Damn frustrated and confused.
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Originally posted by Deportivo:
[b]Hello? WHAT IS HIS HOBBY???????
Hello? WHAT IS HIS HOBBY???????
Hello? WHAT IS HIS HOBBY???????
Hello? WHAT IS HIS HOBBY???????
[/b]
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
Fgfm,
Girl, you will initiate the breakup.
But you don't take initiative in this relationship.
7. [b]After you hurled vulgarities at him, do you seriously expect him to be all nice and lovey with his replies to you? Geesh girl, if your boyfriend slap you, will you kiss him back ?
[/b]Originally posted by fgfm:
7.) [b]Well..When he's angry he does the same to me.
Last but not least. Yeah, maybe he doesnt enjoy my company. And he painstakingly stuck with me for more than 2 years. Maybe. [/b]Originally posted by jojobeach:
Guys,
TS's boyfriend use vulgarities on girl.
[b]And if I didn't read wrongly, he also slaps her when he is angry with her.
[/b]Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:
[b]Yes. He used vulgarities on her. I feel that no matter what, guy should not use vulgarities on girls.
No. She didn't he slap her.
[/b]Originally posted by RedizAlertz:
There.
Ok, then we take it as he somehow abused u, be it [b]verbally or physically, WHY do u still hopin to patch back with him??? (note: the underlined sentence)
For tis, i hav no advice to give neither will i sympathise. Cos it's pointless.
U need to sort tis out urself. Since u r oready confused, by goin thru all advises over here will onli make u even more confused.
Best of luck.[/b] -
Yea. I believe you understood how I felt. I knew I was too much by hurling abuses at him. But its like really common for us when we are angry. I am not exactly princessy. Its just so-not-me to stay at Orchard alone, moreover its like evening? So crowded. If it was morning, I might go over to his house. I havent talk to him at all.Originally posted by dumbdumb!:because what i feel is that, if he didn't want her to go, he shouldn't even have asked her if she wanted to go, thus putting the idea into her head.
its weird that he asked her if she wanted to go, then later ignore her and not answer her smses and leave her hanging etc without any confirmed planning.
but she was wrong when she threw a tantrum and insisted he take a cab down to meet her. but she was already full of frustration, it becomes a grey area already. i guess she reached her limit of patience.
and she was wrong to start hurling abuses at her bf.
i think all these problems can be solved with careful planning and sticking to a schedule.
these type of girls are great as friends la, but need careful handling as gfs.
hey, fgfm, what do you think? do you think that you were too much to start hurling abuses at your bf? and you're too princessy? and how? managed to make up with ur bf? -
I had never treated him like a dog. Its not like I demand things from him and make him serve me all the time. I am just hurt. Maybe I do demand things from him at times, but that is mostly when he makes me angry. Like oversleeping when I already told him my tuition ended at 3pm. Moreover, its isnt the first time this thing has happened. As in him oversleeping.Originally posted by Guardx:I have to admit you are one of the most insensitive types.
You are the types who expect guys to treat you like a princess and you treat them like a dog.
seen so many of your types around and I always advice guys to stay away from girls like you.
Sadly your bf do not seems like a real man at all, kena f by gf still treat you so well.
One word of advice for you, better change your ways. people give face to gals who are young and pretty, once you are old or turn ugly, people will hack care about you. Tell you to f off.
To the bf of this girl who maybe reading this :
Dump this gal asap. No point going out with her cos she treats you like trash. Keep saying she loves you but her actions only shows that she treats a dog better than you. They are many other gals who are better looking and treats you with much more respect. -
Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:
Originally posted by RedizAlertz:
Yes. He used vulgarities on her. I feel that no matter what, guy should not use vulgarities on girls.
No. She didn't say he slap her.
edit:typo
Ok, then we take it as he somehow abused u, be it [b]verbally or physically, WHY do u still hopin to patch back with him??? (note: the underlined sentence)
For tis, i hav no advice to give neither will i sympathise. Cos it's pointless.
U need to sort tis out urself. Since u r oready confused, by goin thru all advises over here will onli make u even more confused.
Best of luck.[/quote]
Why are you quoting yourself?
There.
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No lah. He doesnt slap me -.-...Originally posted by jojobeach:Guys,
TS's boyfriend use vulgarities on girl.
And if I didn't read wrongly, he also slaps her when he is angry with her.
And helloooo, would you let your girlfriend wait for you 2 hours at your void decks ?
Isn't it obvious that guy is a total jerk ? -
that meansOriginally posted by fgfm:No lah. He doesnt slap me -.-...
