Fools rush in
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Men are always going too heavy too fast too soon. That’s the biggest complaint from women today. In so doing, men come across as desperate and too available, which is a major turn off to women.
So at what pace should men go and who dictates that pace? Ever since Adam and Eve, men have always been the aggressor. Men approach women. Women almost never have to or never want to approach men. Why would they want to put themselves at the risk of rejection when men are already doing it anyway? If she ever wants a guy, she will choose to flirt instead and get you to do the dirty work of approaching. That’s how it is in most societies, whether we like it or not, that is the reality. So by default, women have been given the choice of accepting versus rejecting and also the choice of setting the pace in any pursuit.
Since only the woman herself will know when she is comfortable to shift gears, we have to go very slowly with them. Patience is the key. When you are able to be patient with them, they will find you different from the rest of the other guys who are always going too heavy too fast too soon. Patience will set you apart from the competition. Let the rest of the guys rush in, turn the woman off and get dumped. We will not attempt to shift gears unless given cues to do so. Women will seldom tell men directly to go faster but they definitely show signs or behave in certain manner to hint to us she is ready to take things to the next level. When we receive those hints, she is indirectly approaching us to take things to the next level. The choice is now ours to make and the tables are now turned. If you have yet to realize by now, love is a power play. In order for the relationship to last, men have to come out stronger in the power struggle because women are subconsciously looking for leaders in their men.
So specifically, how should we go about this whole idea of patience and playing it cool in the beginning stages of dating? First and foremost, always wait five to nine days to call after you have got her number and between dates. Most guys predictably call within two days. But you are a cut above the rest. Secondly, you will only give her a call between Sunday to Thursday and ask her out for a date between Sunday to Thursday. In other words, never call her on a Friday or Saturday and never ask her for a date on Friday or Saturday. What’s the big deal with Fridays and Saturdays? These two days are only reserved for that special someone. She has yet to attain that status yet. You are always busy on Fridays and Saturdays, regardless of whether you are busy. Get the drift?
By the 4th to 7th date, she will ask you why you don’t ask her out for Fridays or Saturdays, this is supposed to happen if her interest in you has been increasing since the first date. Her interest should be on the rise if you have not done anything to turn her off since date one. When she asks that question, that is her first indirect approach. Ask her why going out on Friday or Saturday is important. Act dumb and make her reveal her feelings for you. If she refuses to, just continue taking her out on the other days. Only take her out on a Friday or Saturday when she asks you to.
By the 8th to 12th date, she will ask you where the relationship is going. In other words, she is asking you whether you want her to be your girlfriend and make the relationship exclusive. When she asks that question, ask her “Are you asking me to be your boyfriend?” -
Usually, it's the men who propose certain actions and the women dictate the pace the relationship goes.......
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That's why they take their own sweet time at U-turns, and a major jam always develops.
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Originally posted by SgLoveCop@blogspot:
Men are always going too heavy too fast too soon. That’s the biggest complaint from women today. In so doing, men come across as desperate and too available, which is a major turn off to women.
So at what pace should men go and who dictates that pace? Ever since Adam and Eve, men have always been the aggressor. Men approach women. Women almost never have to or never want to approach men. Why would they want to put themselves at the risk of rejection when men are already doing it anyway? If she ever wants a guy, she will choose to flirt instead and get you to do the dirty work of approaching. That’s how it is in most societies, whether we like it or not, that is the reality. So by default, women have been given the choice of accepting versus rejecting and also the choice of setting the pace in any pursuit.
Since only the woman herself will know when she is comfortable to shift gears, we have to go very slowly with them. Patience is the key. When you are able to be patient with them, they will find you different from the rest of the other guys who are always going too heavy too fast too soon. Patience will set you apart from the competition. Let the rest of the guys rush in, turn the woman off and get dumped. We will not attempt to shift gears unless given cues to do so. Women will seldom tell men directly to go faster but they definitely show signs or behave in certain manner to hint to us she is ready to take things to the next level. When we receive those hints, she is indirectly approaching us to take things to the next level. The choice is now ours to make and the tables are now turned. If you have yet to realize by now, love is a power play. In order for the relationship to last, men have to come out stronger in the power struggle because women are subconsciously looking for leaders in their men.
