Henpecked Guys / Boyfriends / Husbands
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Originally posted by Hanagata:
what's wrong in helping your gf holding handbag?
there's nothing wrong at least to me... but if the handbag is super girly type... how? -
Originally posted by Rednano:
there's nothing wrong at least to me... but if the handbag is super girly type... how?
If you are willing to carry then go all the way to do it. If not double standard. So many guys in this thread agree in carrying gfs' handbags, you can ask how they help to carry the girly type of bags. -
Originally posted by Fantagf:
If you are willing to carry then go all the way to do it. If not double standard. So many guys in this thread agree in carrying gfs' handbags, you can ask how they help to carry the girly type of bags.
okay, handbags aside, then what about other issues? -
people see you carry also understandable also one mah.... unless you also dress like girly then people might think you are bapok lor
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Originally posted by Rednano:
okay, handbags aside, then what about other issues?
what other issue are you refering? -
Hmm, I offer to carry shopping bags and stuff for my ex, but not hangbags unless its heavy etc. She's quite demanding and expects to be treated like a princess but at the very start of the rlsp, I made it clear to her that I can never be like her uncle (not exactly henpecked, but is at his wife's beck and call).
I believe that if a girl doesn't set too high expectations, its easy to impress her and keep her happy in a relationship. Else she would prob take what you've done for granted.
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Originally posted by IR:
Hmm, I offer to carry shopping bags and stuff for my ex, but not hangbags unless its heavy etc. She's quite demanding and expects to be treated like a princess but at the very start of the rlsp, I made it clear to her that I can never be like her uncle (not exactly henpecked, but is at his wife's beck and call).
I believe that if a girl doesn't set too high expectations, its easy to impress her and keep her happy in a relationship. Else she would prob take what you've done for granted.
I agree with you.
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carry bag can.
but to be 100% obedient, sry hor, cannot.
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Originally posted by Rednano:
although i might look stupid to other guys who might thinking like 'this guy lost his masculinity', i DO enjoy carrying her handbags and stuff. but sometimes, the handbags r just too girly in a way... pink with those cute dolls. lol... heheI think it is nice if they offer, but I won't ever let any guy carry my handbag, esp if it looks super feminine or kawaii. LOL. I don't think it look good on them.
Originally posted by angel7030:
No lah, me still in courtship, this is what my grandma told me. She said in a woman love, courtship is the most wonderful part, cherish it, and if next time your bf become yr husband, do not expect him to behave as per courtship love, many gals do not understand this natural effect, thus most end up thinking that their husband no more love them.The most common phrase out of a woman mouth to her husband is,
" Why last time you can, why now you cannot??" "you hv changed", that is what i heard my aunty saying to my Uncle
To say truth, I hope the man I will eventually marry be as consistent as his behaviour during courtship. That is also the reason why some girls are turn off when the guys are super-showy during courtship. They don't feel their attraction will last and hence they are not attracted to such guys in the first place.
I understand the compel to impress, but for a long term partner, it's best to see how someone behave under normal circumstances too. Hence how he treats others, and then in comparision how he treats you during courtship is, imho, a very important factor to take note of.
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Originally posted by CrabbyShaSha:
I think it is nice if they offer, but I won't ever let any guy carry my handbag, esp if it looks super feminine or kawaii. LOL. I don't think it look good on them.
To say truth, I hope the man I will eventually marry be as consistent as his behaviour during courtship. That is also the reason why some girls are turn off when the guys are super-showy during courtship. They don't feel their attraction will last and hence they are not attracted to such guys in the first place.
I understand the compel to impress, but for a long term partner, it's best to see how someone behave under normal circumstances too. Hence how he treats others, and then in comparision how he treats you during courtship is, imho, a very important factor to take note of.
Precisely, guys carrying handbags don't look good, that is why I don't let bf or any guy friends carry my handbags. It is more for positive reason I don't let them carry handbags, don't know why most react so negatively. They want to help to carry bags, carry shopping bags, luggage, utility bags, are OK. -
then how to differentiate doting and respecting and showing she's truly important and being henpecked?
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Originally posted by lenore:
then how to differentiate doting and respecting and showing she's truly important and being henpecked?
in chinese, it mostly means 怕è€�婆 , or 妻å�管得严 for some.
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Originally posted by MS:
I have a friend who has an absolutely mad gf. She is extremely possessive. My friend is not allowed to fetch another girl even out of convenience or out of pure gentlemanly assistance. She yells at him in the public before me "He's like this one! So useless!" My friend bowed his head in shame when she did that.
When my friend need to run an errand and he's not bringing her along because he's going to the workshop which is dusty, hot and boring. she yelled at him and sent him a reply on his phone 'F*CK YOU!'
When I fetched a girl to meet our friends on a major outing since she stays near to me and the only logical choice is for me to fetch her instead of the others. I went to sit at the other table with my friend and my female friend also came along out of courtesy. My friend's gf saw it and forbids her bf to associate with me anymore. Because she thinks I am unfaithful to my gf.
