Problem zzz
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My boy and I patched somewhere 3 weeks back and we had this agreement.
He was to tell me when he was going out with his friends so as to prevent unwanted arguments over long waits of smses which usually lead to me being worried about his safety and sometimes, even frustration. Things went on fine the first few days/weeks as we spent our 'honeymoon' period together after being separated for a month. But recently, the same shit happens again.
He would go out with his friends till late night without letting me know. And I would usually assume that he's at home playing online games or sleeping. The first time he did it, he told me he has forgotten to tell me and apologised. I didnt kick up a fuss about the whole matter because, well. I thought it really slipped off his mind.
Just at the next day, he went out without telling me AGAIN. It pissed me off again as its just directly the next day and its unbelievable how he can forget things so easily. And moreover, I felt like he didnt seem to care about me again.
We msged this afternoon, but till now he hasnt replied my sms. I am suspecting he is out with his friends again without telling me. I dont know how will I react when I receive his sms. I really dont think I deserve such a treatment. It hurts me too, because it seems to me that he has the mindset of, "Aiya, its okay if she's angry lah. Just sweet talk her will do. She will SURELY forgive me."
Is sending an sms just to inform me that difficult? I dont need him to tell me about his every single movement, I just want to know that he's not home.
Is it really that difficult? Guys? -
he go toilet need to inform you??
Why he go out with friends need to tell you!!?!? omg -
"I dont need him to tell me about his every single movement, I just want to know that he's not home. "Originally posted by necrolyt3:he go toilet need to inform you??
Why he go out with friends need to tell you!!?!? omg
Read. -
Well don't expect your boyfriend to sms u everywhere he goes everytime.
BUT!
if he didn't sms you and u did sms him asking him.
I think it's a courtesy to reply that he's out with friends and busy.
Ignoring a sms is bad. Ignoring a sms from GF is worse.
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agreed.Originally posted by ad3285:Well don't expect your boyfriend to sms u everywhere he goes everytime.
BUT!
if he didn't sms you and u did sms him asking him.
I think it's a courtesy to reply that he's out with friends and busy.
Ignoring a sms is bad. Ignoring a sms from GF is worse.
or maybe he is scare dat u will be worried when he goes out late in the nite, therefore he didnt tell u.
sometimes ur boy might be busy if he didnt reply u during the day? -
You have just encountered a thing called "Habit". I think he is not in a habit to SMS you when he is not home. I suppose you will just have to be patient for him to catch another habit and persistent with your patience.
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come on, give him that space, what is this must inform every movement crap....i would dump you for being that choking....get a life will ya.....this is exactly the reason why many guys lose friends the moment that get hitched....
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I told him to make this a habit, he said okay. But he doesnt seem to be trying AT ALL. He knows that I will be worried, we have argued umpteen times because of this matter. Why cant he just develop the mindset that I will be worried? I would rather he tell me. It just irks me a lot. Is it THAT difficult?Originally posted by aremeis:You have just encountered a thing called "Habit". I think he is not in a habit to SMS you when he is not home. I suppose you will just have to be patient for him to catch another habit and persistent with your patience. -
I mentioned that I need not him to inform me about his EVERY movement. Read carefully.Originally posted by countdracula:come on, give him that space, what is this must inform every movement crap....i would dump you for being that choking....get a life will ya.....this is exactly the reason why many guys lose friends the moment that get hitched.... -
I am a girl. I can tell you this - you are not his wife. You are his girlfriend. Until you become his wife, you better not continue doing what you do - most men do not like reporting all their actions . To him, it means you don't trust him.Originally posted by fgfm:My boy and I patched somewhere 3 weeks back and we had this agreement.
He was to tell me when he was going out with his friends so as to prevent unwanted arguments over long waits of smses which usually lead to me being worried about his safety and sometimes, even frustration. Things went on fine the first few days/weeks as we spent our 'honeymoon' period together after being separated for a month. But recently, the same shit happens again.
He would go out with his friends till late night without letting me know. And I would usually assume that he's at home playing online games or sleeping. The first time he did it, he told me he has forgotten to tell me and apologised. I didnt kick up a fuss about the whole matter because, well. I thought it really slipped off his mind.
Just at the next day, he went out without telling me AGAIN. It pissed me off again as its just directly the next day and its unbelievable how he can forget things so easily. And moreover, I felt like he didnt seem to care about me again.
