Feeling distanced from class
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Hi, I'll try to keep this short, I can elaborate if you want me to. Basically, I cannot seem to bond with my class. For example, I would try to socialise with the others by sitting at their table for lunch break, but, all they ever do is talk among themselves while I eat. A lot of times, I finsh eating in silence then walk away, I dont even think they noticed. It makes me feel invisible so I stopped sitting with them after a while. Then now, they still dont notice whenever I'm gone. I'm not demanding attention or anything, I just want to be part of a group that bonds together. I mean, the rest of them are fine, so it is confirmed that something is wrong with me. Is it my appearance? or my attitude? I try to be nice a lot of times. For example, this girl in my class, with whom I have a similar timetable to, I want to get to know her as a friend. Then I try to sit beside her in class. This is how she treats me: When she wants something, she is very nice, smiles and all. But when she doesn't need anything from me, she is PMS and bitchy. But when another guy, also a friend that share the similar timetable comes in, she'd ask me to move away from her so that the guy can sit beside her. Like today, I went in class with that guy friend, she looked at him, only at him, and said "You can sit beside me" That really hurt me a lot, but I try to be nice and I just move away.
That is only once example from a person. as for the class, they wont notice me when I'm gone. Not even a 'Bye!' Class activities, I am the last one to know and conversations, I have to always initiate and not be the one who gets talked to. Instead I'll be the one doing the talking to someone else just in order to seem more sociable. Honestly, I am jealous of how my other guy friends get attention from the other people. Maybe it's because they think I'm a very serious person, but I try to be a fun person and they think I've gone "mad".
I mean, it's nice to feel loved by someone else and feel that you play a part in this community. I mean, everyone else in that community seems to get along fine. It must be just me and I'm already having some problems with this. I think I'm cracking under it. I've considered taking 30 panadols after someone I wanted in a relationship rejected me. Also, i have been saying and hearing these voices of both myself and other people. Sometimes, I'd even have conversations with the voices as though they were real people. I don't want to see a doctor cause what would the rest of the class think of me when they know I'm mentally unstable? Help me please. I'm desperate. I've bought the panadol already. -
haha, cast away isit ??
i oso lidat, so i never go school le...
but im going to have tuitions while im at home.
speak to ur principal about it, maybe they can bring u to another class or make u stay at home. -
Zhunbo!??Originally posted by rathcycle:haha, cast away isit ??
i oso lidat, so i never go school le...
but im going to have tuitions while im at home.
speak to ur principal about it, maybe they can bring u to another class or make u stay at home. -
yepz.Originally posted by Xephone_xenon:Zhunbo!??
cuz i got case, so i feel uneasy in school
what makes u think im lying ?
i only go back to school once in a while for exams or to take important notes only. -
PLEASE STAY AWAY FROM THE PANADOLS.. THROW THEM AWAY
30 wont kill.. trust me.
but it will cause you more pain for you and the ppl you love..
do seek professional help.. do take a look at the helpline thread.
your friends dont worth the panadols.. trust me. -
Firstly, yes I am probably a cast away. I cannot go to school, my parents think everything is fine cause I dont ever tell them anything cause I cannot bring myself to. So all the time, Ihave to make it as though everything is fine and I'm happy but I'm not. I cannot go for tuition cause my parents cannot afford, the only tuition I have is even paid out of my own savings. And no point speaking to the P cause I am in J2, year ending soon...Originally posted by rathcycle:haha, cast away isit ??
i oso lidat, so i never go school le...
but im going to have tuitions while im at home.
speak to ur principal about it, maybe they can bring u to another class or make u stay at home. -
Very hard case leh yours.Originally posted by PlsDunBanMe:Hi, I'll try to keep this short, I can elaborate if you want me to. Basically, I cannot seem to bond with my class. For example, I would try to socialise with the others by sitting at their table for lunch break, but, all they ever do is talk among themselves while I eat. A lot of times, I finsh eating in silence then walk away, I dont even think they noticed. It makes me feel invisible so I stopped sitting with them after a while. Then now, they still dont notice whenever I'm gone. I'm not demanding attention or anything, I just want to be part of a group that bonds together. I mean, the rest of them are fine, so it is confirmed that something is wrong with me. Is it my appearance? or my attitude? I try to be nice a lot of times. For example, this girl in my class, with whom I have a similar timetable to, I want to get to know her as a friend. Then I try to sit beside her in class. This is how she treats me: When she wants something, she is very nice, smiles and all. But when she doesn't need anything from me, she is PMS and bitchy. But when another guy, also a friend that share the similar timetable comes in, she'd ask me to move away from her so that the guy can sit beside her. Like today, I went in class with that guy friend, she looked at him, only at him, and said "You can sit beside me"
I mean, it's nice to feel loved by someone else and feel that you play a part in this community. I mean, everyone else in that community seems to get along fine. It must be just me and I'm already having some problems with this. I think I'm cracking under it. I've considered taking 30 panadols after someone I wanted in a relationship rejected me. Also, i have been saying and hearing these voices of both myself and other people. Sometimes, I'd even have conversations with the voices as though they were real people. I don't want to see a doctor cause what would the rest of the class think of me when they know I'm mentally unstable? Help me please. I'm desperate. I've bought the panadol already.
