depressed and demoralised
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Originally posted by 86jl:
dun stress dun stress... if no time to reply me, nvm ba
thx.. still learnin to accept that i onli left with 2 limbs and fully paralysed.. doc say my hands are a prob nw.. every wk, i will get to go out 3 times for speech therapy, counselling and doc appt.. but i rather not go out cos i cant stand the looks and stares frm other ppl..
my nurse confirmed le.. comin on next mon to start work.. hope is great
the speech therapist will get me to talk with her and she will try to correct my tone and pronunciation and i will keep sayin the word until i get it correct.. but cos of my ventilator to my neck, i always haf prob in speakin prob and some words veri hard to say.. gettin my sis to type for me takes alot of time too cos she must try to get wat i am sayin b4 she can type out the words
lol, don't worry lah, i reply every 2 - 3 days, just right for me.
as for looks and stares from other people, it's natural lah.
take it as a part of life, because if people don't look or stare, then they're not humans.
Maybe ghosts?!
even for me, when i see a beggar in office area, i will look.
when i see ang-mohs giving out flyers for some kung-fu club, i also look and stare at them.
when i see chio girls, i also stare (a lot, in fact).
when i see the color of the sky during sunset is very different from usual, i also stare a lot.
some people like me, when i see physically disabled folks, my brain just ignore the physically disabled part and treat him like normal, because i know how it feels to be seen differently (btw, in the past when i was a kid, i had operations on my right ear and had to go to school with a huge boxy bandage on the ear and imagine how the other kids saw me).
however, if people stare AND ALSO make nasty remarks, then obviously that's un-acceptable, but very few humans are like that.
if there are, it just shows they're animals with bad upbringing. And I believe any one of your friends, your family members or gfs or even the folks here will stand up for you in such cases and make that animal eat back his own words. Period. End of matter.
you gotta get used to people looking at you. Once you accept that, you'll feel a lot more free and liberated, and a lot less fearful.
Maybe you can try this in future: if they look at you, look back at them and make eye contact with them. Smile a bit in a friendly manner at them. Look at them and do not break eye contact until they're the 1st one to look away. This can greatly help you to overcome the uncomfortable aspect of people staring at you.
so, nurse coming tomorrow (31 Aug)? Good for you! do tell us how she is like.
as for the speech therapy, i believe it can be improved with time, although the process will be slow and require lots of patience, and cannot be rushed (maybe u can practice at home too).
i used to go to speech therapy lessons during my toddler years due to cleft palate (hole in the throat) and couldn't pronouce words properly. It took like 1 - 2 years to overcome it, so i'm sure u can too. If you give up or don't have faith in it, then you won't have the heart to accept the lessons, and if you don't accept the lessons, u can never improve your speech. Cheer up, dude.
and btw, sorry to trouble your sis. i know my posts are long but u can take 5 days to read them and then your sis can take another 1 week to type replies bit by bit.
Nobody is rushing. Pace of life is fast in Singapore but we can choose to slow it down if it makes us happy.
see ye!
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ya i will have to get used to the stares and looks frm ppl but i slowly coping with it le... smtimes i dun bother about them oso..tml got doc appt and speech therapy again.. must go hosp.. it is becomin my 2nd home lor
yup tml the nurse is comin to start her 1st day of job le.. hope everything goes ok..
for speech therapy, got to take my time ba.. my therapist says just take my time and slowly tok altho i still not making any progress.
hmm seems like onli u are chattin with me here.. the rest like go missing le :(
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sw5qgVp0jng
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wow nice trailer.. seems like a good show
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have lor, still got me to chat with u
last time i read in mag u, theres a local lady also in the similar situation like you, she is now a accomplished painter, and paint with her mouth. She is a brave , confident and strong lady who rise to the occasion and beat her adversities. So Jeremy, you can do it.
Give yourself some time to get well slowly :)
You see you have yr gf and nurse to take care of you and family members who also care for you.
With support and determination, i believe you will slowly speak clearer, it takes time for speech rehabilitation. So keep on going and also learn to relax and rest well Jeremy. :)
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have lor, still got me to chat with u
last time i read in mag u, theres a local lady also in the similar situation like you, she is now a accomplished painter, and paint with her mouth. She is a brave , confident and strong lady who rise to the occasion and beat her adversities. So Jeremy, you can do it.
Give yourself some time to get well slowly :)
You see you have yr gf and nurse to take care of you and family members who also care for you.
With support and determination, i believe you will slowly speak clearer, it takes time for speech rehabilitation. So keep on going and also learn to relax and rest well Jeremy. :)
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hi bigthumbfoot.. morning..
yup doc told me i am veri lucky to be able to pull through and be alive altho i cant move anyting frm neck down permanently.. yep i also very happy i still got my family members, relatives, gf, friends and nw nurse to be around and care for me altho i feel like a burden to them..
i juz came back frm my hosp appt and therapy. nurse also report to work le..
