Wife Likes another Man?
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Ask yourself this question first...
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Nothing wrong if she likes another man. That man may be a good hawker, or a good fish monger, or a good butcher, or some one good. This is normal.Originally posted by civicster:Hi all...What would you do if you found out that your wife likes another man even though she is married to you. To pretend noting ever happen or confront her? But somehow you will feel very upset about it. Would appriciate your inputs.
Regards
Since she is married to you, it is what she does, that could cause problems.
If she is starstruck by that man, and neglects you, family, and home,or behaves inappropriately, that of course is not acceptable. -
Hi all, thanks for all you comments. Well, how do I find out about that? Just a few days ago I accidentally looked at my wife's dairy and she wrote that she still have feelings for this guy, although she didn't mention who, I more or less knows who this guy is as he and my wife used to be an item and somehow this guy is quite a filrt. In the end they didn't get together for some reasons.
From what I know, this guy tried to stay away from my wife and only treat her as a friend.
Since this is her secret and the guys know what he is doing and like what browniebaobao said, I should give her more AA instead. When problem arises we should not blame anyone but try to reflect what went wrong despite my hetic work and part-time studies.
Regards. -
u better not let her noe tat u peep at her diary..
anyway, i think u might want to try shower her more love or care if u havent been doing. let her feel the 'guilt'.
but if u have been treating her nice enough and this is wad u get from her, beat her up!
infidelity is bad. -
Sometimes I feel gals (even when they are married) will remember and think of past relationships where they still like or desire that person. As you mentioned, that guy is a flirt and probably have hurt your wife and there is still a love/hate feeling for that guy. As for what has happened between them I do not know but please note that all is in the past and it does not matter anymore. If she is sensible enough, she should build her future with you.Originally posted by civicster:Hi all, thanks for all you comments. Well, how do I find out about that? Just a few days ago I accidentally looked at my wife's dairy and she wrote that she still have feelings for this guy, although she didn't mention who, I more or less knows who this guy is as he and my wife used to be an item and somehow this guy is quite a filrt. In the end they didn't get together for some reasons.
From what I know, this guy tried to stay away from my wife and only treat her as a friend.
Since this is her secret and the guys know what he is doing and like what browniebaobao said, I should give her more AA instead. When problem arises we should not blame anyone but try to reflect what went wrong despite my hetic work and part-time studies.
Regards.
The guy has been reasonable by trying to stay away from your wife.
I understand working and studying part-time is not easy as I am still going through it and this may be the reason why your wife chooses you because of your determination to do well and succeed in life. Take heart. Affairs of the heart is difficult to fathom. -
right on.Originally posted by EngAudListCo_Director:Affairs of the heart is difficult to fathom. -
cannot confront cos' you violated her privacy...in any case, since you don't think it'll lead to anything, just leave it as is and treat her special enough for her to forget that guy...
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Seriously, dude, the best method is still to rekindle the flame in the relationship.
Bring her to a nice posh restaurant, give her bouquets, the works.
It should work
Dont give 'being busy' as an excuse not to shower your significant other with love
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Yup, am trying to rekindle the flame first. Seriously I don't mind what happen in the past before we get together. But right now since we are already married, one should know where their limit is and be faithful.
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I think your wife might be just missing out on a lot of your attention... maybe the ex-bf, being a flirt, knows how to give girls attention.. so she kind of looks back and remember some fond memories...
I empathize with your situation, with work and part-time studies... it's very siong indeed...
she's not being unfaithful by expressing her feelings to herself... we should always respect the genuine feelings of other people...
My suggestion to you is to show ur wife more attention (no need to be lavish...), just listen to her more (complaints and all)... and everything would be alright...
Once you succeed in showering her with more attention and love, her feelings for the ex-bf will subside into the background... -
Originally posted by Eric Cartman:bargain for rights to like another woman
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It all started way back before you married her. That's the root of the problem guy.Originally posted by civicster:Yup, am trying to rekindle the flame first. Seriously I don't mind what happen in the past before we get together. But right now since we are already married, one should know where their limit is and be faithful.
I think you married the wrong girl. The interest wasn't even there to begin with. When her mind is not whole-heartedly with you, problems will arise. How can she think about you when she doesn't have much interest when you started dating her?
doko -
u will be surprise dat some guys prefer to bear the suffering themselves to try to save the marriage for the sake of the child by pretending not to know.Originally posted by SGpork:if she is married to me..
how can i pretend nth happen
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I agree with dokono's stance...the wife will have an unfilled emotional abyss which no matter how well the TS treating her....she'd still be thinking abt her ex lover.Originally posted by dokono:It all started way back before you married her. That's the root of the problem guy.
I think you married the wrong girl. The interest wasn't even there to begin with. When her mind is not whole-heartedly with you, problems will arise. How can she think about you when she doesn't have much interest when you started dating her?
doko
I think the TS can ready for the worst and hope for the best. Good luck -
If there are kids involved, it's better to try save the marriage. This is because ultimately, the victims will be the kids.Originally posted by 798:u will be surprise dat some guys prefer to bear the suffering themselves to try to save the marriage for the sake of the child by pretending not to know.
doko -
That's the problem with many guys. Many are in a rush to get married and forgot to see if the girl has any feeling for them in the beginning. If she doesn't don't go after her anymore. She must like you from the start and likes your style.Originally posted by Mid9Sun:I agree with dokono's stance...the wife will have an unfilled emotional abyss which no matter how well the TS treating her....she'd still be thinking abt her ex lover.
I think the TS can ready for the worst and hope for the best. Good luck
But many beg and wait, hoping she will change her mind or heart.
haiz..
doko -
Originally posted by Eric Cartman:bargain for rights to like another woman
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Hi,Originally posted by dokono:That's the problem with many guys. Many are in a rush to get married and forgot to see if the girl has any feeling for them in the beginning. If she doesn't don't go after her anymore. She must like you from the start and likes your style.
But many beg and wait, hoping she will change her mind or heart.
haiz..
doko
So do you expect some gal to drop from the sky and like the guy from the start as that guy is the only male she saw and no one else?
The trend is too many youngsters started dating at a very young age. For a girl by the age 28-30 (if she is not married), she would probably gone through a few serious relationships and breakups. By then if the next available guy comes along and gives the least heartache, she might agree to settle down with him....and usually this effect is coupled with the persistence of the guy even though she might not like him from the start. Maybe can ask how old is civicster's wife when they tie the knot.
People cannot change the trend.
Most important is since a couple has sworn their oath, they should move on and build their future with each other. -
sorry but to ask u one question, did you neglect her after you got married? Start reflecting on what you might have done & confirm what you have written is true, never ever jump to conclusions or it'll be disasterous. Take care manOriginally posted by civicster:Hi all...What would you do if you found out that your wife likes another man even though she is married to you. To pretend noting ever happen or confront her? But somehow you will feel very upset about it. Would appriciate your inputs.
Regards