Worst vday, help.
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erm. Break up with this guy ASAP.
With the way he is.. either he nag u till u BTH and jump off a building. Or one day he is gonna turn u into pulp thinking u deserve it.
With the way he is, even seoti is a much better bf, even if he sucks.
=X
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My dear young lady, after reading what you have posted, I somehow felt that you really need to decide for yourself what sort of boyfriend you want in yr relationship. Of course being in love or wanting to be loved it’s a good feeling but giving up love is worst of all . Should you feel that there would be love existing in yr relationship, then abuse won’t not take place at all, especially receiving abuse from your loved ones. Also, should you questioned yrself , how you valued yr relationship with dat abusive guy , despite all the hittings he gave to you , do you still think it is worthwhile to be with this guy for the rest of yr decades with him , if he promise to marry you one day ? Not point of getting police involve unless you wants to go further to prosectuate him , getting all your time spent just to get him with all the legal proceedings , to be honest. Rem. You’re still young and I believe he is just one of yr passing time BF, trust me. Few yrs down the road you’ll find a better one than this . Good night
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My dear young lady, after reading what you have posted, I somehow felt that you really need to decide for yourself what sort of boyfriend you want in yr relationship. Of course being in love or wanting to be loved it’s a good feeling but giving up love is worst of all . Should you feel that there would be love existing in yr relationship, then abuse won’t not take place at all, especially receiving abuse from your loved ones. Also, should you questioned yrself , how you valued yr relationship with dat abusive guy , despite all the hittings he gave to you , do you still think it is worthwhile to be with this guy for the rest of yr decades with him , if he promise to marry you one day ? Not point of getting police involve unless you wants to go further to prosectuate him , getting all your time spent just to get him with all the legal proceedings , to be honest. Rem. You’re still young and I believe he is just one of yr passing time BF, trust me. Few yrs down the road you’ll find a better one than this . Good night
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Omg you should srsly break with that guy. A guy who beats a girl is not a guy at all...
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Originally posted by nOrmalbOi:
erm. Break up with this guy ASAP.
With the way he is.. either he nag u till u BTH and jump off a building. Or one day he is gonna turn u into pulp thinking u deserve it.
With the way he is, even seoti is a much better bf, even if he sucks.
=X
Wtf. why drag me in sia? hahahaha.
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My poor girl, if he can use physical violence against you within months in a relationship, what makes you think that you wont be a walking bruise in a few years to come?
Break off with that guy, he's simply not worth it.
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well obviously u noe the ultimate ans to ur troubles.
or else ur story wouldnt be so long rite?
in my best opinion: love=understanding+trust+caring+patience.
ur relationship is lackin all these factors n taking a wrong turn
think deeply, if lust/affection r the only reasons tat make u relunctant to leave....
DUN DO TAT, cos tat will make u suffer in agonies n regrets for the rest of ur life......
ALL u need is tat extra courage to tell in his face tat "I DUN NEED U IN MY LIFE ANYMORE" tat extra step is to pave ur happier life.
YES u love him but DOes HIm?
IF yes why is he hurtin u physically n mentally even u dun enjoy even the slightest of it?
Well, if u think the power of love for him can surpass ur own LIFE. Be our guest, cos it is STILL ur choice, unless u take action to salvage ur miseries.
TAKe care, from the deepest of my heart, i hope u will find ur true happiness n be strong
Best regards,
MUmmy Jo
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So many advices now. So which path you wanna take now is up to you . Yeah we can only support you
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he abused you physically, you abused him emotionally.
using words like "break up" as a threat to win an argument whenever you are not happy - you are emotionally abusing him
he physically abuse you, quite obvious.
so both of you are abusing each other.
i suggest you don't point fingers, TS, you're at fault too, but he is more at fault. i suggest you break up with him
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Originally posted by deathman:
i'm not contacting him yet because i know his reply will make me melt, again. you wanna know his side of story? he thinks that i'm a girl who say break easily and treat our r/s like a toy. he thinks that i'm a very petty girlfriend who gets angry over the slightest thing. in actual fact, i trust that he loves me. its his temper and character. but this kind of love, i can't accept. he changed alot compared to the past but it just came back yesterday. i dont know if its the influence of his friend, ts, who i mentioned above. but i know i'm not gg to give in anymore.
hmm. a bad tempered person will not change that easily.
but i think it's true, that you use the word break up too flippantly. you should never threaten anyone in a relationship, you either accept that person as he is, or don't be in the relationship at all.
if you say break up - mean it, don't use it as a game.
and yes, i feel that girls generally are petty.
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poor girl. if i were the guy, i would shower my girl with loads of love. beating and shouting at a lady is real ungentleman. it's the most ugly side of a man hitting a woman.
