Can you give unconditional love?
-
@Rainbow Jigsaw:
Ur posts have enlightened me
however, i can only give to those closest to me
i am a selfish man
milo out
-
Originally posted by Mr Milo:
@Rainbow Jigsaw:
Ur posts have enlightened me
however, i can only give to those closest to me
i am a selfish man
milo out
have more faith in your good self, my friend. :)you'll have a much happier life...
-
Originally posted by Fcukpap:
the framework for unconditional love should be balanced with both genders' interests...not just overemphasizing on women....it would be ironic (esp. for women) to talk about unconditional terms when they expect conditional love in return for so-called "women's security" at the expense of men....
modern love is fed on materialistic terms and conditions....remove them first
both men and women should learn to care genuinely for each other unconditionally, if they wish to have a lasting r/s together. no gender should be given advantage, if true happiness is what both parties want. not enough couples can do that these days, hence the rising divorce rates. whenever there's problems in a r/s or marriage, either or both parties will take the easy way out and scram first. if couples can really be there for each other thru thick and thin, then no obstacles will be too tough to overcome. -
@Rainbow Jigsaw:
U sound like TrueHeart
her postings really do help people in their agony
are u by chance any way related to her?
-
If you are giving unconditional love, why care if you are being taken advantage ? Why borther about terms and conditions. If only couples know how to give and take. Giving too much hurts yourself, taking too much hurts the other party.
-
Originally posted by Rainbow Jigsaw:
Many problems in our daily lives revolves around relationships between couple, family members, friends, etc. Often, we get angry or disappointed when we don't get what we expect from them, be it love, attention, money, help etc.
Have you thought if you're able to give unconditional love to people around you? And are people around you able to also give that? If everyone can do that, many of our life problems will be solved. :) "Love" simply means genuine care and concern for people, and doesn't just refer to romantic love. It could be family love, friendship type of love, love towards pets, etc.
http://www.rainbowjigsaw.com/2010/05/when-only-unconditional-love-remains.html
Rainbow Jigsaw of Life
unconditional love? u can theoretically yes. a person can love unconditionally. maybe an editorial 'u' can love unconditionally. but not most people. specifically most people are excluded from that category.
-
becos sg sluts are not automatic (or in hokkien buay zi dong)...and limitless in their expectations...they become spoiled and make unconditional love like abused love..
-
in other words...they give love a bad name
-
No. I don't think i can. Fact is, when i give, i expect a return. If the person really loves you, automatically you will gain from what you gave. If you are in a situation where you keep giving & the person doesn't even give a damn, it's so one sided & its better to move on.
-
Originally posted by dangerboi:
depends on the situation..it doesn't depend on the person
..."depends on the situation"......
than it is therefore condition.... -
Originally posted by Mr Milo:
@Rainbow Jigsaw:
U sound like TrueHeart
her postings really do help people in their agony
are u by chance any way related to her?
TrueHeart in this SGForum? I dunno her, though part of my name in Facebook is TrueHeart. :)
and I'm male.
-
Actually, in our lives, we reap what we sow, whether we see the connection or not. The connection is often not obvious, and needs deep reflection to see/understand it.
It's true that it's very difficult to give unconditional love in our modern day world, esp. in materialistic S'pore. And that's why many r/s cannot stand the test of time and difficulties. Not enough people can endure obstacles or difficult times with their partners, as they tend to think in terms of what are they getting in return (eg. affections, material stuff, time, marriage, stable home, stable income, etc). Many people lead their lives like running a business, with daily ROI (return on investment) and cost-benefit analysis being carried out. If ROI is low, or worse still negative, better leave this current partner and find another one who can offer high and positive ROI.
If couples can truly love each other unconditionally, no matter how tough life may be, they will stick together and love each other, cos they really want the other party to feel good, instead of only caring for their own well-being.
So, question is: what sort of person do we want to be? If we want to follow the crowd and just be another self-centred lover/bf/gf/spouse, then we need to be realistic and not expect lasting happiness in our lives, because life is not going to be smooth sailing all the time. If you've decided to be an unconditional lover/bf/gf, you'll have a much higher chance of attracting the same kind.
-
Originally posted by TTFU:
If you are giving unconditional love, why care if you are being taken advantage ? Why borther about terms and conditions. If only couples know how to give and take.
Very well said. :)but of course, if the other party is obviously a selfish lover/bf/gf out to take advantage of people, then there's no reason to continue the r/s, unless the ideal situation happens, ie. the other party is able to be positively influenced by you and changes for the better. At the end of the day, we should aim to attract our own kind, so as multiply the effect of happiness and positivity, to spread the positive effect to others to help them.
When 2 genuine people love and care for each other unconditionally, they'll naturally feel and experience happiness in their lives. Then they can have the strength and positivity to influence others to also be unconditional lovers like themselves, and eventually, we'll have a community of more caring people.
