broke n depressed..
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still sloughing for the bank accs asshole emptied..after so much hard work i managed to fill in what i urgently needed but my main acc is still pretty empty cos i aint gg to get any allowances anymore so need to sustain myself..just got scolded by dad for not gg to the doc cos i m sick i din want to waste the money i think i'd b fine after a while but he said thats my way of protesting the discontinuation of allowances wat cant y i understand his situation. haih i m not even complaining to him, who understands mine.
my ex classmates 21st bdays r comin.. one of them my few other ex-classmates say wanna get nintendo ds for her count me in told 'em i broke they say nvm i pay by instalment i barely know or even talked to the bday girl man haha reminds me of last yr when my uni mates keep asking me to contribute this n that for ppl's bdays, n even when they bugged me for this kinda contribution just after my bday i said they forgot totally bout bday din even say happy bday to me i tot the person chasing me for the money/contribution wld at least say "sry..happy belated bday" or smt but she just told me "shut up n pay up". may hav a been a totless reaction from her but it hurts my feelings that was the last straw n i decided to distance myself from this bunch of ppl quietly.. almost one yr has past since n now that time for me is much worse than it used to be n everything comes clammering down at me... i feel so disillusioned at the ppl ard me.. who really cares? why do ppl only come to me when they r down or neld help? when they said thank you each time i did smt sweet to them did it mean anything to them at all? even tho i not expecting tangible or calculated returns for what i did its just so pathetic the end of the day nobody even bothers bout how r u kuri r u alrite?
feeling so depressed n lonely..after some frantic job search i just got another new pt job but the basic pay alr zui n i feel so bitter now keep forcing myself to work really feel like giving myself a break before sch starts.. i really wonder what hav i done wrong.. is asshole rite that i had offered frdship n help too unconditional that ppl ard me takes me for granted? but i dun wish to subscribe to my dad n asshole's "ren bu wei ji, tian zhi di mie" kinda worldview.. yet the chill inside me really pricks n hurts so much feels so hollow so disoriented now i dunno wat to do... -
To summarise that, you are going to start school again soon and your dad is not going to be giving you allowance?Originally posted by kuri:still sloughing for the bank accs asshole emptied..after so much hard work i managed to fill in what i urgently needed but my main acc is still pretty empty cos i aint gg to get any allowances anymore so need to sustain myself..just got scolded by dad for not gg to the doc cos i m sick i din want to waste the money i think i'd b fine after a while but he said thats my way of protesting the discontinuation of allowances wat cant y i understand his situation. haih i m not even complaining to him, who understands mine.
my ex classmates 21st bdays r comin.. one of them my other classmates say wanna get nintendo ds for her count me in haha reminds me of last yr when my uni mates keep asking me to contribute this n that for ppl's bdays, n even when they bugged me for this kinda contribution just after my bday i said they forgot totally bout bday din even say happy bday to me i tot the person chasing me for the money/contribution wld at least say "sry..happy belated bday" or smt but she just told me "shut up n pay up". may hav a been a totless reaction from her but it hurts my feelings that was the last straw n i decided to distance myself from this bunch of ppl quietly.. almost one yr has past since n now that time for me is much worse than it used to be n everything comes clammering down at me... i feel so disillusioned at the ppl ard me.. who really cares? why do ppl only come to me when they r down or neld help? when they said thank you each time i did smt sweet to them did it mean anything to them at all? even tho i not expecting tangible or calculated returns for what i did its just so pathetic the end of the day nobody even bothers bout how r u kuri r u alrite?
feeling so depressed n lonely..after some frantic job search i just got another new pt job but the basic pay alr zui n i feel so bitter now keep forcing myself to work really feel like giving myself a break before sch starts.. i really wonder what hav i done wrong.. is asshole rite that i had offered frdship n help too unconditional that ppl ard me takes me for granted? but i dun wish to subscribe to my dad n asshole's "ren bu wei ji, tian zhi di mie" kinda worldview.. yet the chill inside me really pricks n hurts so much feels so hollow so disoriented now i dunno wat to do... -
u still in school? all the fren crap u can jz say no $$$ n not interested... ur dad wans u to learn tat $$$ not easy so u no choice hv to follow on... so if u free to work liao then go ahead... theres freelance jobs around too so its nto all bad...Originally posted by kuri:still sloughing for the bank accs asshole emptied..after so much hard work i managed to fill in what i urgently needed but my main acc is still pretty empty cos i aint gg to get any allowances anymore so need to sustain myself..just got scolded by dad for not gg to the doc cos i m sick i din want to waste the money i think i'd b fine after a while but he said thats my way of protesting the discontinuation of allowances wat cant y i understand his situation. haih i m not even complaining to him, who understands mine.