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Yea man, break up with him. And if he tries anything funny, call the police and let him have it.
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u deserve someone better
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real man don touch women tad way. . .
leave leave leave. . . . -
Originally posted by lowkks:
poor girl. if i were the guy, i would shower my girl with loads of love. beating and shouting at a lady is real ungentleman. it's the most ugly side of a man hitting a woman.
takes two to clap.
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Dun let your heart rule over your mind.. Usually when that happen, good things wun happen so ya u choose.
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Originally posted by deathman:
hello all. i really need comments and advice on my r/s. i'll just summarise my dramatic love life. my bf and i have been tgt for 3 years. after months tgt, he showed his true colours by being abusive to me whenever he got angry or when we quarrel. abusive act like punching and scratching which happens in public too. i gave him alot of chances by forgiving him until a day when i couldnt tolerate, i initiated a break up. he got worried and told me all those stuffs that he'll change and so, i went back to him. it became such a habit that whenever we quarrel, i will always say break because the thinking that he will only be afraid of break up is there. however for the past 6mths, he stopped his abusive act. my cousins and aunt and friends knew about it because its really hard to hide my sadness and thoughts when i know there're there for me and the bruises, scratches are obvious.
yesterday, a love festival, i guess i'm the only pathetic one. everything went well but not the night. we were at esplanade for some chattings and theres a mini concert so we sat and listen. after some time, he told me that his friend would be meeting him over at his place and he is alr there. so we left the concert after about 2-3songs sang. but its true that the songs sang were boring for us. we went to the bus stop and waited for bus. then he suggested taking train which he will never because he always wanna spend more time tgt. he claimed that because the weather is humid and train will be faster and train might have seats. the thing is bus got higher chances to get seats because train is gonna be damn squeezy and going home by bus takes abt 35mins and train-then-bus is gonna take 45mins. i got no idea why he suggested this but to conclude that he wanna meet his friend sooner. which girl will be happy when your bf is rushing to leave you for his friends? however after he explained while shouting, i understood and wasnt angry anymore. but he still kept repeating saying that i'm very petty and said out all the past where i'm petty and always saying break easily. i didn't shout out the abusive part is alr being kind enough. i didnt talk back because i dont wanna further embarrass ourselves not knowing that he just kept repeating non stop, even till we got up the bus. alot of people were looking at us and i really felt like a pathetic shit. when we were up the bus, he continued saying non stop and its real loud that ppl can hear me and stuff. keep saying that im petty and alr 19 yrs old still saying break all the time (do you have any idea who made me do this)? alll he wanna do is to embarrass me but he didnt know he is embarrassing himself even more. he even go to the extent to insult my family. he is 20, who is childish here? he whined for real long till i say 'stop repeating alr can', he gave me 2 scratches on my neck. it hurts yes, but my heart definitely hurt more. i dont know if i should forgive him.
Just a day ago, he told me one of our friend, ts, whacked his gf real hard with alot of blood on the face and body. he kicked, punched, slapped and all. he said he is guilty, but the girl deserved it. he said i deserve it too. and he added, with the tone i give when quarreling and the unhappy face i give, i will get punches from him someday. what should i do? he is alr hinting me. i dont know if i can still trust him anymore. because i dont want the past to repeat, i suffered enough in the past.
i had enough. people keep advicing me to leave him but because i know i still love him, i dont have the heart to really ignore him and break up. i kept forgiving while the phrase 'leopard never changes its spot' is reflecting in my mind.
i am real clueless and have no idea what to do. i havent been contacting him since last night, can anyone help?
I read in Newpaper the other day that there is a Date Violence Help group around in Facebook or something, you might want to check it out for some support from people who experienced what you are going through.
My personal take is that any guy who does not respect his partner and used or wants to use violence on the very person he proclaims to love, does not deserve anybody's love. Such a person does not know how to love. Please leave him asap.
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what age ah?
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Originally posted by eagle:
what age ah?
19 -
physical abuse sux =.=''' why are u still with him??
if he loves u, he won't even bear to let u hurt..
moreover, he already said that "u deserve the punches blah blah"..is sooner or later that he might throw u punches until u bleed like nobody's business..
moreover, u r still so young..such a bright & long future in front of u..are u still that u want to stick to him..get married to him? endure all the physical abuse that he hurl on u (& the children)?..
by the time, it might be abit too late to leave him bah..still must go through divorce, fight for children's custody etc..waste of $$ & time..
u should know it in your heart that he is not the guy whom u can entrust yourself to..
æ£æ‰€è°“, 男怕入错行,女怕å«�错郎...
