I dont love my wife already... what should i do??

holymannn

25 Mar 03, 08:03

I just married 2 years and having a kid now, but i dont love my wife anymore. what can i do? i dont even want make love with her... please help Crying or Very sad

sgboy2004

25 Mar 03, 08:19

omg... go find a marriage counsellor...

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Baby sgboy2004

jeramy

25 Mar 03, 08:25

go kill yourself man

sgboy2004

25 Mar 03, 08:26

mi can help...or rather XLN, mi first wife, can help...

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i am a gentleman

De|usi0n

25 Mar 03, 08:32

men are always like that....think back on the times when u still loves her, before u were married, and think Y you love her in the first place..get that feeling back.

sgboy2004

25 Mar 03, 08:33

once it is gone...it is gone... Crying or Very sad

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I'm the almighty devil...see evil...hear evil...do evil

[ X ] & [ L ]

25 Mar 03, 08:45

Hm... Well afterall its a two yr marriage with a kid. Why not bring her to a vacation go rekindle some flame...

If u do value and cherished e relationship, you should know what to do... Mr. Green

sugardaddy

25 Mar 03, 09:11

well go and knock your head against the wall and die there,,,no one will pity you pal....

loneryu00

25 Mar 03, 09:12

When U 2 wanted to get married dat time... U ever tot of wat wld happen after dat? Maybe U 2 got married due to passion of love... But U got add in commitment? I tink U can try asking old couples how they stick together for so long... I tink it better for U...

kohanson

25 Mar 03, 09:14

How can you said that you don't love your wife already after 2 years of marriage? What's all the commitment about when you made it the moment you marry your wife. What makes you don't like her? You should find out the problem first and try to solve it..

sgboy2004

25 Mar 03, 09:14

Divorce rate is rising...u just add in to the statistics..

go find a marriage counsellor first...

thinking oneself is useless as u are entrenched in thoughts singularly, which is not conducive for healthy thinking... go see the professional...

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Professor sgboy2004

kohanson

25 Mar 03, 09:19

Make your marriage chaos-proof.

http://www.sgforums.com/?action=thread_display&thread_id=39182

reallieRAW

25 Mar 03, 10:26

With juz a few lines of explanation of your situation to us, we can't possibly help. In your own words, tell us WHY you find that you do not love your wife, bcoz you are not making love to her anymore?

I'm trying to u/stand & find out the possible reasons:
Is making love VERY impt to you? Your wife is under-performing?
Do you love to have a kid? Fear responsibility?
How do you see your wife going thru pregnancy?
Are there misu/standings btwn you 2 so far? Regarding wat?

Try to sit down & think abt all these. You've only Detected that you may not love your wife due to some reasons (need to identify 1st) It's a good sign to have Discovered and not late to improve things if you have the intention.

If making love is the only reason from my u/standing, it is actually a sign that something has affected in the r/ship that you dun wish to carry out this intimacy with your wife. Pregnancy can be a reason but I shant speculate too much....We'll wait for your reply.

Prodigy

25 Mar 03, 16:59

reallieRAW
i dont think sex is the reason lah

like, someone said, go on a vacation with your wife ALONE...leave your kid with grandma for a while...

you really need that

jOhO

25 Mar 03, 17:06

man.. u're really screwed.

actually RAW, i dun believe we need mor details.

such situations aren't new, and we don't really have to fill in the blanks to know how sad the situation is.

holymannn, i would suggest you try. open up ur heart, for she's a good woman, or you would have told us that she wasn't.

loneryu00

25 Mar 03, 17:19

U dun love yr wife? Love yr KID...
IF U 2 divorce, da 1 suffering is da child...
I've been thru dis, so I noe it (dun give sarcastic remarks abt dis, ppl...)
If U cannot love yr wife, channel yr love to yr child... let yr child be a happy kid & grow up to be a happy person. I grew up from a single parent, so I noe da pain & misery...

Da most INNOCENT party is yr child, trust me...

browniebaobao

25 Mar 03, 17:46

What made you marry her in the first place? Remember the vow you took? Try to recall...Think of all her good points..maybe the temptations outside made you feel that she is not attractive anymore..remember she is the one who bore you a lovely kid. Remember the good old days..
What is love? What is marriage? Is it so fragile? Rolling Eyes

zacken99

25 Mar 03, 17:48

responsibily n happiness....its up to u to chose..........

but watever its is...ni yao dui de qi zhi ji de lian xin! Cool

Bianca

25 Mar 03, 18:13

Yeah go get professional help from those marriage counsellors, many s'poreans are often too embarrassed to seek help from outside, but if you value your relationship with her & yes, the kid is innocent, pls do something about this!!

I pray that you wun add on to the rising divorce stats...
May God bless you & your family, I hope everything works out fine.. Wink

Juz~Me

25 Mar 03, 20:25

Y??wat happen?? but sometimes, relationship things can be very unpredictable...dun be too harsh on him lar....

Maybe, u shud really sit down and ask urself wat had actually happen dat makes u think u dun love her...no matter hw much advices we can give, we r still outsiders..u r the only one who noes the reason, be trueful to urself!

Yunhaier

25 Mar 03, 22:14

Tell me the reason what are the events leading before you married her & WHY you married her; then I will analysis and tell you what to do. Rolling Eyes

(I have my own conclusion about this: but I want to hear from you)

reallieRAW

25 Mar 03, 22:21

Wah.....u guyz do have a point lah BUT I dun really wish to assume juz like he did? Or rather, giving up on something like feelings so easily.

This is how I feel

Most of the time, r/ships dun seem to last coz the pple have given up hopes to rekindle the flame that once lit up the very r/ship. Maybe the feelings din really disappear but somehow went into hidding bcoz of hurt or disapptments. Feelings dun disappear overnight, so as to explain for why many have to take a long break to start afresh.

I wont share my story here but all I can say is that I saved my r/ship by making an effort to rekindle the flame btwn us & it's a totally different experience & we've learnt to cherish OUR R/SHIP more Wink

Unity

25 Mar 03, 22:50

Why dun love her anymore?
She changed or u changed?
She become "Huang Lian Po" or grow fat, so you don wan make love to her anymore?
Does she feel the same about you?
Does she initiate sex?
Maybe low sex drive la. If sex drive high then anyhow got hole can oredi.

Honeybunz

26 Mar 03, 05:06

"I love you"
"To love.."
"I don't love her anymore"

Notice that the word love is a verb. It's an action. Not a feeling. Feeling is a noun. Action can be controlled, which means that to love her or to love her again is all within your hands.

Why do you think people always "Love can be cultivated"?

Try to rekindle this lukewarm flame.

BrenBren

26 Mar 03, 11:08

That is serious...But why do yopu marry her in the first place....I think it is just a passing phase...or are you having another gal outside?