Can anyone Advise? Thanks alot
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Aiya...why bother her at all....
Let her be since she's so selfish n arrogant towards her hubby...
Look, she won't follow/change for her hubby but expect her hubby to follow/change for her...Dunno why she wanna get married...wanna show off? (What's there to show off anyway?
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Luckily they got no kids (poor kids, if they do have...got mother machiam got no mother, got father machaim like got many fathers..)....Maybe can fcuk this thread to the newspapers or TV for Singaporeans' discussion... -
I wonder what happened if one day, this Finland guy bed-ed her and she can claimed that it's alright and ok and her hubby shld accept her as she's not wrong becoz he hardly has any time for her (Of coz, she's also "Busy", no time for him)...so, she's not wrong to go out n fcuk with other guys...coz hubby got no time to satisfy her...
damn...her hubby shld also do the same as her....shld go out with girls overseas... -
If you were to conduct a statistical survey by asking the respondents (must be married women) on whether they agreed with the thought processes of mikki 1980, I believe that the result will show the majority will say "disagree".
I wish mikki all the best & hope she will live happily ever after. -
We never asked her an to assume that is very wrong... people not only do not know everything, what people know in their heads is at best inaccurate.Originally posted by jojobeach:Yeah... ?
So far, she never once posted she has feelings for her husband.
So far, she never once ask about sustaining the relationship.
So far, it seems she doesn't even love her husband. Not anymore it seems.
All I can say is that she probably has different values from the "average" Singaporean... but for you to assume that "the average Singaporean values" are "right" and "the best" and everyone in this world should embody these "average Singaporean values" is nonsense.Originally posted by jojobeach:From her postings, she was merely here to garner some validation for her behaviour.
Fortunately, nobody agrees with her selfish thinking.
So far she believes that she is still right.
There is such a thing call " Extra Marital Affair".. she don't seem to understand what it means......because she thinks it's OK to go travel with another guy because she is already married....and she claims to be a U grad......
I rather not give advice in terms of values, religious or otherwise but to point out to her the consequences... which apparently she knows well enough.
There is no need to "condemn" her.
Just tell her what she should do and that is... compromise her position so as to accommodate her husband's feelings... without sacrificing her own happiness and the way she finds her happiness. Not easy but can be done. -
So what? At one time people thought that slavery was right. At one time people thought that women are inferior... hahaha some people still think that... so even if you get 100% agreement does not make something "right".Originally posted by richong 3216:If you were to conduct a statistical survey by asking the respondents (must be married women) on whether they agreed with the thought processes of mikki 1980, I believe that the result will show the majority will say "disagree".
I wish mikki all the best & hope she will live happily ever after. -
Once again I have to disagree with that. Its not the "Singaporean way" ask any one person regardless of what country they are from and they will give you the same thing, its not right for someone(married person) to plan a holiday with another guy/girl friend (one that the husband/wife dosen't know) without telling the husband/wife first.Originally posted by AndrewPKYap:All I can say is that she probably has different values from the "average" Singaporean... but for you to assume that "the average Singaporean values" are "right" and "the best" and everyone in this world should embody these "average Singaporean values" is nonsense.
The TS feels that her husband is unreasonable to get mad at her for doing that. Some how I dun think so........ otherwise why is she feeling guilty if the believes so strongly that she has not done anything wrong ?? -
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There are those who wants to believe such that it is beneficial to themself.
And there are those who seek to understand the sufferings of others. -
Originally posted by MiX Metal:
You are suggesting that she does not want any advice and she is simply taking a "Poll" to see how many people "agrees" or "disagrees" that her husband is right to "get mad" at her for her behavior?
Once again I have to disagree with that. Its not the "Singaporean way" ask any one person regardless of what country they are from and they will give you the same thing, its not right for someone[b](married person) to plan a holiday with another guy/girl friend (one that the husband/wife dosen't know) without telling the husband/wife first.
The TS feels that her husband is unreasonable to get mad at her for doing that. Some how I dun think so........ otherwise why is she feeling guilty if the believes so strongly that she has not done anything wrong ?? [/b]
That if more people agrees with her husband then she will change her ways and if more people disagrees then she will continue?
OK Let's ask her...
TS, "mikki1980" are you simply taking a poll? -
How different can a human's values be from each other.Originally posted by AndrewPKYap:All I can say is that she probably has different values from the "average" Singaporean... but for you to assume that "the average Singaporean values" are "right" and "the best" and everyone in this world should embody these "average Singaporean values" is nonsense.
I rather not give advice in terms of values, religious or otherwise but to point out to her the consequences... which apparently she knows well enough.
There is no need to "condemn" her.
Just tell her what she should do and that is... compromise her position so as to accommodate her husband's feelings... without sacrificing her own happiness and the way she finds her happiness. Not easy but can be done.
Unless she is from the Amazon. Unless she is from one of those polygamy cult.
Unless she grew up in a family so vastly different from the norm.
I have friends from many countries, they will not tolerate this kind of values that she so believes to be acceptable.
She's only lying to herself. -
Somehow I doubt you'll get a answer.Originally posted by AndrewPKYap:You are suggesting that she does not want any advice and she is simply taking a "Poll" to see how many people "agrees" or "disagrees" that her husband is right to "get mad" at her for her behavior?
That if more people agrees with her husband then she will change her ways and if more people disagrees then she will continue?
OK Let's ask her...
