agony workmate.
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i am in bad agony, what dou do in situation like me, should i go yoga, meditation or going crazy. i am even thinking of resigning from my job, ok all my bosses at my workplace is so incredibly nice and very super nice ppl except for 1 woman (she is not a boss, just an employee), but she acted like she is the boss in the place, so so terribly demanding, bossy and very very poisonous. the moment she open her mouth she hurts ppl and me. no one can stand her but everyone act nice to her cos don't want toruble. but she is a real troublemaker, she don't care who u r, and she scold u , bring u down like shit. she is forever exploding the worse she never care yr feelings and make a fool of u,she always thought all ppl are stupid, and she is the most genious person. the moement she step in office, the whole place sulks, i don't find feel peace anymore, she do anything she want, she take advantage of ppl like me and make hell of my time at work. i feel so stress until i can't sleep and focus. i am still here cos myboss are good. she always take advantage and ask me to do stupid things, and u can't say a word or she jump over u like a mad dog. i am so distress in agony. i am even th inking of resigning. i don't want to be her slave anymore. i don't know why so many ppl is giving her so much face , just becos our dept all bosses are nice.
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why don't you tell your bosses about her?
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i don't think much help, cos alot of ppl kena by her and told boss but she is still as strong as iron. she make so many ppl life pain and yet she survive with all that, the worse u tell bosss, she kick a big fuss and matter got worse and what else can be done?Originally posted by Deportivo:why don't you tell your bosses about her? -
Get the HR in intervene and get a restraint on her...Originally posted by alba:i don't think much help, cos alot of ppl kena by her and told boss but she is still as strong as iron. she make so many ppl life pain and yet she survive with all that, the worse u tell bosss, she kick a big fuss and matter got worse and what else can be done?
If she acts back or hit back, the restraint would serve a pre-warning and justified for further actions... -
is her name, may?
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no use, she got so many times with HR , HR also cannot do anything, complains directed to HR abt her, but no action taken, maybe boss too kind so she is so lucky, she always got away, that is why she is big headed.Originally posted by dork3d:Get the HR in intervene and get a restraint on her...
If she acts back or hit back, the restraint would serve a pre-warning and justified for further actions... -
So you have an incompetent HR unit...Originally posted by alba:no use, she got so many times with HR , HR also cannot do anything, complains directed to HR abt her, but no action taken, maybe boss too kind so she is so lucky, she always got away, that is why she is big headed.
Like what you've said, she's probably big-headed over things that bosses and HR also can't do anyhting to her...
In the hierachy of structure, other than your departmental bosses and HR unit, who can make a call of action?
If not, the next wise move would probably be looking for another pasture... -
is it u mean to leave, resign?Originally posted by dork3d:So you have an incompetent HR unit...
Like what you've said, she's probably big-headed over things that bosses and HR also can't do anyhting to her...
In the hierachy of structure, other than your departmental bosses and HR unit, who can make a call of action?
If not, the next wise move would probably be looking for another pasture... -
Avoid her ? When she ask u to do things, can give some excuses to say no.
Observe how other employees shun away from her, then copy their tactics.
Well, from whati see, if u did nothing wrong, she can't do any bad-things to u.
If she keeps on disturbing u, you have to learn to protect urself. There is a line need to be drawn on the sand.
Meanwhile, it is not worthwhile getting urself upset over her cos it is really NOT worthwhile at all! Shift ur focus on your positive co-worker and ur boss. Do your job happily. Don't be bother by such a person!
They are just making life unhappy for themselves. Infact have compassion for them. -
Originally posted by Isis:Avoid her ? When she ask u to do things, can give some excuses to say no.
Observe how other employees shun away from her, then copy their tactics.
Well, from whati see, if u did nothing wrong, she can't do any bad-things to u.
If she keeps on disturbing u, you have to learn to protect urself. There is a line need to be drawn on the sand.
Meanwhile, it is not worthwhile getting urself upset over her cos it is really NOT worthwhile at all! Shift ur focus on your positive co-worker and ur boss. Do your job happily. Don't be bother by such a person!
They are just making life unhappy for themselves. Infact have compassion for them. -
avoid this toxic ppl ,i tried so many times, but they make things so difficult for me, like making me her slave, how am i not to do for her when all she do is to shout at u and make u lose face, or she love to find your fault to attack u and bring u down, this is the most cruelest meaniness being. no one can do anything to them, but they are free to do anything to u, they love to make u feel so small of yourself. she always feel she is the cleverest, beautiful, genious being in this world and she always look down on ppl. she things too hgihly of herself, she treat herself like the CEO, and even CEO also got manners. her manners -0. ppl all got phobia meeting her. she knows everybody is so scared of her and she is proud of that. i don't know why she is enjoying every minute of everything, when ppl are suffering like hell. she love to shout at the top of her voice, and condemn ppl. i find she is the most lowest animal being, she treated ppl like animals or rubbish. she is always waiting and never got intention to help u but intention is to hurt u and find fault on u and purposely she plan it. i did help her alot but too bad she betray me and i just feel now no use to help anymore ppl. i just learned my lesson is never to be good, to anybody.Originally posted by Isis:Avoid her ? When she ask u to do things, can give some excuses to say no.