my ex classmates 21st bdays r comin.. one of them my few other ex-classmates say wanna get nintendo ds for her count me in told 'em i broke they say nvm i pay by instalment i barely know or even talked to the bday girl man haha reminds me of last yr when my uni mates keep asking me to contribute this n that for ppl's bdays, n even when they bugged me for this kinda contribution just after my bday i said they forgot totally bout bday din even say happy bday to me i tot the person chasing me for the money/contribution wld at least say "sry..happy belated bday" or smt but she just told me "shut up n pay up". may hav a been a totless reaction from her but it hurts my feelings that was the last straw n i decided to distance myself from this bunch of ppl quietly.. almost one yr has past since n now that time for me is much worse than it used to be n everything comes clammering down at me... i feel so disillusioned at the ppl ard me.. who really cares? why do ppl only come to me when they r down or neld help? when they said thank you each time i did smt sweet to them did it mean anything to them at all? even tho i not expecting tangible or calculated returns for what i did its just so pathetic the end of the day nobody even bothers bout how r u kuri r u alrite?
feeling so depressed n lonely..after some frantic job search i just got another new pt job but the basic pay alr zui n i feel so bitter now keep forcing myself to work really feel like giving myself a break before sch starts.. i really wonder what hav i done wrong.. is asshole rite that i had offered frdship n help too unconditional that ppl ard me takes me for granted? but i dun wish to subscribe to my dad n asshole's "ren bu wei ji, tian zhi di mie" kinda worldview.. yet the chill inside me really pricks n hurts so much feels so hollow so disoriented now i dunno wat to do... -
haha my dad aint trying to teach me anything in particular still entrenched in his mean-world syndrome n he's just gg broke that's all..i hav accepted a pt job frm sch will help me survive but wont b able to fill in my acc for asshole's debt..life neednt b that hard..but the asshole refused to return me money..i m trying to take up another perm pt job but not sure if i can cope cos i m in yr 3 comin sem le got 2 100% projects mods n i gona pull up my grades after wat happened last sem. i know i m not in such distress as to suffer from starvation n the likes. but life's just got really much suckier than ever dun i warrant some whining time n some understanding frm my family(well cant tell them the truth cant let my parents worry more than they hav to now for that i m bearing with it) n frds? i just hav enough of scoffing its not easy i m trying all i can to move on while being entangled to this mess if u cant help n i m not expecting ppl to cant i hav some encouragement n sensitivity plz?Originally posted by BrUtUs:u still in school? all the fren crap u can jz say no $$$ n not interested... ur dad wans u to learn tat $$$ not easy so u no choice hv to follow on... so if u free to work liao then go ahead... theres freelance jobs around too so its nto all bad... -
tell that @sshole pay up la
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oh well...life is like that, live through it.
maybe you could talk things out. never go for the unfair deal, be cunning and u'll know u have the upperhand. -
Gal,
Its very tough trying to support yourself financially as a student.
I have been there...its a tough & rough road ahead...but you can do it...the kuri that I know never say die...
As for your classmates/schoolmates, just dun care about them...its your money & you have the freedom to choose how you want to spend it on...there is no need to spend it on people whom I don't think can be label as 'friends'...
As for the bastard, I guess there is nothing much you can do to them...
He is the worst of humankind...
P.S: I was going to write he was the worst of my kind...but then...he is human & I am a bear...lol...
I never met a guy who is such a disgrace...cheating a gal's of her money...how despicable can he gets...& he is so much older than you...
I better stop talking...he makes my blood boil...not good for my fur...lol...
Jia you...
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i dun understand why teenagers nowadays spend so much on bday gifts.. even if sharing, $60-$80 each person is considered 'ok wat'. duiz..
frenship cannot be measured by money or gifts.. since u are financially tight, juz heck care them. True frens will understand, true frens will be happy even if they receive a 'happy bday' sms from you.
as for job search... the market is pretty good now.. shouldn't be a prob to find a job if u are not picky.
