will u be hurt if this happen to u?

• Xephone_xenon

  19 Mar 07, 18:27

  Originally posted by mhcampboy:

  If it were me, I would forget about my birth parents.
  
  For 28 years, you were brought up by your current family. They are your real parents. Nothing else matters.

  True.
  
  Blood related or not. It does not matter.
• meiji

  19 Mar 07, 22:39

  first, *hugz*
  
  i am 27 and i am adopted. found out when i was in sec sch.
  it was not that hard for me to accept. maybe because the truth came to me and i didnt have to search for it. whereas for you, you are still searching for an answer, a closure.
  
  i'm not good with words, so i seldom post here. if you would like to talk, can pm me
  
  take care.
• AndrewPKYap

  20 Mar 07, 07:33

  Originally posted by upset:

  if u are 28, married with a happiy family, u have almost everything in life, an only child. U have always suspected tat u are adopted because of some feelings. Then One day, u muster up enough courage to know the whole truth and ask around. In the end, the truth is out that u are adopted. Ur birth parents had given u away because of poverty. U wanted very much to find ur birth parents, but scared that ur birth parents may not remember u. Or afraid that ur actions to find ur birth parents will hurt ur foster parent. what will u do?

  " u have almost everything in life"... wah lao instead of enjoying life to the max, you worry about "nonsense". What is wrong with you?
• <Precious>

  20 Mar 07, 08:22

  Since I'm already 28, married with my own family, who my real parents are will cease to play an important part of my life. I won't even bother to investigate to find out who they really are. I'll just take my foster parents as the real ones. Anyway, I'll be indeted to my foster parents for the many years they have taken care of my needs and if anybody's to be repaid, it's my foster parents!
  
  Already having my own family, I will treasure my present and work hard towards our future, not waste unnecessary time and effort tracking history as in who my true parents are..........
• niquelicious

  20 Mar 07, 11:35

  if you must know, family is NOT determined by blood
  but the connection via the heart
  
  for example when they say blood is thicker than water, have you wondered how it applies for tthe relationship between husband and wife?
  
  well, if you really do find ur real parents, do bear in mind that the only impression they have of you is when they saw you before they left you. unless they have stealthily stalked you for the past many years. but then you would still not have known them.
  
  the difficult part comes when you start comparing between both parties. so try not to.
  
  actually im not sure what im driving at =(
  aii...
  but its not rlly an envious position to be in
  
  you have my well wishes~ gambatte
  
• pwnz0r

  20 Mar 07, 13:58

  its ok to 'know' them. but beyond that, there should be anymore than that
• Yunhaier

  20 Mar 07, 14:11

  Originally posted by upset:

  if u are 28, married with a happiy family, u have almost everything in life, an only child. U have always suspected tat u are adopted because of some feelings. Then One day, u muster up enough courage to know the whole truth and ask around. In the end, the truth is out that u are adopted. Ur birth parents had given u away because of poverty. U wanted very much to find ur birth parents, but scared that ur birth parents may not remember u. Or afraid that ur actions to find ur birth parents will hurt ur foster parent. what will u do?

  You must be prepared to face the consequences of truth, should you decide to pursue the real identity of your birth parents.
  
  Whether you pursue or not, it shouldn't change the status quo of your current happy family life. If you reckon that it will, then it may be better to keep the skeleton deep right inside the cupboard.
  
  Cheers
• browniebaobao

  20 Mar 07, 23:01

  tricky situation..
  
  i think i will look for my biological parents..
  
  and still treat my foster parents like biological parents..
  
  and be filial to all of them.
• browniebaobao

  20 Mar 07, 23:02

  Originally posted by :

  Since I'm already 28, married with my own family, who my real parents are will cease to play an important part of my life. I won't even bother to investigate to find out who they really are. I'll just take my foster parents as the real ones. Anyway, I'll be indeted to my foster parents for the many years they have taken care of my needs and if anybody's to be repaid, it's my foster parents!
  
  Already having my own family, I will treasure my present and work hard towards our future, not waste unnecessary time and effort tracking history as in who my true parents are..........

  without ur real parents, you wun even exist.
• UandMe

  20 Mar 07, 23:06

  Originally posted by browniebaobao:

  without ur real parents, you wun even exist.

  i wish i was nv borned, shd i blame my real parents?
• subarugal

  20 Mar 07, 23:15

  i wouldn't find the truth.
  Coz nothing beat the hardship parental guideance shown since i was born.
  And the real truth is you are meeting some stranger family too.
  And the truth might not be as beautiful as it is..
  
  Ignorance is bliss.
• Devil1976

  21 Mar 07, 08:38

  Originally posted by subarugal:

  i wouldn't find the truth.
  Coz nothing beat the hardship parental guideance shown since i was born.
  And the real truth is you are meeting some stranger family too.
  And the truth might not be as beautiful as it is..
  
  Ignorance is bliss.

  hi gal! Long time no see!
• viciouskitty74

  21 Mar 07, 10:18

  Has anyne thought about it from the foster parents point of view?
  
  I doubt they will be terribly hurt if the TS did locate his birth parents.
  
  What will hurt them will be that IF TS abandon the foster parents.
  
  It will hurt any parents. Be them birth or fosters.
• Devil1976

  21 Mar 07, 11:27

  Should we be more grateful if they're just your foster parents but yet still take care of you as good...?
• nuchio

  21 Mar 07, 11:36

  Originally posted by subarugal:

  i wouldn't find the truth.
  Coz nothing beat the hardship parental guideance shown since i was born.
  And the real truth is you are meeting some stranger family too.
  And the truth might not be as beautiful as it is..
  
  Ignorance is bliss.

  this happened to my friend who went all the way to japan to find her birth mother (she is half jap) after he 'o' levels; using her entire life savings and spending years in search of her.
  
  only to be met with the phrase - "i have my own family now. please leave me alone".
  
  you already have what it takes to be happy, why do you bother?
  
  zhi zhu chang le - contentment is bliss
• browniebaobao

  21 Mar 07, 20:47

  Originally posted by UandMe:

  i wish i was nv borned, shd i blame my real parents?

  may i know why?
• kristovorus

  24 Mar 07, 21:14

  if i were u.. i rather not know whether im adopted or not.. in this case ignorance is bliss.. 28 years and they still wouldnt come and find me? i'm better off with my foster parents.. im not sure if i can forgive my biological parents anyway. People say just forgive and forget.. but my foster parents > my biological parents no matter how tragic a story my biological parents come out with. btw.. the negative effects of interbreeding ( marrying someone ur related by blood ) will not appear so fast.. haha u have to have a few consecutive generations of that happening. but i agree sister marrying brother would be kind of sick
• Taiwanpolitics

  24 Mar 07, 23:00

  foster parents r more noble than biological ones .
  
  
  
  shen mu bu lu yang mu ......