U slap him rite
sumhow, sumhow, i think ur expections of him have changed
get it?
tihnk bout the past....
anyway anyway
i dunoe wad i were do if i were TS bf
haha -
That doesn't mean she slap him.Originally posted by yiha093:that means
U slap him rite
sumhow, sumhow, i think ur expections of him have changed
get it?
tihnk bout the past....
anyway anyway
i dunoe wad i were do if i were TS bf
haha -
she say he doesnt slap herOriginally posted by Darkness_hacker99:That doesn't mean she slap him.
then who?
this is between the 2 of them
so if not guy = gal? -
i respect the fact that you were understanding as to not throw a fit when he didn't reply your messages because he was asleep or he might have went out.Originally posted by fgfm:Yea. I believe you understood how I felt. I knew I was too much by hurling abuses at him. But its like really common for us when we are angry. I am not exactly princessy. Its just so-not-me to stay at Orchard alone, moreover its like evening? So crowded. If it was morning, I might go over to his house. I havent talk to him at all.
you were very nice to have given him his personal space, and you tried to be understanding.
but i think it wasn't right that you want him to spend less time with his hobby (which we are all curious to what that hobby is), so that he can spend more time with you. i think you shouldn't have expected that.
i feel you should have been a little more independant and not throw a tantrum and insist that he take a cab down to meet you. its not cheap and the money can be better spent elsewhere. you could have gone to borders to read a book and chill out. that way he wouldn't have been upset and be nonchalant and curt towards you. i feel that you deserved it la, in a way.
you both have been in the relationship for 2 years, you should know his pattern and habits by now, and he should have known your pattern and habits too. if you know that he's going to oversleep and be late etc, then you both should have come up with a plan to overcome it. -
who's TS?? is it another person, damn confusingOriginally posted by Darkness_hacker99:That doesn't mean she slap him. -
I think his hobby is probably sleeping.
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TS = thread starter = the person who start this threadOriginally posted by dumbdumb!:who's TS?? is it another person, damn confusing -
thanks for clarifying.Originally posted by furb:TS = thread starter = the person who start this thread
but her post nv said he slapped her or abused her leh -
btw, i just want to point out to the thread starter:
it seems to me, that you're in love with the boyfriend in your mind than your boyfriend.
when i say that, i mean that, in your mind, you picture him to be someone who will give up whatever he loves just for you, you picture scenarios from tv drama, and hopes that he will be as romantic as those guys on tv etc.
i think that's very selfish, immature and unrealistic.
just another point. -
What I want exactly is not for him to give up, just reduce.Originally posted by dumbdumb!:btw, i just want to point out to the thread starter:
it seems to me, that you're in love with the boyfriend in your mind than your boyfriend.
when i say that, i mean that, in your mind, you picture him to be someone who will give up whatever he loves just for you, you picture scenarios from tv drama, and hopes that he will be as romantic as those guys on tv etc.
i think that's very selfish, immature and unrealistic.
just another point. -
Dear fgfm,Originally posted by fgfm:What I want exactly is not for him to give up, just reduce.
Sounds oh so familiar.
We've all been through this stage girl.
We want our man to give up something of themselves because we don't approve of it.
Unfortunately, this expectation can only be met, ONLY when he sees it deserving.
We've all tried, we nag, we threaten to end the relationship, we give our most disapproving face, we throw our pride away doing the tantrum shit.
In the end, we're labeled the biatch, by his friends, by his families, by him.
You can either blend in , or you take off.
Don't expect him to change. Either you accept his "hobby" or you don't.
This is part of being in a relationship.
You scope your guy out. His likings, his interests, his hobbies, his circle of friends.
Then you put all these info together and you ask yourself.
IS HIS LIFESTYLE compatible with MINE ??
If the answer is no, the search for to find the guy. Starts all over again.
It takes 2 years for you to figure out this is not the right guy.
Be glad it takes ONLY 2.
Others takes more than 2 some less than 2 to find out he/she is not the right one.
I know of a couple who took them 10 years to finally decide they are not meant for each other.
So consider yourself lucky. -
i agree..Originally posted by jojobeach:Dear fgfm,
Sounds oh so familiar.
We've all been through this stage girl.
We want our man to give up something of themselves because we don't approve of it.
Unfortunately, this expectation can only be met, ONLY when he sees it deserving.
We've all tried, we nag, we threaten to end the relationship, we give our most disapproving face, we throw our pride away doing the tantrum shit.
In the end, we're labeled the biatch, by his friends, by his families, by him.
You can either blend in , or you take off.
Don't expect him to change. Either you accept his "hobby" or you don't.
This is part of being in a relationship.
You scope your guy out. His likings, his interests, his hobbies, his circle of friends.
Then you put all these info together and you ask yourself.
IS HIS LIFESTYLE compatible with MINE ??
If the answer is no, the search for to find the guy. Starts all over again.
It takes 2 years for you to figure out this is not the right guy.
Be glad it takes ONLY 2.
Others takes more than 2 some less than 2 to find out he/she is not the right one.
I know of a couple who took them 10 years to finally decide they are not meant for each other.
So consider yourself lucky.
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I think we do not know enough of TS and her relationship with her bf to label her as a bad gf, or him as a bad bf.
Vulgarities mean different things to different people. Different people have different levels of communication.