Observe how other employees shun away from her, then copy their tactics.
Well, from whati see, if u did nothing wrong, she can't do any bad-things to u.
If she keeps on disturbing u, you have to learn to protect urself. There is a line need to be drawn on the sand.
Meanwhile, it is not worthwhile getting urself upset over her cos it is really NOT worthwhile at all! Shift ur focus on your positive co-worker and ur boss. Do your job happily. Don't be bother by such a person!
They are just making life unhappy for themselves. Infact have compassion for them. -
i do have compassion for them, i treated them so nicely, helped them like a slave and in the end they betrayed me and treat me like shit. i learn this lesson that never be good to anybody anymore. no use to make ppl happy.Originally posted by Isis:Avoid her ? When she ask u to do things, can give some excuses to say no.
Observe how other employees shun away from her, then copy their tactics.
Well, from whati see, if u did nothing wrong, she can't do any bad-things to u.
If she keeps on disturbing u, you have to learn to protect urself. There is a line need to be drawn on the sand.
Meanwhile, it is not worthwhile getting urself upset over her cos it is really NOT worthwhile at all! Shift ur focus on your positive co-worker and ur boss. Do your job happily. Don't be bother by such a person!
They are just making life unhappy for themselves. Infact have compassion for them. -
in work, its sometimes war zone.
so u reli need to strengthen ur immune system and fight back.
if this job reli gives u the satisfaction or wad u wan, u need to sustain it.
no point giving up just bcoz of one bad egg.
if u r a soft person, u r bound to be bullied, sorry to say tat.
u need to be fierce n roar. -
Hey TS.
I'm sure you have a solution yourself. If someone is posting here about the same problem you have, If you spend some time to think, you can too provide many solutions. You are as capable a human being as any other person here.
The problem lies with YOU.
There are only 2 roles in any hostile situation. The Aggressor and the Victim.
You choose to be the Victim.
Forumers here are posting suggestions to aid you. You kept giving reasons that they're not-workable. Think about it.
If you continue to see yourself as a Victim, no suggestions here or any in self help books can help you.
I'm sure that person don't have issues with everyone in the office, only some. I'm sure that person don't "bullies" everyone equally bad. And if you look hard enough, those who don't get bullied are people who can and will stand their ground, if their lines are crossed.
Imagine today you are the boss. Standing in front of you are two of your staff. Both did a very bad job in a project you tasked them. You are boiling with anger. Would you scold the first staff more,(who will calmly admit his mistake), OR would you scold the second staff more (who will shiver, tremble, looks very scare of you)?
If you choose to be a Victim, naturally you'll attract more "bullies", more "aggressors" in your life, unless of course you choose to be a firmer person.
I'm sure your "Victim" attitude applys not only in your work, but also in your outside life.
Do you do anything at all when the person in front of you let his friend cut into the queue? Fumed angrily inside? -
I will make sure she get slack first..
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biatches like this need to use "silence" attack. when she scolding or yelling, pretend she is invisible..look away from her and in ur serious face/tone, do ur work.
if u appear weak or loud like herself, she will eat u up
One plus point, she aint ur boss. why scared of her. -
Oh my....my working environ is almost like dat. Everyone is nice, except for one garbage bin face, who is going to be my new superior. Really feel so sianz.Yoga apparently did not help...but doing body combat did hahaha.
Anyways Option 1: Quit . Its just not worth it . There is no way the woman will change lor. Option2: Be fierce too and stoop to her level
I told Boss, but his opinion is " That is your own F$%$% problem". Watever!
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how to be firmer, fierce i am not used to scolding anyone or shouting, yelling bringing down the morale, they r bitches, whtat is why they can shout, yell and swear, but me, i normally don't do that, do i hv to do that? i am not ready yet, it is so shame not able to control myself. i've not reach that level yet, i do hope it will happen. i don't know why i hate that bully, each time hear her voice, make my hair stand. and is stressing me.how not to be victim of bully? is it to show dog face?Originally posted by airgrinder:Hey TS.
I'm sure you have a solution yourself. If someone is posting here about the same problem you have, If you spend some time to think, you can too provide many solutions. You are as capable a human being as any other person here.
