harsh reality
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Hey, fatone. Go and tell her already. No point doing all the things you have done and not telling her. Life is not a Korean Drama...if you don't tell her, nobody will. If she rejects you, move on, don't waste your time. You may feel sorry for yourself for a while, but you will get over it.
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very interesting, ur suffering from what we call "desperate syndrome"
let me review ur options.
1) u dun tell her, quit your job
--> u end up regretting.
2) u dun tell her, but continue stalking
--> u end up regretting
so in order not to regret. just try and make friends with her more lar den if the time comes u can confess to every small lil thing u've done. maybe you'll win her heart?
wise man say: its better to do something and not regret den do nothing and regret.
btw if ur fat (like ur user suggests), try slimming down, helps with your morale.
peace
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Fatone,Originally posted by fatone:i've stopped the stalking since the weekend and thank you all for your advise. however, it's not as easy to do what you guys preach. i just can't find or courage to tell her my feelings. i love her, but i don't want to lose this moment where i can secretly love her. if things goes awry, it's downhill for me buddies. i never dreamed in a million years i would be in such a mother fucking situation yet it's the same show everyday. is there anyways of expressing my feelings in a way that i will not turned out in the face?
thanks people, for your time.
Sorry to say, there's no other way.
Either you take the leap of fate, or you continue to wallow in your self-pity being an unsung hero.
The path is yours to take.
If you choose to be the invisible man, you gotta live with your decision.
If you don't have the courage to face love, you will not be given love. -
fatone, it's ur courage to write in the forums? why not have the courage to tell her? u need to know what u gonna say to her and how the way u phrase it... u can't possibly wait for her to initiate? lol u need to do the first move and need some luck orso.. k bb
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yup i agree with the rest about your low self esteem.
there must be other things about you that are better than your competitor!
if you dun feel good about yourself, no one else will. remember it's not the appearances that matter all the time; what keep things going is also about your personality.
i have to admit what you're doing is a little extreme. give her some space, boy. i guess you're just inexperienced in this area.
the next time u put a cake or coffee on her table, leave a note like 'hope you'll enjoy this. smile,(your name)'. dun keep her in the dark anymore, else truly nothing gd will come out of it. let her know you're the one doing all these things.
she do have a choice cos it's her life. at least u can let her know that your competitor is not as nice and sweet as he seems to be, even though she may not choose you or like you back the way you want it.
if things are meant to be, she'll come to you. else, take it with a pinch of salt.
Good luck! -
Are you fat that's why you find yourself below average looking? Anyway, you are too shy for this lah.Originally posted by fatone:i've stopped the stalking since the weekend and thank you all for your advise. however, it's not as easy to do what you guys preach. i just can't find or courage to tell her my feelings. i love her, but i don't want to lose this moment where i can secretly love her. if things goes awry, it's downhill for me buddies. i never dreamed in a million years i would be in such a mother fucking situation yet it's the same show everyday. is there anyways of expressing my feelings in a way that i will not turned out in the face?
thanks people, for your time.
18 yrs old only. Just another crush. Infatuation is like that wan, kept thinking of the person. Now she got lots of attention from other guys, she won't bother who has taken the time to bought coffee for her, the teddy bear or the rose. Who knows she might already know that you like her (don't think she is so innocent lah. 
Anyway, after your holiday job, you will get over this 'infatuation sickness'. Just let the feelings be, most of us have been this before. 
It's just a path of growing up. -
hey dude, i guess you should "test water" a bit. Ask her abt her and the other guy. At least you won't keep guessing how they are progressing and stuff.
And talk to her more lah. Find out more about her. If you don't think that she will be attracted to you based on looks, then you have to win her heart over by putting in more effort to know everything about her. Make her feel like a princess. Trust me.
Looks are not always the most important. The last thing a girl would want would be a man who's not even confident enough of himself. How to protect her if she cant even feel that you can defend yourself. As long as you are not hideous, you would do fine with girls one.
Gd luck man -
I agree with dreamykiteOriginally posted by dreamykite:Are you fat that's why you find yourself below average looking? Anyway, you are too shy for this lah. 18 yrs old only. Just another crush. Infatuation is like that wan, kept thinking of the person. Now she got lots of attention from other guys, she won't bother who has taken the time to bought coffee for her, the teddy bear or the rose. Who knows she might already know that you like her (don't think she is so innocent lah. Anyway, after your holiday job, you will get over this 'infatuation sickness'. Just let the feelings be, most of us have been this before. It's just a path of growing up. 
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(BBB)
it's really a turn off to see one whole chunk of text.
KNN....the TS already in agony over his own problems liao where got time to think about these kind of crap???!!!!
we know u are in agony, but pls dun agonise us by reading ur long wordy post. at least do some paragraphing lah.
