Promises to wait
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Sigh, i've waited for 2 years... Many more to go... 'yawnsOriginally posted by FireIce:i think is lormantik leh -
Originally posted by StarPuppy:Do you think that in this age and society that making a promise to wait for a special someone is stupid?
does it show how dedicated this guy is?
This is actually a very good question.
A wait, in very general term, is probably a moment of inactivity and stagnation.
When you talk about 'promise', it kinda tweaked the meaning of wait. Usually, it connotes some kind of delusions from the victim him/herself because a 'wait' is not a promise - it's by choice. And when he/she sees it as a promise, it's probably more narcissistic than coming from genuine love itself.
You may ask: how do we differentiate delusional wait from non-delusional ones?
I supposed the judging comes from the circumstances creating the option for waiting.
But I must accentuate that waiting does not denote faithfulness or loyalty. Many people believe that waiting signifies dedication in love, but I can blatantly tell you it isn't. Not a cent.
I will reiterate my earlier point: waiting is by choice.
CloUdiSm states: '...Once in awhile, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a beautiful fairy tale. And people that weren't granted the fairy tale will recreate their own chapters... writing in scripts of fantasy...'
Originally posted by dokono:In any case, he should not wait, simply because the time spent on waiting can be used to chase other chicks who could be hotter.
Also, the fact he must be made to wait speaks volumes for the amout of love the girl has for the guy....
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....My point is, instead of waiting for that hopeless case, why don't you just go after other girls who are waiting for your love or could be better cases? Let's say you wait for 1 year and the girl still has not made her decision, aren't you wasting a lot of your time?
Instead, you could have used this one year of waiting and look for other partners. Don't let the girl make you wait like a fool while she is also looking at other handsome dudes. If she could make you wait, it only proves her respect for you is not much, let alone love.
doko I will share something - not to refute, but to provide one interesting view:
YouÂ’re the guy of opportunity cost
So much so that ultimately, you are the one you love the most.
You sure loved your woman; but that portion of love will never be more than what you have given to yourself.
Your love for self is so much that you cannot afford to put yourself at a compromised/disadvantageous position because you are always thinking of opportunity cost.
From here, how much do you think your love weighs on your side... without always having to mention the love on the other side of the scale first?
*** I am saying this because I am also somebody with concentrated dosage of self love and a good friend pointed this out and saying those words to me. I thought it was refreshing because it wasn't something that I consciously thought of and it burst certain linear thinking I had previously.
I think that the most amazing thing about love is that sometimes, it transcends logics?
The reason for your absolute mindset is because you have yet to meet someone that would truly make you fall head over heels for. Perhaps that day might come if you have decided to love yourself less... and someone else more.
Cheers -
he asked me to wait for him for 5 mths.
i turned him down. -
true but we are all victims of this stupidity.Originally posted by browniebaobao:love makes a person stupid. -
can agree to try to wait... but i don't believe in promises to wait. for example if nothing happens and we are all good, come the period of wait time, then by all means. but shouldn't get too upset if things change along the way.
usually the end result don't justify the wait. -
actually to me, waiting is just an excuse for ppl who dare not reject u at that particular moment of time.
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no leh... last time a girl almost agree to be my gf leh... i told her to wait cos she got her final year uni exams. after exams she lost interest. since that incident i think waiting is bullsh!t. i wouldn't put all my heart in those waiting games now.Originally posted by stellazio:actually to me, waiting is just an excuse for ppl who dare not reject u at that particular moment of time. -
First thing is you have to be objective and don't lie to yourself if the girl is worth waiting. If the girl doesn't love you, get yourself emotionally detached from her and move on to a new one.Originally posted by Yunhaier: I will share something - not to refute, but to provide one interesting view:
YouÂ’re the guy of opportunity cost
So much so that ultimately, you are the one you love the most.
You sure loved your woman; but that portion of love will never be more than what you have given to yourself.
Your love for self is so much that you cannot afford to put yourself at a compromised/disadvantageous position because you are always thinking of opportunity cost.
From here, how much do you think your love weighs on your side... without always having to mention the love on the other side of the scale first?
*** I am saying this because I am also somebody with concentrated dosage of self love and a good friend pointed this out and saying those words to me. I thought it was refreshing because it wasn't something that I consciously thought of and it burst certain linear thinking I had previously.
I think that the most amazing thing about love is that sometimes, it transcends logics?
