Finally broke up..why m still so devastated?
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He is just trying to make you feel guilty. Don't bother to explain to him, enough to know it yourself that you are never to blame. He blames you for leaving him for a third party, you yourself know that is not true, so why worry about an accusation which can't even be proven right?Originally posted by kuri:it's so painful suffering in silence..to hav almost everybody think i m in the wrong even tho i gave my all...the most heartbreaking of all he thinks i m leaving him for a third party..which is not true.i want so much to explain to him but i cant..if i reply him or answer his call it will never end..yet it hurts so much to hav him think that i betrayed him..i really loved him i nvr did him any wrong n i would nvr do that..i just wish he could know..the struggle i face everytime i see his smses..it's killing me...
I think he knows you never betrayed him, he just said what he said to make you feel guilty and to make him feel better. He wants you to suffer. Show him that you are stronger than that. -
I do not wish to say much cos everything i say will be useless unless you start to wake up.Originally posted by kuri:it's so painful suffering in silence..to hav almost everybody think i m in the wrong even tho i gave my all...the most heartbreaking of all he thinks i m leaving him for a third party..which is not true.i want so much to explain to him but i cant..if i reply him or answer his call it will never end..yet it hurts so much to hav him think that i betrayed him..i really loved him i nvr did him any wrong n i would nvr do that..i just wish he could know..the struggle i face everytime i see his smses..it's killing me...
You are still new to relationship thats why you take it so hard on yourself. -
sorry hor hijack abit.Originally posted by rainee:He is just trying to make you feel guilty. Don't bother to explain to him, enough to know it yourself that you are never to blame. He blames you for leaving him for a third party, you yourself know that is not true, so why worry about an accusation which can't even be proven right?
I think he knows you never betrayed him, he just said what he said to make you feel guilty and to make him feel better. He wants you to suffer. Show him that you are stronger than that.
btw rainee hows rin doing? -
He is doing alright, though now trying to find a jobOriginally posted by zeny:sorry hor hijack abit.
btw rainee hows rin doing?
I just met him yesterday 
Do you know him personally?
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Read my sigg..Originally posted by kuri:it's so painful suffering in silence..to hav almost everybody think i m in the wrong even tho i gave my all...the most heartbreaking of all he thinks i m leaving him for a third party..which is not true.i want so much to explain to him but i cant..if i reply him or answer his call it will never end..yet it hurts so much to hav him think that i betrayed him..i really loved him i nvr did him any wrong n i would nvr do that..i just wish he could know..the struggle i face everytime i see his smses..it's killing me... -
Do you know him personally?Originally posted by rainee:He is doing alright, though now trying to find a job I just met him yesterday
Do you know him personally?
winks winks -
hmm...i tink i mite know who you are...Originally posted by zeny:Do you know him personally?
winks winks
PM me your real identity lehz -
the money issue is making the breakup more complicated..i m willing to let most go but need some back to get on with my life..his family made me sms him that i dun need money back from him anymore cos they scared he will borrow ah long to return me..but they said they hav to investigate before they can return me money for him..alr tried my best to give them wat evidence or statements i hav..i understand their perspective but i dunno how long this gona take..feels so stuck rite now..as if getting over the breakup is not difficult enough i hav to b in such a mess..it is so exhuasting..
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I don't know how much he owes you.Originally posted by kuri:the money issue is making the breakup more complicated..i m willing to let most go but need some back to get on with my life..his family made me sms him that i dun need money back from him anymore cos they scared he will borrow ah long to return me..but they said they hav to investigate before they can return me money for him..alr tried my best to give them wat evidence or statements i hav..i understand their perspective but i dunno how long this gona take..feels so stuck rite now..as if getting over the breakup is not difficult enough i hav to b in such a mess..it is so exhuasting..
But for my previous ex. He borrowed 5k from me before the break-up.
Your case and mine is very very similar.
My ex controlled and manipulated me the way your guy did with you.
We actually broke off before the money thing. I was the one who break off with him.
