i've lost..
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Well since you said being with her bring back the memories of those painful experience, might as well take this chance to distance yourself from her rite?Originally posted by sunpastilles:i dont need to find her only to occupy my time. i have lots of friends. its just that.. i miss her (im not a lesbian okayy) and different friends gimme different feelings ma..
hais actually theres a longgggg longgggg story behind this.
we were both tgt with this twin pair.
i got the elder bro, she got the younger one.
2 happy young couples. went bangkok together. many sleepovers. many dinners done.
but me and him broke up first. communicate breakdown i would say.
during the times when we were together, i already felt left out. i mentioned to her, she said i think too much. well thats becos she got treated like a queen cos the younger one really really loves her alot, he pays all his attention to her.
whereas mine.. he pays all his attention to the younger brother. (yes it sounds gay but he's not) he told me once before, he wont loves me as much as he loves his bro. well maybe between twins, they really have some special bond. i dont blame him. i just dont feel like a girlfriend.. not at all.
that was when.. i stopped loving him 100%. it was a really bad experience.. anyway, nowadays, the 3 of them are pretty happy together.. without me.
and i lost my best friend to them.. she spends so much time with him.. and my ex too.
maybe im just feeling all greens inside. i dunno. i just felt that... she's gone.... with/to them...
and becos of that... i wonder how am i going to hang out with her le.. our topics used to be about the boys. and now... what do we have in common? nothing.
its gonna be so hard to see her again.. i'll be reminded of my ex. though im pretty much over him.. but when i see her again, i dunno.. i just think that it'll bring back all those memories and.. sigh. i dunno.
this stinks.
Maybe you are feeling jealous la, I used to feel that when I saw my best fren in high school got attached (she was the one in our circle of frens who got attached the fastest) and spent all her time with her bf. Suddenly I dun feel like her best friend anymore.
But I decided that frens come and go, you will meet so many more people in your life, they might never give you the special feelings she gave you last time, but they are also special in their own ways, no?
You cant force her to be close with you now that she is spending more time with her bf...just occupy your time with other things and other people, and if she cherishes your frenship, she will come crawling back to you in a while when she gets tired of her bf
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I can only say for NOW:Originally posted by sunpastilles:i dont need to find her only to occupy my time. i have lots of friends. its just that.. i miss her (im not a lesbian okayy) and different friends gimme different feelings ma..
hais actually theres a longgggg longgggg story behind this.
we were both tgt with this twin pair.
i got the elder bro, she got the younger one.
2 happy young couples. went bangkok together. many sleepovers. many dinners done.
but me and him broke up first. communicate breakdown i would say.
during the times when we were together, i already felt left out. i mentioned to her, she said i think too much. well thats becos she got treated like a queen cos the younger one really really loves her alot, he pays all his attention to her.
whereas mine.. he pays all his attention to the younger brother. (yes it sounds gay but he's not) he told me once before, he wont loves me as much as he loves his bro. well maybe between twins, they really have some special bond. i dont blame him. i just dont feel like a girlfriend.. not at all.
that was when.. i stopped loving him 100%. it was a really bad experience.. anyway, nowadays, the 3 of them are pretty happy together.. without me.
and i lost my best friend to them.. she spends so much time with him.. and my ex too.
maybe im just feeling all greens inside. i dunno. i just felt that... she's gone.... with/to them...
and becos of that... i wonder how am i going to hang out with her le.. our topics used to be about the boys. and now... what do we have in common? nothing.
its gonna be so hard to see her again.. i'll be reminded of my ex. though im pretty much over him.. but when i see her again, i dunno.. i just think that it'll bring back all those memories and.. sigh. i dunno.
this stinks.
She and her BF dunno how to allocate time for privacy and for other things like family, friends and stuffs. Sooner or later they will get tired of one another and IF they break up (I said IF), they will realise what they have lost.
Its juz me toking. My baised view.
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i am a she will come back and find you when she break up provided she break up or maybe have problems in relationship she might contact you soon or later =D if u are a close friend of her ~
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To be blatantly honest, maybe the problem lies in yourself.
Jealousy stems from insecurity.
If you can't keep your insecurities in check, the cycle will repeat itself again and again. -
yes i agree with you totally. i think i just dont wanna admit that im jealous seeing that she still gets all that attention from them.Originally posted by curiousOrange:To be blatantly honest, maybe the problem lies in yourself.
Jealousy stems from insecurity.
If you can't keep your insecurities in check, the cycle will repeat itself again and again.
why am i jealous? i should not be, i am not. i have friends and time and suitors. still, it stinks.
sigh, thinking back, now i know how we got so distant.
at first it was a "hey im going over to their place, join me la??"
slowly it became a "oh im going over."
i remember i asked once like, "oh so u're going over now ah.. aiyo so last min, nvr tell me, den we can go together ma"
her reply was, "huh for wat? i going to meet my boyfriend wat. you shld have already plan smth with yours"
ever since then.. i knew, its gonna be like "SHE & BF" and "ME" and "MY BF". sometimes "SHE & BF & MY BF" whereas im just a "ME". im sooooo insignificant.
i started to feel left out really bad. i told my bf. he told his bro. his bro told her, and she came only to tell me i think too much. i was so embarrassed la. like my prob become discussed so openly. its affecting me so, they're doing it to me, but they dont realise anything wrong.
they talk in 3s. they laugh in 3s. they speak foreign languages which im totally disinterested, in 3s. they discuss in 3s. they stand in 3s.
there was never a space for me. and nope.. they never realised it........
nobody cares. -
erhaps its just some temperment. suck it up lo. now also not with his brother already, be glad. if u want to be a kind soul offer ur help when she asks. if u wan to do it the other way, no comments too.
