Same problem as one of the forumite!
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Looking at such comments indeed put me to ease..at least l noe l am not aloneOriginally posted by ILPSY:I guess its normal bah......
When I spoke to an online friend on MSN, everything seems ok... conversation just flowed like water...
When I met him face-to-face, it seems that there was nothing to talk about. I guess its just the 1st meeting. And, he kept me waiting for 1 hour!
After that, when we met online again, no problem with conversation....
We decided to meet face to face again, and voila, we did not have any problems after our first meeting!
So, just relaxed about the whole thing!
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do random calling, and talk to people on the phone, thats what i did, was i was in NS, when i was damn boredOriginally posted by xShevchenkox:mc square...l really hav been telling to myself...dun be nervous..be relax when toking on fone with ppl that l hav nver see or tok with be4..but l dun noe y..my body keeps reacting in such a manner...
l did tried ...u see....but my body juz refuse it...who dun wan to be able to chat with ppl naturally and jovially...
actually tere r a few factors l noe of myself...l am afraid that sumtime if l am too relax in wad l say...l will offend dao ppl oso...
last time l dun dare to initiate any calls to unknown ppl..but at least l now dare...which l termed it as a 1st step....l really keep tellin myself..hey is alrite la...nthing to be scare and etc...really tried le..
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Everybody start somewhere.Originally posted by xShevchenkox:mc square...l really hav been telling to myself...dun be nervous..be relax when toking on fone with ppl that l hav nver see or tok with be4..but l dun noe y..my body keeps reacting in such a manner...
l did tried ...u see....but my body juz refuse it...who dun wan to be able to chat with ppl naturally and jovially...
actually tere r a few factors l noe of myself...l am afraid that sumtime if l am too relax in wad l say...l will offend dao ppl oso...
last time l dun dare to initiate any calls to unknown ppl..but at least l now dare...which l termed it as a 1st step....l really keep tellin myself..hey is alrite la...nthing to be scare and etc...really tried le..
When you get more 1st steps, you get more used to it.
It's just like, when you go public and get to talk to strangers of the opposite sex. The more you do it, the more natural it becomes.
And in future, whoever calls you. You're able to handle it with style and socialise, connect and create bonds even on the phone. -
so mc...ur advice to me is to that l shld juz keep on pushing myself and keep on trying rite?Originally posted by M©+square:Everybody start somewhere.
When you get more 1st steps, you get more used to it.
It's just like, when you go public and get to talk to strangers of the opposite sex. The more you do it, the more natural it becomes.
And in future, whoever calls you. You're able to handle it with style and socialise, connect and create bonds even on the phone. -
Of cos lah, just like when you're still a toddler, you're crawling. You need to try to walk to know how to walk mahhhh!!!!Originally posted by xShevchenkox:so mc...ur advice to me is to that l shld juz keep on pushing myself and keep on trying rite?
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okie thanks...l will keep on trying bah ^^Originally posted by M©+square:Of cos lah, just like when you're still a toddler, you're crawling. You need to try to walk to know how to walk mahhhh!!!! -
The earlier you get used to it, the more advantage you'll have.Originally posted by xShevchenkox:okie thanks...l will keep on trying bah ^^
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sure...cuz l oso tink that it is impt to be able to communicate with ppl as fast as l could...and overcoming tis weird actions l hav when toking to unknown ppl...l noe is sumtinz tat need to be improve =DOriginally posted by M©+square:The earlier you get used to it, the more advantage you'll have. -
X 2. Not everything should be measured by $ alone.Originally posted by FireIce:but it's good training....... -
Start with just short conversations then...?Originally posted by xShevchenkox:hmm good idea for short converstions but nt long conversations
Learn to walk 1st before ya learn to fly.....? -
And you did not attend da AA outing on wed!Originally posted by xShevchenkox:Well to all here...
l tink l oso posses a problem similar to one of the forumite starting this topic...
l dare to call up my good guy frenz and tok abt sch wrk and etc, ask them out...joke with them
But to those ppl...that l noe online...nver see be4 or tok be4 de...juz chat in msn and game..then one day...l hav to call them..tell them sumtinz...especially gals...l will be kinda nervous...like mind empty empty de...cnt tink of topics to say...very jialat... is like dun noe y lehz...feel so awkward like that.....
Does anyone noe what is this problem of mine mah? l did ask a guy frenz..whether l am normal or not...he say of coz la...he told me if he were to speak to sumone he had nver spoken be4 on phone...he oso will be nervous...
I brought da book for you!
And dun worry, its pretty to behave nervous to speak to someone you actually never really met. Coz you more or less concerned is he nice or wat? Later sae wrong liao den how? Or got different view then buay gam?
All these are taken into consideration as you do not know the person well yet. Once know better liao it will be easier to talk to him. Same thing as when you first talked to me mah. Its not easy at first but slowly can 1 lah. -
Haha...Paiseh bontakun..cuz l am studying for my papers...actually want to go de..but there is still so much for me to go through....devil did pm me...and l told him to put me as TBC....Originally posted by Bontakun:And you did not attend da AA outing on wed!
I brought da book for you!
And dun worry, its pretty to behave nervous to speak to someone you actually never really met. Coz you more or less concerned is he nice or wat? Later sae wrong liao den how? Or got different view then buay gam?