We msged this afternoon, but till now he hasnt replied my sms. I am suspecting he is out with his friends again without telling me. I dont know how will I react when I receive his sms. I really dont think I deserve such a treatment. It hurts me too, because it seems to me that he has the mindset of, "Aiya, its okay if she's angry lah. Just sweet talk her will do. She will SURELY forgive me."
Is sending an sms just to inform me that difficult? I dont need him to tell me about his every single movement, I just want to know that he's not home.
Is it really that difficult? Guys?
Even if a guy does this to me what you are doing to your bf , I will dump him after I get pretty bored and irritated. Actually that happened before. So yeah there you go. -
Originally posted by fymk:
If I am his wife, I would know when he's out and when he's not. But you are right, I am not. I just want to know whether he's home and not. I dont need him to report ALL his actions to me.
I am a girl. I can tell you this - [b]you are not his wife. You are his girlfriend. Until you become his wife, you better not continue doing what you do - most men do not like reporting all their actions . To him, it means you don't trust him.[/b] -
I am being very frank here. No offence.Originally posted by fgfm:If I am his wife, I would know when he's out and when he's not. But you are right, I am not. I just want to know whether he's home and not. I dont need him to report ALL his actions to me.
No you don't need to know whether he's home or not. Just trust him to let you know. He is not a child and you are not his mother.
What you are doing is ,in fact, tracking him - even if you don't need him to report all his actions to you. -
But the thing again...Is that he agreed. Shouldnt he the least try to keep to his promises?
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As a guy, wanting your bf to tell you whenever he's not home is a quick way to lose him. Guys hate this. Some even hate this when it's their wife doing it. You're not even his wife yet so I suggest you stop. Besides, don't you trust him?Originally posted by fgfm:If I am his wife, I would know when he's out and when he's not. But you are right, I am not. I just want to know whether he's home and not. I dont need him to report ALL his actions to me. -
All I want is a reason for me to know why he aint replying to my smses as quickly as he usually would?Originally posted by jondizzle foshizzle:As a guy, wanting your bf to tell you whenever he's not home is a quick way to lose him. Guys hate this. Some even hate this when it's their wife doing it. You're not even his wife yet so I suggest you stop. Besides, don't you trust him? -
Oy vey.Originally posted by fgfm:But the thing again...Is that he agreed. Shouldnt he the least try to keep to his promises?
He can forget sometimes. Do you expect him to report to you when he is at home or not all the time?
Is this a relationship or a contract?
Have a good think about it. -
He forgets EVERYTIME.Originally posted by fymk:Oy vey.
He can forget sometimes. Do you expect him to report to you when he is at home or not all the time?
Is this a relationship or a contract?
Have a good think about it. -
If next time I have a gf, this wouldn't be a problem for me.
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Why?Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:If next time I have a gf, this wouldn't be a problem for me. -
He doesn't have to report to you. Trust me guys hate these kinds of girls, they call them control b*tches. If you want to stay in relationships I really strongly suggest you stop.Originally posted by fgfm:He forgets EVERYTIME. -
To add on...What if he goes out without telling me and something happens to him? I would continue assuming that he is busy at home when maybe he is already on the way to heaven. If he's at home, the chances of him falling into a mishap would be much smaller or practically zilch. And if he's not replying my sms, I would know that he's asleep/doing stuffs at home.Originally posted by fymk:Oy vey.
He can forget sometimes. Do you expect him to report to you when he is at home or not all the time?
Is this a relationship or a contract?
Have a good think about it. -
You're not his mother. There's no need to be overprotective.Originally posted by fgfm:To add on...What if he goes out without telling me and something happens to him? I would continue assuming that he is busy at home when maybe he is already on the way to heaven. If he's at home, the chances of him falling into a mishap would be much smaller or practically zilch. And if he's not replying my sms, I would know that he's asleep/doing stuffs at home. -
What if I tell you that that I am closer to him as compared to his family members?Originally posted by jondizzle foshizzle:You're not his mother. There's no need to be overprotective. -
Because I know that my future girlfriend doing all this is out of concern. I guess so is you. I don't mind sending SMSes to her telling my location.Originally posted by fgfm:Why?
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Thanks. I am worried sick right now...Sigh.Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:Because I know that my future girlfriend doing all this is out of concern. I guess so is you. I don't mind sending SMSes to her telling my location.