Are u a loner in the office place?
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i would rather dine alone than to strand myself under topics which dun interest/ not common to me coz i need to put on a fake front..
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I love to dine alone too. Then just find a place to take a nap after that.
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But i am a pes e guy with anxiety problems last time.Would they look down on me and gossip about me because they think i chao keng.Maybe that the reason why they dont want to mix with me?Cause they got bad things to talk about me?Am I thinking too much or is that a possible reason?Originally posted by snoopii:maybe because you are new guy. some people do take time to warm up to new people. it depends on the culture too. in a culture which is full of politics, people tend to be suspicious of those whom they don't know too well yet, because of backstabbing, gossip, etc
my office culture is similar to yours. so don't fret, you are not alone
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Err...you really are quite pessimistic. No good ah....library has some self-help books which may be useful. Sometimes in life, it does not matter what others think of u lor. These people come and go. They dun matter in your life. What matters is that you know what you did was the best and most appropriate in that situation.Originally posted by Sakuragi86:But i am a pes e guy with anxiety problems last time.Would they look down on me and gossip about me because they think i chao keng.Maybe that the reason why they dont want to mix with me?Cause they got bad things to talk about me?Am I thinking too much or is that a possible reason?
Maybe one way is to smile to them, say good morning.
Look bright and sunny. Or try talking to them on common topics...(ya...is very hard I know). Or just smile lah. Sometime people dun want to interact with u coz you are temp. Last time I temp job, the superior dun bully me already happy, they dun eat with me happier. But when perm job, usually colleagues' attitude change one lor.
For the rest , thanks for all the other replies. I feel better already knowing its not ONLY my problem.
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I quite agree on the part on me being pessmitic.But what kind of self help books should i get?And i not temp ma,i am full time nsf.You mean i am new to the workplace?
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Dont worry too much about it. When I first started out on this job, and faced having to eat alone because everyone else doesnt seems friendly, I freaked out.
Slowly, I used to it.
Rather than joining a group for lunch and desperately trying to find common topics, it is easier to lunch in, and catch up on reading. =) -
Try to hang around with groups when people chit chat and talk c*ck... It can be FUN... Even if you don't contribute much, just listen lor...? If you really detest a certain group then jump on to a next group lah... Like that can find more kakis inside... Make your NSF life much easier too...Originally posted by Sakuragi86:I quite agree on the part on me being pessmitic.But what kind of self help books should i get?And i not temp ma,i am full time nsf.You mean i am new to the workplace? -
devil1976 thanks for your advices,really appreciate.
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No problem... Feel free to check out this forum too! http://www.sgforums.com/?action=forum_display&forum_id=1390Originally posted by Sakuragi86:devil1976 thanks for your advices,really appreciate. -
I am not sure err...what working as a NS man mean...
but as for self help books, in the library there is a section called self improvement. Slowly browse through. 0r search for this book "first impressions". Think its quite useful. Hiaz...been reading such books eversince I met my weird colleagues. -
Thats because you are there to work. Not to talk.
When your colleagues first came to work, they also chat a lot. But one fine day. they got scolded by boss for chatting during work hours. So now they just don't dare to talk anymore, even during lunch hour.
In time to come, you will also get used to not talking at work. You will act and behave just like them. -
Just try to make more friends with other Pes E guys. Then u wont feel so alone and pessimistic.Originally posted by Sakuragi86:I quite agree on the part on me being pessmitic.But what kind of self help books should i get?And i not temp ma,i am full time nsf.You mean i am new to the workplace? -
Yeah... i kanna asked by my supervisor to join them for lunch and get to know them betterOriginally posted by dragg:if you dont eat with them they will say you are anti-social.
it is obvious from the lunch group who is with who.
office politics.
Aiyah... actually just want to show the manager that we are veli "united" -
i also dun like eating together with office people or big crowd, but tio dragged, sian
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In my company, I chose to eat lunch with only 1 or 2 friends rather than go out with the majority.
The reason? Because that group consists of mainly oldies while my friends are newbies just like me. Sometimes, its just the difference in interests and background. Sometimes, its because of being in different departments resulting in conflicts? -
ya, me too.
sitting beside them for 10 hours aday, listening to stories about my son and daughter for 10 hours still not enough? still wanna listen to tat during lunch?
i rather have lunch with friends (usu they will drive over and we go somewhere else for lunch) or juz lunch with 1 or 2 closer colleague and then go shopping !!!!
oh, at times i go spa (alone) during lunch too -
haiz!! i hate lunch time/dinner time too!!! sometimes i wish the office dun haf haf those breaks(coz its time to take a break, all those office ppl oso take break, all slack around but got nothing to say to them) how i wish can juz do work n not talk. coz reali duno wad to say to them
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Ya...I can imagine certain situations can be worse than eating aloneOriginally posted by joyanz:haiz!! i hate lunch time/dinner time too!!! sometimes i wish the office dun haf haf those breaks(coz its time to take a break, all those office ppl oso take break, all slack around but got nothing to say to them) how i wish can juz do work n not talk. coz reali duno wad to say to them
1) Eating with people u detest
2) Nothing to talk about, very awkward to be there eating
3) Hearing boring topics on and on and on......
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well, this happens in my company as well.. as i am the youngest in my company so i don mix with those colleagues that are old enough to be my mum.. cos i find that we cun click.. our views and mentality clashes.. not only that, i also don tok to male colleagues as well cos i am a sexist. well, i only close with one of my female colleague but she is always on half day leave.. other than that, i will do my things quietly, waiting to knock off.Originally posted by sheri:I recently changed job, and the culture here is to lunch in , alone in the cubicle / eat with their ex-colleagues / gather at a table talking about their children 24/7. I choose not to eat at the table, because its irritating hearing "my child did this, my child did that". I just feel so old.
All the talk is work related, and although they are nice helpful people, I just feel so alone.
My previous job was very different in terms of job scope, so I am wondering if most office jobs are like this? In view that my job does not need interaction with others, its like I can sit at my chair whole day w/o talking
seriously, i prefer work that don require much interaction.. cos sometimes, u may say wrong things and end up being backstabbed by pple..