man in despair ..
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i think u r kind enough to let him slack down for 2mths. its time he shd wake up. have a good talk with him, if he stil continues, then no choice ask him to leave lor. u did ur best liao.
i believe my colleague wont be so nice to me. maybe can tahan me for 2wks max. nia.. -
Which is worst to end one life due to depression or work hard to get out off depression?Originally posted by maurizio13:Most Singaporeans don't understand depression, it's not a matter of him refusing to budge, but sometimes when someone is overcome with depression, they are unable to. I have had 2 friends with depression, one took his life afew years back, another is still managing it. It's not so easy as to just snap out of it (depression).
If you value your company more than a person's life than do as you may. After all this is Singapore, where money comes first and humanity comes last. Sometimes it's tiring to talk with typical Singaporeans, they place money above everything else. It's sad to see society degenerate to greed.
Sometimes I wonder, what is the price of a human life???
I can understand from your point of view that a person life is important, but my question is did my boss value my life back then?
I got only 2 days to cope with my break up and got a rude shock of my life when I went back to my workplace only to find out that a letter was waiting for me. Do you seriously think anyone care about my life?
After I was asked to leave, I had to fight hard to find a job, to feed myself and my family. I had to leave my pride and ask for help, those were the darkest days of my life but I told myself "no" I will not die so easily and I fought hard to be what I was today.
Maybe you have had feel the pain of seeing your love ones suffer just becos you could not earn enough for them. Back then i had to eat only one meal a day in order to surive.
This is life. No one will pity you if you are weak and cannot make it. Is a lesson only that could be learn if you have nothing left and you are force to do what you can to surive.
The person is lucky to have 2 months, I got 2 days, do you think is fair ?
Since when life is fair anyway? -
No pay leave for him.
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But this guy was pissed off by his gf. As a girl, I may have a solution to his problem, so it's quite unfair that you only seek guys opinons and answers.Originally posted by ahshuiger:We are working in all male environment. sad to say, if there is a female around, I am sure the morale of the staff would be better ... sigh . .
Tho the environment maybe male donminant, most should have wives and gfs, who knows?? their contributions may help in one way or the other. -
oh .. did I specifically asked for guy help only ... my apology.. I would love to hear a feminine side to it .. I am sure it would help ..Originally posted by angel7030:But this guy was pissed off by his gf. As a girl, I may have a solution to his problem, so it's quite unfair that you only seek guys opinons and answers.
Tho the environment maybe male donminant, most should have wives and gfs, who knows?? their contributions may help in one way or the other.
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I feel sorry for you. You were unlucky to meet a boss that doesn't appreciate that human have feeling and when it's hurt, it more painful than anything else .. . I can understand your feeling too .. you are very strong indeed .. I wish my colleague could be like you .. I just have some more feedback from the other .. his work is really beyond acceptance ... . sigh .. when he is back to morrow, need really to open table leow ..Originally posted by zeny:Which is worst to end one life due to depression or work hard to get out off depression?
I can understand from your point of view that a person life is important, but my question is did my boss value my life back then?
I got only 2 days to cope with my break up and got a rude shock of my life when I went back to my workplace only to find out that a letter was waiting for me. Do you seriously think anyone care about my life?
After I was asked to leave, I had to fight hard to find a job, to feed myself and my family. I had to leave my pride and ask for help, those were the darkest days of my life but I told myself "no" I will not die so easily and I fought hard to be what I was today.
Maybe you have had feel the pain of seeing your love ones suffer just becos you could not earn enough for them. Back then i had to eat only one meal a day in order to surive.
This is life. No one will pity you if you are weak and cannot make it. Is a lesson only that could be learn if you have nothing left and you are force to do what you can to surive.
The person is lucky to have 2 months, I got 2 days, do you think is fair ?
Since when life is fair anyway? -
He's still sleeping... He need someone to wake him up...
Be it a good talk with him, or a good scolding...
Help him to wake up. -
wat should u do ???
lol... like u have choice like tat???
Being the middleman, u have to answer to yr boss and care for yr subordinate... If u cant find a diplomatic way to convince yr boss, then, u have to do something to the subordinate... wat other choice do u have???
Tell him : (Must be serious lah)
1) show regrets to him
2) yr situation
3) the company situation and yr boss idea
4) Warn him what the company will do to him -
give him 1 warning telling him if he continues he wil b sack.
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Yah. Hard being sandwiched in between. I think being his senior, you should at least try your best to help him out as a friend (unless he is just a worker and his life or death doesn't concern you). Maybe he could take 2 weeks no pay leave to sort out his feelings. If all else fails, talk to your boss see what he says. But judging from the way businesses are run (for profit), I think your boss would most likely asked him to leave. And corporation blame workers for no sense of loyalty to the company, I wonder why.Originally posted by ispyyy:wat should u do ???
lol... like u have choice like tat???
Being the middleman, u have to answer to yr boss and care for yr subordinate... If u cant find a diplomatic way to convince yr boss, then, u have to do something to the subordinate... wat other choice do u have???
