Outcast
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I'm a person whose not gifted in the art of conversation thus I've only 1 friend or so in the current stage of my life. (8 years)
I've tried to change myself by visiting a cosy kinda of pub for more than a year. I find myself being able to open up more with the guys than the ladies there. (I'm not gay, I still love conventional porn)
I just wanna know what's happening to my social life as everything seem to be out of order. Many a times while I'm alone, I've told myself that I've manage to conquer loneliness because I've conquered many things in life but nevertheless, I knew I was lying to myself.
All I want in my life is to seek a life-long companion, my other half.
I just want people to know that this is the real me, am I committing a sin by being quiet?
Why can't people out there see my other skills or feats?
I own quite a keen sense of observation, I'm loyal, I love to help my friends out ect.
Just recently, my buddy told me that I got to change my image, so I went to the hair salon where he works to get my image done for free.
I looked good, I was quite happy with the results but somethings just don't change; that's my inner self.
I felt that God has wasted his efforts on me by giving me the ability to speak.
Sometimes, before I sleep, I just felt like crying silently with a pillow on my face but always, my ex BMT OC's words would surface on my mind, "A man owns 2 very personal and precious things in his life, that is his tears and his balls. Never let any one of them get detach from your body." Hence I swallowed it back and take it like a man.
Must I be overly spontaneous or rich to look for a lady to spend my remaining time with?
Somehow, old quotes by a forumer has come back to haunt me, "However mighty a man is, without a companion, he'll feel lonely and vice versa, however independent a woman may be, without a man, she'll feel insecure."
Are common topics being the reason for my obscurity? Because I'm jolly well sure that ladies out there won't bother about my intrest which is military history.
Now, I've told you guys about myself, I would kindly appreciate comments and advice regardless of it being positive or negative ones. Thanks alot. -
em uncle
ur problem hor
is
1) u wan to find gf
2) u wish to be able to socialise and blend in
which one? -
You remind me of myself.
Away from the crowd because of uncommon interest, keeping quiet because you think their topic are just stupid. Feeling inferior because you can't seem to find the other half for yourself.
But no, the porn part does not apply.
In any case, I suggest you just be yourself. Try to expand your social circle. You've taken out the first step - the pub is a good idea. Don't worry if you seem to befriend more guys than girls. You need to improve on your social skills, and befriending other individuals help.
As for your other half, I suggest you just play it cool. When she comes, you would know. When she doesn't come, no matter how hard you try, she's still missing. -
Take up some sports or hobby and join some club or something. Sooner or later sure got friends as long as you dont kiam. Even tai qi lesson can make friends one.
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Are you picky when it comes to making friends?
What's the definition of a 'friend' to you? -
Well u are not alone. i cant seem to connect with girls while i can easily have a conversation with guys and get to know them well/.
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me too.
solution?
no ideas, sorry. -
maybe can try to get to know more friends through your friend? maybe he can help intro u to his friends.....
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go learn how to communicate n ur there... but u need to learn to open ur mouth first...Originally posted by biteme86:I'm a person whose not gifted in the art of conversation thus I've only 1 friend or so in the current stage of my life. (8 years)
I've tried to change myself by visiting a cosy kinda of pub for more than a year. I find myself being able to open up more with the guys than the ladies there. (I'm not gay, I still love conventional porn)
I just wanna know what's happening to my social life as everything seem to be out of order. Many a times while I'm alone, I've told myself that I've manage to conquer loneliness because I've conquered many things in life but nevertheless, I knew I was lying to myself.
All I want in my life is to seek a life-long companion, my other half.
I just want people to know that this is the real me, am I committing a sin by being quiet?
Why can't people out there see my other skills or feats?
I own quite a keen sense of observation, I'm loyal, I love to help my friends out ect.
Just recently, my buddy told me that I got to change my image, so I went to the hair salon where he works to get my image done for free.
I looked good, I was quite happy with the results but somethings just don't change; that's my inner self.
I felt that God has wasted his efforts on me by giving me the ability to speak.
Sometimes, before I sleep, I just felt like crying silently with a pillow on my face but always, my ex BMT OC's words would surface on my mind, "A man owns 2 very personal and precious things in his life, that is his tears and his balls. Never let any one of them get detach from your body." Hence I swallowed it back and take it like a man.
Must I be overly spontaneous or rich to look for a lady to spend my remaining time with?
Somehow, old quotes by a forumer has come back to haunt me, "However mighty a man is, without a companion, he'll feel lonely and vice versa, however independent a woman may be, without a man, she'll feel insecure."
Are common topics being the reason for my obscurity? Because I'm jolly well sure that ladies out there won't bother about my intrest which is military history.
Now, I've told you guys about myself, I would kindly appreciate comments and advice regardless of it being positive or negative ones. Thanks alot. -
Both. In order to archive 1, you need 2.Originally posted by pierre^^:em uncle
ur problem hor
is
1) u wan to find gf
2) u wish to be able to socialise and blend in
which one?
p.s: Kindly refraint from addressing me as uncle, only 20 this year.
