hi ladies/mum/wife
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Do you live for your family or for those people who laugh at you and look down on you? I don't even see how the views of outsiders should even play a part in your decision-making...Originally posted by alba:(i tell ppl they laugh at me and look me so down).
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any tips? wat to do? i am struck,
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we had the same problem when our kids were young. my wife had wanted to give up her job to look after the kids. To give up her job would means halfing our income. we had a huge home loan, the standard of living etc.
fortunately, i had my sister-in-law who was a housewife (their children big liao) who offer to help us. We employed a maid to help up in all the chores while she help to look after the children. This put us at ease and we were able to concentrate on our work.
We had to travel everyday to her house with the kids and maid in toll and to bring them back home every night. Do spend time with the children if possible. For me, every evening, i will alway bring my children out for a walk. We will admire the little flowers or grass along the road or walk to the aquarium to look at fishes.
Every night, if possibe, we will read with them or tell them stories (sometime cook up stories). or sometime sleeping with them in their room.
If you ask me, it's very tiring after work and spend time with your children. but looking back, i have never regretted it.
So, if you can have someone trustworthy to help you, it may help -
That is what I am doing right now, I only get to see my kid at 7pm after dinner , I am too tired to even talk, and sheis asleep at 9pm already. I mean that after school,1pm onwards till 7pm I miss that part.
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gather ideas and opinion from many pple then make your own judgement call...Originally posted by alba:any tips? wat to do? i am struck,
no single person answer is right or wrong -
agree...why care what pple think?Originally posted by walesa:Do you live for your family or for those people who laugh at you and look down on you? I don't even see how the views of outsiders should even play a part in your decision-making...
let say if u can earn big $$$ by being a hawker or a baker, which matter more to you?
the "low status" of being a hawker or u earning big $$$? -
HDB tai tai also can ?Originally posted by Quinsy:If I can be tai tai, I won't mind.
or must be those rich tai tai? -
what is making u that tired?Originally posted by alba:That is what I am doing right now, I only get to see my kid at 7pm after dinner , I am too tired to even talk, and sheis asleep at 9pm already. I mean that after school,1pm onwards till 7pm I miss that part.
if ur job is making u that tired...then either change to less tiring job or increase ur energy level so that u wont be that tired.
Or if ur diet or not enough sleep is cause, then do something abt it...
bottom line, find out what is causing u that tire? -
Hmmm no kids for me yet and we did talk about it before as well
If I quit my job it will be halving the income as well and we have loans and all
And we do not have the luxury of having someone look after the kids since most of our family are busy with work themselves.
Anyway, talking about my mum, she quit her job to look after me and my brother after we were born
My dad was earning enough so that wasn't an issue
She went back to work at 40 and was fortunate to get a good boss and draws a decent salary
Her boss decided to migrate and sold off the business and she was lucky enough to get an even better job opportunity
Now she is busy at work and travelling around at age 50 and enjoying herself
I guess it depends on how you try to work things out and put in the best you can.
Why bother how people look at you?
Anyway, there is nothing shameful about baking and selling baked goods
That is how Begawan Solo started anyway. -
ya lor...be more confident and believe in ur self.Originally posted by elindra:Why bother how people look at you?
Anyway, there is nothing shameful about baking and selling baked goods
That is how Begawan Solo started anyway.
even gara guni can be millionaire....depend on how u do business
every business has it own risk -
Is your husband's job stable enough?Originally posted by alba:thanks, too bad, hubby not that high earner, but the home is in chaos, only 1 kid abt 8yrs old, and she's all alone , lonely and i feel i never seem to be a mum to her, everyday too tired to even check her work, or talk to her, and school work seem flop, and don't even know time table, (my fault too tired to teach, and weekends doing housework or resting sleep), so i feel so guilty, butmoney important also right, so headache,
if i stop working, no income, but what if she grows up later, what will i do? any suggestion, i love to cook, bake cakes, any suggestion. i don't think i will fit to working life later 5yrs later, i will be 45yrs old. what can i do when kids grown up. i am confuse and life in spore need lots of money to survive, whichi simportant? is it worth it to give up?
what normally full tim ehousewife do ? with no income is it save?