But he sweet talked me into patching back with him again.
Later on he admitted that he just want to patch back with me so that he can dump me.
I never see my money again, he refused to admit to his family he borrowed money from me. His family is quite well off and own several properties.
But during one of our meeting which he promised to settle the debt, he scolded me and told me the 5K was to recoup some loss what he had invested in me. He called me a whore for leaving him for someone else.
In the end, his arss shit behaviour made it easier for me to drop this guy outa my mind. I am now a much much happier person with a much happier life.
As for my money, I earned it back by now.
It was a very painful lesson I went through, thank God I survived it. -
Freaking asshole threatened me that he wants revenge.he says an eye for an eye wanna give back some of the hell i gave him.then later say what want to put things at my house door.now on msn say he is backstabbed by a bitch he's in a killing frenzy.i just blocked n deleted him.i didnt want to make things bad a breakup doesnt need to end viciously but wtf is he trying to do.he wants to drive me to make police report then he can deepen his hate for me n plot my murder in the prison cell is it?omg mega fooked-up loser.i told myself today is the last day i cry cos of him he's really darn not worth it.to think i still cared so much bout him after breakup cos we were once so close now he's wat fook giving me threats?lousy coward.haih.darn why did i hav to meet him.
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Now you finally see his true colour..It's time to move on
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singaporean guys are good in all talk, no actionOriginally posted by kuri:Freaking asshole threatened me that he wants revenge.he says an eye for an eye wanna give back some of the hell i gave him.then later say what want to put things at my house door.now on msn say he is backstabbed by a bitch he's in a killing frenzy.i just blocked n deleted him.i didnt want to make things bad a breakup doesnt need to end viciously but wtf is he trying to do.he wants to drive me to make police report then he can deepen his hate for me n plot my murder in the prison cell is it?omg mega fooked-up loser.i told myself today is the last day i cry cos of him he's really darn not worth it.to think i still cared so much bout him after breakup cos we were once so close now he's wat fook giving me threats?lousy coward.haih.darn why did i hav to meet him.
he's only angry la, dun care him.
sooner of later he'll ask u for forgiveness 1, u see.
and don't cry
tears from a woman only makes yourself frail. -
Good lord Kuri, he sounds exactly like my ex !Originally posted by kuri:Freaking asshole threatened me that he wants revenge.he says an eye for an eye wanna give back some of the hell i gave him.then later say what want to put things at my house door.now on msn say he is backstabbed by a bitch he's in a killing frenzy.i just blocked n deleted him.i didnt want to make things bad a breakup doesnt need to end viciously but wtf is he trying to do.he wants to drive me to make police report then he can deepen his hate for me n plot my murder in the prison cell is it?omg mega fooked-up loser.i told myself today is the last day i cry cos of him he's really darn not worth it.to think i still cared so much bout him after breakup cos we were once so close now he's wat fook giving me threats?lousy coward.haih.darn why did i hav to meet him.
Is his name start with P ?? Heaven forbids they are the same person
Now is NOT the time to show fear or back down.
Go to the police station and make a police report.
If you still have a copy of the msn, print a copy and include in the report.
The report should also include all his particulars.
Get a copy of the report and email it to your ex.
Tell him, if any thing happen to you, he will be the first one police comes after.
Don't be afraid of this kind of person, they thrive on your fear.
Get your friends and relatives to accompany you incase he stalks you.
You gota make him know that you are not the person to thrifle with.
If he gives you hell, you can give him back 10 folds. -
No Giga,Originally posted by gigabyte14:singaporean guys are good in all talk, no action
he's only angry la, dun care him.
sooner of later he'll ask u for forgiveness 1, u see.
and don't cry
tears from a woman only makes yourself frail.
There are arss ho guys like these around.
They cannot tahan being dump.
So they seek revenge with threats and fear.
I've seen many and experienced a few personally.
When they know you are fearful they feel powerful.