If u are sick, pls go see a doc.. coz if it gets worse, more money will have to be spent. Money can be earned de.. but without good health, there's a lot of things u can't do. -
Since you said he's a a-hole I doubt he will pay up. I used to lend a lot of money to friends and bunk mates, some of them paid me back while some didn't. I don't mind then because I'm not in need of money at that point of time but things changed in my family and now I'm not getting allowance from my parents. With that little bit of NSF pay I'm actually facing a problem now. HP and INTERNET bills is stacking in my drawer, my insurance and installments of my PC I hardly got any money left when it comes to end of the month.
I sms/call my friends who owe me money and none of them reply and if any, they also give lot of excuses. I can tell you it's easier to borrow money from friends than asking them to pay.
Maybe your dad is right, "Ren bu wei ji, tian zu di mie" when it comes to helping people do think twice as some people are not worth helping.
Well no matter what, please be strong and think of the bright side of life. You're young and you got a promising future, be glad that the jerk is now gone at least you've seen through him, it's not a bad thing afterall. -
Agree with BBB, Health come first.
If your sick, you will spend money to lie on the bed.
Work? i have many lobang as waiter/waitress if you want. PM me if you really need a job badly.
Take care -
my frd's urging me to.. she says get a lawyer to write letter of demand or at least lodge police report if i m really broke n see how i can go from there. she say asshole n family r just bullying me cos they dun think i'd do anything she thinks the longer it drags the more it will affect me i understand where she's comin from n sometimes i also think that mayb i shd try to get my money back by hook or by crook but then again i think of the disruption it has caused to my life when i was chasing him for money..tearing after work when i see his smses wrestling with him n my emotions constantly crying in bed every night till i fall asleep in the wee hrs.Originally posted by yiha093:tell that @sshole pay up la
i know i sound really weak saying all these but i really dunno if i hav the strength to rake everything up. its true its a lot of money esp to me now and it could solve financial woes IF i could get the money back via those means. i m really confused, on one hand i want to just move on n work extra hard at least i'd get myself back to my own feet on the other everytime i think of my unnecessary woes cos of the money he owes me how i wish i can b a tough meanie n do watever it takes to get it back. i gave him opportunities to return me bit by bit even a hundred or two perhaps just fifty bucks at a time but he had failed. i know if i continue to straddle between the two paths for too long i wont make it out at either soon enough. i just needa figure a way to decide then toughen my head n heart to my decision.Originally posted by Simple_Bear:Gal,
Its very tough trying to support yourself financially as a student.
I have been there...its a tough & rough road ahead...but you can do it...the kuri that I know never say die...
As for your classmates/schoolmates, just dun care about them...its your money & you have the freedom to choose how you want to spend it on...there is no need to spend it on people whom I don't think can be label as 'friends'...
As for the bastard, I guess there is nothing much you can do to them...
He is the worst of humankind...
P.S: I was going to write he was the worst of my kind...but then...he is human & I am a bear...lol...
I never met a guy who is such a disgrace...cheating a gal's of her money...how despicable can he gets...& he is so much older than you...
I better stop talking...he makes my blood boil...not good for my fur...lol...
Jia you...
well hallo old pals..neighbourhood's friendliest furball n yj jie's cutie kittie..*huggies*thanks.Originally posted by browniebaobao:i dun understand why teenagers nowadays spend so much on bday gifts.. even if sharing, $60-$80 each person is considered 'ok wat'. duiz..
frenship cannot be measured by money or gifts.. since u are financially tight, juz heck care them. True frens will understand, true frens will be happy even if they receive a 'happy bday' sms from you.
as for job search... the market is pretty good now.. shouldn't be a prob to find a job if u are not picky.
If u are sick, pls go see a doc.. coz if it gets worse, more money will have to be spent. Money can be earned de.. but without good health, there's a lot of things u can't do.
i din know i was this weak i tot i'd b stronger. most of the times when i dwell into it most of the times i will prolly end up more angry with myself than ever or him. i guess i just gona figure which way to go n bite the bullet.
bbb as for the jobsearch part not really i picky but due to the time i can commit as it's my 2nd pt while schooling its rather hard the last offer i got basic pay only 30 per 9-6 work n my frd who worked for the company before their payment might hav a bit prob rather zui rite haha. my frds say tuition good money for undergrad they all swear by it but somehow i just suck at it nvr succeeded thus far mayb cos i was nvr the orthodox learner in sch to begin with so too bad for me on this but i'm still trying to keep a keen lookout for one or two that hav good chances of working out.
en. wo yao jian qiang. wo shi jian qiang de. shen qi *** ***. =) -
Kuri,
1.