19 should be a age whereby u are mature enough to think for yourself..what's good for u & what's not..
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Originally posted by deathman:
hello all. i really need comments and advice on my r/s. i'll just summarise my dramatic love life. my bf and i have been tgt for 3 years. after months tgt, he showed his true colours by being abusive to me whenever he got angry or when we quarrel. abusive act like punching and scratching which happens in public too. i gave him alot of chances by forgiving him until a day when i couldnt tolerate, i initiated a break up. he got worried and told me all those stuffs that he'll change and so, i went back to him. it became such a habit that whenever we quarrel, i will always say break because the thinking that he will only be afraid of break up is there. however for the past 6mths, he stopped his abusive act. my cousins and aunt and friends knew about it because its really hard to hide my sadness and thoughts when i know there're there for me and the bruises, scratches are obvious.
yesterday, a love festival, i guess i'm the only pathetic one. everything went well but not the night. we were at esplanade for some chattings and theres a mini concert so we sat and listen. after some time, he told me that his friend would be meeting him over at his place and he is alr there. so we left the concert after about 2-3songs sang. but its true that the songs sang were boring for us. we went to the bus stop and waited for bus. then he suggested taking train which he will never because he always wanna spend more time tgt. he claimed that because the weather is humid and train will be faster and train might have seats. the thing is bus got higher chances to get seats because train is gonna be damn squeezy and going home by bus takes abt 35mins and train-then-bus is gonna take 45mins. i got no idea why he suggested this but to conclude that he wanna meet his friend sooner. which girl will be happy when your bf is rushing to leave you for his friends? however after he explained while shouting, i understood and wasnt angry anymore. but he still kept repeating saying that i'm very petty and said out all the past where i'm petty and always saying break easily. i didn't shout out the abusive part is alr being kind enough. i didnt talk back because i dont wanna further embarrass ourselves not knowing that he just kept repeating non stop, even till we got up the bus. alot of people were looking at us and i really felt like a pathetic shit. when we were up the bus, he continued saying non stop and its real loud that ppl can hear me and stuff. keep saying that im petty and alr 19 yrs old still saying break all the time (do you have any idea who made me do this)? alll he wanna do is to embarrass me but he didnt know he is embarrassing himself even more. he even go to the extent to insult my family. he is 20, who is childish here? he whined for real long till i say 'stop repeating alr can', he gave me 2 scratches on my neck. it hurts yes, but my heart definitely hurt more. i dont know if i should forgive him.
Just a day ago, he told me one of our friend, ts, whacked his gf real hard with alot of blood on the face and body. he kicked, punched, slapped and all. he said he is guilty, but the girl deserved it. he said i deserve it too. and he added, with the tone i give when quarreling and the unhappy face i give, i will get punches from him someday. what should i do? he is alr hinting me. i dont know if i can still trust him anymore. because i dont want the past to repeat, i suffered enough in the past.
i had enough. people keep advicing me to leave him but because i know i still love him, i dont have the heart to really ignore him and break up. i kept forgiving while the phrase 'leopard never changes its spot' is reflecting in my mind.
i am real clueless and have no idea what to do. i havent been contacting him since last night, can anyone help?
how u expect them to help when u dun wan to b helped... jz leave him... simple as tat... -
This is really like fcuked up! Many guys have no girlfriends and this guy is taking things for granted... abusing his girlfriend like a slave...geez. Abusing someone weaker than you is cowardice. Girls should be loved and appreciated even if they give you a hard time. When you enter a r/s, be prepared for such pain to occur.
TS, I advise you to leave this unhealthy r/s. It's like a neverending loop. You propose to break, he begs, you go back and the same thing happens. Go find other guys who will not abuse you but will please you sexually and emotionally. A real man is someone who is in control of his own emotions. The last thing any guy should do is physically abuse her unless you are talking about having a rough romp together.
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Deathman, the one and only thing you should do is to LEAVE HIM.
Walk away, and never turn back.
Dont expect him to change, he never will.
Of much threatens and violence, do you think he really loves you?
No, my dear.
You dont deserve a man like him.
Walk away, once and for all.