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Originally posted by 86jl:
ya i will have to get used to the stares and looks frm ppl but i slowly coping with it le... smtimes i dun bother about them oso..tml got doc appt and speech therapy again.. must go hosp.. it is becomin my 2nd home lor
yup tml the nurse is comin to start her 1st day of job le.. hope everything goes ok..
for speech therapy, got to take my time ba.. my therapist says just take my time and slowly tok altho i still not making any progress.
hmm seems like onli u are chattin with me here.. the rest like go missing le :(
go hospital, u can see people of all sort of conditions and stuff.....helps to widen your view of the world.
i realized that everytime i go hospital, i learn something new in life.so, your nurse come already? how she's like? foreigner or local? chiling lin look-alike?
speech therapy, relax lah! for all u know, you already making progress but u may not know it. even if the therapist says you didn't make progress, so be it. Just try your best, and if after many years still cannot, what does it mean? It simply means that the therapist is not up to standard and you should find a better one. Not your fault.
as for burden, aiyah, you think so much wor.......that's the REAL purpose of family and friends. If "friends" are those people who play with you on Facebook and go makan with you, but suddenly go missing when you're in need, then obviously those are not friends. In fact, real friends won't feel bothered or irritated when taking of another friend, not to mention burden.
some people like ForbiddenSinner and dkcx very busy wor, so cannot blame them.
their work and studies already tying them down to the floor and they can't even breathe.
btw, bigthumbfoot and i are considering of visiting you around Nov - Dec.
no prob?
these few months i can't make it due to being very busy. In Nov and Dec, got annual leave can clear!take care, bro! talk to u in a few days time!
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Originally posted by Nikar7:
go hospital, u can see people of all sort of conditions and stuff.....helps to widen your view of the world.
i
realized that everytime i go hospital, i learn something new in
life.so, your nurse come already? how she's like? foreigner or local? chiling lin look-alike?
speech therapy, relax lah! for all u know, you already making progress but u may not know it. even if the therapist says you didn't make progress, so be it. Just try your best, and if after many years still cannot, what does it mean? It simply means that the therapist is not up to standard and you should find a better one. Not your fault.
as for burden, aiyah, you think so much wor.......that's the REAL purpose of family and friends. If "friends" are those people who play with you on Facebook and go makan with you, but suddenly go missing when you're in need, then obviously those are not friends. In fact, real friends won't feel bothered or irritated when taking of another friend, not to mention burden.
some people like ForbiddenSinner and dkcx very busy wor, so cannot blame them.
their work and studies already tying them down to the floor and they can't even breathe.
btw, bigthumbfoot and i are considering of visiting you around Nov - Dec.
no prob?
these few months i can't make it due to
being very busy. In Nov and Dec, got annual leave can clear!take care, bro! talk to u in a few days time!
Haha, I still check the forums but busy i won't deny.
Tuitions on Tues, Fri and Sat, volunteer work on Weds and Sats...
I only have Mon, Thurs and Sun to rest and do my academic work...
Haven't been posting much since i dunno what to post and these days i'm in a better mood to argue with people to destress :p which accounts for some of recent non SAF forum posts :p
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Originally posted by Nikar7:
go hospital, u can see people of all sort of conditions and stuff.....helps to widen your view of the world.
i realized that everytime i go hospital, i learn something new in life.so, your nurse come already? how she's like? foreigner or local? chiling lin look-alike?
speech therapy, relax lah! for all u know, you already making progress but u may not know it. even if the therapist says you didn't make progress, so be it. Just try your best, and if after many years still cannot, what does it mean? It simply means that the therapist is not up to standard and you should find a better one. Not your fault.
as for burden, aiyah, you think so much wor.......that's the REAL purpose of family and friends. If "friends" are those people who play with you on Facebook and go makan with you, but suddenly go missing when you're in need, then obviously those are not friends. In fact, real friends won't feel bothered or irritated when taking of another friend, not to mention burden.
some people like ForbiddenSinner and dkcx very busy wor, so cannot blame them.
their work and studies already tying them down to the floor and they can't even breathe.
btw, bigthumbfoot and i are considering of visiting you around Nov - Dec.
no prob?
these few months i can't make it due to being very busy. In Nov and Dec, got annual leave can clear!take care, bro! talk to u in a few days time!
ya goin hosp can see alot of tings and learn quite a few tings.. most of the nurses and docs in hosp oso noes me cos of my age in this condition.. they will always greet me and cheer me up whenever they see me... actually smtimes i love goin to hosp..
the nurse is a local in her late 30s.. married le and still quite pretty.. quite an experienced nurse.. knows what she needs to do for my case.. takin gd care of me.. she also helpin me type this reply cos my sis not around..
yup speech therapy will need time i guess... ya i noe everyone is bz around here and my family too.. i will be the onli 1 tt is not bz and veri peaceful 24/7.
nov or dec shldnt be a prob unless smth happen to me again... i oso hope by then i can sit up abit and talk abit more properly..