All these are taken into consideration as you do not know the person well yet. Once know better liao it will be easier to talk to him. Same thing as when you first talked to me mah. Its not easy at first but slowly can 1 lah.
Or if u can...l go ur hse nearby tk the book, afterall we stay quite close
ya precisely..this is oso one of the factor.....u hit on the spot..and ya...afraid to say the wrong thing, scare offend ppl with ur jokes and words...cuz u dun noe the person character yet mah...
l tink l am those that can only tok with ppl well and easy...after l hav interact with them for quite sumtime?
oh ya and wish u happy chinese new year!! -
Ya l am trying to hav sum short conversations now..but tink l am inpatient to see the results bah..that is y l began to worry and frustrated abt myself... y like that ah?Originally posted by Devil1976:Start with just short conversations then...?
Learn to walk 1st before ya learn to fly.....?
But with determination, l will continue pushing and trying till l am okie with it. -
wah!! I actually also wanted to post dis qn!!
I am za boh.. Den i abit ham when ppl i not very shou de approach me.. eg. u noe the person in class, but u guys seldom hang out tgt de.
For example, when waiting for bus/go home tgt, really damn kan cheong, dunoe wad to say!!
Den most of the time i just zhao when i see them approaching, or take the longer route so as not to meet them.
My fren says i suffer from social anxiety. But the problem is i'm quite noisy in class leh.. but 1 to 1 nothing to say i will feel gan1 ga4, so i rather avoid the situation rather den face it. -
Ya...l actually tink quite long before l decide to post this problem of mine...Originally posted by motoway:wah!! I actually also wanted to post dis qn!!
I am za boh.. Den i abit ham when ppl i not very shou de approach me.. eg. u noe the person in class, but u guys seldom hang out tgt de.
For example, when waiting for bus/go home tgt, really damn kan cheong, dunoe wad to say!!
Den most of the time i just zhao when i see them approaching, or take the longer route so as not to meet them.
My fren says i suffer from social anxiety. But the problem is i'm quite noisy in class leh.. but 1 to 1 nothing to say i will feel gan1 ga4, so i rather avoid the situation rather den face it.
haha, saw a few forumities starting topics similar to mine..then l decide to post for sum advices...
Sumtime l really will like to noe more and be close with the person l juz noe...
But sumhow body juz couldnt listen to wad l instruct..and even if l tok..l think it sounds very unnatural and awkward
l noe when approaching ppl..u must be frenly and etc... l always smile to my good frenz for no reason de..xi guan le..Den if l use this trademark smile and smile and new ppl that l noe..l oso afraid they think l siao tin tong...or wad..they mite be tinking hey this guy siao de ah...keep smiling for no reason sia...and oso sum gals mite tink...this guy must be tinking of sum thing dirty..smile so happily like tico pek or wad...
haha...same same lo...but good thing is u are za bor...l tink za bor keep quiet oso alrite..cuz it is always guy making the initiative to tok to u all 1st de mah... -
no leh.. I tink hor.. if ger and ger tgt both keep quite more gan ga lo..Originally posted by xShevchenkox:Ya...l actually tink quite long before l decide to post this problem of mine...
haha, saw a few forumities starting topics similar to mine..then l decide to post for sum advices...
Sumtime l really will like to noe more and be close with the person l juz noe...
But sumhow body juz couldnt listen to wad l instruct..and even if l tok..l think it sounds very unnatural and awkward
l noe when approaching ppl..u must be frenly and etc... l always smile to my good frenz for no reason de..xi guan le..Den if l use this trademark smile and smile and new ppl that l noe..l oso afraid they think l siao tin tong...or wad..they mite be tinking hey this guy siao de ah...keep smiling for no reason sia...and oso sum gals mite tink...this guy must be tinking of sum thing dirty..smile so happily like tico pek or wad...
haha...same same lo...but good thing is u are za bor...l tink za bor keep quiet oso alrite..cuz it is always guy making the initiative to tok to u all 1st de mah...
So normally i ask retarded qn like.. "sch sux hor?"
Hahah.. I mean this is the best i can come up with lar.. LOL
But dunoe leh, perhaps i pressure myself to live up to other's expectation of me (interesting, chatty, fun)
coz i'm usually very noisy in class.. den if suddenly with tt person nothing to say den i scared the person feel it's her fault..
OOps, i hope i get my pt across lol.. -
ya..l understand what u sayOriginally posted by motoway:no leh.. I tink hor.. if ger and ger tgt both keep quite more gan ga lo..
So normally i ask retarded qn like.. "sch sux hor?"
Hahah.. I mean this is the best i can come up with lar.. LOL
But dunoe leh, perhaps i pressure myself to live up to other's expectation of me (interesting, chatty, fun)
coz i'm usually very noisy in class.. den if suddenly with tt person nothing to say den i scared the person feel it's her fault..
OOps, i hope i get my pt across lol.. , dun wry!
cuz we are sumhow in the same boat
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Don't have to push yourself too much lah... Be patient... Like I've said, don't try to fly before you learn to walk!Originally posted by xShevchenkox:Ya l am trying to hav sum short conversations now..but tink l am inpatient to see the results bah..that is y l began to worry and frustrated abt myself... y like that ah?
But with determination, l will continue pushing and trying till l am okie with it.