stale r/s
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hey, juz wondering if you guys experience a stalemate in r/s when its becming too routine and boring after 1,2 years?
any idea(s) to spice up r/s?
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ask yourselves what you want in life and work towards it together?
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well, we know wad we want. we are woking towards tht, but on the long run till wad we wan... its rching kinda routine on our r/s..
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everything will lose their "freshness" eventually. That cute kid will soon becoming annoying. That r/s will soon become stagnant or fights will kill all feeling.
Do something togther? Learn some course together.
Are you going anywhere with this R/s?
Truth is that I almost left my bf if his mom didn't propose for him. -
propose for him?Originally posted by mistyblue:everything will lose their "freshness" eventually. That cute kid will soon becoming annoying. That r/s will soon become stagnant or fights will kill all feeling.
Do something togther? Learn some course together.
Are you going anywhere with this R/s?
Truth is that I almost left my bf if his mom didn't propose for him.
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we've been quite busi with our work lately and we onli meet when i pick heru up for work. we will then catch a movie or some late supper and send her home after tht. its kinda routine and i wanna spice things up.Originally posted by mistyblue:everything will lose their "freshness" eventually. That cute kid will soon becoming annoying. That r/s will soon become stagnant or fights will kill all feeling.
Do something togther? Learn some course together.
Are you going anywhere with this R/s?
Truth is that I almost left my bf if his mom didn't propose for him. -
yah. Hence my regret.Originally posted by blowfish:propose for him?
Boys, always propose to your girl. At least she has something to remember so sweetly.. I only have a brazzy woman who asked my while she watch TV that its a good year to get married and we should do it. She checked the calendars. I told her to ask her son first. She took it as a yes.
So after that no matter what he did. I only remember that my bossy MIL proposed. Nothing will erase that image and hence the start of my regret. -
learn to look forward and dun regret. work it out together to bring ur marriage to another level.Originally posted by mistyblue:yah. Hence my regret.
Boys, always propose to your girl. At least she has something to remember so sweetly.. I only have a brazzy woman who asked my while she watch TV that its a good year to get married and we should do it. She checked the calendars. I told her to ask her son first. She took it as a yes.
So after that no matter what he did. I only remember that my bossy MIL proposed. Nothing will erase that image and hence the start of my regret. -
haiz... but look at the bright side la. You are marrying the guy u love rite?Originally posted by mistyblue:yah. Hence my regret.
Boys, always propose to your girl. At least she has something to remember so sweetly.. I only have a brazzy woman who asked my while she watch TV that its a good year to get married and we should do it. She checked the calendars. I told her to ask her son first. She took it as a yes.
So after that no matter what he did. I only remember that my bossy MIL proposed. Nothing will erase that image and hence the start of my regret. -
'Spice' always take effort... You must remember that..Originally posted by WrX_STi:we've been quite busi with our work lately and we onli meet when i pick heru up for work. we will then catch a movie or some late supper and send her home after tht. its kinda routine and i wanna spice things up.
sometimes get her a flower. That would be a nice treat.
Sometimes just go back to the places you first started dating and go there to enjoy each other's company
Or go to different places such as farmways to see fish ponds or make trip to the zoo...
Or book a feet rub/back rub with Wan Yang for the two of you..
You have car, can explore places never been.. Such as Changi Village, MacRichie Reservoir tree top walks.
Enjoy the night time together looking at stars and etc
Its not just the activity, but doing things together can make some difference.
Make it a habit for you so you don't feel its effort. Continue to discover things together and date each other even when you guys are married. -
that's a good question. As the TS discovered.... and I said its a lot of effort. Its a bank account, if you credit it once in a while, there is still something to debit from. If all that happens to the account is debit. Then it will empty out one day. Perhaps the account is kept around for old time sake but who knows. If its not being together, its to be apart. This world has simplified things very much.Originally posted by blowfish:haiz... but look at the bright side la. You are marrying the guy u love rite? -
i have reached the next level. Its wash the toilet, mop the floor, cook and clean for the family, endless bills to pay even though I paid half of all wedding expense but my husband's debts piled up and I am now helping him pay for his half of the wedding.Originally posted by WrX_STi:learn to look forward and dun regret. work it out together to bring ur marriage to another level.
Its bleak. Its depressing. Makes me suicidal. -
yes i got it. thank u so much.Originally posted by mistyblue:'Spice' always take effort... You must remember that..
sometimes get her a flower. That would be a nice treat.
Sometimes just go back to the places you first started dating and go there to enjoy each other's company
Or go to different places such as farmways to see fish ponds or make trip to the zoo...
Or book a feet rub/back rub with Wan Yang for the two of you..