If you don't fight back they will not stop because they believe you are afraid of them. -
i think u love him. give him time to change, like 12 months or more. clear ur mind...there r other guys. if u still love him despite they r other guys with better criteria etc...then u know wat to do.
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he wants immediate answers..even if i still love him i cant patch with him now his behaviour n everything doesnt give me confidence we can overcome the too many obstacles we hav..n he really hurt me so bad..one day show remorse the next back to asshole stunts n he just smsed me two days ago "u can do watever u want with other guys.it doesnt affect me anymore".my heart wept when i saw that.i dun think he'd wait for me.n the way he's treating me now i m not sure i shd wait for him or shd i just convince myself to give up altogether hate him if i hav to do that.Originally posted by curryman:i think u love him. give him time to change, like 12 months or more. clear ur mind...there r other guys. if u still love him despite they r other guys with better criteria etc...then u know wat to do.
dunno how i got so sad i m like bumping ard everyday just feels so disorientated now.. -
You feel disorientated coz you have not make your decision yet.Originally posted by kuri:he wants immediate answers..even if i still love him i cant patch with him now his behaviour n everything doesnt give me confidence we can overcome the too many obstacles we hav..n he really hurt me so bad..one day show remorse the next back to asshole stunts n he just smsed me two days ago "u can do watever u want with other guys.it doesnt affect me anymore".my heart wept when i saw that.i dun think he'd wait for me.n the way he's treating me now i m not sure i shd wait for him or shd i just convince myself to give up altogether hate him if i hav to do that.
dunno how i got so sad i m like bumping ard everyday just feels so disorientated now..
Ask yourself one question: Are you in pain now?
If you are, then the next question is: How do ppl treat their pain? Do you intend to stop the pain by applying treatment to it or you rather gain immune to the pain and do nothing about it?
Maybe, you are just indignant about the time and love that you spent on him. Read back your posts and think again if he is worth your time again. -
na... kuri, don't even think of going back to him... you have already taken the first steps to freedom... if u give in now... you'll only suffer more in the future...Originally posted by kuri:he wants immediate answers..even if i still love him i cant patch with him now his behaviour n everything doesnt give me confidence we can overcome the too many obstacles we hav..n he really hurt me so bad..one day show remorse the next back to asshole stunts n he just smsed me two days ago "u can do watever u want with other guys.it doesnt affect me anymore".my heart wept when i saw that.i dun think he'd wait for me.n the way he's treating me now i m not sure i shd wait for him or shd i just convince myself to give up altogether hate him if i hav to do that.
dunno how i got so sad i m like bumping ard everyday just feels so disorientated now..
sigh, this is one thing i can't stand of men!! why do they have to borrow money from their gf?! my 2 ex were like that too!!
sigh!! money issues really complicate break ups.... that's why when i decided to break off... i have already considered my 5k a loss cause...
kuri, be mentally prepared to lose that money...
the disorientation that you are feeling now is natural... it's called getting used to singlehood...
when u are a couple, you have this knowledge that no matter what happens, however late, however inappropraite the issue/timing, there's always the one person you can call, who will in one way or another be there for u... NOW, you must get used to depending on yourself....
take heart, it's not as bleak as it sounds... cos you still have FRIENDS... which is why i told you to surround yourself with them... they help you to make this transition bearable. -
do some stuff that keeps u busy.. erm and it takes timeOriginally posted by kuri:Finally made a firm break with that asshole...some of u might remb the chastity thread posted a few months ago..things got so bad his family told me to inform them and call police if he ever looks for me again.they asked me to cut off ties with him for their good, for his and for mine.i know he's not worth the heartache but i cant help hurting so badly.i cant take my mind off him the times we hav been thru both good and bad wind up in my head in never ending replays.after so much torment the breakup should be a relief,why m i still so devastated?could barely go to sleep and barely have the strength to get out of bed...n i m not quite sure if this is the end of things with all these complications..still cried so hard when he kept sending me msgs ytd nite..i m so mad at myself for feeling this way.so guilty for still missing him.so ashamed of my stupidity.how do i recover...i just want to get me back.. -
i m upset bcos i made the mistake of getting together with him.