So specifically, how should we go about this whole idea of patience and playing it cool in the beginning stages of dating? First and foremost, always wait five to nine days to call after you have got her number and between dates. Most guys predictably call within two days. But you are a cut above the rest. Secondly, you will only give her a call between Sunday to Thursday and ask her out for a date between Sunday to Thursday. In other words, never call her on a Friday or Saturday and never ask her for a date on Friday or Saturday. What’s the big deal with Fridays and Saturdays? These two days are only reserved for that special someone. She has yet to attain that status yet. You are always busy on Fridays and Saturdays, regardless of whether you are busy. Get the drift?
By the 4th to 7th date, she will ask you why you don’t ask her out for Fridays or Saturdays, this is supposed to happen if her interest in you has been increasing since the first date. Her interest should be on the rise if you have not done anything to turn her off since date one. When she asks that question, that is her first indirect approach. Ask her why going out on Friday or Saturday is important. Act dumb and make her reveal her feelings for you. If she refuses to, just continue taking her out on the other days. Only take her out on a Friday or Saturday when she asks you to.
By the 8th to 12th date, she will ask you where the relationship is going. In other words, she is asking you whether you want her to be your girlfriend and make the relationship exclusive. When she asks that question, ask her “Are you asking me to be your boyfriend?”I don't know where you get this idea about you going too fast or too slow. Not all women are the same. Some like it hot, some like it cold. Some don't want it too fast but there are some who want it faster ! Normally those women who get turn off by men who go too fast are those who are rebounding. You cannot generalise. Fact is you must be able to read what the girl wants, if you are good at it then you are good at going after her. Speed of the chase has nothing to do with it.
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Originally posted by Hugh Hefner:
I don't know where you get this idea about you going too fast or too slow. Not all women are the same. Some like it hot, some like it cold. Some don't want it too fast but there are some who want it faster ! Normally those women who get turn off by men who go too fast are those who are rebounding. You cannot generalise. Fact is you must be able to read what the girl wants, if you are good at it then you are good at going after her. Speed of the chase has nothing to do with it.
It applies majority of the time. If you look like Brad Pitt or Geroge Clooney or have as much money as Donald Trump, they wish you just propose marriage to them on the 1st date.
And most guys are not good at reading what the girl wants. If guys know how to read girls, they would not end up in loveless marriages or divorce or getting dumped.
And you can never go wrong if you are going at their pace. And you are making them come after you, instead of you going after them. Its about POWER actually, speed is just a way to get it, i should say lack of speed.
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walau,wait till the 12th date for what?so fucking slow.waste electricity.my strike rate wth women has always been at 100% .1st date,gal already become my gf,plus sex.if things dun work out,dun matter.already fuck the gal.got wat i want.move on to the next gal.simple.
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Originally posted by YOU'LL GO BANKRUPT ALONE:
walau,wait till the 12th date for what?so fucking slow.waste electricity.my strike rate wth women has always been at 100% .1st date,gal already become my gf,plus sex.if things dun work out,dun matter.already fuck the gal.got wat i want.move on to the next gal.simple.
If your aim is only sex, of course 12 dates is too long. If your aim is a everlasting fulfilling long term relationship, 12 dates is very short a waiting time. Different fish need different bait.
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next, pls.
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Sglovecop,
Let me give you a few pointers.....
A boy girl relationship is not baking a cake.
There is no hard and fast rule to when you should call her or not.
It's all about feelings. If she is not into you.. learn to leave her alone.
If she is into you..she'll be waiting by the phone. You make her wait... you'll get to pay for it later.
Stop dating girls who are out of your league.
Stop playing mind games.
Don't be afraid to face rejections.
Love waits for no one.
Ok ? Good.
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You think this is a maths problem ah?
Sorry. You Phail.
Your biggest mistake was thinking that all females are exactly the same.
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
Sglovecop,
Let me give you a few pointers.....