Sometimes if you not accepted, means no hope liao.
And for your case i think is no hope.
Sometimes people like that one la, even if you try to be friendly.
People say you extra.
You crack joke, people say you lame.
You do what ever lan people also buay song with you.
The only way is to bo bian and walk away.
Be a hikikomori. -
then u just sit down, just whack your a levels and get it over with..Originally posted by PlsDunBanMe:Firstly, yes I am probably a cast away. I cannot go to school, my parents think everything is fine cause I dont ever tell them anything cause I cannot bring myself to. So all the time, Ihave to make it as though everything is fine and I'm happy but I'm not. I cannot go for tuition cause my parents cannot afford, the only tuition I have is even paid out of my own savings. And no point speaking to the P cause I am in J2, year ending soon...
you will make more friends in life. -
What case? Sibei song leh you.Originally posted by rathcycle:haha, cast away isit ??
i oso lidat, so i never go school le...
but im going to have tuitions while im at home.
speak to ur principal about it, maybe they can bring u to another class or make u stay at home.
Whole day anime,rpg and dota? -
JC then u better attend lah..Originally posted by PlsDunBanMe:Firstly, yes I am probably a cast away. I cannot go to school, my parents think everything is fine cause I dont ever tell them anything cause I cannot bring myself to. So all the time, Ihave to make it as though everything is fine and I'm happy but I'm not. I cannot go for tuition cause my parents cannot afford, the only tuition I have is even paid out of my own savings. And no point speaking to the P cause I am in J2, year ending soon...
im in sec sch, so at home studying is still possible, JC is almost impossible to study at home unless you are super clever and hardworking. -
I've researched already. It takes only 20 panadols to cause you to have blood toxicity, so 30 will be fine. And the people I love, they dont love me back or else I wouldn't be putting this down. Or at least, I dont feel their love, yet I have to pretend to be happy all the time. I have done this for a lot of years already and I feel exhausted. Everytime I go into a new school, I tell myself, I have to change, but that never seems to happen. I cannot seek professional help cause I dont want people to know. I'm sorry. But I dont get your point on why "your friends dont worth the panadols"? Please explain.Originally posted by ifish:PLEASE STAY AWAY FROM THE PANADOLS.. THROW THEM AWAY
30 wont kill.. trust me.
but it will cause you more pain for you and the ppl you love..
do seek professional help.. do take a look at the helpline thread.
your friends dont worth the panadols.. trust me. -
sibei sonG ?Originally posted by Xephone_xenon:What case? Sibei song leh you.
Whole day anime,rpg and dota?
more like sibei stress loh
teachers keep on asking when wana come back.
mother keep on asking why don't wana go.. although i got permission not to go
studying alone for accounts/humanities/comb chem is almost impossible...
but i is whole day ... play lah
WoW, cs, SgF sumtimes..
but i very slack on WoW and CS le.. cuz play long very tiring.. -
You like asking him to take more like that. Wha lao.Originally posted by ifish:PLEASE STAY AWAY FROM THE PANADOLS.. THROW THEM AWAY
30 wont kill.. trust me. -
iFish, it's not about making friends in life. the thing is, I've always been one who ISN"T a friend magnet. I swear, the friends I have in sec sch adds up to a max of 10 fingers. The whole of FOUR years! as for this current school. I dare say I've made none good friends, good defined as in those I can trust my darkest secrets and everything.
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Last time my school got one guy same case as you.Originally posted by rathcycle:sibei sonG ?
more like sibei stress loh
teachers keep on asking when wana come back.
mother keep on asking why don't wana go.. although i got permission not to go
studying alone for accounts/humanities/comb chem is almost impossible...
but i is whole day ... play lah
WoW, cs, SgF sumtimes..
but i very slack on WoW and CS le.. cuz play long very tiring..
No nid go school one.
I see you like can socialise propely in sgforum leh.
Can joke can talk cock can talk pervert crap.
I think go school you also no problem one leh.
Whats exactly your case? As in illness or something.