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When I'm myself, I'm the quiet me and yes, I've taken the 1st step but I feel that I'm fighting a static war. When those bartender strikes a conversation with me, I see it as part of their jobscope. No talks on personal matters whatsoever.Originally posted by binarynwitz:You remind me of myself.
Away from the crowd because of uncommon interest, keeping quiet because you think their topic are just stupid. Feeling inferior because you can't seem to find the other half for yourself.
But no, the porn part does not apply.
In any case, I suggest you just be yourself. Try to expand your social circle. You've taken out the first step - the pub is a good idea. Don't worry if you seem to befriend more guys than girls. You need to improve on your social skills, and befriending other individuals help.
As for your other half, I suggest you just play it cool. When she comes, you would know. When she doesn't come, no matter how hard you try, she's still missing.
I'm not worried about befriending more males than females. I'm only afraid the ladies might get the wrong idea of me as I tend to click well with dudes.
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My hobbies are quite monotonous actually and I include reading military history, poetry, photography, collecting liquors whiskeys And cognacs. More of like a 1 person thing.Originally posted by mase101:Take up some sports or hobby and join some club or something. Sooner or later sure got friends as long as you dont kiam. Even tai qi lesson can make friends one.
Talking about kiam. If people don't kiam me, I'm already very delighted liao. It's just that I don't really talk much hence I look quite offensive. -
I'm not picky. All I asked for in a friend is loyalty, meaning never to sell me out, basic manners and must have a sense of compromise and respect towards each other, that's all I ask for. If there's anything in common between us would be an added bonus. Too much?Originally posted by MooKu:Are you picky when it comes to making friends?
What's the definition of a 'friend' to you? -
Looks like we have sometin in common already.Originally posted by NewAge:Well u are not alone. i cant seem to connect with girls while i can easily have a conversation with guys and get to know them well/.
On a side note and just a friendly reminder to those who share the same fate like us. Never indulge in self-pity, it does nothing to improve the matter. -
Hahaha, don't be sorry dude. I'm thinking of a solution as we speak. Once I've formulated a way, I'll let you guys know 1st hand. Promise.Originally posted by Ito_^:me too.
solution?
no ideas, sorry.
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Thanks for your concern. I've thought of that and discussed it with my friend once but oh well, he's always busy with either work or his girlfriend. Haha.Originally posted by The man who was death:maybe can try to get to know more friends through your friend? maybe he can help intro u to his friends.....
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I understand what you're driving at but what's the use of opening your mouth when you have none other subjects in your mind to project it? I wanna learn but are you willing to teach me? I'm willing to pay a fee for that.Originally posted by BrUtUs:go learn how to communicate n ur there... but u need to learn to open ur mouth first... -
WElcome to sgforums Aunt Agony. Enjoy your stay and enjoy the company.
We do have outings every now and then.
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May I kindly know where do you guys post those outing events?Originally posted by M©+square:WElcome to sgforums Aunt Agony. Enjoy your stay and enjoy the company.
We do have outings every now and then. -
Just try to be yourself
After so long,it is a second nature and try to get more friends for outings
Good luck -
try winning my situation...it is so much worst...
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lol, i can be your friend!
I share the same problem with you too. But im slightly better because i have more than 1 friends and know how to open up when needed to. Also, i can communicate better over electronic devices.
So maybe. nxt time when got friend don talk face to face, use msn. like tt if dono what to say quickly go google search for iq questions and ask tt fella. and remember to add in lol and haha. -
well i guess every1 feels the same at some pt of time in their lives . U may feel lonely n frens surrounding u r limited . So what if u hav lots of frens who r jus simply frens who come n go . Can u imagine u put in effort , time to try to maintain the frenship as time goes after u grad from sch n onli to find out the other party simply don care as well as u do ? I mean in life , there r alot ppl come n go , true frenship is something which comes hard n rare . So far in my own life i had alot of disappointment of frens who simply came n disappeared .
Mayb coming to forum is the 1st place u can open urself . Being invisible n talking behind a computer has its tranquil effect . Mayb u can join online games to widen ur social circles as well as to find another hobby ? -
em uncle u got read properly anotOriginally posted by TYING:lol, i can be your friend!
I share the same problem with you too. But im slightly better because i have more than 1 friends and know how to open up when needed to. Also, i can communicate better over electronic devices.
So maybe. nxt time when got friend don talk face to face, use msn. like tt if dono what to say quickly go google search for iq questions and ask tt fella. and remember to add in lol and haha.
He DUN WAN GUY FREN
HE WAN GF
doko -
AA outing?Originally posted by M©+square:WElcome to sgforums Aunt Agony. Enjoy your stay and enjoy the company.
We do have outings every now and then. 
Cheers