Would you go back to your ex- after breakup for 2 years?
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I have a friend who has broken up with his ex-gf of 8 years about 2 years ago. The girl is the one who suggested the breakup, and the reason being he is just not a good bf to her after knowing each other for more than 10 years. When they broke up, the guy was devastated and has tried all means to get her back, but she was so cruel that she even rejected his proposal to get married. Now ... 2 years later, she came back to him and asked him back, he... on the other hand felt that he has owed her, as he has not been a good bf when they were together. He is a very responsible person and very loyal to who he loved. Therefore he decided to get back together with her.
I felt that this is so unfair to the guy, as I've seen how he got hurt when they broke up... Just because she is not able to find another bf during these 2 years, or maybe she is already 34 this year ... or for whatever reason, she decided to take him back. What do you all think?
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coz she her prime is over
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Originally posted by Life is a mystery:
I have a friend who has broken up with his ex-gf of 8 years about 2 years ago. The girl is the one who suggested the breakup, and the reason being he is just not a good bf to her after knowing each other for more than 10 years. When they broke up, the guy was devastated and has tried all means to get her back, but she was so cruel that she even rejected his proposal to get married. Now ... 2 years later, she came back to him and asked him back, he... on the other hand felt that he has owed her, as he has not been a good bf when they were together. He is a very responsible person and very loyal to who he loved. Therefore he decided to get back together with her.
I felt that this is so unfair to the guy, as I've seen how he got hurt when they broke up... Just because she is not able to find another bf during these 2 years, or maybe she is already 34 this year ... or for whatever reason, she decided to take him back. What do you all think?
What were her reasons for leaving him?
He fell short of her expectations in what ways?
No one will marry someone they didn't love so she wasn't cruel to reject his proposal. Besides, salvaging a failed relationship through marriage wouldn't have worked in his interest either.
I think this has less more to do with your friend and less to do with his 34yo ex. He should learn to act in his own interest before taking the plunge again.
If, like you said, he wants to revive this failed relationship out of obligation, he has serious issues to straighten out.
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Time will tell u everything.
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as long as that guy feels he's happy.
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you have to know why one got back with each other. once you know the reasons, then you can decide right or wrong
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Love is never fair.
I have a sec sch friend whom after one round of dating and finding the right person, ended up marrying his first gf and now they have a happy family with 1 kid.
If the guy still feels for the girl and likewise for the girl, if she feels that he is still the one for her then I don't think there's anything wrong getting back together. Ultimately if they don't get married then at least they have tried.
Age is not exactly an issue here I guess. 34 still considered not very old.
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it's love. it makes people do funny things.
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solechip -
her reason of leaving him was he is not a good bf, he is not caring enough even she has gave him many chances to improve. I believe a girl will not make a rush decision to leave a 8 yrs relationship, unless she has really thought thru this and is a strong decision that she made.
Oh well... maybe times will tell.
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Eh - you are not involved with either the guy or the girl right?
Then as third party - better don't judge what is fair what is not fair.
Ultimately, you will never truly understand the relationship between the two of them and how/what it really is about.
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Originally posted by Life is a mystery:
solechip -
her reason of leaving him was he is not a good bf, he is not caring enough even she has gave him many chances to improve. I believe a girl will not make a rush decision to leave a 8 yrs relationship, unless she has really thought thru this and is a strong decision that she made.
Oh well... maybe times will tell.
If your friend wants a second opinion about his relationship, like you, I'll be tempted to share my views.
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is his decision ultimately..
as long as he is happy after patching things up with her..then there's nothing else that others can said about it right?
as a friend..the best u can do is to give him your ulmost support..
but no harm telling him about what you feel about the whole issue..at least..he can have 1 more opinion to consider to when he is with her..
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Originally posted by soleachip:
If your friend wants a second opinion about his relationship, like you, I'll be tempted to share my views.
Why don't you share yours and I'll share mine?