She wants to stick around him wherever he goes and throws her temper whenever she wants regardless of the environment and timing.
Because of her, I have almost lost contact with my friend. But he secretly contacts me via phone sometimes to chat with me.
Such guys and girls exist. What can we do when both are willing parties.
Geez. Someday, he'll lose his cool. Or he'll suddenly become cool -
Originally posted by Rednano:
in chinese, it means 怕è€�婆 or 妻å�管得严
Some Chinese believe fear wife will bring luck to the husband -
lolz i dun mind my hubby carrying shopping bags for me, but I kinda mind when he carries my more girly looking type of bag.
Like I have this bag with bright stripes and I usually use it to put my clothes for my weekend stayover in his house...when he saw me he would insist on carrying it for me, so I will let him carry...but I would feel a bit uneasy cos I think it is a bit weird for guys to carry such a brightly-colored bag. But I told him let me carry he wouldn't cos said it is too heavy...so oh well...
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Originally posted by Rednano:
in chinese, it mostly means 怕è€�婆 , or 妻å�管得严 for some.
hmmm, that might be her way of showing she cares alot.
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Originally posted by lenore:
hmmm, that might be her way of showing she cares alot.
Shall the husband also "care a lot"? -
Originally posted by Fantagf:
Precisely, guys carrying handbags don't look good, that is why I don't let bf or any guy friends carry my handbags. It is more for positive reason I don't let them carry handbags, don't know why most react so negatively. They want to help to carry bags, carry shopping bags, luggage, utility bags, are OK.Originally posted by rainee:lolz i dun mind my hubby carrying shopping bags for me, but I kinda mind when he carries my more girly looking type of bag.
Like I have this bag with bright stripes and I usually use it to put my clothes for my weekend stayover in his house...when he saw me he would insist on carrying it for me, so I will let him carry...but I would feel a bit uneasy cos I think it is a bit weird for guys to carry such a brightly-colored bag. But I told him let me carry he wouldn't cos said it is too heavy...so oh well...
I think the thing is, the guy is just trying to show that he can be useful to you in this sense ba, Fantagf. Guys generally (imo) like to help girls, so if he really insist, then I guess let him be. Maybe, it might help to let those guys know that you think it doesn't look macho for them but you are very glad that he's offered his help and that is enough (bu shi bu yao ta bang mang). Next time got heavy things sure call him to come and help! Maybe that might make him happier instead of causing him to be so negative? Maybe they are used to helping girls carry their handbags so they feel rebuffed when you rejected them? Well... just a thought...
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Originally posted by Rednano:
in chinese, it mostly means 怕è€�婆 , or 妻å�管得严 for some.
I think that is actually a sign of insecurity from those wives.
Originally posted by Beautiful951:
Shall the husband also "care a lot"?Therefore, essentially, those husbands DO have to care a lot. Not blindly being submissive to her of course, but make her relax and understand where her insecurity stems from so that she can let go of being so controlling.
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Originally posted by CrabbyShaSha:
I think the thing is, the guy is just trying to show that he can be useful to you in this sense ba, Fantagf. Guys generally (imo) like to help girls, so if he really insist, then I guess let him be. Maybe, it might help to let those guys know that you think it doesn't look macho for them but you are very glad that he's offered his help and that is enough (bu shi bu yao ta bang mang). Next time got heavy things sure call him to come and help! Maybe that might make him happier instead of causing him to be so negative? Maybe they are used to helping girls carry their handbags so they feel rebuffed when you rejected them? Well... just a thought...
Hello, when I said negative I am referring to the reaction shown in this thread. So far those guys are OK, no prob about this issue.
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Originally posted by CrabbyShaSha:
I think the thing is, the guy is just trying to show that he can be useful to you in this sense ba, Fantagf. Guys generally (imo) like to help girls, so if he really insist, then I guess let him be. Maybe, it might help to let those guys know that you think it doesn't look macho for them but you are very glad that he's offered his help and that is enough (bu shi bu yao ta bang mang). Next time got heavy things sure call him to come and help! Maybe that might make him happier instead of causing him to be so negative? Maybe they are used to helping girls carry their handbags so they feel rebuffed when you rejected them? Well... just a thought...
No la, never rebuffed him...just felt uneasy nia. I always thanked him and said he is so good to me...
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Originally posted by Beautiful951:
Shall the husband also "care a lot"?hmmm on one hand, it can been seen as caring alot. on the other hand, it might be seen as stifling. so i guess it's subjective. hmmm, or can it be put in this way - that generally some females might be abit insecure that is why they wanna "control" the guys because they don't wanna lose them? whereas generally, guys might not have an insecurity issue?
hmmm, i'm not saying all females or all guys are like that la.
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Originally posted by Fantagf:
Hello, when I said negative I am referring to the reaction shown in this thread. So far those guys are OK, no prob about this issue.
Oh..
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Originally posted by rainee:
No la, never rebuffed him...just felt uneasy nia. I always thanked him and said he is so good to me...
fwah... you so xing fu *envious*
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buddies will never understand why we run to our girls when they call until they get one themselves.