You have car, can explore places never been.. Such as Changi Village, MacRichie Reservoir tree top walks.
Enjoy the night time together looking at stars and etc
Its not just the activity, but doing things together can make some difference.
Make it a habit for you so you don't feel its effort. Continue to discover things together and date each other even when you guys are married. -
Good luck. Its natural something things take a back seat. Just don't let it become a feature of the r/s.Originally posted by WrX_STi:yes i got it. thank u so much.
Enjoy her company. Even drinking simple coffee can become special... -
i guess u ought to let r husband know abt dis. i feel its beeter to talk things out and settle it asap. if he's some1 who is not very sensity like me, perhaps u can try talking to his pals to bring some sense into him. a r/s nid both party to work out together, drop him a note or smthing to let him known of dis routine thingy so tht he can do something out of it.Originally posted by mistyblue:i have reached the next level. Its wash the toilet, mop the floor, cook and clean for the family, endless bills to pay even though I paid half of all wedding expense but my husband's debts piled up and I am now helping him pay for his half of the wedding.
Its bleak. Its depressing. Makes me suicidal.
take a break, go for a short trip to genting with ur girlfriends to gif urself a break. -
yes, i'll do jus that.Originally posted by mistyblue:Good luck. Its natural something things take a back seat. Just don't let it become a feature of the r/s.
Enjoy her company. Even drinking simple coffee can become special... -
I think he might be happier with another girl. I thought about things and I think that I have done as much to set him up with the kind of life he wanted- house, car, whatever. Its just the wrong girl he's with now. I think he should get another girl. If I die, insurance will be handsome. He will be debt free, his father can gamble to his heart content, the family can live off the money I left. So wouldn't it be nice. Perhaps, i think about it and then push myself I little harder and become a little more tired - I might just fall asleep and wake up in hell... yeah its a depressing idea but to me its a wonderful thought.Originally posted by WrX_STi:i guess u ought to let r husband know abt dis. i feel its beeter to talk things out and settle it asap. if he's some1 who is not very sensity like me, perhaps u can try talking to his pals to bring some sense into him. a r/s nid both party to work out together, drop him a note or smthing to let him known of dis routine thingy so tht he can do something out of it.
take a break, go for a short trip to genting with ur girlfriends to gif urself a break. -
to die is not a very good solution. there are so mani things in the world for u, onli for u to discover yet. im not trying to break u up or smthing, if u feel its better living alone. u might consider a divorce, tht will be much better den death. but then again, do ur ultimate best to salvage dis marriage.Originally posted by mistyblue:I think he might be happier with another girl. I thought about things and I think that I have done as much to set him up with the kind of life he wanted- house, car, whatever. Its just the wrong girl he's with now. I think he should get another girl. If I die, insurance will be handsome. He will be debt free, his father can gamble to his heart content, the family can live off the money I left. So wouldn't it be nice. Perhaps, i think about it and then push myself I little harder and become a little more tired - I might just fall asleep and wake up in hell... yeah its a depressing idea but to me its a wonderful thought.
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i don't know but anyways, its no loss either way. Its been the same to me all my life. The world will still continue onwards whether I am around or not.
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bear it in mind to cherish ur life. beisde the unhappiness with him, im sure there are alot more happiness with ur frends and love one.Originally posted by mistyblue:i don't know but anyways, its no loss either way. Its been the same to me all my life. The world will still continue onwards whether I am around or not. -
Anyways, back to your case...
Your r/s is still Ok.. just routine.. So good luck to you.. -
time to have a kid
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well, thanks.Originally posted by mistyblue:Anyways, back to your case...
Your r/s is still Ok.. just routine.. So good luck to you..
back to urs, rmb to think properly. -
kids add to the complication. They don't solve anything.
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Originally posted by mistyblue:I think he might be happier with another girl. I thought about things and I think that I have done as much to set him up with the kind of life he wanted- house, car, whatever. Its just the wrong girl he's with now. I think he should get another girl. If I die, insurance will be handsome. He will be debt free, his father can gamble to his heart content, the family can live off the money I left. So wouldn't it be nice. Perhaps, i think about it and then push myself I little harder and become a little more tired - I might just fall asleep and wake up in hell... yeah its a depressing idea but to me its a wonderful thought.
I worry for you Mistyblue.
This is an emotional time bomb that will implode any time, given a little spark.
Hope communication and mutual solution will resolve whatever issues you have with your husband, marriage and the family because certainly, you won't be able to resolve it yourself.
Avoidance or putting problems at the back of your head may backfire, especially when rationality is missing during certain critical days. Also, depression might strike and linger a great deal of time.
Be positive and stay cheerful - impossible is nothing.
Merry Xmas to you.
Cheers