Your dad knows about the bad debt to your ex ?
If he does, he's probably very upset you "gave" away the money.
He must think you don't value money so much, that you are willing to part with it so easily.
I got really upset with my mom a few years back when I used to give her a big portion of my income. When I found out she just give away money to her friends in gambling..she claim she just "helping" them as she cannot see them die .......... now I just give her a small token sum.
My money not easy to earn ok. I scrimp and save to make ends meet. How can she just throw away money ?
2.
Next time your "friends" ask you to share the bd present.
Just tell them to count you out. You go get one yourself, more personal this way.
You can decide the amount you want to spend based on the kind of friendship you have with the bday girl/guy.
3.
Girl, you need to take control of your life.
Don't let others control you.
Be street smart. Not just textbook smart.
4.
Protect yourself.. because no one else can do it for you.
This doesn't mean you should be self-centered.
5.
Your highest priority is to get through school with good grades.
Life will be interesting when you start working, you will need the motivation and your certificates to help you get far in life. -
IMO it's quite useless to seek help from Police, there is limited thing they can do. It will only bring more stress and upset to you. Anyway be strong and let your ex-boyfriend know you can live better without him.
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imo ts dad should be skinned alive.
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heya, thanks. its like "zhi shao zou de bi ni zao" haha. yup sometimes to console myself i think when i survive this i'd b a much better person than he is even if he strike it rich using his dad no matter how rich he is well he's still way under me. wont make him less of an ass or more of a man. he wld always a working adult who couldnt even b responsible for himself n had to resort to exhorting n exploiting a sch girl. n perhaps working w my own hands i will well see much glorious days than he had seen or will see. we'll see. blabbering to myself in my reply to make myself feel better but ya at least i do kinda now.=)Originally posted by ALW:Well no matter what, please be strong and think of the bright side of life. You're young and you got a promising future, be glad that the jerk is now gone at least you've seen through him, it's not a bad thing afterall.
thanks for the offer i'll pm u when i really need it ya.thanks.=)Originally posted by Honeybear1990:Agree with BBB, Health come first.
If your sick, you will spend money to lie on the bed.
Work? i have many lobang as waiter/waitress if you want. PM me if you really need a job badly.
Take care
my frd's gona intro me to work as waitress as well 6pm-3am ppl say the hrs n work xiong but since its a decent job n it pays well i'll give it a try n if i can handle it,it shd b the 2nd pt job then dun need so fan le. -
you are still a kid.. so what do your friend expect from you? a $2 item from daiso will be good enough...
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1. He doesnt know. Cant let him know. Know him too well it will spell more nightmares n might break down our rlnship for eons. Its my bad that i lost my savings. I really love my parents n value the trust n faith they hav in me since i was young these r some of the most precious things to me i dun wanna lose them n i cant bring myself to make them so upset.Originally posted by jojobeach:Kuri,
1.
Your dad knows about the bad debt to your ex ?
If he does, he's probably very upset you "gave" away the money.
He must think you don't value money so much, that you are willing to part with it so easily.
I got really upset with my mom a few years back when I used to give her a big portion of my income. When I found out she just give away money to her friends in gambling..she claim she just "helping" them as she cannot see them die .......... now I just give her a small token sum.
My money not easy to earn ok. I scrimp and save to make ends meet. How can she just throw away money ?
2.
Next time your "friends" ask you to share the bd present.
Just tell them to count you out. You go get one yourself, more personal this way.
You can decide the amount you want to spend based on the kind of friendship you have with the bday girl/guy.
3.
Girl, you need to take control of your life.
Don't let others control you.
Be street smart. Not just textbook smart.
4.
Protect yourself.. because no one else can do it for you.
This doesn't mean you should be self-centered.
5.
Your highest priority is to get through school with good grades.
Life will be interesting when you start working, you will need the motivation and your certificates to help you get far in life.
2. i m kinda nonchalant bout those now..no mood not much energy left to really bother too much either..
3. haha was never txtbk smart in the first place. streetsmart i'm learning.
4. yup thats wat i tot haha but trying to figure how.