A boy girl relationship is not baking a cake.
There is no hard and fast rule to when you should call her or not.
It's all about feelings. If she is not into you.. learn to leave her alone.
If she is into you..she'll be waiting by the phone. You make her wait... you'll get to pay for it later.
Stop dating girls who are out of your league.
Stop playing mind games.
Don't be afraid to face rejections.
Love waits for no one.
Ok ? Good.
Thank you for your pointers.
There is no hard and fast rule but there are principles that men need to abide by if they want to win with women.
Of course it's all about feelings. But men only look at their own feelings and mostly fail to read the woman's feelings toward him.
If she's into the man, she will love him more if he makes her wait a bit. If she trys to make him pay for it later, he will drop her.
men should only date girls (whatever league) if they have a plan, otherwise they'll just end up in pain eventually
men don't know how to play games. women are playing all the games.
rejections are part and parcel of dating, don't take it personally. if you don't swing, you can never hit.
if she loves him, she will wait.
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Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
You think this is a maths problem ah?
Sorry. You Phail.
Your biggest mistake was thinking that all females are exactly the same.
Females are not the same, they are just similar. Women are not like men, women are like women. Just like cats are like cats, even though they come in different colors and sizes. Brown cat or white cat, both cats will eat fish.
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Originally posted by SgLoveCop@blogspot:
Females are not the same, they are just similar. Women are not like men, women are like women. Just like cats are like cats, even though they come in different colors and sizes. Brown cat or white cat, both cats will eat fish.
-_-"I'm sure I know better since I'm the gal, not you.
But whatever, you can continue thinking that you're the God of Love for all I care.
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Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
-_-"I'm sure I know better since I'm the gal, not you.
But whatever, you can continue thinking that you're the God of Love for all I care.
women think they know what they want, but they really don't, at least most of them. the trick is to gauge their true intention via their actions not their words.
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Originally posted by SgLoveCop@blogspot:
women think they know what they want, but they really don't, at least most of them. the trick is to gauge their true intention via their actions not their words.
Wow so you know what a woman wants even though she doesn't know it herself.
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Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
Wow so you know what a woman wants even though she doesn't know it herself.
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Theres no standard rule in dating. Not every women are the same. Learn to pick up signs yes, know when is the time to be initiative and time to be not.
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Originally posted by TTFU:
Theres no standard rule in dating. Not every women are the same. Learn to pick up signs yes, know when is the time to be initiative and time to be not.
How to know when to be initiative and when to be not?
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Rubbish
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Originally posted by SgLoveCop@blogspot:
Females are not the same, they are just similar. Women are not like men, women are like women. Just like cats are like cats, even though they come in different colors and sizes. Brown cat or white cat, both cats will eat fish.
You seem to take women as an object.
You focus largely on men only, as not being good at reading women and such.
There is a same obligation on women to read men too. Too many people, men and women have failed to recognise or ignored signs that they are incompatible. And entered into a disasterous relationship or marriage.
Fools, men and women, do rush in.
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Originally posted by SgLoveCop@blogspot:
Thank you for your pointers.
There is no hard and fast rule but there are principles that men need to abide by if they want to win with women.
Of course it's all about feelings. But men only look at their own feelings and mostly fail to read the woman's feelings toward him.
If she's into the man, she will love him more if he makes her wait a bit. If she trys to make him pay for it later, he will drop her.
men should only date girls (whatever league) if they have a plan, otherwise they'll just end up in pain eventually
men don't know how to play games. women are playing all the games.
rejections are part and parcel of dating, don't take it personally. if you don't swing, you can never hit.
if she loves him, she will wait.
-"win" the woman ? Do you think a woman is merely a trophy for you to win ? Fail.
-Men mostly fail to read the women's feeling, or they simply REFUSED to read her feelings? There's such a thing as "communication" dude. Obviously you are severely lacking in the 'communication department" looking at the way you reply female forumers in this thread.
-Wrong again dude.. love erodes with more vengence.
-Date a girl out of your league, and you'd be in a lot more pain..really.
