My dad got affairs.
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nowadays guys like to have affairs outside hor, really sad... they are so selfish and never spare a thought about the effects of their selfish actions on others. I always believe in one thing, what goes around, comes around, one day when they are older and children and everyone else abandons them, then at that very moment, lying in the hospital bed alone reflecting back upon their mistakes, that's their punishment.
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try to talk to ur dad. But dont acct as if u know everything in the world. Because afterall, he will use the reason that he is ur dad and he knows more.
try ur best. Somethings cant work out den too bad.
If u really exhaust all ur efforts already, den make sure the best is done.
by telling him to f off.
show him the new paper malay old man as example.. next time old liao die. -
Interesting how most here felt that the child should speak to father.
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but sometimes the dad wont listen. Because of ego.Originally posted by M©+square:Interesting how most here felt that the child should speak to father.
Another way is to go seek help from organisations?
But i doubt the family will agree. -
So many of our dad's have affairs outside and we all don't know.
If ur dad is still good to your mum and still loves her, be more forgiving.
Most guys stray at least once by the time they are 50. Show me one who hasn't. -
My dad....Originally posted by Rock^Star:So many of our dad's have affairs outside and we all don't know.
If ur dad is still good to your mum and still loves her, be more forgiving.
Most guys stray at least once by the time they are 50. Show me one who hasn't.
And that's one. You may reserve the rest of the comments to yourself. -
i think its strange... to suggest that... Anyways, I believe this is something beyond the scope. The primary focus is the TS. How is the TS putting up....Originally posted by M©+square:Interesting how most here felt that the child should speak to father. -
You're so lucky, a good family background forms part of the foundation for success and happiness.Originally posted by M©+square:My dad....
And that's one. You may reserve the rest of the comments to yourself. -
When I say one, I mean it literally.Originally posted by M©+square:My dad....
And that's one. You may reserve the rest of the comments to yourself.
Good for ur dad that he has remained faithful. -
I didn't have a good family bkground as well? My dad went missing when i was 5 till 12.Originally posted by DailyFreeGames.com:You're so lucky, a good family background forms part of the foundation for success and happiness.
And my mother had a hard time raising up my sis and i.
And when he came back, he'll go missing every now and then, until recently.
Up till now, my sis couldn't have a proper conversation with my dad.
There was once(when i was much younger) she told my father not to attend her ROM and she will not allow his presence.
Yea, so much for good family background. I have my own fair share of experiences at home. And the missing part is not about women. -
wa... from work will be quite hard to solve cos they might develop till too deep... now give ur dad family love so he will ownself break off... no one can force them apart... only can hope ur dad turn around...Originally posted by purple-ice:Me 22 this year.. My parents married for approx 25 yrs le... he used to be veri caring to us until recently the whole family go genting for tours (i din go.. study for exams).. then my mum caught them together. She has been "acting blur" for weeks le after my dad ask my mum to forgive him.
But recently my mum became very paranoid again. Talking abt want to slap the bitch n funny funny things. That bitch was a worker of my dad, they everyday meet up, go to wrk, have lunch n send that bitch home everyday. Haiz..
Now still thinking abt a way to talk to my dad. No ideas.. Seems veri awkard.
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Sorry to hear about the mess
It's up to your parents to settle it themselves.
As for me, that is a damn good reason to yank a guy's balls out , take everything he owns and throw him out to see if his slut still wants him. -
Cest la vie!
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I talk to my dad juz now le. Veri difficult conversation. He keep denying everything n juz say that b**** is juz over friendly.
But he promise nv to send her back home again n will sack her once they have found a replacement. Dunno he telling the truth ma.. Haiz..
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get her dad's dad who is her grandfather or elder brother which is her uncle to speak to him then...Originally posted by Pitot:but sometimes the dad wont listen. Because of ego.
Another way is to go seek help from organisations?
But i doubt the family will agree.
as for the thread starter, tell your dad to go one step back.. he's over doing. -
Got a similar situation like the TS. Dad got an affair too. Prior to the divorce, he come back home everyday to ask mi to pay back the $$$ for mi overseas education. My mom n dad quarrel everyday becos of this. My mom actually took the $$ from their joint a/c n used it to send to overseas for education. Now he wants it back n threaten to sue my mom for the $$$. So juz waiting for his lawyer letter loh. The funny thing is he actually wrote to the chinese newspaper n ask for advice... The moment i saw the letter i really hit the roof leh.... he has basically changed the whole story. Like the taking of the $$ is w/o his approval. Pls the ****ing old man even went to the airport to sent mi off loh. Then also wait til divorce then wanna to sue. ****king old man
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Sometimes, if the father will not listen, better that the son give him a tongue lashing, after all, he has placed the family bonds in jeopardy.
If you don't give your father a good verbal lashing, he will think he is the biggest chap around, and continue to hurt your mother. -
Originally posted by purple-ice:Me 22 this year.. My parents married for approx 25 yrs le... he used to be veri caring to us until recently the whole family go genting for tours (i din go.. study for exams).. then my mum caught them together. She has been "acting blur" for weeks le after my dad ask my mum to forgive him.
But recently my mum became very paranoid again. Talking abt want to slap the bitch n funny funny things. That bitch was a worker of my dad, they everyday meet up, go to wrk, have lunch n send that bitch home everyday. Haiz..