PM me. -
Hi, I appreciate your help, but I'll clarify some things. Firstly, I try to be friendly, people dont say I extra. People are friendly back, but friendly in the terms of an aqaintance, not real friend. I dont crack jokes cause I'm not the creative type of person. And people is not buay song what I do, people just dont even bat an eylid about what I do, even if it means alot to me.Originally posted by Xephone_xenon:Very hard case leh yours.
Sometimes if you not accepted, means no hope liao.
And for your case i think is no hope.
Sometimes people like that one la, even if you try to be friendly.
People say you extra.
You crack joke, people say you lame.
You do what ever lan people also buay song with you.
The only way is to bo bian and walk away.
Be a hikikomori. -
Think more positive la.Originally posted by PlsDunBanMe:iFish, it's not about making friends in life. the thing is, I've always been one who ISN"T a friend magnet. I swear, the friends I have in sec sch adds up to a max of 10 fingers. The whole of FOUR years! as for this current school. I dare say I've made none good friends, good defined as in those I can trust my darkest secrets and everything.
Have alot of friends bo eng one.
You just have to find ONE good friend can liao.
And just keep thinking that finding the ONE wont be hard lo. -
Okay sorry sorry.Originally posted by PlsDunBanMe:Hi, I appreciate your help, but I'll clarify some things. Firstly, I try to be friendly, people dont say I extra. People are friendly back, but friendly in the terms of an aqaintance, not real friend. I dont crack jokes cause I'm not the creative type of person. And people is not buay song what I do, people just dont even bat an eylid about what I do, even if it means alot to me.
Your case damm hard ah. -
he means they arent true frens that are worth for u to die for.Originally posted by PlsDunBanMe:I've researched already. It takes only 20 panadols to cause you to have blood toxicity, so 30 will be fine. And the people I love, they dont love me back or else I wouldn't be putting this down. Or at least, I dont feel their love, yet I have to pretend to be happy all the time. I have done this for a lot of years already and I feel exhausted. Everytime I go into a new school, I tell myself, I have to change, but that never seems to happen. I cannot seek professional help cause I dont want people to know. I'm sorry. But I dont get your point on why "your friends dont worth the panadols"? Please explain.
imo, since ur year is ending, seriously, just do well for ur As, go uni, go for orientations and get to know more freshmen and make new frens. -
Looking at how he is doing now. Unlikely.Originally posted by lageihsif:he means they arent true frens that are worth for u to die for.
imo, since ur year is ending, seriously, just do well for ur As, go uni, go for orientations and get to know more freshmen and make new frens. -
search my name up in the search bar, i lazy to type.Originally posted by Xephone_xenon:Last time my school got one guy same case as you.
No nid go school one.
I see you like can socialise propely in sgforum leh.
Can joke can talk cock can talk pervert crap.
I think go school you also no problem one leh.
Whats exactly your case? As in illness or something.
PM me.
i dun create a lot of topics so its easy for you to find out. -
and ya, last time i use to be able to socialise, have really loads of friends, im my class joker too.Originally posted by Xephone_xenon:Last time my school got one guy same case as you.
No nid go school one.
I see you like can socialise propely in sgforum leh.
Can joke can talk cock can talk pervert crap.
I think go school you also no problem one leh.
Whats exactly your case? As in illness or something.
PM me.
but after that case.... hmm
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When I first came to my JC, I wanted to start anew, but then I saw my old friends there so I cannot already cause I must treat them the same as the people I'm going to meet. I dare say that I've changed to become more sociable than before already. but this is not a case of whether am I sociable or not. It's about whether does anyone in the community care for you? I want to be cared for, I already miss that out from my parents. My parents only give me shelter and food, I dont even discuss with them about my personal problems. School is always "okay". You get what I mean?
I know this case is hard, but I wish someone could help me even though I know it is almost impossible. Thanks alot. I really appreciate your help and concern. -
Firstly, I must go school cause no one else but me knows of this problem. Like I've said, it's like personality disorder. I treat and talk differently with people in school, at home, online etc. All differently. Also, I slipped into depression for a while when my mom beat me for a few days in a row with a bamboo pole, until the bamboo polebreak and I ran away from home. I can socialise properly in forum is different from real world. In forum I can say anything I want cause my face is hidden by my nick, but in real world I have to act happy.
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well i managed to in sec sch. although not as jialat la...at least still gt ppl eat meals with me...but i didnt have wad u will call true frens back then...Originally posted by Xephone_xenon:Looking at how he is doing now. Unlikely.
then now im in poly. i got nothing better to do so i joined the freshmen orientation camp. get to meet lots of fun and new ppl. and i feel much happier now...
so if i can do it, i believe he can too
anyway sgf outings u can go wad