Originally posted by Yuki~!:
Dear AA,
I'm 16 going on 17 this year and I've been attached to my bf for almost a year now
I think that he's no good for me but I just can't say no to him.
[b]1. He distracts me from my studies
He doesn't really encourage me to study. Even when my very important O levels were nearing, we often quarrel because I wanted to study and he wouldn't let me because he didn't want to end our phone conversation. For that, my studies has gone down the drain. I just wish he could be a little more supportive. I hate to quarrel with him.
2. He constantly spends my money
He's always broke & always asking me to pay for things, saying that "Money is meant to be spent". He would plead with me to lend him money & I ALWAYS give it to him. & He almost never returns the money I lend him. I spent more than a $1000 on him last year.
3. He ABUSES me
He verbally abuses me. When we fight, he would scold me vulgarities (eg: calling me a f***ing b****) and humiliate me, if he got the chance. When I told him I want to break up with him, he would threaten me, saying that "he would make my life hell". He also threatened to tell my dirty secrets to the world.
4. He's ruining his own future
He's retained in Secondary 3 for the 2nd time this year. I, as a girlfriend, feel a little ashamed when my friends asks me why my boyfriend is 17 and still in school. He constantly skips school (& tells me to do so too, sometimes). I try to tuition him and wake him up every morning to make sure he goes to school but my efforts usually goes to waste when I get his report book. I mean, if he wants to marry me in the future (that's what he claims), how on earth can he support me?
5. He's violent & bad-tempered
I'm afraid to make him really, very angry. I mean, he gets angry over the most ridiculous things. There was this one time, during a fight, he pushed me & I fell backwards. I cried my eyes out but he didn't give a damn. Several times he used sharp objects to scare me so that I give in to our little argument, eg: Beer bottle & razor
I feel very lost as I really have a lot of feelings for this guy. But he really bullies me. In short, he is a delinquent & I know I have become one, too, under his influence. But I want to change because it's a new year & I want to go to Poly to start things fresh.
How can I say no to this guy who's still is Sec 3 this year & isn't at the same level of thinking as me? Is there any way I can turn him around? See the way I see things? I feel that if I break up with him, I'll regret because I love him a lot. He told me many times that he really loves me a lot. But why do I feel otherwise? Please help 
[/b]
he is seriously contradicting himself. saying he loves you yet doing things that do not AT ALL show that he loves you. what for do you love him if he is treating you in such a manner?
Do you have any good frens or any elder brother [esp. impt] who can help/advise you in talking things out with that guy and protect you if anything happens? [such as avoiding going out alone, esp at night. get a family member to pei you if you're going home from busstop/MRT after dusk] that is VERY impt if he tries to get verbally violent or abusive when you are FIRM on cutting away from him. if he attempts violence and injures you, call the police immediately. show no mercy. already, his act of using a razor to scare you amounts to harassment
ohya, change your number ASAP and only let your close friends/family know. tell them not to be in contact with him, at all.
In the first place, you decide to attach to him cause of feelings?
Edit: more pointers added after reading through.
YESYES