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Originally posted by dkcx:
Haha, I still check the forums but busy i won't deny.
Tuitions on Tues, Fri and Sat, volunteer work on Weds and Sats...
I only have Mon, Thurs and Sun to rest and do my academic work...
Haven't been posting much since i dunno what to post and these days i'm in a better mood to argue with people to destress :p which accounts for some of recent non SAF forum posts :p
hihi... wow really a bz schedule wor.. wat kind of volunteer work u do? u still studyin? -
Originally posted by 86jl:
hihi... wow really a bz schedule wor.. wat kind of volunteer work u do? u still studyin?Yeah still studying. My 3rd yr in NTU liao...
Every wed i go Singapore Boys Hostel give tuition to the juvenille deliquents from 7.30-9+pm
Every sat i go to Yishun student service center to organise events, workshops or bring the kids out for excursions etc.I'm also helping Young ChangeMaker Conference 2009 (YCMC 2009) as a mentor to help the groups with the project proposals but thats adhoc depending on when and whether the groups approach me for help so i don't include it into my weekly 'schedule'
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oh ntu 3rd yr... tt means u are the same age as me wor... i oso study in ntu just before my accident. :( so do u stay hall? tt means u got join wsc?
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Originally posted by 86jl:
oh ntu 3rd yr... tt means u are the same age as me wor... i oso study in ntu just before my accident. :( so do u stay hall? tt means u got join wsc?
I 1 yr older than u cos i was from poly. Yeah i'm in WSC RSP Youth and RSP FOC.
Stayed hall in yr 1 hall 15, yr 2 hall 9, now waiting list AGAIN...
U last time leh?
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oic... gee... wat course u in? last time i was in hall 2... and then accident happen, no more sch and hall for me
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Originally posted by 86jl:
oic... gee... wat course u in? last time i was in hall 2... and then accident happen, no more sch and hall for me
Chemistry and Biological Chemistry. U?
I use to like going hall 2 for meals. The western, fish soup etc not bad.
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business course... yup the western and fish soup not bad.. i miss the food there but nw i cant eat them anymore.. by the way wat is ur name? i noe of friends in cbc
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Originally posted by 86jl:
business course... yup the western and fish soup not bad.. i miss the food there but nw i cant eat them anymore.. by the way wat is ur name? i noe of friends in cbc
Who u know in CBC? 3rd yr?
Whats past is past, don't dwell over it. You may not be able to taste food etc but your brain is still working and with that, there are still a number of things you can still do :)
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true...i still lookin at wat i can do w/o use of any part of my body below the neck
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Originally posted by 86jl:
true...i still lookin at wat i can do w/o use of any part of my body below the neck
Your brain can still think so you can still use your brain for creativity or even continue the quest for knowledge. For all you know, you might be able to do something with all the knowledge you have gathered to help others and not let physical limitations prevent you from moving forward
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the onli ting i can do nw is go for speech therapy, get my body stronger so i can at least talk beta and sit up abit
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Originally posted by 86jl:
the onli ting i can do nw is go for speech therapy, get my body stronger so i can at least talk beta and sit up abit
That is what you need to do but speech therapy is not 24/7 and rather than ever let yourself have time to think or feel bad/sorry for yourself, try and see whether you can spent your time more meaningfully doing something :)
Being a psy minor student, i believe in the power of the mind and its ability to sometimes even overcome physical limits so don't let your mind be constraint by your physical limits but get your mind to overcome them instead.
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Sorry for not replying the mails you guys here send to me till today cause I was busy with my studies and just read them today only.
86jl, when will you be free for us to visit you?
Please give me a time and date ( along with exact meeting point ) via private mail and I will organise a outing for the others to look for you.
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hihi forbiddensinner, u studyin still at where?
i am free anytime actually but i tink ard nov or dec when my body gets stronger abit ba since nikar suggestin tt timing oso.. the place will be my house tho, hope u all dun mind
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Originally posted by 86jl:
hihi forbiddensinner, u studyin still at where?
i am free anytime actually but i tink ard nov or dec when my body gets stronger abit ba since nikar suggestin tt timing oso.. the place will be my house tho, hope u all dun mind
Hes 1st yr in NIE our 'neighbour'.
I would think he meants your address since we do not know it at the moment.
BTW, as mentioned earlier, i'll only be free on sundays and only in Dec cos exams are in Nov. However you all can go without me if most of you prefer a sat etc.