Can you afford to do some low risk investments...? -
ha. that's the price of being parents but i NEVER regret spending the time with them however tired i am it till this day. both my kids are already in their teens and somehow i miss those days they come to us for everything.Originally posted by alba:That is what I am doing right now, I only get to see my kid at 7pm after dinner , I am too tired to even talk, and sheis asleep at 9pm already. I mean that after school,1pm onwards till 7pm I miss that part.
put aside your weekends for them to go outing such as to the beach, to the library, to playground, fly kites in marina, to lim chu kang vegetables farm, animals farm, reserviors, botanical garden etc. it's sometime they will enjoy and you can relax with them and watch them grow.
it's a tough decision and only you can decide for yourself.
oh, spending time with them is not checking homework but talking to them about every other things. i used to(am still doing) fetch my children to school (both different school) every morning waking up at 5.30am. when a neighbour offer to send my kids to school coz his son was the same school as mine, i politely turn down the offer because this is also an opportunity foor me to talk to them. if you need time, try finding them. best wishes -
my aunt was a full time mother until my cousin went to sec 1... she went back to work in factories as operator etc lar..
mother n daughter very close... esp cos single child.
at 1 point, my aunt's husband was working part time also to bring in extra money... -
If I were to get married...means that I am ready to settle down and have kids.
Yes I will give up my career to get my kids good guidance from me.
If not...I rather stay single, can have fun go disco, holidays anytime, etc.
Of course my mission in life is to die die get a rich hubby, so that I can be a housewife comfortably. This will be a happy family when money is not the main issue. -
hmm we were thinkin, depending on our age and the $$ if my siblings are out of sch (in 5/6 years time) my mom can help to look after the kids (if we have 1)Originally posted by elindra:Hmmm no kids for me yet and we did talk about it before as well
If I quit my job it will be halving the income as well and we have loans and all
And we do not have the luxury of having someone look after the kids since most of our family are busy with work themselves.
Anyway, talking about my mum, she quit her job to look after me and my brother after we were born
My dad was earning enough so that wasn't an issue
She went back to work at 40 and was fortunate to get a good boss and draws a decent salary
Her boss decided to migrate and sold off the business and she was lucky enough to get an even better job opportunity
Now she is busy at work and travelling around at age 50 and enjoying herself
I guess it depends on how you try to work things out and put in the best you can.
Why bother how people look at you?
Anyway, there is nothing shameful about baking and selling baked goods
That is how Begawan Solo started anyway.
if not, i'm gettin my pri sch buddy's mother to help us with the kid... it helps that i'm livin near this big park... the whole family could go for walks every evening after dinner =D might help with the bonding... husband n wife; parents n kids.. -
remember that we live far away from our parentsOriginally posted by shinta:hmm we were thinkin, depending on our age and the $$ if my siblings are out of sch (in 5/6 years time) my mom can help to look after the kids (if we have 1)
if not, i'm gettin my pri sch buddy's mother to help us with the kid... it helps that i'm livin near this big park... the whole family could go for walks every evening after dinner =D might help with the bonding... husband n wife; parents n kids..
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i am wandering is money going to be enough if i be full time mum, which is more important, i guess both, but i am still thking most important. ibut of course hv own business small one can still make me survive for day to day living right, i tried spending 1 day wth my kid full heartedly, and she is so so happy, and enjoy being with me, until today, whatever i ask her she do it, she is so happy. i just play with her last night like she like to be cashier pr salesgal explaining me of her product (promoter) and sh eis so happy i play with her i become the customer, and today she is so eager to play again, oh no i am so tired to play again today, imagine thtat? anyway i know spending time with them, playing with them really make them so so happy. i am touched. maybe i save somem oney now first, (not spending a cent so that i can be full time mum fast).