The problem lies with YOU.
There are only 2 roles in any hostile situation. The Aggressor and the Victim.
You choose to be the Victim.
Forumers here are posting suggestions to aid you. You kept giving reasons that they're not-workable. Think about it.
If you continue to see yourself as a Victim, no suggestions here or any in self help books can help you.
I'm sure that person don't have issues with everyone in the office, only some. I'm sure that person don't "bullies" everyone equally bad. And if you look hard enough, those who don't get bullied are people who can and will stand their ground, if their lines are crossed.
Imagine today you are the boss. Standing in front of you are two of your staff. Both did a very bad job in a project you tasked them. You are boiling with anger. Would you scold the first staff more,(who will calmly admit his mistake), OR would you scold the second staff more (who will shiver, tremble, looks very scare of you)?
If you choose to be a Victim, naturally you'll attract more "bullies", more "aggressors" in your life, unless of course you choose to be a firmer person.
I'm sure your "Victim" attitude applys not only in your work, but also in your outside life.
Do you do anything at all when the person in front of you let his friend cut into the queue? Fumed angrily inside? -
Hmm...Usually females that exhibited this kind of behaviour are those sexually frustrated one that are in their 30s or just turn 30 who don't even have a boyfriend. So, help her get a man friend and you will find peace at workOriginally posted by alba:i am in bad agony, what dou do in situation like me, should i go yoga, meditation or going crazy. i am even thinking of resigning from my job, ok all my bosses at my workplace is so incredibly nice and very super nice ppl except for 1 woman (she is not a boss, just an employee), but she acted like she is the boss in the place, so so terribly demanding, bossy and very very poisonous. the moment she open her mouth she hurts ppl and me. no one can stand her but everyone act nice to her cos don't want toruble. but she is a real troublemaker, she don't care who u r, and she scold u , bring u down like shit. she is forever exploding the worse she never care yr feelings and make a fool of u,she always thought all ppl are stupid, and she is the most genious person. the moement she step in office, the whole place sulks, i don't find feel peace anymore, she do anything she want, she take advantage of ppl like me and make hell of my time at work. i feel so stress until i can't sleep and focus. i am still here cos myboss are good. she always take advantage and ask me to do stupid things, and u can't say a word or she jump over u like a mad dog. i am so distress in agony. i am even th inking of resigning. i don't want to be her slave anymore. i don't know why so many ppl is giving her so much face , just becos our dept all bosses are nice.
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Oh hey my sympathies are with you.
But lemme ask u this. since u r prepared to resign over such a person...why dont u try making her life difficult for you in your last days ?
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Come up with a petition to show to your bosses.
You could even paste it on the pantry walls if you really hate her. -
Originally posted by FocusPoint:Hmm...Usually females that exhibited this kind of behaviour are those sexually frustrated one that are in their 30s or just turn 30 who don't even have a boyfriend. So, help her get a man friend and you will find peace at work
maybe u r right, u r so right, true. it could be. i may agree with that. what a pity! -
to beat a dog, u have to be a dog.
or a boss. -
Hi TS, I am still not quite sure why you are being dominated by her, since both of you have equal standing in the office.
I know how you feel when people scream their heads at you. You are too kind to shout back and shouting back does not seem your kind of personality.
True ladies dun act like mad dogs.
Anyway, when she shout at you , wun ur colleagues look at her or no one stands up for you or smthg? That is really weird.
You dun have to listen to her actually. Just ignore .Anyway, quitting your job over this person is definately not worth it. Esp your boss also dun reali care.
Im more jialat ar. Im working and living with this girl i super cannot clique. Buay tahan.. but how? we're overseas for training and we have not been talking or comin to work together.. We are like.. bad terms until so jialat.
Im okie with not talking to her, but im just worried my boss will be unhappy that we are on bad terms. See.. i wan to ignore her also have my worries ar.
So as long as your boss cant be bothered , den U just start ignoring her. Treat her as INVIsible.. smile! anyway you only see her durin office hrs ma.. -
Hey alba,
You're not alone there. I am in the same situation at the moment.... the worse thing is the ranking is different. The person is my new project manager. Ever since she came on board, we had 4 resignations.
In a way, I have been considering to resign too but hey, why should I? I will play along until I think there's no more opportunity for me in the company.
Everywhere you go, there will always be people like that. Don't let them make you lose a good job with good opportunity.
In your situation, since she's not your boss, just stand up for yourself. Ignore her, let her bark like a mad dog as much as she wants. When people start ignoring her and stop giving in to her "command", she will soon learn to shut up.
All the best there and cheer up eh!!