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yes we are very darn close friends. and.. well many told me she'll come back and find me once she's single or needs anything again. and i wonder hard, will i still be there for her? after all these...Originally posted by ghimpheng:i am a she will come back and find you when she break up provided she break up or maybe have problems in relationship she might contact you soon or later =D if u are a close friend of her ~ -
thats what i think too. well, for now theres nth i can do right. she doesnt realise im gone. and.. if i speak to her about this, shes gonna say im mad. so.. just f it.Originally posted by Bontakun:I can only say for NOW:
She and her BF dunno how to allocate time for privacy and for other things like family, friends and stuffs. Sooner or later they will get tired of one another and IF they break up (I said IF), they will realise what they have lost.
Its juz me toking. My baised view. -
hope i'll be as hard hearted enough to do it the other way. LOL. sigh.Originally posted by Pitot:erhaps its just some temperment. suck it up lo. now also not with his brother already, be glad. if u want to be a kind soul offer ur help when she asks. if u wan to do it the other way, no comments too. -
well, always look on the bright side.Originally posted by sunpastilles:hope i'll be as hard hearted enough to do it the other way. LOL. sigh.
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You still have other friends besides her. Your personal life. Your family. Your work/studies. Your ambitions/resolutions.Originally posted by sunpastilles:thats what i think too. well, for now theres nth i can do right. she doesnt realise im gone. and.. if i speak to her about this, shes gonna say im mad. so.. just f it.
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yup true. but.. a fship of so many years.. and i've never lost a friend before.. and this is my first time.. and my bestest friend ever.Originally posted by Bontakun:You still have other friends besides her. Your personal life. Your family. Your work/studies. Your ambitions/resolutions.
sigh. -
If she's really your good sister and you are such of hers... You should try to understand that she'll need to live her own life too...?Originally posted by sunpastilles:i dont need to find her only to occupy my time. i have lots of friends. its just that.. i miss her (im not a lesbian okayy) and different friends gimme different feelings ma..
hais actually theres a longgggg longgggg story behind this.
we were both tgt with this twin pair.
i got the elder bro, she got the younger one.
2 happy young couples. went bangkok together. many sleepovers. many dinners done.
but me and him broke up first. communicate breakdown i would say.
during the times when we were together, i already felt left out. i mentioned to her, she said i think too much. well thats becos she got treated like a queen cos the younger one really really loves her alot, he pays all his attention to her.
whereas mine.. he pays all his attention to the younger brother. (yes it sounds gay but he's not) he told me once before, he wont loves me as much as he loves his bro. well maybe between twins, they really have some special bond. i dont blame him. i just dont feel like a girlfriend.. not at all.
that was when.. i stopped loving him 100%. it was a really bad experience.. anyway, nowadays, the 3 of them are pretty happy together.. without me.
and i lost my best friend to them.. she spends so much time with him.. and my ex too.
maybe im just feeling all greens inside. i dunno. i just felt that... she's gone.... with/to them...
and becos of that... i wonder how am i going to hang out with her le.. our topics used to be about the boys. and now... what do we have in common? nothing.
its gonna be so hard to see her again.. i'll be reminded of my ex. though im pretty much over him.. but when i see her again, i dunno.. i just think that it'll bring back all those memories and.. sigh. i dunno.
this stinks.
Like the others have suggested, this could be more like a honeymoon period...? Maybe have more meet ups with her (with or without her bf) when her relationship is more or less stabilised...? -
Originally posted by sunpastilles:thats what i think too. well, for now theres nth i can do right. she doesnt realise im gone. and.. if i speak to her about this, shes gonna say im mad. so.. just f it.
Then I would rather you be talking to her about it...?Originally posted by sunpastilles:yup true. but.. a fship of so many years.. and i've never lost a friend before.. and this is my first time.. and my bestest friend ever.
sigh.
Try to find some time out for a chat... Don't demand but just let her understand that ya need it... Be VERY CALM but slowly pour out and let her know what's going on... Alternatively, you can write her a letter? -
Bestest? Well... At least you now know the it should be better for you to stop now than drag till later.Originally posted by sunpastilles:yup true. but.. a fship of so many years.. and i've never lost a friend before.. and this is my first time.. and my bestest friend ever.
sigh. -
sunpastilles girl ar.. icic.. i thought u guy like her haha..
well~ yea lo.. most ppl zhong ze xin you one la..
my friends do tat, i do tat last time too..
wat to do..sometimes quite hurt one orh..
one of friend got bf also bastarded me as a close hangout friend recently haha.. just forget, find other friends as hangout buddies.. then ur ps friend sometimes contact for fun can le la..
not easy to find other hangout friends then do things by yourself lo..im already getting used to soloin~ -
Nothing is constant but changes.
when circumstances change, so will relationship. and vice versa.
Learn to let it go. Before long, you will realise that you no longer miss your this best friend. And all those in the past are but memory. -
don worry i can b a sister and acc u deOriginally posted by sunpastilles:haha. we were damn good friends. we're both females. how can i go after her?
she now spends so much time with her bf. she doesnt realise my existence.. nope, not anymore.....