Problems of the heart
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hey, i have a problem. i would really appreciate it if people give sensible answers. not stupid answers that just make the person look shallow. Anyway, i think i like this girl.. but somehow, she has this habit of adding random guys on facebook or friendster. She doesn't know these guys at all. I'm at a loss at what to do. Should i try to influence her not to continue this practice, or should i jsut abandon all hope?? Can anyone tell me what to do??
And recently , she's getting angry because i don't reply to her msg fast enough. And when I find the time to just sit down and talk to her, she would purposely take a long time, and talk to someone else instead.
And somehow.... I don't feel comfortable when she talks to her male friends. I admit perhaps i'm jealous. But i have low self-esteem and an inferiority complex. Well, admitting your faults is the first step to solve a problem right?
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you're the problem
there's nothing wrong with randomly adding people on facebook or friendster. you don't have to do anything.
if she's angry that you don't reply to her fast, den call her. you don't need to sit down to talk. over the phone is fine.
you like her but is she your girlfriend? nope, i don't think so. you're in no right to be at loss at what to do.
to me, she's treating you as another friend.
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U just make her feel wanted. Lol, nothing more .. Nothing less. Sad but true.
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lol r u her boyfriend in the first place?
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yes she is.. what am i doing wrong then? I call her and then she says she is busy. And hwen i put down, she starts saying about how long i take to reply again.
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If u can do it.. F care her. This kind of girl dun deserve guys's attention imo.
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I mean, she can be really nice at times. And i do enjoy talking to her. I'm busy with studies, mid years are coming, but i set aside time to talk to her, but whenever i find the time, she's probably talking to some other guy. I mean, she's my first relationship, so i don't really have much of an idea what to do. Is it normal for your gf to keep talking to a lot of other guys? And most of them are people she doesn't actually know, but randomly added on facebook. I'm worried that she gets cheated by some sick dog... lols.
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is it really right ?
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Well, my advice would be concentrate on studies. If she has some feelings for you, she will come to you eventually, no matter whether you ignore her or what.
Anyway, it's always better to concentrate on studies then see what's her reaction like.
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so you're saying that i should just completely stop smsing her first n the morning? that's what i always do, i msg her in the morning before school. Then if she sends me a msg, should i reply? she won't call cause she said that she only has free incoming. :|
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u sound like u really like her a lot.
question:does she deserve it?
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I really do like her. Its the first time i've really been so serious about a girl, cause(this may sound weird) but my mom thinks that its better to study first, 'got brains, then can win girl'. haha....
so what should i do? and some people think im the problem. If you can give me ideas on how to be better, I'll really apprecaite it!
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yo.. try stop replying all those silly stuffs.. but reply all those serious topics...
if she angry.. then ignore her... if nothing happens then treat it as normal..
if u feel wat she do is only for attention attracting, but not purposeful... then just heck care her.. she is not good enough for u.. trust me..
i got a friend that she is always attention seeking, 30% of the time making purposeful things, 70% of the time seeking attention... trust me.. if ur friend is like my friend lidat.. then she is a low grade hypocrite being..
i am saying all these as i see nothing wrong at replying msg too slow.. and if she really need to have a fast reply, she might as well call... dun tell me she dun wanna spend that few cents for that urgent reply...
btw no offense.. and good luck
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well, as i always say, singlehood is the best. what i think is that, you should not be like jealous or what.its just normal that girls know more guys and stuff
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Originally posted by brainerror:
well, as i always say, singlehood is the best. what i think is that, you should not be like jealous or what.its just normal that girls know more guys and stuff
not really
i'm single but sometimes i feel jealous of my ex going off with people who i don't approve of
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that is because you still do care for her.
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Originally posted by brainerror:
that is because you still do care for her.
yeah, it's the sense of protection i still have for her
i dun mind her going but still... i would never be able to forgive them if they hurt her
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then talk to her face to face
let her know all ur concerns
it would feel much better even if it doesnt work out in the end
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Originally posted by Rackers 21:
I really do like her. Its the first time i've really been so serious about a girl, cause(this may sound weird) but my mom thinks that its better to study first, 'got brains, then can win girl'. haha....
so what should i do? and some people think im the problem. If you can give me ideas on how to be better, I'll really apprecaite it!
Maybe you won't like this, but I think your mother is right. Studying is most important at your age.
You mentioned your low self esteem, maybe you should solve that first. And accept yourself as you are. And respect yourself, by saying that, I mean, understand that you are just as important as other people.
Oh well, thats about all I know what to say.
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Thanks guys. I don't know. Well I grew up with a mother whom impressed upon me the need to respect girls and those old fashioned ideals that the perfect girl should be those type of really responsible, sweet, innocent, non-flirty type. In short those type that you wouldn't mind spending the rest of your life with.
Maybe i shouldn't post this here(will i get scolding from an admin?) but do those type of girls that i described above still exist?
And inreference to my problem: I should just stop msging her and pretend that i don't really care?
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I won't say stop msging her but dun spoil her as well. Msg if theres a need and reply if theres a need but don't give in to every single thing she says and ask for. If she has feelings for you, she won't want loss u so easily over a few slow msgs but if she has no feelings for you at all, maybe you should just give up.
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well but how do you really know that a girl likes you?
I remember a few days back, I was done studying and i was bored. She said she was busy, so i went to talk to my childhood friend. So my childhood friend asked me why am i bored so i mentioned that the girl i liked said she was busy. So she went to use her phone to msg the girl i like, and she actually replied very quickly and made no mention about being busy. It was bout 30-40 mins later when the gal i liked replied my msg. Does this mean anything?
PS: sorry. I don't know much about these stuff.
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Originally posted by Rackers 21:
well but how do you really know that a girl likes you?
I remember a few days back, I was done studying and i was bored. She said she was busy, so i went to talk to my childhood friend. So my childhood friend asked me why am i bored so i mentioned that the girl i liked said she was busy. So she went to use her phone to msg the girl i like, and she actually replied very quickly and made no mention about being busy. It was bout 30-40 mins later when the gal i liked replied my msg. Does this mean anything?
PS: sorry. I don't know much about these stuff.
How old are u? Sounds young.
There is no real proper test etc but it does seem the girl is taking u for granted. Don't always give in to her and 'test' how she reacts, if she doesn't care at all then it does seem she doesn't really care about you. Don't let her play you anyway she wants.
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are u one of the people she random add 1?
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Originally posted by Daisuke-kun:
you're the problem
there's nothing wrong with randomly adding people on facebook or friendster. you don't have to do anything.
if she's angry that you don't reply to her fast, den call her. you don't need to sit down to talk. over the phone is fine.
you like her but is she your girlfriend? nope, i don't think so. you're in no right to be at loss at what to do.
to me, she's treating you as another friend.
i like the 1st sentence of your reply