The reason for your absolute mindset is because you have yet to meet someone that would truly make you fall head over heels for. Perhaps that day might come if you have decided to love yourself less... and someone else more.
Cheers
I have heard of people waiting for 10 years and the girl gets married. Don't let your love for her waste your time. Like I have said before, no one girl is special. Every girl is special in her own way. Some girls are good, some are bad. Go for those good girls. Don't waste time and money chasing the wrong girl who is not interested in you.
Because you know what? When age catches up with you and you are no longer physically attractive any more, you have to lower your standards.
doko -
Originally posted by dokono:First thing is you have to be objective and don't lie to yourself if the girl is worth waiting. If the girl doesn't love you, get yourself emotionally detached from her and move on to a new one.
I have heard of people waiting for 10 years and the girl gets married. Don't let your love for her waste your time. Like I have said before, no one girl is special. Every girl is special in her own way. Some girls are good, some are bad. Go for those good girls. Don't waste time and money chasing the wrong girl who is not interested in you.
Because you know what? When age catches up with you and you are no longer physically attractive any more, you have to lower your standards.
doko I know where you are coming from and wouldn't disagree, although I was a little disappointed that your reply didn't touch on the actual essence of my reply.
Well, I am cool though.
Peace out!
Cheers -
Originally posted by skeujin:wah isit a boy or a girl?
last we met cldnt see tt u wer preggy...
made in thailand. should be trans
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pup,Originally posted by StarPuppy:Do you think that in this age and society that making a promise to wait for a special someone is stupid?
does it show how dedicated this guy is?
it really depends on the situationÂ….. when you wait knowing that itÂ’s hopeless, thatÂ’s stupid or some may say romanticÂ….
Actually when u come to think about it, most ROMANTIC acts are STUPID in one way or anotherÂ….
Romeo and Juliet? Killed themselves for loveÂ… romantic? Yes. Stupid? Yes too.
Throwing away all that you have worked for, moving to a foreign land just for your partnerÂ…Â… romantic? Yes. Stupid? In a way, yes.
It all depends on your point of view.
When thereÂ’s some hope, hold on, wait for her/him. When hopeÂ’s gone, let go move on. -
One can have hope, but just don't be deluded.Originally posted by smudgey:pup,
it really depends on the situationÂ….. when you wait knowing that itÂ’s hopeless, thatÂ’s stupid or some may say romanticÂ….
Actually when u come to think about it, most ROMANTIC acts are STUPID in one way or anotherÂ….
Romeo and Juliet? Killed themselves for loveÂ… romantic? Yes. Stupid? Yes too.
Throwing away all that you have worked for, moving to a foreign land just for your partnerÂ…Â… romantic? Yes. Stupid? In a way, yes.
It all depends on your point of view.
When thereÂ’s some hope, hold on, wait for her/him. When hopeÂ’s gone, let go move on. -
i still think that most are just waiting to see if got better girls/guys in the horizon...once they found those, the wait will end
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It's alright. It's cool to exchange ideas. I get where you are coming from.Originally posted by Yunhaier: I know where you are coming from and wouldn't disagree, although I was a little disappointed that your reply didn't touch on the actual essence of my reply.
Well, I am cool though.
Peace out!
Cheers
About the self-love part?
Yeah. It's a bit about self love but you are wrong though. I do love someone a lot. But she has earned it. I think you are reading too much into it. I could tell from your last paragraph.
Im not some heartless person who can turn on and off as I wish haha. I have my deep love for someone else too. But you know what? If I recognise it's not mutual, it's useless to keep hoping she is the one. It takes two to tango. It looks romantic and all that but seriously, I think it exists only in dramas. We are in real life.
doko -
wait wait.. till she bye bye lo....
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There is nothing stupid about that. Just follow your heart.
It is true that in many instances we have heard about, waiting for someone yields no results, but that is not true for each and everyone. Do not be discouraged by these negative examples. Just ask yourself if there is even the slightest chance that she will be back, would you be willing to wait for her?
There, you have your answer. Wishing you all the best! -
Hmm..
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Ex BF promised to wait till me 21. And he is waiting. but i suppose it's not going to last.Originally posted by StarPuppy:Do you think that in this age and society that making a promise to wait for a special someone is stupid?
does it show how dedicated this guy is?
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any reasons?Originally posted by Quinsy:Ex BF promised to wait till me 21. And he is waiting. but i suppose it's not going to last. -
I am always waiting