i'm gettin married but...
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Originally posted by gigabyte14:
call off wedding
dun do anything
that u will regret in the future
Yes, i agree with you!! :D
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What i see is two beggars lacking in love and the exploitations(needs,expectations) has peaked - now, the predicament that she is faced with now - is the same - fall in love and enjoy the feeling, which is a passing phase, poetic mood lar - but the commitment to a boyfriend has her in a bind, now she is obliged to love, obliged to fulfil out of duty: she is crying out to be let free - the fact that she has to post here and solicit opinions and advice and ... speaks volumes of the so-called relationship - especially the lack of quality which she is oblivious to. If it was present - she would be able to relate and pour her soul out to him.
One can call of the wedding - it makes no difference - one can go into another relationship(s) - love and freedom cannot be circumcribed - when it is - one feels trapped - it is bondage. The crux of problems in all relationships and marriges - is goin into it to find, to get ... instead of going into it to share, to appreciate, to allow space and let one another evolve. is it happening?
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I pity your husband-to-be. Lest he's doing the same thing, then I have nothing to say.
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I emphatize with her - cos she has to come here and spout all that aches in her - husband to be ? where is he lar when he could save her all this ......
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then what's the point of saying Yes/I do?
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Do understand this - human being evolve - things don't - it does mean that one who is married or committed to another in another form - cannot emote, cannot feel this way or that way. What is important is the ability to relate to the spouse or the other - understand,appreciate, be grateful and transcend the differences allow one another to be. Behind the roles and the personalities - there is heart that throbs of ...
Its ok lar - if one is holding on a dead flower, a plastic flower.
A labelled product(thing) is a finished thing - one cannot improve on it.
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I dont know how to comment u. i pity yr future hubby.Call off the wedding better.
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Menage trois :D I jest i jest. It just seems to me you are having a bout of commitment issues, no? I think love, the best advice i can give you, is not to take advice from a forum about your marital future. I leave you with a little quote I read somewhere that day: At times of indecision look silently inside yourselfe. You already know the choice.
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Yes look inside lar - but don't overlook this - the small voice that whispers (aka heart, soul - whatever) , unfortunately - hijacked by parental , societal, the priest, the politician - in other words, CONDITIONING - be cognizant of the 4 lar - otherwise, its a crowd - hence the inner conflict!
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Originally posted by blowfish:
I dont know how to comment u. i pity yr future hubby.Call off the wedding better.
precisely. really dunno what to say about her!
Sigh! Where are faithfulness and love ? -
sit down think about it. who you love. what you did.
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TS, marriage is not a game.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRe4Dk327wg&feature=related
Must remember why you love someone... See if you can paint your heart.
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kudos to herzog. You are a great example of ci qing han!
Man like you hard to come by, really!
Cheers
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Originally posted by Fantagf:
kudos to herzog. You are a great example of ci qing han!
Man like you hard to come by, really!
Cheers
Thank you thank you... -
Originally posted by Herzog_Zwei:
Thank you thank you...
You are welcome, Mr Herzog_Zwei. So difficult to let go of fond memory! Sigh!
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yeah marriage is one for a lifetime.to love and understand your partner.
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Originally posted by brainerror:
yeah marriage is one for a lifetime.to love and understand your partner.
marriage also means a lifetime of commitment to your partner. -
yeah lor. so sit down talk to your partner about your feeling. be clear and sure to make the correct choice.
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Originally posted by Luvslegna:
i seem to have fallen for this guy...
what should i do?
You have your relationship (potentially a marriage) to consider, yet your heart has conjured another space to fill in another person into the picture.This dark secret hidden in your psyche - you must decide if it's a push or pull factor that is causing your plight.
Often, people fail to see that their relationship has already been doomed long ago, resulted from malicious causes that have inflicted irrevocable damage. Just that the decision to leave their relationship wasn't effected, until the advert of a catalysis to change (in your situation, it might be the person you have fallen for).
Our monogamy society is such that a heart cannot house love for two separate individuals, just like 'a mountain cannot be home to two tigers'.
You got to decide what you need and stick with it.
Remaining in the best of both worlds (or status quo) will only promise you greater misery, hardship and karmic repercussion.
Cheers
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eh yandao...pm ur email..add u fb
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nvm lah... i got 3 married lover b4... and countless of lover that got bf.. so.. just do what u wan lor.. just dun regret lor.. so choose the correct guy now lor.. dun wait like my married lover like that...wan mi cannot but forgot mi she they cannot....troublesome....
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Originally posted by I-like-flings(m):
nvm lah... i got 3 married lover b4... and countless of lover that got bf.. so.. just do what u wan lor.. just dun regret lor.. so choose the correct guy now lor.. dun wait like my married lover like that...wan mi cannot but forgot mi she they cannot....troublesome....
umm , are u only attracted to married women? -
hw old r u ?
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The parable below exemplifies the predicament of daily human existence - one is awake or sleepwalking thru ....
An astrologer was walking at nite, studying the stars and on the road n by the side there was a hole and without seeing it, fell into it. The sound of his fall n crying awoke an old woman who lived nearby. She helped him out and n he was very pleased.
After thanking her profusely:
he told her that he was a royal astrologer - that his fees was high, that even kings/ queens had to wait for months to see him (this is THE PAST - his knowledge , his image of himself)
n told to her to go and see him the following day n that he would predict her future for no fee. (THE FUTURE)
The old woman laughed n said - You cannot see even two feet ahead (THE PRESENT , THE PRESENCE OF ..) - how you can see my future?
This is the neurosis of today's living, when one cannot appreciate what is in front; when one cannot see what IS - one is trapped in 'should be, could be ... and ought to ... (this is being stuck in the past and wanting to repeat the past in a different form in the future). The present is completely missed or one is oblivious to the present/presence of ..
when it perocolates/premeates into our daily living - in marriages, in relationship(s) - the endless conflict - many end up as cell mates when it all started of on the premise of soul mates!
Love – when it is a friendly fragrance (loving) in which no one is superior, in which no one decides ‘things’, in which both understand and are cognizant of the fact that they are different (individualities encrusted with personalities+roles = social masks), that both their approach towards life is different, that they think differently, and still, with all these differences, they love each other and yet allow space to evolve without encroaching, without possessing .. without the need to behave or even extract promises for tomorrow – both would remain a mystery unto themselves, and when the journey and the goal is one – its an existential experience, subjective and yet never dull or certain. It is akin to a river flowing and yet everfresh! It is nameless, subjective and yet so very alive despite the emotional rollercoasters of the peaks and the valleys of one's journey.
Lastly, its not the lack of love but the lack of FRIENDLINESS that spoils .....