any tips how to earn extra money wtih interest of mine such as bakery,cooking, biscuit, can it work, where do i sell them, i am thking pushcart, is it good?any idea,can earn or not? my husband laugh when i say that, he say don't wish i can earn> -
hmm. depend bah. mostly had to see the income.
but i hope to take care of my kids too. -
my kid sis was looked after by my great grand aunt...Originally posted by elindra:remember that we live far away from our parents
my parents will bring her over on sunday nights, and bring her back home on friday nights... cos my grandparents can't really cope with 3 wild kids plus 1 baby...
that stopped when my sister turned 3 years old i think... mom got a maid to look after us... and when she was 4, she went to this child care centre near our place... the maid wasn good so mama sent her back to the agency.. (anyhow beat my kid sis
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a fren of mine is doin what mom did last time.. she bring her baby back from her aunt's place for 1 day every week... she spend her off day lookin after the baby, den at night her aunt comes down to bring the baby back to her place...
1 child is with a babysitter.. the older child is with her mother...
not a very nice arrangement from my pov -
Thinking of stopping later save money for 1 yr. Then thinking of learning baking biscuit and sell.what do u think, any tips how to get started. Like thinking renting pushcaart and sell my biscuit and get them to order if they like it, an tips how to promote? Is it good?or maybe put it in website. I ‘ve not much capital. Is that good idea. Pls give me idea. But some ppl ask me what if no one want to buy your biscuit, throw away?
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Hey, you are at least willing to consider options to have more time with your child. That is great.
I know Singapore is kinda hard to be working part time, but can you try negotiating with your company for you to work from home?
For starting business, if possible, why not attached yourself to a actual bakery first? So you know what is needed for the industry and the demands of the market? I am sure they will welcome even a part time baker. Maybe your starting time can be arranged that you start work as early as 2am?
For subsidised courses to launch you into another career path, you might want to consider checking out the Chinese Development Assistance Council. CDAC. they subsidised for a lot of courses, mostly on skills training. -
well, you need a hawkering licence to sell the biscuits. And it cannot be done from home.
Even for pushcarts, you will need food handling licence, a food production factory and you still need to be there 24/7 to sell your biscuits.
Even if you manage to find someone to mind your pushcart, you need to consider overheads & management too. -
Having the best of both worlds is often an ideal situation whereby possibility is very low. And everyone has to acknowledge that. If you always can have the best of both worlds then you're not leading a normal life.Originally posted by alba:hi will u give up your career and be a full time housewife and mum to your kids, is it worth it, but what abt yr future. after the kids grown up, what will u do?
Having a working couple is good in the sense that you can have a dual income. In the event when one is out of employment, the other can hold on for a while before the person who loses the job can recover. There is always a possibility that the recovery will take ages. So in this way there will always be part of the income still incoming & the very basic problem of income is not going to be too much of an issue.
However, time with the kids will be drastically reduced.
Also after resting for so long before you start looking for a job will also jeopardise your chances of securing a good job with a reasonable income.
It is a matter of risks to be taken. Which side you want to take depends on what kind of consequences are you willing to face in case you lose that risk. -
The other way of selling home made cookies, are best done during the festive season and build up the clientale from there.
You can canvass for orders from neighbours & collegues first. Then create your webpage for your friends to view & possibly order more goodies from you in future.
But take note, that because you arent licenced to produce cookies/cakes or cupcakes as a business. You have to be discreet about taking orders and selling them in public. -
I gave up a good paying job to stay home when my kids were in Pri sch., never regretted it. I'm lucky cos my hubby can afford to.
Being a stay-at-home mum, the kids are better behaved & the bond is closer.
Also they perform better in sch.
As long as u keep yourself busy, take up a hobby, then u don't get bored.
To earn some pocket money, u may like to consider taking part-time job. One of my fren work 3 times a week doing admin.
Either start a small internet business. My daughter did this during her spare time. Can be quite lucrative.
If u like baking, try selling to colleagues & friends first. Build up a reputation, also try selling online.