TO: THREAD STARTER
obviously u got low self-esteem.
look at your ID....."fatone"??!!! OMFG....that shows how low-esteem you're.
go and do something about your looks.
if you got pimply face, go fix it. if fat, work out hard.
i know love is not about external appearance, but now u lack confidence and improving your apperance is the way to go.
even those tier-one celebrities they don't have face to go public when they don't make-up, and yet they still appear so confident when they've all the styling/cosmetics on etc.
also, you're being a nice guy, overly a wimp liao.
in the American dating scene, they call this kind of guy a "Wussie".
girls want guys with character, not a servant who tidies their desks for them secretly like some quiet loser.
sure, in the movies, guys who do these kind of things get the girl in the end, but this is REAL LIFE, NOT ****ing REEL LIFE!!!!!
don't ****ing KNN care if the guy go out with her or not.
so what if he ****s her everynight while u're playing WoW at home?!
most important thing to do now is to gradually go-slow with her, make her life, but don't be her listening ear or aunt agony.
guys who go down that route will end up as gal-pals to the girl.
u want that???!!!! f*** it.
also, that b*stard guy (your love rival) is a hypocritical animal....so fake sia!
he actually claim your credit??!!!!
on the other hand, you should be happy since u know he's not a perfect guy.
over time, once their relationship stabilizes, he should be making lots of loopholes and let the girl see through him.
for your case now, just ***be cool*** around the girl u like as if you don't ****ing care whether she ends up with you anot.
you need time for this.
and DO NOT EVER go and tell the girl at this time that you like or love her.
that's effing crazy.
you'll lose all your chances, you'll end up like a total loser, you'll scare her off, she'll avoid you, your rival will be laughing till he cum..... tell her only when both you and her already have a strong rapport where she can take it without feeling freaked out.
also, since she's head-over-heels with your rival now, she won't feel anything for you now.
must JIA-YOU!
in the meantime, while waiting for your fish, u can spend your time watching porn to make yourself a more interesting person.
KNN!!!!!!!!!!!!
nikar. -
being a secret admirer is tormenting.Originally posted by fatone:i've stopped the stalking since the weekend and thank you all for your advise. however, it's not as easy to do what you guys preach. i just can't find or courage to tell her my feelings. i love her, but i don't want to lose this moment where i can secretly love her. if things goes awry, it's downhill for me buddies. i never dreamed in a million years i would be in such a mother fucking situation yet it's the same show everyday. is there anyways of expressing my feelings in a way that i will not turned out in the face?
thanks people, for your time.
I've been there when i was your age.
Basically, there are 2 paths to go:
1) Status quo, and lose nothing, but achieve nothing too.
2) Let her know of your feelings at the right time. If you think you're not good enough for her, then you need to increase your self-esteem. Don't have to read "Thick Face Black Heart", that's for unscrupulous businesspeople. Just read books that help you increase your confidence and see the worth in yourself.
Sometimes you learnt a lot from any rejection, and become a better person in the process.
When I was rejected by a girl at the age of 20, I thought I would hurt forever, but the hurt lasted but 2 months. -
Just continue to secretly love her and one day, one of these days... the feelings will disappear and even if you try, you will not get it back. You should treasure this instead of agonizing over it.Originally posted by fatone:i've stopped the stalking since the weekend and thank you all for your advise. however, it's not as easy to do what you guys preach. i just can't find or courage to tell her my feelings. i love her, but i don't want to lose this moment where i can secretly love her. if things goes awry, it's downhill for me buddies. i never dreamed in a million years i would be in such a mother fucking situation yet it's the same show everyday. is there anyways of expressing my feelings in a way that i will not turned out in the face?
thanks people, for your time. -
kill her. its for your own good
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maybe u are scared that the friendship with her will be lost if u express the love infuation for her.
BUt if u do not express, basically u have no chance and do u wan to do it secretly and i think u will get tired after a while.
tell her ur feeling
or is it maybe u like to be a secret admirer and then after a while the feeling will go away...
I dun know!
if u express the feeling, there is a higher chance of u and her being together.
u also have to retraint urself of stalking her, as gal are pretty scared of stalkers..
Maybe intiatied small conversation with her and try to be a friend to her first..
anyways good luck to u...
and u face rejection , u can try again or just give up...
it depends on the situation!
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How u all know TS name is low self-esteem? mebe his name is Fatone..