-This I agree.. men do not know how to play games.. they are shit lousy at it.. look at your postings.. they are sucky pointers at playing the relationship game...So.. since guys are so bad at it.. don't bother playing.. girls will forgive you for not playing the game.
-On rejections.. I agree.. but not many can walk the talk.
-If he loves her.. he won't make her wait. Simple as that. She will love to wait.. but only to club you on the head when you falls asleep. For there are love aplenty.. not within only one.
Unless she is truly butt ugly on the inside and out.. then what is there for you to make her wait ?
ok? Good.
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Originally posted by mancha:
You seem to take women as an object.
You focus largely on men only, as not being good at reading women and such.
There is a same obligation on women to read men too. Too many people, men and women have failed to recognise or ignored signs that they are incompatible. And entered into a disasterous relationship or marriage.
Fools, men and women, do rush in.
I never take women as an object. But women is the subject of discussion here.
I do not deny women have the same obligation to read men. But women are much better than men at doing that. My wish is to adivse men, not women.
If the man is trained to read situations and recognise problems early on if any, he will know what he is getting into if he decides to go into marriage with a woman. But majority of men do not know how to.
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
-"win" the woman ? Do you think a woman is merely a trophy for you to win ? Fail.
-Men mostly fail to read the women's feeling, or they simply REFUSED to read her feelings? There's such a thing as "communication" dude. Obviously you are severely lacking in the 'communication department" looking at the way you reply female forumers in this thread.
-Wrong again dude.. love erodes with more vengence.
-Date a girl out of your league, and you'd be in a lot more pain..really.
-This I agree.. men do not know how to play games.. they are shit lousy at it.. look at your postings.. they are sucky pointers at playing the relationship game...So.. since guys are so bad at it.. don't bother playing.. girls will forgive you for not playing the game.
-On rejections.. I agree.. but not many can walk the talk.
-If he loves her.. he won't make her wait. Simple as that. She will love to wait.. but only to club you on the head when you falls asleep. For there are love aplenty.. not within only one.
Unless she is truly butt ugly on the inside and out.. then what is there for you to make her wait ?
ok? Good.
i never said woman is a trophy for man to win. winning in terms of being successful in romantic relationships. from a man's point of view, the other party is the woman which he has to win.
majority of men do not know how to read. of course there are some that know but simply refuse to. its not my wish to please female forummers here with answers they want to hear. i'm not here to seek anyone's approval. you are all entitled to your own opinions. please feel free to shoot my advice down, at the end of the day, its your words against mine. the truth is out there for everyone to find out.
where does that vengeance come from?
a guy will only end up in pain if he does not know how to handle women. whatever league.
guys are lousy at playing games which is why they always come out on the losing end with women. its time to level the playing field.
there is love aplenty but those love aplenty will not be lasting. only those with knowledge of how to handle women can make that love lasting. if he loves her, he should make her wait. if she does not respond well to waiting, she should not be considered for relationship or marriage.
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Originally posted by SgLoveCop@blogspot:
i never said woman is a trophy for man to win. winning in terms of being successful in romantic relationships. from a man's point of view, the other party is the woman which he has to win.
majority of men do not know how to read. of course there are some that know but simply refuse to. its not my wish to please female forummers here with answers they want to hear. i'm not here to seek anyone's approval. you are all entitled to your own opinions. please feel free to shoot my advice down, at the end of the day, its your words against mine. the truth is out there for everyone to find out.
where does that vengeance come from?
a guy will only end up in pain if he does not know how to handle women. whatever league.
guys are lousy at playing games which is why they always come out on the losing end with women. its time to level the playing field.
there is love aplenty but those love aplenty will not be lasting. only those with knowledge of how to handle women can make that love lasting. if he loves her, he should make her wait. if she does not respond well to waiting, she should not be considered for relationship or marriage.
May I ask.. how many relationship have you been through ? And how long each lasts ?
How many failed attempts and how many successful ?
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
May I ask.. how many relationship have you been through ? And how long each lasts ?
How many failed attempts and how many successful ?
i am not speaking from experience so it does not matter what my relationship experiences are.