To break or not...
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Well, i guess u really have to think back.... 1 year(365 days) neither long, neither short.... Hmmm... Good times... bad times.... The memories..... Im sure... in a year... lots can happen... So, before u jump the gun, ask yourself.... and ask yourself good... Why is it only now that u decided that u cant communicate well? how bout when u 1st met? how was commnication then?... Only after a year?? U said she had good points... Well, everyone has their good points.. but everyone has their bad points 2.. thats why we are human..... So, take an hour 2 tink about it.... Well, it maybe only 10 sms's a day... But how would u feel if there were no sms's at all??? i really suggest u force her to sit down n have a good down to earth chat... Express to her how u feel... Tell her... How important communication is in a relationship and lastly... ask her... how does she feel toward you Now!! This very moment... Only then u will know where your relationship stands....
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true...memories...gd and bad.before we started,i dun feel our communication got any serious problem,thou i must i admit i belong more to quiet type while she's more chatty.it's actually not now that we feel our communication got problem.we actually talk abt it and we tried to improve the situation.i admit no one is perfect,neither am i.actually,i'm very grateful to this r/s cos i really know myself more after getting into it.
when i got no sms???damm sianz....it's as though i'm not in a r/s.i hate it when ppl ask me where's my gf now and i can't answer that.when i msg her that day,i will know but if she dun msg me i'm dead.you might say i can msg her.i agree but i feel it's not right that i keep asking her how's she's doing and where is she everytime.sometime she just have to take the initiative to tell me all these. 
Originally posted by Johnny Bravo:Well, i guess u really have to think back.... 1 year(365 days) neither long, neither short.... Hmmm... Good times... bad times.... The memories..... Im sure... in a year... lots can happen... So, before u jump the gun, ask yourself.... and ask yourself good... Why is it only now that u decided that u cant communicate well? how bout when u 1st met? how was commnication then?... Only after a year?? U said she had good points... Well, everyone has their good points.. but everyone has their bad points 2.. thats why we are human..... So, take an hour 2 tink about it.... Well, it maybe only 10 sms's a day... But how would u feel if there were no sms's at all??? i really suggest u force her to sit down n have a good down to earth chat... Express to her how u feel... Tell her... How important communication is in a relationship and lastly... ask her... how does she feel toward you Now!! This very moment... Only then u will know where your relationship stands.... -
this will be a BIG test.
try to sit down and talk about it. what is important in a long term relationship is how happy both parties r when they r together.
don't avoid the problem!! Discussion will probably help u with your decision.
1) Ask her if she see any problem in the relationship since there have been frequent arguements/quarrel.
2) discuss what trigger this arguement. If this discussion is gonna start any fight, then u have to 'time out' and stop its process. This will also indicate that PEACE will be difficult to achieve in future.
3) if can really sit down to talk about the prev the cause of the prev fights, then see if any way to resolve. Can either party change for the better? Is it very tough to give way?? Is it possible to re-live good old days when u juz started instead of fighting?
Have u walk in a pair of shoes that is 1 size too small. No matter how nice it looks and how much u spent, it hurt to keep wearing it. U must accpt it that your feet r not going to be smaller and the shoes will still hurt till the day u throw it away. -
Another advice... Be easy on her... Women can be quite vulnerable at times despite her appearance... But don't let her emotions melt you to the extent of having your decisions confused again...?Originally posted by loti:Jumping to conclusions too soon and easily i agree is not gd.As you pt it out correctly,i really dun want mess things up just becos of some misunderstanding but i also dun want to drag things cos it will cause more hurt to me and her.Honest and frank feedback is what i'm seeking now. -
~good luck... Whatever's the outcome, remember this... It's always better to face the reality than to invest your feelings deeper and deeper into an unknown relationship.... Things could be much worse that way....?Originally posted by loti:thks for all the replies and support from u guys and gals.i really appreciate it.i really hope things will turn out fine for us.maybe we are really having a communication problem,esp so for me.sigh... -
Well, i guess i can really understand how u feel... U seem to belong in a diff world from her... But as i've said before... it can be worked out.. U also must remember... she has her own freedom 2.... But on the other hand, u cant take it cos deep down inside your worried that u might just loose her... Only one way out my man... Tok about it... Tell her....Originally posted by loti:true...memories...gd and bad.before we started,i dun feel our communication got any serious problem,thou i must i admit i belong more to quiet type while she's more chatty.it's actually not now that we feel our communication got problem.we actually talk abt it and we tried to improve the situation.i admit no one is perfect,neither am i.actually,i'm very grateful to this r/s cos i really know myself more after getting into it. when i got no sms???damm sianz....it's as though i'm not in a r/s.i hate it when ppl ask me where's my gf now and i can't answer that.when i msg her that day,i will know but if she dun msg me i'm dead.you might say i can msg her.i agree but i feel it's not right that i keep asking her how's she's doing and where is she everytime.sometime she just have to take the initiative to tell me all these. -
i think the both of u shld sit dwn n tok things thru...being in a r/s is not really tt easy 2 handle....whatever things u do,you have 2 think abt the other party's feelings...maybe u r juz tired that yr gf din make any effort 2 save this r/s or 2 continue,bt how do u feelin ur hrt?do u really love her?if yes........tok things thru,maybe things r not tt bad?ask her how she feel abt the r/s and wat does she intend 2 do.......if no,then i think remaining as frens will be much better,becoz smtimes if we can't be partners,we can be better frens or even buddies.....
