y do ladies need to be so extreme aft they reject guys?
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Hi,
i've jus been rejected recently.
i find tht the other party really isn't handling this well.
she'll say things like "we can still be frens", "no hard feelings" but her actions r totally different.
I initate a chat on facebook, she immed log off. i was blunt and stupid enough to sms her to ask y she needs to be so extreme and she replied it wasn't her and the insensitive me actually gave her a sacrastic reply
i apologize for it and she says it's ok and even sounds like her usual self, wishing me gd nite. i tld her tht i'll keep my promise to give each other time/space to cool down.
ytd nite, i login msn, purposely appearing offline and i saw her online. with no intend to chat with her, i re-login again appearing available and i saw her immed disappearing.
wat's wrg? must gals be so extreme? i already promise to lay off liao and my actions do tell these few days, no sms, no msn, no emails etc... nothing at all.
i really wonder what's on their mind aft tht reject someone. pple tell me the gals also dnt feel gd to break someone's heart but i dnt get it cause it's the guy who's feeling sh!tty mah.
wat can i do now? i thot laying off wld b gd enough but doesn't seem the case :(
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psps wrong post
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Next time , u want to have a r/s by risking a friendship. Think twice before u confess.
Or u must be confident of succeed then u confess. If not, pls don't. Or else don't complain abt losing a friendship.
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no pt crying over split milk.
time to move on
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cut her out completely from ur social circle lor...
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wow, these r really hard advise. something i wldn't even do to a normal fren. perhaps i'm still living in a fairy tale tht it's possible to iron things out eventually and for frens not to have any ill-feelings abt each other.
isn't it strange tht a frenship can turn so sour overnite? jus b4 tht day, everyday was so nice, things jus change immed aft tht.
and it's not as if she doesn't know i got a liking for her, my actions were so obvious, only short of not saying it directly with words.
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any ladies here wld like to shed some light?
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i guess u should just move on..maybe she needs time to accept u as a fren once more. Don't worry coz this is part of life...
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Originally posted by redname:
wow, these r really hard advise. something i wldn't even do to a normal fren. perhaps i'm still living in a fairy tale tht it's possible to iron things out eventually and for frens not to have any ill-feelings abt each other.
isn't it strange tht a frenship can turn so sour overnite? jus b4 tht day, everyday was so nice, things jus change immed aft tht.
and it's not as if she doesn't know i got a liking for her, my actions were so obvious, only short of not saying it directly with words.
if i were u, i would have moved on w my life
maybe she has her reasons?
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There's no way things going to be the same. She'll start to distance from u, which is normal... either: 1) Think u're a loser/don't deserve her/not interested at u or 2)don't want to make u wasting ur time n too much effort at her which is useless to her.. she is treating u just as a friend, not a potential bf.. full stop. So.. I think it's time for u to forget it and make new friends.. before things getting worse n she's gettin more uncomfortable...
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Originally posted by trajet:
There's no way things going to be the same. She'll start to distance from u, which is normal... either: 1) Think u're a loser/don't deserve her/not interested at u or 2)don't want to make u wasting ur time n too much effort at her which is useless to her.. she is treating u just as a friend, not a potential bf.. full stop. So.. I think it's time for u to forget it and make new friends.. before things getting worse n she's gettin more uncomfortable...
the ans is num 2 cause tht's wat she said "dnt need to be so nice to a normal fren like me" -
isn't there a chance ever to turn things for the better?
haha, perhaps this is my wishful thinking bah.
it definitely won't happen now or the near future. perhaps someday, somewhere, i'll see her on the streets again :)
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I think my brains are fried.
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Originally posted by viciouskitty74:
How many places you post this!
no wonder got deleted.well, not everyone visit the same forums mah :)
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So you read my answer liao lah.
She is avoiding you, because it seems that you are being too clingy on her. Even after her rejection.
Nobody really likes to talk talk talk about things that does not interest them. If you tried initiating a conversation with her, and she felt that she is ready to want to talk to you or discuss the topic.
There is nothing there to suggest she will want to always be available for you to talk to.
And no point about it liao lah.
Get on with life, have fun and few years down the road, she will see you successful, interesting and dunno what else fantastic, while she gets older, lonelier and whatever that comes with age which women always have to battle with when they get older.
Or who knows.......donkey years down the road, both of you can sit down and lim kopi and laugh at how youngsters are going thru what you went thru.
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Originally posted by viciouskitty74:
So you read my answer liao lah.
She is avoiding you, because it seems that you are being too clingy on her. Even after her rejection.
Nobody really likes to talk talk talk about things that does not interest them. If you tried initiating a conversation with her, and she felt that she is ready to want to talk to you or discuss the topic.
There is nothing there to suggest she will want to always be available for you to talk to.
And no point about it liao lah.
Get on with life, have fun and few years down the road, she will see you successful, interesting and dunno what else fantastic, while she gets older, lonelier and whatever that comes with age which women always have to battle with when they get older.
Or who knows.......donkey years down the road, both of you can sit down and lim kopi and laugh at how youngsters are going thru what you went thru.
no i haven't read ur reply, the thread got deleted. is it the same as wat you wrote in here?
trying hard to get back with life :)
anyway, how u've been? i'm the same redname from SBF :)
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Babe, I am fine and not fine.
How's your hair growing out from the charity event?
And yes, I made a guess that you are with SBF too.
And regards to my reply, I think it went along the line of:
"That isnt extreme.
She is avoiding you, because it looks like you are not cooling down!"
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Originally posted by viciouskitty74:
Babe, I am fine and not fine.
How's your hair growing out from the charity event?
And yes, I made a guess that you are with SBF too.
And regards to my reply, I think it went along the line of:
"That isnt extreme.
She is avoiding you, because it looks like you are not cooling down!"
wow, wat a confusing reply :Di'm keeping this hair cut, much easier to manage.
ok, i get wat u mean, perhaps i shld really try hard to keep my promise to her. tht reminds me, i put something sacrastic regarding her response, shall change tht
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At least you are not rejected and hit in the groin by a high heel show and videoed
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Originally posted by Ponders:
At least you are not rejected and hit in the groin by a high heel show and videoed
tht will give new meaning to the term "bang balls"well, at least tht guy gotta screw ard to get tht treatment. for me i'm still relaying on my hands :D
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kill the slut
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i think not only girls behave that way, guys behave that way too. so guys and girls are the same in some sort of way in terms of how they handle the matter.
i guess just leave her alone for the time being then.
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The rejection that u feel now is cos it is not self-love but 'her-love'. In other words, she is (was) the object of your love - now that she has more or less rejected u - where is your love pointing to? Hence the anxiety, the anguish ....
Self-fulfil love, self-fulfil responsibility, self-fulfil esteem and u may never have to deal with or find yourself in a predicament that you are in now. To apportion blame on her for what u feel is being unfair to her. She is merely an excuse, it could be another gal or situation - after all that is said and done, its what u are on the 'inside' that counts. Its surfaced now.
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some girls are strange. When u are treating them nice because u are being a gentleman, they got sensitive and thinks u like them n starts to avoid u.
If u treat them bad, they will think why u not acting like a gentleman...
treating a person nice does not neccessary mean u interested in them. she needs to grow up.
its difficult to remain friends with a girl unless shes attached.