in contact every week when the wife meets his son as the custody of his son is with B. his son is 4 years old and is quite friendly to me but i think he's too young to know who i am actually..
i alr told B that i will be 2 timing for one mth. during this one mth i will still gif A a chance. and he's ok with it, but he wants a DEFINITE answer in one month. he sadi he will not stand 2 timing after this one mth.. i hope things will really work out for me.. it's so hard to make a decision and be sure that it is the best one for me.. -
maybe you shouldn't choose either of them?
If you really love one of them, then the choice wouldn't be this hard. -
u can shoose
that will give u happiness -
i have made my choice. i will give up A. but that does not neccessarily mean i have to be with B. it is another issue alr.
wish me happiness =)) -
This is one warped up post.Originally posted by -[0]-:First, A is immature. He doesn't know how to manage his finances and he gambles. God knows how long he will take to quit that habbit if you don't teach him a lesson by leaving him.
Second, B has a son. Does he have a wife? If he does, you might be breaking up his family, even though he shows lots of interest in you. And if he can break his marriage covenant with his wife, what makes you think he'll not break the one with you in future? If he doesn't have a wife, then might want to give him more time to know you better and for you to know him better too.
Teaching a lesson to someone you love is ok. Because a girl wish for him to change, and for the relationship to be saved.
By this, teaching him a lesson by leaving him is a total form of destruction.
By leaving, he might quit gambling.
For a person to leave someone she loves. The intent is important.
Cheers -
Update us again.Originally posted by silent_lamb:i have made my choice. i will give up A. but that does not neccessarily mean i have to be with B. it is another issue alr.
wish me happiness =))
Cheers -
I wish you happiness!
Best wishes!!!
-
Ask yourself this, are u willing to become a stepmum? Do u envision that there will be quarrels with B over this? Not that I'm encouraging u to be with A(he seems to be a hopless case IMO, asking u for money to gamble), but seriously, although B may be a better choice, the fact that he is a father complicates things. Ask yourself the 2 questions above, and u will find the answer u want.Originally posted by silent_lamb:Mr A:
1. been together with him for 2 years, when he is broke, in NS, never left him in lurch before
2. been taking me for granted for these 2 years until i seriously wanted to breakup with him, seeing that he is changing in some ways. except for gambling. (can borrow money from me to gamble even when very broke)
3. in ALOT of financial problems
4. unstable income
5. o'level graduate
6. one thing for sure: his love for me will not change
then when i am being disillusioned abt mr A, Mr B appeared..
Mr B:
1. stable income with a car
2. ite grad
3. good to me too
4. 25 with a son
Note: i am looking for a future husband.
Mr B loves me alot.. i like Mr B too but of cos i love Mr A much more after been thru so much with him.. but i jus feel tired abt worrying for money, his gambling habits.. everytime i get my pay or allowance, most of it goes to him.. im not a materialistic gurl but im jus tired of being broke.. but i still can't bear to let him go.. i have given my everything into this relationship with him..
who shld i choose? i am going crazy.. -
ALL THE BEST BABE!!!!!!!!!Originally posted by silent_lamb:i have made my choice. i will give up A. but that does not neccessarily mean i have to be with B. it is another issue alr.
wish me happiness =)) -
Tell the story of A to B, If B truly likes u he will wish u the best and go give A some knock on the head to let him know he is an adult not a young kid......if A still dun change give up on him.
ur unwillingness to give up on A, maybe is because of the long relationship that is been built up over the years..so it seem reluctant to end it
i not sure about B...but the decision u made is the right one -
then u have to be firm. no matter wad promises he make now, how he beg u, dun turn back ok.Originally posted by silent_lamb:i have made my choice. i will give up A. but that does not neccessarily mean i have to be with B. it is another issue alr.
wish me happiness =))
cannot be soft-hearted.
im glad u gave A up. i can see he will bring u trouble n be a burden to u. Since he doesnt want to help himself, you shouldnt waste ur time n youth.
gd luck!! -
Love is blind.