TS,
No doubt, you want the understanding and attention of ur bf, and rightly so. But sometimes it helps to communicate properly. And frankly speaking, I think sms text messages sometimes miscommunicate feelings, rather than communicate.
As jojo mentioned, we guys aren't telepathic. We really aren't.
You could have said that "i am looking forward to this party becos i want to unwind", and he would get the message in a clearer manner. And perhaps, both of you would go off happily to the party, and you wouldn't be here posting all these.
Your bf has faults too, but guys usually hate girls who nag at them all the time.
My wife has nagged countlessly at my hobby too, and after sometime, i learnt to give in, and she learnt to respect i need that outlet.
For you, a compromise needs to be set in after much discussion.
Maybe his hobby is a source of self-worth and self-esteem, or simply the best way to unwind, as for me.
I would suggest to the bf, if he reads this, that a relationship requires more than words, it needs action and commitment. Oversleeping and making a girl wait is downright unacceptable. And girls are usually very sensitive and "do one thing while say another". That's girls, for you. Learn to manage the moods of a girl, and you'll get far in your relationship. -
Originally posted by jojobeach:
How about trying to understand why he needs his lifestyle (and hence hobbies) and at the same time, seeking his understanding of why you think his hobby/lifestyle is something you find disagreeable/threatening?
Dear fgfm,
Sounds oh so familiar.
We've all been through this stage girl.
We want our man to give up something of themselves because we don't approve of it.
Unfortunately, this expectation can only be met, ONLY when he sees it deserving.
We've all tried, we nag, we threaten to end the relationship, we give our most disapproving face, we throw our pride away doing the tantrum shit.
In the end, we're labeled the biatch, by his friends, by his families, by him.
You can either blend in , or you take off.
Don't expect him to change. Either you accept his "hobby" or you don't.
This is part of being in a relationship.
You scope your guy out. His likings, his interests, his hobbies, his circle of friends.
Then you put all these info together and you ask yourself.
IS HIS LIFESTYLE compatible with MINE ??
If the answer is no, the search for to find the guy. Starts all over again.
It takes 2 years for you to figure out this is not the right guy.
Be glad it takes ONLY 2.
Others takes more than 2 some less than 2 to find out he/she is not the right one.
I know of a couple who took them 10 years to finally decide they are not meant for each other.
So consider yourself lucky.
The model you've proposed suggested that we are pieces of jigsaw puzzles, and a successful relationship consists of finding the other perfect piece.
How about adapting to the lifestyle, in win-win ways? Of course, it takes two hands to clap. -
It is common for girls to have expectations of their bf.Originally posted by fgfm:What I want exactly is not for him to give up, just reduce.
The best way to get him to reduce his time on the hobby is to try to understand why he needs that hobby.
And I think you are not totally against the hobby, and that is a great starting point.
I think 2 weeks is all you need to patch up, and hopefully you 2 will address the mistakes that lead to this little unfortunate breakup. -
There are many kinds of hobbies.Originally posted by ordinaryguy32:How about trying to understand why he needs his lifestyle (and hence hobbies) and at the same time, seeking his understanding of why you think his hobby/lifestyle is something you find disagreeable/threatening?
The model you've proposed suggested that we are pieces of jigsaw puzzles, and a successful relationship consists of finding the other perfect piece.
How about adapting to the lifestyle, in win-win ways? Of course, it takes two hands to clap.
A woman wouldn't mind their man having hobbies.
Provided they are healthy and wholesome.
In fact, we do understand they need hobbies, and would encourage them to participate in it because we know they need some form of outlet.
There are however, some hobbies that woman will very likely disapprove.
In random order,
1. Clubbing ( too often)
2. Drinking
3. Gambling
4. Snooker/Billiards
5. Street racing
6. Hanging out in void decks/other public places.
7. Computer/Gaming addiction.
8. Porn
These are the few I can think of so far.
The only way a woman can approve of the above hobbies, is unless she, herself enjoys the same hobby too.
But then again, how likely is a man to approve of such a woman ?
Men are our jigsaw puzzle match. Indeed, it is true.
I have to admit I ain't no spring chicken.
I've dated many men, had several relationships, before I met my match.
Imagine a woman who walked out of that fitting room with the one dress that feels good, looks good and priced right, leaving behind a heap of "tried" clothes. This is, I believe a true win-win scenario. -
Lets just take it as his hobby is gaming since its somewhat like it.
The main reason why I really dislike his hobby is because he would neglect me. He doesnt know his limits and he would not reply my smses even if he could pause for a moment. He did it over-excessively once and we broke up as a result. Thus, I have been trying my best to compromise. I tried to accept his hobby, but he doesnt bothers about compromising.
Anyway, the incident has happened more than a week back. We are still sms-ing but not much. And we arent together. He has asked if we wanted to patch but I did not give him an immediate answer. Maybe people in here were right, I dont deserve him. For being such a bad gf. -
pay 4 a china or bangla bf?
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.........Originally posted by radii:pay 4 a china or bangla bf?