i m even more upset why i still hav feelings for him and/or care for what he thinks bout me.
like now he just smsed me "want to hav dinner together this evening?"i told him i dunno wat time i'd b free got to bring rabbit to see vet later then he replied me "forget it then u so heartless" i felt hurt.a few mins later wat "let me know wat time ur free i wait for u." then this second pushing for an answer "do u really want to give it all up?let me know the ans now."
i m sick of hs manipulation.
i am upset at him for treating me this way and i m even more upset at myself for still feeling hurt n worse,still having feelings for him. -
Have you ever wondered why he is treating you like that? The first thought that came to my mind is that you allowed him to treat you this way.Originally posted by kuri:i m upset bcos i made the mistake of getting together with him.
i m even more upset why i still hav feelings for him and/or care for what he thinks bout me.
like now he just smsed me "want to hav dinner together this evening?"i told him i dunno wat time i'd b free got to bring rabbit to see vet later then he replied me "forget it then u so heartless" i felt hurt.a few mins later wat "let me know wat time ur free i wait for u." then this second pushing for an answer "do u really want to give it all up?let me know the ans now."
i m sick of hs manipulation.
i am upset at him for treating me this way and i m even more upset at myself for still feeling hurt n worse,still having feelings for him.
If you are really thinking of breaking up with him totally, I do not think you will even bothered to sms him your reason why you might not be free later. Maybe, you do not want to appear as a heartless person, but, by doing so, you are subjecting yourself and him to more hurt.
When a person really wants to have a breakup, he/she will do so in a heartless manner. The reason is not to let themselves have a chance to become softhearted again.
I am sorry to say that if you continue to do things like that, then, you deserved the outcome. -
I have to agree with ILPSY here.
if u really want him fo give up for good....
Let him think that u are a bitch.
ignore his sms, do not reply.
if he wan to scold u just ignore. u have to realise that he's hurting now, he's licking his own wounds and lashing out at you out of spite... but the more u reply him, the more u show u care, the longer u are letting this drag,Originally posted by ILPSY:Have you ever wondered why he is treating you like that? The first thought that came to my mind is that you allowed him to treat you this way.
If you are really thinking of breaking up with him totally, I do not think you will even bothered to sms him your reason why you might not be free later. Maybe, you do not want to appear as a heartless person, but, by doing so, you are subjecting yourself and him to more hurt.
When a person really wants to have a breakup, he/she will do so in a heartless manner. The reason is not to let themselves have a chance to become softhearted again.
I am sorry to say that if you continue to do things like that, then, you deserved the outcome. -
You want you can tell him to give you some space during this break up period. Actually you should tell YOURSELF to make space for yourself. Meaning whatever he smsed, called, emailed or mailed to youOriginally posted by kuri:i m upset bcos i made the mistake of getting together with him.
i m even more upset why i still hav feelings for him and/or care for what he thinks bout me.
like now he just smsed me "want to hav dinner together this evening?"i told him i dunno wat time i'd b free got to bring rabbit to see vet later then he replied me "forget it then u so heartless" i felt hurt. a few mins later wat "let me know wat time ur free i wait for u." then this second pushing for an answer "do u really want to give it all up?let me know the ans now."
i m sick of hs manipulation.
i am upset at him for treating me this way and i m even more upset at myself for still feeling hurt n worse,still having feelings for him.
DO NOT READ, REPLY OR EVEN RECONSIDER READING.
Its your choice really. But you do know what will happen to you should you reply to him at this moment right? -
kuri, the fact that u can't get over him is because in ur world, he is still the guy u used to know. now, it's OVER. he's no longer the person u used to have good times with. those memories have faded away with the wind.
right now, u have a devil to deal with. deal with it bravely as u move on with ur life. there are many great guys out there who may want to know u. give urself some chances after u recover from this hurricane.
i wish u all the best.
cheers