"Bigger Is Better"
War of the worlds is a more proper representation when dealing with a sensitive topic such as this. This was no easy task, but I think I have gathered the facts when it comes to the right choice to make, A, B, C, or D. This isn't school, fool, this is important. I'm talking about boobs, as per usual, and with the sheer marvel that comes with breasts, warning precautions must be taken to ward against perils of a hideous kind. In school, I'm sure, you strive to get an A, but when it comes to the Jumblies, it may be best to slack off and wait for your perfect D. And in the governmental waste of time and money known as school, A or D doesn't matter much to me, because A or D isn't me, but boobs are far more important than anything I can learn in school, or life.ever. When you're out in public with your girl, her breast size tells what kind of man you are. This is deathly important.
Gather round. Step right up. Don't be shy. Say it to yourself, "My name is Mr. Horny-Late-Teens-Early-Twenties and my Direction of Erection points to the breasts. Yes, you weasel-faced bitch, I like boobs." Come now, was it that hard to admit? No, not your penis!
After careful examination, and much field-testing, I have determined that my previous conclusion of the Perfect Breast Size could have perhaps been erroneous, and ever since that fateful day of publicly announcing the right size, I've felt a thorn in my side, and a constant throbbing in my pants screaming 'No! You've got it all wrong you gelatinous-melon-loving chauvinist.' Finally, after all those years of ignoring it, I've decided to listen to my penis, and he's saying bigger is better.
There are many advantages when it comes to larger breasts compared to smaller ones, but let me first clear something up. I am, IN NO WAY, talking about fat chicks. If you dare say "Oh, yeah, Buf, I know what you're talking about! Those big fat girls. Wooooo, doggy!" I'll stab you in the eye. No, I'm not talking about the kind of blubbery women than can gobble your beanstalk up like an oreo cookie. I'm talking about the girls who weigh LESS than 135 pounds, yet they have ample cleavage to ogle without the ample belly to roll. I admit, there are few out there, but when you find one, you know you're in for a treat.
And lastly, I am not referring to man-boobs, or any other type of boobs, other than the human female, you sick, sick FUCK.
First, let me inform you that we won't be talking about texture, outer nipple, or inner nipple. This is a discussion about size, and because size changes the shape and bounce, I will have to caress them as well.
Comparison of 36 C to 36 D breasts:
Size - Firstly, I'd like to state that you should stick around the 36, and unless you're a fat man or ugly man, you shouldn't go any larger than a 36. Anything below 32 is just too small, and the girl looks like a freak of nature.with giant tits. Additionally, it's fucking obvious you goddamn moron, the D cup is larger than the C, but you shouldn't get carried away with the simple enormity of the larger breast, you should instead focus onwhat was I saying? Anyway, the D cup is better.
Shape - You're probably wondering how the larger breast is going to fair in this competition considering the larger a glandular funbag is, the more it sags. Ha he ha ha! That's where you're wrong. You have to know how to look at them. If the girl is lying on her back, the larger b-jugs clearly win, because they're like two soft hills of marshmallow pillows. Not to mention, nothing beats a set of naked breasts on your chest. And when the girl is on top, she tends to put her hands on your chest for leverage, which pushes the breasts together, making a great shot for firmness. Don't get me wrong, a bigger boob has no right to defy the laws of perfect boobism, and is not allowed to violate the Ideal Boob Profile Law of y = negative x to the nipple, then function of f = x squared from the integral of the chest origin to the nipple. The bigger boob should simple be on a larger scale, and that's it.
Finally, bounce - Here's the kicker. I admit, I have a problem, and perhaps I'm psychotic, but I love watching boobs bounce and jiggle. Factually, I would give up meals for a week just so long as I could watch those vein-laced sacs of joy leap and fall, like the moon, or the tides of a body of water. Smaller boobs are too firm to get the kind of recoil I like, or they are simply too small. With larger breasts, you can squeeze, and not worry about breaking off her nipple or something equally freak-nasty.
This is my fourth essay on breasts alone, and I would be proud to be the manno, the legend that sets forth in motion the movement that states that if you offer to buy a girl a drink, she is, by law, required to sleep with you.
And remember what Stanley, the Powertool, always says. "Splurt splurt." Roughly translated to "Bigger is better."