5. i aint scholar material i hav my set of goals tho,it's just how to work ard or over all these incumbents n get to 'em.
thanks for this n ur previous pms babe.*huggies*nite jojo. -
Kuri,Originally posted by kuri:1. He doesnt know. Cant let him know. Know him too well it will spell more nightmares n might break down our rlnship for eons. Its my bad that i lost my savings. I really love my parents n value the trust n faith they hav in me since i was young these r some of the most precious things to me i dun wanna lose them n i cant bring myself to make them so upset.
Your parents are not stupid. They must have access to view your bank account balance.
And you not telling them the truth , ain't helping the situation either.
They probably think you spend money like water.
Parents understand their children will make mistakes in their life.
But you must learn to admit your mistakes and learn from it.
That's the responsibility of a parent to teach their children this very important aspect of life.
Telling them the truth won't destroy the good relationship you have with them.
Lying or hiding the truth WILL.
So think about it. You should keep your communication lines open with them during this critical time of need. -
Well, they cannot force you to pay for the gifts if they did not ask whether you wanna chip in or not....
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i believe telling them will worsen not help things. i had been managing my own accs these few yrs the acc my parents wld b able to check the balance i use my last 3 temp jobs this hols to fill it alr. main one which is the mega hole one they hav completely no access to so it's not that they'r stupid or wat. but my parents dun really check on me and i like to keep things this way dun wanna do anything to jeopardise the trust its like one of the most important things we share. besides if my dad knows there's nth he can do he's broke now so he's just gona get more mad at me i will more than my fair share of his rage w life n he'll start ranting n ranting at me everyday for losing so much money to asshole n qns every single thing i do from then on. plz,i know the man. n my mom will b upset w me n pissed at my dad for the reactionary behaviours n attitudes i know he's gona hav. can u imagine the possible upheavel the life i m trying i stablise now might go thru again? n if my parents quarrrel cos of this it will b my darn fault? true i may be suffering unnecesarily with the additional burdens mentally emotionally n financially i hav to bear hiding this frm them but they r too impt to me i just cant bring myself to tell them i hav let them down. i cant imagine those gloomy disappointed faces for days n days. i dun want my family to be affected cos of my cursed bad brush with an asshole.Originally posted by jojobeach:Kuri,
Your parents are not stupid. They must have access to view your bank account balance.
And you not telling them the truth , ain't helping the situation either.
They probably think you spend money like water.
Parents understand their children will make mistakes in their life.
But you must learn to admit your mistakes and learn from it.
That's the responsibility of a parent to teach their children this very important aspect of life.
Telling them the truth won't destroy the good relationship you have with them.
Lying or hiding the truth WILL.
So think about it. You should keep your communication lines open with them during this critical time of need.
i appreciate ur concern but on this count i hav decided not to let my parents know. in fact thats the motivating factor for me to push so hard n everything cos MY PRIORITY since the incident is to figure a way to resolve this n get back on my own feet, as much as possible without letting my parents n sibling know so my family aint affected.
i may sound like an escapist, its just disclosure to my parents never was an option to me in this case, to hav the best chance of moving on i cant let my parents know. i m not lying thru my teeth to them i just want to get my life back,if i can cope they dun probe. my private emotional life's a wreackage i dun wan my family life to be one too. i got myself into this shit i will have to get myself out of it wld really appreciate not getting additional reprimanding,scoffing n dissing from those who know n some encouragement frm those who care.
so now basically i m just trying to figure how to work my way thru all these around the FACT that my parents doesnt know n at least in the next decade probably wont know bout the scumbag n his legacy.