Sometimes,it's not the amount of time u spend 2gether wif each other,it's the feelings u have,some couples duno whether 2 break wif their partners anot becoz they have been in the r/s for 1 yr,or maybe even 5 yrs.....they could not bear 2 break juz because f the number of yrs 2gether and not becoz they can't communicate....this is very bad because u will be hurt in future,if u think u can't tolerate her this kind of attitude or character,tok 2 her and maybe everything will be fine???
if u think u can't meet up on wkdays,nvm meet on wkends instead.........some ppl quarrel so much juz becoz they meet wif each other almost everyday,so sometimes,meeting 2 much is not gd....smsing can be very tiring,guys juz hate 2 msg....she din wan2 call ur hse maybe she's tired after a day's work?try 2 think in her position....
all the best 2 u............... hope u can get yr tots rite.. -
i know ppl need freedom cos i need that too and i dun want a girl to stick to me too much like a leech.so its balance that we are talking abt.i dun really mind that we can't meet on weekday(best can on Friday cos that's pak toh golden time)
but i guess talking is a must rt???i know that i may not be a gd talker but i'm willing to try for the sake of this r/s.I know a r/s is doom when there's no communication or the communication breaks down.i understd that she can be tired after a day's work but i guess she shld try to make an effort to talk.I'm not too sure is this really too demanding.1 or 2 day is still ok but if we go speechless for 5 days,isn't it weird???I'm only worried whatever i ask her,she will just reply with a "ok".Then i'm stuck.... 
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is it a sign of weakness if u tell ur partner u r scare of losing her???
will it cause her to take this r/s more lightly cos she knows she has a "upper hand"???Originally posted by Johnny Bravo:Well, i guess i can really understand how u feel... U seem to belong in a diff world from her... But as i've said before... it can be worked out.. U also must remember... she has her own freedom 2.... But on the other hand, u cant take it cos deep down inside your worried that u might just loose her... Only one way out my man... Tok about it... Tell her.... -
that's another problem of me.my heart is very soft...Originally posted by Devil1976:Another advice... Be easy on her... Women can be quite vulnerable at times despite her appearance... But don't let her emotions melt you to the extent of having your decisions confused again...?
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have u ever wonder she maybe taking you 4 granted.maybe she noes tt u love her alot,bt she dun wana show it out and take yr love 4 granted?some ppl r lik ett.if situation permits,i tihnk u shld get tough wif her 4 once and for all...then c how is it.if she's angry n dun make any effort,then this kind of gal,is worth nothing.u get wat i mean????
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granted???sigh...how u really define that.That thot did cross my miind.....Originally posted by curad:have u ever wonder she maybe taking you 4 granted.maybe she noes tt u love her alot,bt she dun wana show it out and take yr love 4 granted?some ppl r lik ett.if situation permits,i tihnk u shld get tough wif her 4 once and for all...then c how is it.if she's angry n dun make any effort,then this kind of gal,is worth nothing.u get wat i mean????
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u r 2 gd 2 her,she thinks tt u love her 2 much........so watever or however she treats u,u wun have the tot of leaving her coz u can't bear 2 do tt........she noes tt u love her 2 much 2 ket her go,so no matter how gd u r 2 her,she wun treat u tt gd...have 2 ever shouted 2 her?scolded her?told her off?angry wif her?and show it out????it's because u never so she takes u 4 granted..there's more 2 it lor........or maybe she needs somebody 2 be there 4 her only n u came along,so she chose 2 be wif u coz u r there whenever she needs u,and not tt she love u???
sorry if i've said anything tt hurt u>>>>>>> -
if she really loves u,she will agree 2 tok things thru calmly without any hard feelings and she will change for the better and take the r/s more seriously...
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i din really scold her or tell her off.maybe as what u say,i'm really too soft.i did show my anger but my temper is not really that bad,so it seldom happens.i did think of the things that you mention but i got no real "evidence" to justify my claim.Moroever,i do know its nt gd to "pamper" her till she take me for granted.Dun worry...ur words are ok with me.Hurt is already in my dictionary.... Originally posted by curad:u r 2 gd 2 her,she thinks tt u love her 2 much........so watever or however she treats u,u wun have the tot of leaving her coz u can't bear 2 do tt........she noes tt u love her 2 much 2 ket her go,so no matter how gd u r 2 her,she wun treat u tt gd...have 2 ever shouted 2 her?scolded her?told her off?angry wif her?and show it out????it's because u never so she takes u 4 granted..there's more 2 it lor........or maybe she needs somebody 2 be there 4 her only n u came along,so she chose 2 be wif u coz u r there whenever she needs u,and not tt she love u???
sorry if i've said anything tt hurt u>>>>>>> -
u shld not feel sad becoz of her,some gals r like tt,their aim is 2 make guys sad juz because the guys be u had make them feel sad,so they r out 2 take revenge.........dun be soft or u will be in the lose end..........i'm a gal..so i noe how a gal feels after being played by guys.........Originally posted by loti:i din really scold her or tell her off.maybe as what u say,i'm really too soft.i did show my anger but my temper is not really that bad,so it seldom happens.i did think of the things that you mention but i got no real "evidence" to justify my claim.Moroever,i do know its nt gd to "pamper" her till she take me for granted.Dun worry...ur words are ok with me.Hurt is already in my dictionary.... -
i hope she's not really that bad.personally i dun think she's so too.Originally posted by curad:u shld not feel sad becoz of her,some gals r like tt,their aim is 2 make guys sad juz because the guys be u had make them feel sad,so they r out 2 take revenge.........dun be soft or u will be in the lose end..........i'm a gal..so i noe how a gal feels after being played by guys.........
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i aso hope tt she's not tt bad.all the best 2 u.
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Don't worry... You'll probably learn....Originally posted by loti:that's another problem of me.my heart is very soft...
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loti... i think the best thing to do is to find a condusive place and talk things out with your girl...
Enough has been said and heard.... it's time to think things through and have a good heart-to-heart talk with her. Lay your cards and let all be clear.