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Unfortunately, I'm involved with the guy. We sort of have a relationship, but we are not committed to each other. As I know he has never forget about her, and always want to get back together with her. I knew that this day will come, that's why we had a mutual agreement of not committing to each other. I do love him and even though I know I cannot be with him, I don't want to see him being hurt again. He still listen to my advice, but I'm in such an awkward situation to give him advice. That's why i wanna know if I'm being bias... or I'm giving him truthful advice.
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Love hurts. That's the truth.
He's bound to get hurt every now and then. Maybe not in the near future but who know what will happen 10 years later?
Maybe you should ask him to stop asking you for advices and give you your deserved space to breathe and give himself the chance to be independent. You cant be there for him all the time, yea?
We dont know what's really going through both their minds cause' ultimately, we're not them. Thus, it gives us not much rights to comment on how they should go about in their relationship. Well, it's their relationship afterall. Whatever problems they have, it's really up to them to work things out.
You are really brave and I admire your courage. =)
Live for yourself. Not for him.
You deserve a much better guy!
=D
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u think ma..
but u dun reli noe the actual and real reason behind everything..
u r not them, so u wont noe..
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she just dont want to spend a lone v.day..that's all..dont think so much..
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i would, but not cos i owe, but cos i wan.
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hard to say. I think the main thing to look at is based on what criteria did she think of him not as a good boyfriend years ago.
If he still has not fulfilled those criterias yet then I think it be a better choice not to get together again in the first place.
They are bound to be caught up in the same problem again.
Just my two cents worth..
Gary from http://name1price.com
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Yawnz... boring!!
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the girl i like for 10 mths.. just gone back to her ex after 2 years of breakup.. so therefore i think its possible. Well, treat it as i am answering on her behalf XD
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Originally posted by Life is a mystery:
I have a friend who has broken up with his ex-gf of 8 years about 2 years ago. The girl is the one who suggested the breakup, and the reason being he is just not a good bf to her after knowing each other for more than 10 years. When they broke up, the guy was devastated and has tried all means to get her back, but she was so cruel that she even rejected his proposal to get married. Now ... 2 years later, she came back to him and asked him back, he... on the other hand felt that he has owed her, as he has not been a good bf when they were together. He is a very responsible person and very loyal to who he loved. Therefore he decided to get back together with her.
I felt that this is so unfair to the guy, as I've seen how he got hurt when they broke up... Just because she is not able to find another bf during these 2 years, or maybe she is already 34 this year ... or for whatever reason, she decided to take him back. What do you all think?
I think LOVE itself is GREAT and BEAUTIFUL, and this is a good example of how they do not allow their love to be affected by the comments and thoughts from narrow-minded people like yourself.If you are one of their friend, then you should learn to play your own role right and do the right thing by giving them your well-blessings and best wishes and congratulations.
Because I don't think you would've understood why your friend have chosen to understand this decision to be together again with his ex-gf....not even if you were your friend in the similar situation.
LOVE does conquers all you know.
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Originally posted by parn:
I think LOVE itself is GREAT and BEAUTIFUL, and this is a good example of how they do not allow their love to be affected by the comments and thoughts from narrow-minded people like yourself.If you are one of their friend, then you should learn to play your own role right and do the right thing by giving them your well-blessings and best wishes and congratulations.
Because I don't think you would've understood why your friend have chosen to understand this decision to be together again with his ex-gf....not even if you were your friend in the similar situation.
LOVE does conquers all you know.
love is selfish too.. some people have to sacrificed so that other's love be fulfilled
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Originally posted by Babelfish:
love is selfish too.. some people have to sacrificed so that other's love be fulfilled
It's not only called selfish, but it is also necessary to be selfish in order for your loved ones to feel cherished. -
Originally posted by parn:
It's not only called selfish, but it is also necessary to be selfish in order for your loved ones to feel cherished.ya.. haiz.. come to think of it.. i am really disappointed.. all this while waiting for her and hoping that she will accept me.. Suddenly know that she went back to her ex. Its hard to digest, just could not accept it in the 1st place.. Also her bf of a opposite race, even more shocking. Call me racist or what, i am just not used to seeing her going out, kissing and having sex with a bf of a opposite race. Sry