ppl hav told me it may not b rite well mayb. n mayb it's my ego that i m not willing to admit such a big failure to whom held me as the pride of their lives for at least 2 decades. but for all the blah i hav said n watever it is, i hav alr determined it as a prequisite of any possible solution or path i can consider out of this. hope i'd b able to see the light of the day in not too long. -
I'm sorry to hear about your state, pal, but I respect the way you think huh. There may be plenty of greedy and materialistic people in this world... makes me think of that singaporean girl who asks me about 5Cs and then when I tell her that I am not working, she says oh you must be rich, dun have to work, then I said no I am very broke and she started pouring insults and in the end stop talking to me, lol... That kinda open my eyes about them huh, it says alot about them. Come on if someone is broke, they work, if someone dun work, then they need to have money, so I don't understand why people believe that anyone can be broke and not work at the same time, it's logic right, i might be wrong anywayz, and the funny thing is how a simple test like this totally reveal people ugly faces. It's funny how easy to test people out you know, some people couldn't even pass the first test, so these people shouldn't belong in your life dude, they dun deserve you man, they are not true friends, get over it. I'm just saying that yeah there are materialistic and money faced people all around, but dun let those dikheds cause you misery huh, coz despite the dikheds there are still nice people around, and you're still young I guess, money is rather hard to come by, but I think that once you get pass the down periods of life, you will get a taste of the up periods of life later on, I just hope when those times come to you, you won't grow arrogant and become another pretentious person. Just dun need to get bothered with those pretentious rich people wannabe huh, yesterday I was at Orchard and 2 young guys keep boasting and talking big and then I realize they are probably working part time at $5/hour jobs. All the boasting here and there, I was thinking in my heart, wtf you guys dun have to be so fake man, or was it my girlfriend who is sitting beside me that you guys are trying to impress, i know my girlfriend's hot but you guys dun have to be so fake man. I just tot u don't have to pretend or talk big to be another person, it's your life, keep it real man. There's too many fake people around, dun join the crowds. It's ok to be broke, just understand that it's only a temporary situation, you're NOT alone and things will get better ahead.Originally posted by kuri:still sloughing for the bank accs asshole emptied..after so much hard work i managed to fill in what i urgently needed but my main acc is still pretty empty cos i aint gg to get any allowances anymore so need to sustain myself..just got scolded by dad for not gg to the doc cos i m sick i din want to waste the money i think i'd b fine after a while but he said thats my way of protesting the discontinuation of allowances wat cant y i understand his situation. haih i m not even complaining to him, who understands mine.
my ex classmates 21st bdays r comin.. one of them my few other ex-classmates say wanna get nintendo ds for her count me in told 'em i broke they say nvm i pay by instalment i barely know or even talked to the bday girl man haha reminds me of last yr when my uni mates keep asking me to contribute this n that for ppl's bdays, n even when they bugged me for this kinda contribution just after my bday i said they forgot totally bout bday din even say happy bday to me i tot the person chasing me for the money/contribution wld at least say "sry..happy belated bday" or smt but she just told me "shut up n pay up". may hav a been a totless reaction from her but it hurts my feelings that was the last straw n i decided to distance myself from this bunch of ppl quietly.. almost one yr has past since n now that time for me is much worse than it used to be n everything comes clammering down at me... i feel so disillusioned at the ppl ard me.. who really cares? why do ppl only come to me when they r down or neld help? when they said thank you each time i did smt sweet to them did it mean anything to them at all? even tho i not expecting tangible or calculated returns for what i did its just so pathetic the end of the day nobody even bothers bout how r u kuri r u alrite?
feeling so depressed n lonely..after some frantic job search i just got another new pt job but the basic pay alr zui n i feel so bitter now keep forcing myself to work really feel like giving myself a break before sch starts.. i really wonder what hav i done wrong.. is asshole rite that i had offered frdship n help too unconditional that ppl ard me takes me for granted? but i dun wish to subscribe to my dad n asshole's "ren bu wei ji, tian zhi di mie" kinda worldview.. yet the chill inside me really pricks n hurts so much feels so hollow so disoriented now i dunno wat to do... -
TS,Originally posted by kuri:still sloughing for the bank accs asshole emptied..after so much hard work i managed to fill in what i urgently needed but my main acc is still pretty empty cos i aint gg to get any allowances anymore so need to sustain myself..just got scolded by dad for not gg to the doc cos i m sick i din want to waste the money i think i'd b fine after a while but he said thats my way of protesting the discontinuation of allowances wat cant y i understand his situation. haih i m not even complaining to him, who understands mine.
my ex classmates 21st bdays r comin.. one of them my few other ex-classmates say wanna get nintendo ds for her count me in told 'em i broke they say nvm i pay by instalment i barely know or even talked to the bday girl man haha reminds me of last yr when my uni mates keep asking me to contribute this n that for ppl's bdays, n even when they bugged me for this kinda contribution just after my bday i said they forgot totally bout bday din even say happy bday to me i tot the person chasing me for the money/contribution wld at least say "sry..happy belated bday" or smt but she just told me "shut up n pay up". may hav a been a totless reaction from her but it hurts my feelings that was the last straw n i decided to distance myself from this bunch of ppl quietly.. almost one yr has past since n now that time for me is much worse than it used to be n everything comes clammering down at me... i feel so disillusioned at the ppl ard me.. who really cares? why do ppl only come to me when they r down or neld help? when they said thank you each time i did smt sweet to them did it mean anything to them at all? even tho i not expecting tangible or calculated returns for what i did its just so pathetic the end of the day nobody even bothers bout how r u kuri r u alrite?