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0004909/
Anyhoo.... TS take heart... u r young, take this kind of ting beri serious... when u grow older, u will realised all this stuffs is damn childish n waste time... move on, got many nicer gals... hopefully u not those who want chio buz xmm only....
even if u got together wif tis gal, will u feel stress being wif her n have to endure comments like "wah, chio bu wif a ugly guy or fat guy" etc?
will u feel stress she will be snatch away?
just move on la... juz be frens oso good... love is not the end of the world... -
(liang tou fu)
even if u got together wif tis gal, will u feel stress being wif her n have to endure comments like "wah, chio bu wif a ugly guy or fat guy" etc?
acutally, in reality, most chio bus are always seen with fat/ugly/average guys.
very seldom got see chio bus with handsome hunks, except on TV, maybe.
last few weeks i saw 1.8+m tall ang-moh chick with hollywood actress face and blonde hair with 1.72+m tall asian nerd wearing specs.
u never know mah.
for all we know, TS in future will be bedding girls all over the world, and when he look back at now, he'll laugh. -
Aiyo, Ah fat kor kor, you are not doing yourself a good flavor, the gal hv bf liao, so stop your fantasy thinking lah, you dun want to destroy other pple relation rite, so be a good Ah, go for further study and forget about all these lah. Work hard and become a fat boss, that time, all gal will be running after you. Be Cool ya.Originally posted by fatone:there's a girl i am fond of at work, we're both 18. she's very close with her guy friend who i'm just hi-bye friends with. they're from the same sec school and now same poly. both stay same place also. the dude always goes out with her, i go out to lunch with her less than once a week. i feel extremely jealous and heart broken at the same time as she obviously treats him much better than even though i always wake up early to get her fav coffee from a place i don't want to disclose, every morning, period. i always give reasons like i accidently bought 2 cups or i was near the shop. sometimes i leave a cake and coffee on her table and the guy will claim to buy it. the guy obviously treats her like normal normal and even ask her to carry his bag sometimes. yes, i am not as good looking as him, he is average looking while i'm below average. i make it a point to make sure her desk is free from papers and stuffs when she comes to work, and always try to put a small teddy bear or rose on her table and act like coming in late so she won't suspect it's me. this goes on and on for the whole hols, and hols is ending soon. i fear we might not cross paths again, it'll be too much for me to take. every other day, i'd wear a jacket and follow them as they always leave work together. they always go down to vivo or cine, it makes me feel extremely insecure. i can safely presume they're not together yet but i don't know how long. i've camped under her block for days to see who she goes back with and the guy sends her back once in awhile. sleepless nights over my insecurities, i'm turning nuts. sometimes i think im crazy, am i just wasting my time? is there anyway out? i fear if i confess, being rejected is something i don't think i can handle.
please help me out, fellow brothers and sisters.
i try to fool myself thinking that i'm happy and she will not be with him, but to avail.
it feels like a laundry room. -
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eh, i did post something in here bfore.. oh sory..
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+1Originally posted by angel7030:Aiyo, Ah fat kor kor, you are not doing yourself a good flavor, the gal hv bf liao, so stop your fantasy thinking lah, you dun want to destroy other pple relation rite, so be a good Ah, go for further study and forget about all these lah. Work hard and become a fat boss, that time, all gal will be running after you. Be Cool ya. -
I don't think a girl being attached is a reason good enough to not chase her. Nothing venture nothing gain, plus if you are successful in your venture, remember she has to make the choice of you over her previous boyfriend - it is not your fault. Moreover, her previous boyfriend had a more advantageous position in preserving their relationship, so there should not be any guilt trip or ethical dilemma.
Chase her openly. If her boyfriend gets angry and defensive over it, just tell him to f-off because the girl is not his property regardless of the relationship. Only the girl gets to choose whether to allow you to continue courting her. -
hi fatone, most of us understand what emotional charge a person can get when one is in love with another. the feelings are un-controllable and one will keep thinking about the other person. I believe u are experiencing such emotions now.
some people are lucky because they get their partner on their first love attempt. many others are not so lucky. so you are not the odd one out.
As a word of advice, i think you should cool off and build up strength. the best way to do it is to play sports. look for activities to join such as your community clubs etc. sports is best. when u meet more people, you will slowly realize that she is not so special after all. -
Yes, Ah Pui kor kor, burn your fat into a CD and build more muscle yaOriginally posted by Daddy!!:hi fatone, most of us understand what emotional charge a person can get when one is in love with another. the feelings are un-controllable and one will keep thinking about the other person. I believe u are experiencing such emotions now.
some people are lucky because they get their partner on their first love attempt. many others are not so lucky. so you are not the odd one out.
As a word of advice, i think you should cool off and build up strength. the best way to do it is to play sports. look for activities to join such as your community clubs etc. sports is best. when u meet more people, you will slowly realize that she is not so special after all. -
Buy seed then plant it in scrotum, then u will hav another ball !Originally posted by DjMatrix:dude grow some balls, rejection is nothing but experience~ -
confess to her...