Now still thinking abt a way to talk to my dad. No ideas.. Seems veri awkard. 
There are many reasons why men drift after years into their marriage - I won't begin my lengthy essay on that. Instead, I would urge you give him the freedom to decide what's best for himself and for his marriage. I will explain my thoughts below.
A marriage is a spiritual walk between the husband and wife - the vow is a sacred promise made and bounded into a 'willing contract', supposedly forged from deep altruistic love. Should either one of the couple deviate from the vow or experienced the weakening of their love - intrinsically, this adversity is a challenge to be overcome by themselves.
Like a mountain to surmount, the couple got to find ways to get pass or they are likely in trouble.
Since you have spoken to your dad - we shall just leave the words said as it is. Personally, I do not believe in 'lecturing' your dad on the 'morals/ethics of a relationship' - firstly, it used to be the 'top-to-bottom' approach for your dad, 'educating' you about life and when you suddenly switched that role over, you dad is likely to resist any attempt from you to 'teach' him and probably dismiss your 'advices' into airy words.
At best, you could probably understand his situation better through communication, but ultimately, he still have to make his own decision... for better or for ill.
Secondly, regardless of how you view it - the marriage is essentially still between the two of them. Many people will disagree with me, saying that once kids are in the picture, everything else changes. But lemme tell you that although the kids are implicated, but they are not wholesome - we must always remember that having children do not eliminate the fact that your marital vow is made in the designation of a HUSBAND and WIFE - you do not make your vow in image of your children. ThatÂ’s why marriages often dulled itself into a drudgery journey because people are too preoccupied with everything else and neglected about the initial love passion that created the reason for the existence of their relationship.
Government statistics have shown that couples with children are less likely to divorce, compared to a childless couple. But this statistic says nothing about fulfillment, harmony and happiness gained through marriage. What's good of a marriage if there is an absence of love and filled nothing but discontentment and misery?
Critical elements maintain in BGR, must also maintain in marriage.
You, being the children, will one day fall in love and start your own family. You will have your own cosmic lesson to grasp and that's inherently yours... it doesn't belong to your parents... neither does your future kids have a share in it.
It's your marriage.
In the same context - it's your parent's marriage.
*** You are already a thinking adult... very much beyond your growing years, you could judge what's 'right' or 'wrong'... 'should' or 'should not'... based on a set of principles/moral value you have adopted - unlike your early childhood, where your personal developments are closely tied to parental influence.
Let your dad resolve his own complication as you stand by your mum, acting as her pillar of support.
Also, allow me to advise against inciting hatred towards your dad because of his infidelity. These are issues he has to learn to cope with in love and if he has failed to deal with them during his younger years, he will handle them now. Nobody is spared from individual love cosmic learning - it's the same for him.
Cheers -
since u confront him le then jz see how tings goes lo...Originally posted by purple-ice:I talk to my dad juz now le. Veri difficult conversation. He keep denying everything n juz say that b**** is juz over friendly.
But he promise nv to send her back home again n will sack her once they have found a replacement. Dunno he telling the truth ma.. Haiz.. -
is the 3rd party a china gal?
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My dad had an affair a few years ago too. It dragged on for quite some time, 4 years. During that time, my mom felt helpless and sunk into depression and she even attempted suicide twice. My dad would only come home once a week and being 11, I can only be there for my mother. Nothing much I could do.
Please be there for your mom and give her assurance that she still has you and your siblings(if you have any). Maybe you could talk to your father about it, why is he doing this. And is there any problems that are bothering him.
Sometimes, maybe it's the woman that doesn't wanna leave your father. That happened to my father and she even faked a suicide to get my father's attention.
Hope everything comes out well for you.
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Originally posted by purple-ice:My mum recently juz found out that my dad has an affair outside. We are all so sad now. This thing has been going on for 3 yrs le, after my dad change his job. Y he he causing us to b so stress?
Pls help. I dunno wat I can do now.Originally posted by purple-ice:Me 22 this year.. My parents married for approx 25 yrs le... he used to be veri caring to us until recently the whole family go genting for tours (i din go.. study for exams).. then my mum caught them together. She has been "acting blur" for weeks le after my dad ask my mum to forgive him.
But recently my mum became very paranoid again. Talking abt want to slap the bitch n funny funny things. That bitch was a worker of my dad, they everyday meet up, go to wrk, have lunch n send that bitch home everyday. Haiz..
Now still thinking abt a way to talk to my dad. No ideas.. Seems veri awkard. Originally posted by purple-ice:I talk to my dad juz now le. Veri difficult conversation. He keep denying everything n juz say that b**** is juz over friendly.
But he promise nv to send her back home again n will sack her once they have found a replacement. Dunno he telling the truth ma.. Haiz.. -
my exact questionOriginally posted by monoslayer:is the 3rd party a china gal? -
tell your mom tahan a while.
my dad was in this before.
and after that, they ALWAYS regret what they had done, since all of these whores go for the money. -
tink should jz keep their $$$ to ensure still got $$$ got live...Originally posted by gigabyte14:tell your mom tahan a while.
my dad was in this before.
and after that, they ALWAYS regret what they had done, since all of these whores go for the money.