feeling so depressed n lonely..after some frantic job search i just got another new pt job but the basic pay alr zui n i feel so bitter now keep forcing myself to work really feel like giving myself a break before sch starts.. i really wonder what hav i done wrong.. is asshole rite that i had offered frdship n help too unconditional that ppl ard me takes me for granted? but i dun wish to subscribe to my dad n asshole's "ren bu wei ji, tian zhi di mie" kinda worldview.. yet the chill inside me really pricks n hurts so much feels so hollow so disoriented now i dunno wat to do...
For the unreturned money, you have 2 choices, try to get it back (maybe by knocking on door), or let it go as a lost investment.
In any case, try to cease being bitter about it. Even siblings can be chao kuan.
For your relationship with ur dad, it's great you don't think like him. After all, you have enough education in you to know that being mean doesn't lead to happiness. Try to view everything in a compassionate light, and try to protect yourself from the resentment of people around you.
Friends who demand money from others (for whatever reason) are childish at best. It's neither rude nor uncaring not to contribute (whether for charity or for friends' presents), it simply means that you have ur own priorities. Taking care of yourself is not selfish. (Selfishness simply means not considering other peoples' wellbeing in your own actions.)
Above all, you need to protect and serve yourself before doing the same for other people.
Likes others said, studies is an investment towards better living.
More importantly, your attitude in your life makes a difference. Let the bitterness go.
If you cease being bitter, and stick to your principles, you will find a shining light wherever you go.
Good luck! -
glad you are picking yourself up.
from what i recall, you debt abit hard to chase back. either give up or jsut try one last time legally/police. don't think will help though.
as for your "friends", their behavior has shown them to be not, i suggest you just ignore them. and tell the person who told you to shut up and pay to shut up and go away -
Kuri,Originally posted by kuri:i believe telling them will worsen not help things. i had been managing my own accs these few yrs the acc my parents wld b able to check the balance i use my last 3 temp jobs this hols to fill it alr. main one which is the mega hole one they hav completely no access to so it's not that they'r stupid or wat. but my parents dun really check on me and i like to keep things this way dun wanna do anything to jeopardise the trust its like one of the most important things we share. besides if my dad knows there's nth he can do he's broke now so he's just gona get more mad at me i will more than my fair share of his rage w life n he'll start ranting n ranting at me everyday for losing so much money to asshole n qns every single thing i do from then on. plz,i know the man. n my mom will b upset w me n pissed at my dad for the reactionary behaviours n attitudes i know he's gona hav. can u imagine the possible upheavel the life i m trying i stablise now might go thru again? n if my parents quarrrel cos of this it will b my darn fault? true i may be suffering unnecesarily with the additional burdens mentally emotionally n financially i hav to bear hiding this frm them but they r too impt to me i just cant bring myself to tell them i hav let them down. i cant imagine those gloomy disappointed faces for days n days. i dun want my family to be affected cos of my cursed bad brush with an asshole.
i appreciate ur concern but on this count i hav decided not to let my parents know. in fact thats the motivating factor for me to push so hard n everything cos MY PRIORITY since the incident is to figure a way to resolve this n get back on my own feet, as much as possible without letting my parents n sibling know so my family aint affected.
i may sound like an escapist, its just disclosure to my parents never was an option to me in this case, to hav the best chance of moving on i cant let my parents know. i m not lying thru my teeth to them i just want to get my life back,if i can cope they dun probe. my private emotional life's a wreackage i dun wan my family life to be one too. i got myself into this shit i will have to get myself out of it wld really appreciate not getting additional reprimanding,scoffing n dissing from those who know n some encouragement frm those who care.
so now basically i m just trying to figure how to work my way thru all these around the FACT that my parents doesnt know n at least in the next decade probably wont know bout the scumbag n his legacy.
ppl hav told me it may not b rite well mayb. n mayb it's my ego that i m not willing to admit such a big failure to whom held me as the pride of their lives for at least 2 decades. but for all the blah i hav said n watever it is, i hav alr determined it as a prequisite of any possible solution or path i can consider out of this. hope i'd b able to see the light of the day in not too long.
If you have a daughter in similar situation as you now.
What would you advise/do for her ?