why modern guys seems so insecure??
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I would gather 80% of topics here would be guys who after a breakup seems to be clinging on...
the general feel is that Modern guys are either insecure or imature to deal with relationship.
yes, mentally, gals do mature faster (in fact, 2 yrs) but it seems that modern guys fare much worse than this mental gap.
I am not generalising but on the whole, it seems that guys are lacking the social skills in knowing how to chat with a lady, how to be a gentleman, and how to end a relationship.
Yes, these are things that are not learned from books or from a soulmate but hey, if the gal can end it so professionally, surely, a guy can do that too.
Really, after reading most of the posts, guys seems most brittle when it comes to R/S. -
The most bo chup party will be able to walk away the easiest.Originally posted by iceFatboy:I would gather 80% of topics here would be guys who after a breakup seems to be clinging on...
the general feel is that Modern guys are either insecure or imature to deal with relationship.
yes, mentally, gals do mature faster (in fact, 2 yrs) but it seems that modern guys fare much worse than this mental gap.
I am not generalising but on the whole, it seems that guys are lacking the social skills in knowing how to chat with a lady, how to be a gentleman, and how to end a relationship.
Yes, these are things that are not learned from books or from a soulmate but hey, if the gal can end it so professionally, surely, a guy can do that too.
Really, after reading most of the posts, guys seems most brittle when it comes to R/S.
So maybe the guys who posted here are the ones taking that particular r/s most easily. -
those who doens't cling on are mostly playboysOriginally posted by iceFatboy:I would gather 80% of topics here would be guys who after a breakup seems to be clinging on...
the general feel is that Modern guys are either insecure or imature to deal with relationship.
yes, mentally, gals do mature faster (in fact, 2 yrs) but it seems that modern guys fare much worse than this mental gap.
I am not generalising but on the whole, it seems that guys are lacking the social skills in knowing how to chat with a lady, how to be a gentleman, and how to end a relationship.
Yes, these are things that are not learned from books or from a soulmate but hey, if the gal can end it so professionally, surely, a guy can do that too.
Really, after reading most of the posts, guys seems most brittle when it comes to R/S. -
Most gals have "girl frends" to talk to when they suffer from a breakup.Originally posted by iceFatboy:I would gather 80% of topics here would be guys who after a breakup seems to be clinging on...
the general feel is that Modern guys are either insecure or imature to deal with relationship.
yes, mentally, gals do mature faster (in fact, 2 yrs) but it seems that modern guys fare much worse than this mental gap.
I am not generalising but on the whole, it seems that guys are lacking the social skills in knowing how to chat with a lady, how to be a gentleman, and how to end a relationship.
Yes, these are things that are not learned from books or from a soulmate but hey, if the gal can end it so professionally, surely, a guy can do that too.
Really, after reading most of the posts, guys seems most brittle when it comes to R/S.
Most guys will not share sob stories with their friends... hence more guys will post such article here.. -
another thing is that..
guys always like to act tough, but deep inside they are the one who is most hurt -
Now I know I still lacking in maturity and security. Thanks for bringing this up.Originally posted by iceFatboy:I would gather 80% of topics here would be guys who after a breakup seems to be clinging on...
the general feel is that Modern guys are either insecure or imature to deal with relationship.
yes, mentally, gals do mature faster (in fact, 2 yrs) but it seems that modern guys fare much worse than this mental gap.
I am not generalising but on the whole, it seems that guys are lacking the social skills in knowing how to chat with a lady, how to be a gentleman, and how to end a relationship.
Yes, these are things that are not learned from books or from a soulmate but hey, if the gal can end it so professionally, surely, a guy can do that too.
Really, after reading most of the posts, guys seems most brittle when it comes to R/S.
No its not a mockery, I am reassessing myself after these few years and I do agree on most part that I have matured more but I am still growing and still quite far away from being a GOOD person. -
so you think you're so tough.
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Modern guys look insecure...but who to blame? Cuz of the gals lor..make us feel that way..haha no la..juz joking
Eh actually l am an insecure guy too..when l hav my r/s with my ex..
the reason l feel insecure is becos scare other guys mite snatch her away..or she mite be toking with other guys and get attracted by them, scare she dun like me, or whether how much do she love me?
But l guess the problem y l hav such insecurities is becos..l dun noe alot of things, dun understand alot of things oso..l am still nt that mature..l dun hav the confidence and the lvl of maturity, l dun noe how to solve and handle problems well...all these things caused insecurities in guys...But l believe as when l hav grown up, and enriched myself with knowledge and confidence, get to noe more abt things liao, gain experience from lessons..only by this way.. It will evolve me to a better and secure guy =)
And l believe that all gals dun like guys that are insecure..insecurity in guys is oso a form of low self esteen in urself..=) -
same.. i always hv these insecure issues.
how long can the relationship last, does she really love me or she got ulterior motives, what if i commit too much then she leaves me. -
ya..l believe alot of guys hav such insecurities...but due to experiences and as we grow and learn, noe, hear, and go through more things..l believed 1 day we wont hav that kind of insecurity le..Originally posted by dumbdumb!:same.. i always hv these insecure issues.
how long can the relationship last, does she really love me or she got ulterior motives, what if i commit too much then she leaves me.