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Originally posted by deathman:
hello all. i really need comments and advice on my r/s. i'll just summarise my dramatic love life. my bf and i have been tgt for 3 years. after months tgt, he showed his true colours by being abusive to me whenever he got angry or when we quarrel. abusive act like punching and scratching which happens in public too. i gave him alot of chances by forgiving him until a day when i couldnt tolerate, i initiated a break up. he got worried and told me all those stuffs that he'll change and so, i went back to him. it became such a habit that whenever we quarrel, i will always say break because the thinking that he will only be afraid of break up is there. however for the past 6mths, he stopped his abusive act. my cousins and aunt and friends knew about it because its really hard to hide my sadness and thoughts when i know there're there for me and the bruises, scratches are obvious.
yesterday, a love festival, i guess i'm the only pathetic one. everything went well but not the night. we were at esplanade for some chattings and theres a mini concert so we sat and listen. after some time, he told me that his friend would be meeting him over at his place and he is alr there. so we left the concert after about 2-3songs sang. but its true that the songs sang were boring for us. we went to the bus stop and waited for bus. then he suggested taking train which he will never because he always wanna spend more time tgt. he claimed that because the weather is humid and train will be faster and train might have seats. the thing is bus got higher chances to get seats because train is gonna be damn squeezy and going home by bus takes abt 35mins and train-then-bus is gonna take 45mins. i got no idea why he suggested this but to conclude that he wanna meet his friend sooner. which girl will be happy when your bf is rushing to leave you for his friends? however after he explained while shouting, i understood and wasnt angry anymore. but he still kept repeating saying that i'm very petty and said out all the past where i'm petty and always saying break easily. i didn't shout out the abusive part is alr being kind enough. i didnt talk back because i dont wanna further embarrass ourselves not knowing that he just kept repeating non stop, even till we got up the bus. alot of people were looking at us and i really felt like a pathetic shit. when we were up the bus, he continued saying non stop and its real loud that ppl can hear me and stuff. keep saying that im petty and alr 19 yrs old still saying break all the time (do you have any idea who made me do this)? alll he wanna do is to embarrass me but he didnt know he is embarrassing himself even more. he even go to the extent to insult my family. he is 20, who is childish here? he whined for real long till i say 'stop repeating alr can', he gave me 2 scratches on my neck. it hurts yes, but my heart definitely hurt more. i dont know if i should forgive him.
Just a day ago, he told me one of our friend, ts, whacked his gf real hard with alot of blood on the face and body. he kicked, punched, slapped and all. he said he is guilty, but the girl deserved it. he said i deserve it too. and he added, with the tone i give when quarreling and the unhappy face i give, i will get punches from him someday. what should i do? he is alr hinting me. i dont know if i can still trust him anymore. because i dont want the past to repeat, i suffered enough in the past.
i had enough. people keep advicing me to leave him but because i know i still love him, i dont have the heart to really ignore him and break up. i kept forgiving while the phrase 'leopard never changes its spot' is reflecting in my mind.
i am real clueless and have no idea what to do. i havent been contacting him since last night, can anyone help?
People who are violent in love often demands a concrete amount of control over something as erratic as love. If one experienced violence over time, fear will eventually displace the position where love used to be. Love cannot be coerced and the truly problematic ones are the one who end up concluding that they needed more force to curb their love ones from running away, one after another. Such unrecognized personality will naturally formulate the outcome of self defeat for afflicted Mars never win in love (In Greek Mythology, obnoxious Ares is pretty much hated by other Gods over his love for war) and only the notion of willingness could love surrender itself and truly be tied down.
Also, chances are, guys who display aggressiveness and violence in love might brought up in a family where such occurrence are a norm in the household.
Nobody has the prerogative to physically abuse anyone else. If his brand of love means beating, then you probably don't really need it at all.
Cheers
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TS's boyfriend should be the role model for all guys.
this is the kind of real man who attracts girls; it is violent abusive guys like him who is able to make girls cling on to him despite all that he has done.
read the teen magazines, women's magazines.
plenty of stories everyday on how, despite a woman being abused by her man, still keeps returning to him. it is sub-consciousness at work; by being violent, a man is sub-consciously showing a woman that he's a REAL MAN who can protect in times of trouble, not some farking sissy.
it is the nice guy losers like me who don't even have any farking girlfriend to hang out with on valentine's day.
this is the kind of alpha-male, forceful real man, who controls the girl and not the other way round. this is how life should be.
if TS can give me your bf's MSN, i would be very grateful.
i need to make him my mentor so that he can teach a soft bast*rd like me how to behave like a farking real man. from what i see, heard and read, the more forceful you're, the more girls you attract.
i don't wanna be a farking soft pretty boy anymore. all those dating tips about being gentlemanly are the biggest single trash i ever knew in my entire farking life.
i vow that from now on, i'll worship and pray to every guy who behaves like a real man.
like that recent 13-year old father in the US who had sex with a 16 year old girl.
that's the most glorious achievement in his entire life and that act alone already wins most SG guys here. i admire his power and wish i could learn from him too.
it is the cheaters, the jerks, the abusers who gets so muhc pretty chicks clinging to them that they have a very tough time deciding which chick to go out with next minute.