Problem is, currently, the reverse happens, which is why we have a society of conditional lovers/bfs/gfs/spouses, and that effect is spreading all the time. But if we choose not to follow the crowd, as we believe in what's right and not what's popular, then we have a chance to find our own happiness. :)
-
unconditional love from only one party will eventually let the other party abuse it without them knowing it..limit..limit..dun be blinded..it's silly
-
I think nowadays not many show love already yet unconditioned one. haha
-
@Rainbow Jigsaw:
i have 1 friend who really gives unconditional love to her bf & her bf just treat her like a toy..........when he need her, he call for her.......when he finish, he fuck off to dunno where
i feel real sad for her, her bf treat her like that yet she still so nice to him, speak up for him, think he has his own reasons for treating her like that
i, as her listener, listen to her woes & shake my head inside...........why this fella treat her like this?
anyway, she has already break up with her bf...........she cannot take the treatment anymore
so, you see, i suppose the one & only superhuman i can see around is her liao
why will a woman give so willingly?...........it totally runs against my own beliefs...........
-
Originally posted by Mr Milo:
@Rainbow Jigsaw:
i have 1 friend who really gives unconditional love to her bf & her bf just treat her like a toy..........when he need her, he call for her.......when he finish, he fuck off to dunno where
i feel real sad for her, her bf treat her like that yet she still so nice to him, speak up for him, think he has his own reasons for treating her like that
i, as her listener, listen to her woes & shake my head inside...........why this fella treat her like this?
anyway, she has already break up with her bf...........she cannot take the treatment anymore
so, you see, i suppose the one & only superhuman i can see around is her liao
why will a woman give so willingly?...........it totally runs against my own beliefs...........
Unlike what you think...there are many women like tt lor...
My frens also like tt....
-
Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
Unlike what you think...there are many women like tt lor...
My frens also like tt....
Is it?
So much so it runs against their own Sanity that they will do so?
this is absurd!
-
Originally posted by Rainbow Jigsaw:
what if you give unconditional love, but the other person bites the hand that feeds her/him ? for this type of people, there is no point continuing on the relationship, and keep giving because you are just gonna drain yourself.
if you give unconditional love only the person is good enough that you see meaning in keeping the relationship, then it is not strictly unconditional, don't you agree ?
Very well said. :)but of course, if the other party is obviously a selfish lover/bf/gf out to take advantage of people, then there's no reason to continue the r/s, unless the ideal situation happens, ie. the other party is able to be positively influenced by you and changes for the better. At the end of the day, we should aim to attract our own kind, so as multiply the effect of happiness and positivity, to spread the positive effect to others to help them.
When 2 genuine people love and care for each other unconditionally, they'll naturally feel and experience happiness in their lives. Then they can have the strength and positivity to influence others to also be unconditional lovers like themselves, and eventually, we'll have a community of more caring people.
Problem is, currently, the reverse happens, which is why we have a society of conditional lovers/bfs/gfs/spouses, and that effect is spreading all the time. But if we choose not to follow the crowd, as we believe in what's right and not what's popular, then we have a chance to find our own happiness. :)
what if you give unconditional love, but the other person bites the hand that feeds her/him ? for this type of people, there is no point continuing on the relationship and keep giving because you are just gonna drain yourself.
if you give unconditional love only if the person is good enough that you see meaning in keeping the relationship, then it is not strictly unconditional.
when you are in a situation when you are being deeply hurt by someone you give unconditional love to and still decide to continue loving, then only i believe one is qualified to stand by your hypothesis. otherwise it's just theory.
-
One would need to distinguish between what is abusive and that of unconditional….its rather hard to prove at times when the person is out to exploit another through vicious covert means ….. esp when one puts in wholeheartedly without a speck of doubt….
It is important to have a basic understanding of human nature….there exists good and evil….
-
Originally posted by Mr Milo:
Is it?
So much so it runs against their own Sanity that they will do so?
this is absurd!
Yea....
got one ish really stupid
lol
-
Originally posted by luvcfood:
what if you give unconditional love, but the other person bites the hand that feeds her/him ? for this type of people, there is no point continuing on the relationship and keep giving because you are just gonna drain yourself.
if you give unconditional love only if the person is good enough that you see meaning in keeping the relationship, then it is not strictly unconditional.
when you are in a situation when you are being deeply hurt by someone you give unconditional love to and still decide to continue loving, then only i believe one is qualified to stand by your hypothesis. otherwise it's just theory.
Romantic love ?
-
I know it's not easy to tell the real nature of a person we care about. Giving unconditional love to a person who deserves love is still being unconditional, but it's not the same as hitting ourselves with a hammer non-stop, if you get what I mean. It's not easy to explain it all here on a forum, as it takes real-life experiences and practice. It's definitely not theory, unless we wish it to be.
Like in my previous posts, it's about Law of Attraction. Like attracts like. When we decide to be unconditional lovers, we will somehow have a much higher chance of attracting similar kind, then we can be happy. There are other key factors that determine one's life journey, but it's not appropriate for me to explain it here, as that will involve people's belief system.
If the other party is obviously a SOB, then just leave and find someone more deserving. It's not because we're not being unconditional so we leave, but because we are helping to reduce negativity in this world. By being miserable with an obviously selfish partner who has no intention to improve doesn't help anyone or the world. That person will eventually need to learn his/her life lessons. But if we can learn from it, and seek other parties who are also giving and seeking unconditional love, then the positivity will grow, spread and help others around you. That's the difference. :)
-
I think not worth it to show unconditioned love.
-
Keep giving = idiot. If the person dont derserve it, then just leave it.