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last time.. my last relationship, i always had these feelings of doubts. i was very sure somehow it won't last. i didn't think she loved me for me, always had that feeling since she's gonna leave one day, might as well sooner than later type of feeling. shrugs
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Is it?Originally posted by xShevchenkox:ya..l believe alot of guys hav such insecurities...but due to experiences and as we grow and learn, noe, hear, and go through more things..l believed 1 day we wont hav that kind of insecurity le.. -
hm.. i guess bcuz now men and women are equal le loh.. but still in the process of courting a gal.. the gal still got many priviledges such as guy shld pay for the gal cannot any touch if not molest or rape zz. den if gal dun permit guy also cannot force. .veri hard to knoe whether the gal realli got like u anot, always not sure. when long le, suspicion grows, guy jealousy will grow, act like kids,anyhow blow temper, probably even the best tempered guy over long period might not take it. den + a breakup from the gal juz act as the trigger making the guy felt cheated and unable to take it den act so immature loh.
so i suggest gals shld try to open up, be alittle more touchy wif ur bf or if u realli dun like it den add more gifts and 'i love u's or sometimes give a treat, respect ur bf and give equal priviledges and dun say "i'm a gal so u muz give way to me" i think it juz pisses any guy off. on the other hand, guys shld also try to be more understanding and big hearted. confront her if u think the insecurity is too hard to bear.. if she meant to cheat u from the start, the ultimate outcome will still be a split whether its now or many years down the road. chances that she will like u after u spent many efforts to make her happi when she doesn't even wan to appreciate it is too low for me to even try @ all. -
they are more in touch with their emotions I suppose...
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Generalising.
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i dont think you should generalise
im very very sure that ill treat my gf very well i would give her my best and cherish her. -
ya...y ne? mc anything that u disagree on my comments...Feel free to voice it out..haha maybe my comments are oso wrong too..Originally posted by M©+square:Is it? -
is like asking why are girls so materialistic
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my life and future is too insecure to worry about insecurity in a r/s.
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have u been in relationship before in the 1st place?
it's easy to say when u r not in other's shoe.
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Originally posted by iceFatboy:I would gather 80% of topics here would be guys who after a breakup seems to be clinging on...
the general feel is that Modern guys are either insecure or imature to deal with relationship.
yes, mentally, gals do mature faster (in fact, 2 yrs) but it seems that modern guys fare much worse than this mental gap.
I am not generalising but on the whole, it seems that guys are lacking the social skills in knowing how to chat with a lady, how to be a gentleman, and how to end a relationship.
Yes, these are things that are not learned from books or from a soulmate but hey, if the gal can end it so professionally, surely, a guy can do that too.
Really, after reading most of the posts, guys seems most brittle when it comes to R/S.
The reason why you see so many guys lamenting about their BGR problem here is because guys usually don't talk about their stuff... vulnerablility and emotional distress in reality and generally find it a better channel to release it in viritual space, while girls, at first thought, usually find someone to talk about their problems and release it via another human being.
It's not about the gender; it's about the nature of this 'marketing' channel.
Cheers -
o.0 yea i agree. my gf always talk to me abt her problems. to me i listen veri sian =x cuz most of the times veri little stuffs also muz tell example, she accidently spilled her drink on the floor @ home z.z to us guys as long as we deem its small case, we keep it. keeping things in the heart is bad for the heartOriginally posted by Yunhaier: The reason why you see so many guys lamenting about their BGR problem here is because guys usually don't talk about their stuff... vulnerablility and emotional distress in reality and generally find it a better channel to release it in viritual space, while girls, at first thought, usually find someone to talk about their problems and release it via another human being.
It's not about the gender; it's about the nature of this 'marketing' channel.
Cheers
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ya lo...gals de problem always are very small de, most l shld say...my ex oso everyting oso want say to me...like wad happened in her sch and her happenings...Summore all those things are small small issues leh..sumtime l listen liao..l oso dun noe wad to say bkOriginally posted by cloud210:o.0 yea i agree. my gf always talk to me abt her problems. to me i listen veri sian =x cuz most of the times veri little stuffs also muz tell example, she accidently spilled her drink on the floor @ home z.z to us guys as long as we deem its small case, we keep it. keeping things in the heart is bad for the heart -
avaliablity heuristics
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would u rather she tell you nothing ?Originally posted by xShevchenkox:ya lo...gals de problem always are very small de, most l shld say...my ex oso everyting oso want say to me...like wad happened in her sch and her happenings...Summore all those things are small small issues leh..sumtime l listen liao..l oso dun noe wad to say bk 