Tell him : (Must be serious lah)
1) show regrets to him
2) yr situation
3) the company situation and yr boss idea
4) Warn him what the company will do to him -
ItOriginally posted by maurizio13:Yah. Hard being sandwiched in between. I think being his senior, you should at least try your best to help him out as a friend (unless he is just a worker and his life or death doesn't concern you). Maybe he could take 2 weeks no pay leave to sort out his feelings. If all else fails, talk to your boss see what he says. But judging from the way businesses are run (for profit), I think your boss would most likely asked him to leave. And corporation blame workers for no sense of loyalty to the company, I wonder why. -
ahshuiger,
Ask that guy to take long vacation leave.
No point taking random leave like this.
If he needs to have some time to heal.
2 months is more than enough.
Let him know that he still has his resonsibilities to provide satisfactory work to his company as long as he is receiving his pay.
Check with HR how many more leave days he has.
Let him know that while he is taking his long leave, you will be hiring a temp to cover his work.
If he still don't wake up his idea, it is because he is taking advantage of other people's kindness towards his current situation. -
ever got one guy fren tell me...
if a man is out of love, what his buddy can do is to bring him out and intro nice girl to him.. -
no need to decide for him, ask him what he wants to do, take leave or get on with work. he should decide, handle this formally.
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yr guy friends is hinting to u to intro him some pretty gals lahOriginally posted by browniebaobao:ever got one guy fren tell me...
if a man is out of love, what his buddy can do is to bring him out and intro nice girl to him..
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hmm, if your colleague is such a person..who changed after broken up with his gf..
since you already given him the chance..and he didn't recover and give sloppy work attitude and excuses..
there's a few choices which you can choose from
1) Serious Warning (you and him OR whole office meeting on his problem)
2) Tell him your difficulties too and let him know that he has to take up responsibilities if not just because of his mistake, you will be penalized too.
at least this will make him feel guilty
3) Have a Man-To-Man talk. Tell him how to draw the line clearly between WORK and PERSONAL LIFE. (of couse you as a colleague & superior of his) can offer him some advice..or even go the extra mile of advising him that breaking up with a gal doesn't means the end of the world..
4) Use some reverse actions: Ask the reason why he broke up with his ex, upon knowing the reason than speak to him that it is his ex-gf's loss to break up with him in the first place (if that's really the case, coz if it's the guy, the reaction shouldn't be so huge) praise him and say that he should get back on his feet, and show the ex-gf that he deserves a better gf.
Encourage him to work harder and out-perform his own best performance so as to win back the ex-gf, but when the ex comes back..kick her aside..although that's evil...but it's considered sweet revenge from the colleague of yours..
5) Solve his problem first, before introducing another lady to him, coz a immediate replacement of another female fren will just be a stand-in/subsitute which will not have the sparkle nor attraction..
Perhaps just pull him out to go out with you all and the other ladies as well as a group dinner etc...at least let him know that there are others who care for him..thus he shouldn't disappoint you all. -
Hmmm...that is more better,Originally posted by ahshuiger:oh .. did I specifically asked for guy help only ... my apology.. I would love to hear a feminine side to it .. I am sure it would help ..
Ok, as a female HR practioner, i do practice ethical management, i need to understand human problems before making executive decision. In your case, in a colleagueship terms, I will hold a meeting with him. Draw out a plan for him to perform better, counsel and encourage him to get back on track, set a mandate, let say in a month time, if he is still unperforming, give him a last chance, another month, still same, then you will have no remorse but to ask him to leave or terminate his contract of service.
You have tried your best to help him, but who is going to help those other poor colleagues covering up his job and his poor superior finding it hard to mgt the dept. Moreover if he dun seem to fit to work, better remove him than having prolong problem leading to more problem, who know, it maybe better for him.
The Company is built to make profit, not a charity organisation. -
that guy fren got gf de la.Originally posted by NewAge:yr guy friends is hinting to u to intro him some pretty gals lah -
I can understand how your subordinate has felt, and I hope my story can help him to realise and see another side of things.
I was working very hard for my present company for the past 1.5 years and it seems like I have gained a certain level of recognition and appreciation. I am single all that time and because my present job is a career switch for me, it drove me to work very hard. However, fate has it that I have to meet someone whom I lost contact for 12 years (first love). I thought I can settle down with that person but news about her impending wedding has caused me to be sunk into a mini crisis.
That time, I would think to myself, what for study so hard and upgrade myself constantly on a part-time basis only to find that I cannot settle down with someone I love. I wasnt myself for 3-4 months. Even though I was physically at work, my mind wasnt concentrating and I rated myself very poorly on my job performance. Although my superiors did not say, some of my colleagues were speculating I was looking for a better job offer elsewhere.
In the end, when the time comes, I tendered my resignation even though I received news that I will be promoted to the next level. Sounds crazy but it is the truth....probably because of the hard work during these 1.5 years. I tendered is because I do not wish to accept (as I feel I do not deserve) the promotion and at the same time, feel guilty that I have in a way let the company down.
To your subordinate, if you know his problem, have a talk to him. Tell him that if he is to lose his job, his ex will not care or even pity him. You ask him is it worth it? I can understand that if his whole life and happiness is to bank on his ex, he will be devastated and to him, work and life is meaningless because of this incident.
Maybe he has the intention to marry her but she refuse. Whatever it is, his family is also concern about him. Imagine he is like this at work, how about when he is at home?? Assess his current situation, if you know that his ex meant so much to him, you more or less should do what is necessary......to ask him to leave......as this kind of situation will drag until he wakes up finally to realise that his current depression has caused so much hurt to his surrounding people who cared most about him. -
i think u love him lright?