TS, "mikki1980" are you simply taking a poll?
As the TS said herself, she come from a well to do family, so she's most likely been having everything her way, mummy and daddy's little girl. Refused to accept the fact that when you tie the knot, there are things that we'll have adjust to in order for it to work out. -
No need "Amazon..." and "one of those polygamy cult."Originally posted by jojobeach:How different can a human's values be from each other.
Unless she is from the Amazon. Unless she is from one of those polygamy cult.
Unless she grew up in a family so vastly different from the norm.
I have friends from many countries, they will not tolerate this kind of values that she so believes to be acceptable.
She's only lying to herself.
Just take a walk around Geylang and you will see men AND women with very different values from you.
If you say: "Those people in Geylang... they are reckless because they might catch STD or AIDS"
That is to me completely acceptable.
If you say: "Those people in Geylang... they are EVIL"
hahahahaha, it is not your place to judge... you have limited knowledge and your brain, like everyone's brain is not perfect. -
You assume too much and take too much pride in yourself... I suggest that you cannot know her simply from her postings in this thread. Heaven knows that you cannot know perfectly those people you are living with... even if you think you do....Originally posted by MiX Metal:Somehow I doubt you'll get a answer.
As the TS said herself, she come from a well to do family, so she's most likely been having everything her way, mummy and daddy's little girl. Refused to accept the fact that when you tie the knot, there are things that we'll have adjust to in order for it to work out. -
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nope ! I dun take too much pride in myself. always open to other people's remarksOriginally posted by AndrewPKYap:You assume too much and take too much pride in yourself... I suggest that you cannot know her simply from her postings in this thread. Heaven knows that you cannot know perfectly those people you are living with... even if you think you do....
question is are u ?? -
what I think and what you think is our own problem... we cannot impose our "thoughts" onto others...Originally posted by jojobeach:So, you think it is ok for married men or women to visit vice ? -
but but but... you gave an analysis of what you think she is wat.... I never wat... I only say you assume too much and why you dare assume so much? Not because you think too highly of yourself meh?Originally posted by MiX Metal:nope ! I dun take too much pride in myself. always open to other people's remarks
question is are u ?? Than what? -
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Thats the only thing I can do in a forum, I do not know the TS. What I can do is voice out what i feel base on what she has written. I'm not forcing her to accept everything that I've said. Have I ever said that ??Originally posted by AndrewPKYap:but but but... you gave an analysis of what you think she is wat.... I never wat... I only say you assume too much and why you dare assume so much? Not because you think too highly of yourself meh? Than what?
My dear Andrew you are doing the same to me as well after reading what I've written you analysis me as someone that takes much pride in myself so I am right to say that u are as well someone that take too much pride in yourself ??????
Ask yourself this. -
Of course I am avoiding your question... I am not in AA to ask for your help... if you haven't notice...Originally posted by jojobeach:You are avoiding my question.
It is true your thoughts are yours... care to share ?
I seek not to impose my thoughts.. curiousity kills the cat, but the pandora box is always the temptress for our human soul.
If you are given to wild imaginings, then imagine all you want lor....
Just a word of advice... live in reality. -
Can I please get you guys/gals stick to the topic and discuss your "disagreement" via pm if possible? I will have to close this thread if you continue to do so.
Thanks!
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I am saying that in order for someone to judge another person... that person must "trust" his own "opinions" and "knowledge" and "analysis"Originally posted by MiX Metal:Thats the only thing I can do in a forum, I do not know the TS. What I can do is voice out what i feel base on what she has written. I'm not forcing her to accept everything that I've said. Have I ever said that ??
My dear Andrew you are doing the same to me as well after reading what I've written you analysis me as someone that takes much pride in myself so I am right to say that u are as well someone that take too much pride in yourself as well ??????
Ask yourself this.
He must trust his own human brain. Hello, in case this is news to use... the human brain is deficient and not reliable all the time.... people do not and cannot have complete knowledge....
I am not saying that you are a "proud" person per se... I am just making the observation that people that like to "judge" others take too much pride in themselves and their abilities and their brain...
There is another way and that is, not judge. -
Thanks for the gentle reminder.... I submitted my last post before I saw your post hor... so don't think I am trying to defy you...Originally posted by honeymouse:Can I please get you guys/gals stick to the topic and discuss your "disagreement" via pm if possible? I will have to close this thread if you continue to do so.
Thanks! -
I'm not judging her andrew,Originally posted by AndrewPKYap:I am saying that in order for someone to judge another person... that person must "trust" his own "opinions" and "knowledge" and "analysis"
He must trust his own human brain. Hello, in case this is news to use... the human brain is deficient and not reliable all the time.... people do not and cannot have complete knowledge....
I am not saying that you are a "proud" person per se... I am just making the observation that people that like to "judge" others take too much pride in themselves and their abilities and their brain...
There is another way and that is, not judge.
Are u judging me ? (joking)
I myself dun like to be judge so I don't judged others as well ...... anyways this has turn into more of a debate rather than people giving advise.
Better get back on track. -
Originally posted by AndrewPKYap:Thanks for the gentle reminder.... I submitted my last post before I saw your post hor... so don't think I am trying to defy you...
Thanks!!!Originally posted by MiX Metal:I'm not judging her andrew,
Are u judging me ? (joking)
I myself dun like to be judge so I don't judged others as well ...... anyways this has turn into more of a debate rather than people giving advise.
Better get back on track.