What you may be feeling for Mr A at present, may not be the same as ten years down the road. It is excruciatingly hard to change a leopard's spot even if given time. It will only be temporary.. and you'll be very tired to have to support his and your lives as well.
If I were you, I would choose Mr B. I'm not trying to be materialistic. Just being practical and realistic.
Good luck! -
Dont choose the gambler....
Remember that.. -
I call it practicalistic.Originally posted by sweetevil:If I were you, I would choose Mr B. I'm not trying to be materialistic. Just being practical and realistic.
-
dun choose both just recover from the pain and live single and get on with life
all else u can get comfort from ppl here and b entertained in bar
and have friends here to just keep you bz with their opinions ;p -
i just returned from the hospital.. Mr A tried to kill himself.. i am going crazy liow.. and the best thing is that today is my birthday.
he has tried all ways to get me back.. cut himself, kneel and beg, buy me lots of things..
should i give him another chance? or shld i harden my heart?
i really really really dunno.. -
You ask this question youself: What WILL happen if you give him another chance? WIll you be comfortable? Can this relationship get any better? Can you be sure you or him will not be fut\rther hurt by this?Originally posted by silent_lamb:i just returned from the hospital.. Mr A tried to kill himself.. i am going crazy liow.. and the best thing is that today is my birthday.
he has tried all ways to get me back.. cut himself, kneel and beg, buy me lots of things..
should i give him another chance? or shld i harden my heart?
i really really really dunno.. -
Perhaps you are not in the mood for this, but Happy BithrdayOriginally posted by silent_lamb:i just returned from the hospital.. Mr A tried to kill himself.. i am going crazy liow.. and the best thing is that today is my birthday.
he has tried all ways to get me back.. cut himself, kneel and beg, buy me lots of things..
should i give him another chance? or shld i harden my heart?
i really really really dunno..
-
Harden your heart towards A. I have no sympathy for people who throw their lives away in such a way, or act the 'kohlian kohlian' type to get girls back.
Sometimes, we have to be cruel. -
No way, u shld not give him anymore chance.. By taking his own life away onie show how naive he is.. He has to know the way to bring u back to him is to wake his B.L.O.O.D.Y idea up.. Prove himself is a better man dan Mr B..Originally posted by silent_lamb:i just returned from the hospital.. Mr A tried to kill himself.. i am going crazy liow.. and the best thing is that today is my birthday.
he has tried all ways to get me back.. cut himself, kneel and beg, buy me lots of things..
should i give him another chance? or shld i harden my heart?
i really really really dunno.. -
Go easy on Mr A i say. We do not know what was going through his mind when he attempted suicide. Maybe he was so desperate, lost, and hopeless? If we had not been through that state, we will never know how it felt like.Originally posted by Maurince:No way, u shld not give him anymore chance.. By taking his own life away onie show how naive he is.. He has to know the way to bring u back to him is to wake his B.L.O.O.D.Y idea up.. Prove himself is a better man dan Mr B..
I do not think that TS should go back to him juz for sympathy though. -
thanks a million. i need it so much. i celebrated my bdae alone. felt so unloved and unwantedOriginally posted by alexkusu:Perhaps you are not in the mood for this, but Happy Bithrday 
-
Why alone? Where is Mr B?Originally posted by silent_lamb:thanks a million. i need it so much. i celebrated my bdae alone. felt so unloved and unwanted -
i really feel that he is so selfish. when we were in a rs, he made me went thru so much pain.. now, even after we broke up, all that he thought of was himself. he did not spare a thought for my feelings at all. now i am such a sinner, and a heartless women. the whole world is blaming me, AGAIN.
i told him, if he really wants me back, then prove to me that he can lbuck up and lead a good life, and give me happiness in future. but what he is doing now really makes me so disappointed.
he told me he did it because he loved me too much. but i feel that the person he really loves is himself. not me.