Originally posted by SumOne:
Do you ever still mule over failed chances to be with somebody or chase after somebody? Do you still think about what might have been if only you had gotten it right then? Do you still get angry with yourself at blowing a chance?
It's been years for me already, this friend of mine from school last time. She was a nice girl, popular, friendly, pretty. Most of all, she seemed comfortable around me. We had some common friends, so it was quite easy to meet her and we attended a lot of lectures together.
My friends and her friends were actually trying to match make us, and even people who didn't know us well expected us to be a couple. My friends had even said,"She's a good catch and she seems like your type of girl."
I kept thinking about her and couldn't sleep at times just remembering the day's events spent with her. I could spend my entire days just looking at her lovely face.
But alas, I lost myself and started acting uncharecteristically. She got scared I guess and before I knew it, she was with someone else. There were even friends who after knewing she was attached, asked out loud,"What about him?" Which was referring to me.
She's changed boyfriends since then, and I can see she's really found joy with her current boyfriend. I'm really happy for her and I'm glad the guy can look after her welll, and I would think better than me.
But till today, I still wonder to myself on late nights about what could have been. I still think about the things I should have done and the things I shouldn't or rather should have said.
We stayed friends even after I confessed to her and I really thank her for that. Close friends even and I was really glad because I thought I'd lost a dear friend. But we've drifted apart since then and she has her own life now and I have mine. But like I said, I still think about our short time together and I ask myself,why?
Hi
I have a similar experience. Let me tell you my story. Maybe this will help you a lot in time to come. I know this may sound unbelievable but it has happened to me. I have known this gal since JC. It has been more than 12 years since I have lost touch with her after I came out from JC and about to be enlisted. She was my neighbour that time and I would sometimes go to the same JC with her. We are not considered a couple (more like secret admirer). Probably both of us have our own issues that time; I have to study hard to get into university (int the end, my "A" level results has enabled me to go to one of the top engineering university in the world) while she is still studying hard to want to make it to her course of choice. I guess that time I have made the right decision not to pursue her but just to solely concentrate on my studies. I guess she also does not take a fancy of me considering I am quite nerdy that time....=p We have lost touch since I have shifted and 10-12 years back and the hp and internet is not prevalently used.
Fastforward 12 years to the present; I recently caught up with her by sheer accident and realised that we have attained/achieved similar education background, character, motivation and attitude towards our own goals and life. We both have attained our Hons degrees and our masters. She is working towards her 2nd while I am working towards my professional qualification and also embarking on my 2nd masters. (I have worked as an engineer and subsequently switched into the finance industry).
However the thing is that she was about to get married; we still have a great time together chatting about the past 12 years what has happened to our lives and the memories of her is still deeply entrenched in my mind. In terms of comparing our "resume" and character, we might consider the perfect match; a pair in a million; but I believe that she will do the right thing (since she has agreed to marry the other person and she is not young anymore), and I also know that I should leave her alone and lead my own life. However, the thought of missed chances always crops up.
Everything is fated. Initially I do not believe in fate until I met up with her again. The most important thing is everyone has to move on in life. I guess for your case,
it is still having that lingering feeling. I can understand that because sometimes I felt that too especially during the pockets of time when I am not working, studying or even pursuing my hobbies. Trust me, after 8-10 years, when you guys were to meet up again, you would have been happily settled down and so would she and by that time, nothing else matters other than your families. Most important thing now is to establish your career. Build up your confidence and self esteem by attending part-time degrees/masters/courses if you are working right now or broaden your social circle.
I had left a good and memorable impression in her and I would prefer to stay it that way. She also told me that this was one chapter in her life that she would remember and in time would tell her children and grandchildren about our meeting and encounter again after all these years.
Stop brooding over it. Improve yourself tremendously so that in time she will regret not being with you. Time can be your most powerful fren (if you make full use of it) or it can be your worst enemy (if you still brood about it and wasting time). It takes time as I have been through it but I told myself to move on and achieve whatever goals that I can possibly achieve.