Workplace abuse/harrassment
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Originally posted by dragg:
what do you think your manager would do to satisfy a part-timer? this is the real world we are talking about. there are injustices everywhere. you have to learn to prioritise. is it so important to 争一�气? tender and move on. you have a long way to go in life. it is important to stand up for yourself but only if it is really necessary. you are a part-timer and those colleagues of yours are just 'passerbys' in your life. once you quit they are out of it.Hmmm true. But sometimes you have to understand that certain abuse is not what I supposed to take in....and for nothing!
I mean I Know that working life isn't easy, I got my fair share of scoldings and put downs...but sometimes if it is outside the norm (which is sooo unprofessional and borderline harrassment), must they act like a total animal? Weirdo. Sure, I maybe anti-social but I am not that stupid to know that other people also have their own attitude problem. I ask you, do you not want to feel good about yourself? or do you want to be a pushover for them?
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Plse dont label yourself as anti social.
Most of the pple are anti social.
Me, I am also anti social.
I dont talk much at work.
Lunch time, never with colleagues.
Outing, seldom mix.
Still I am one piece.
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Originally posted by XiaoBunbun:
Hmmm true. But sometimes you have to understand that certain abuse is not what I supposed to take in....and for nothing!
I mean I Know that working life isn't easy, I got my fair share of scoldings and put downs...but sometimes if it is outside the norm (which is sooo unprofessional and borderline harrassment), must they act like a total animal? Weirdo. Sure, I maybe anti-social but I am not that stupid to know that other people also have their own attitude problem. I ask you, do you not want to feel good about yourself? or do you want to be a pushover for them?
And hence the injustices mah.
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Originally posted by likeyou:
Plse dont label yourself as anti social.
Most of the pple are anti social.
Me, I am also anti social.
I dont talk much at work.
Lunch time, never with colleagues.
Outing, seldom mix.
Still I am one piece.
I used to work in an office environment and I was allowed to be anti-social and they only monitor my work, that's all.The people here are civilised though sometimes I get into conflict with them but most of the time is ok. One of my lady colleague even asks me to sit close to her during a new year gathering dinner.
Different workplace have different workplace dynamics. Unlike here, colleagues are just colleagues. You can honestly say that I got a culture shock here.
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you just start working part time in a freak place and whinny about how miserable life is.
you get screwed because you screwed up something. don't like the leave the job.
china people scold you because you did something wrong and create problem for him.
you come here to unwind yourself only. world is filled with evil / selfish people / moronic / individual / anti-social people
learn to live with it. the world's not created for you only.
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I came to vent of course, isn't this aunt agony? I already wrote from the start of my paragraph, that something is bothering me I can't concentrate....hopefully people would advise me...since I have no friends...who should I turn to????
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since now you left the place and for good just forget it. unless they don;t pay your salary or what. read some of the threads here replies and in other thread of the foeum. some of them can be very funny. learn to laugh at those jokes. sometimes the situation persis and you feel like you are going to stuck forever in hell but no one can predict whats gong to hppen. take it like drigin through a drak tunnel. you just have to keep driving until you reach the exit to light. meanwhile while dringin thru it can get boring so keep yourself occupied with coffee burger music so on
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Maybe you have special abilities. You inherited your father's anxiety talents to become an assasin. Now you can slow down your heartbeat and shoot your PRC colleague.
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Originally posted by XiaoBunbun:
I am 23 years old and I don't have friends. Maybe that's why I got attitude problem, anti-social and don't know how to get along with people.
Some people just have different upbringing and background :(
"could not take in instructions properly. In short, I was inside my own world." - People there are trying to work as a team - to serve out the food to customer fast, yet you do not follow instruction, and work as a team, in your own world. You slow down everyone. Yep - you sabot the team - of course you get scolding.You don't have friends - you got attitude problem, anti-social, cannot get along with people, and pushy....
Great instead of looking to change for better - you simply blame your upbringing and background. By the way - blame sky and blame earth while you at it ....
You can blame everything also no use. Because yourself is the problem till you blame yourself and change.
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just tell them you got aids and you will spit into their food if they piss you off anymore
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Your personal experience here is very common. Maybe before anything, you could take a good look at your attitude first. You admitted yourself that you ignored them, you shouted back at them, you gave off attitudes and so on. Are all these traits of a co-worker desirable?
It doesn't necessary need to be an eye for an eye. Some of us, are unfortunately, are less well-endowed, and thus would be subjected to verbal abuse (e.g. fat girl) by shallow people who just couldn't look beyond the good of inner beauty. However, if you were to think over, if they were to throw stones at you, and you, instead of doing the same, throw bread back at them instead, don't you think it would have resulted in a different experience?
By taking a step back, its a form of self-defence, and definitely not a sign of weakness. You do not have to get back at them just to satisfy your ego. If you complain to your manager, are you aware of the repercussion that you would encounter in future? If you manage to clinch an interview for an office job, team work is very important, who would want to hire you if you're always giving a tit for a tat and learns even more negative stuff from your manager. Learn to forgive.
Btw, do you happen to have a very dao face?
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I think TS is indirectly telling you all that foreign workers/talents is destroying the fabric of young Singaporeans working state. Thru my EQ, that is his main objective.
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ts is not anti social......thread starter is just exhibiting what every person is doing at work.
listed below are anti social behaviour:
The following list sets out what behaviour the UK police classify as anti-social:[4]
- Substance misuse such as glue sniffing
- Drinking alcohol on the streets
- Problems related to animals such as not properly restraining animals in public places
- Begging
- Prostitution related activity such as curb crawling and loitering
- Abandoned vehicles that may or may not be stolen
- Vehicle nuisance such as “cruises” - revving car engines, racing, wheel spinning and horn sounding.
- Noise coming from business or industry
- Noise coming from alarms
- Noise coming from pubs and clubs
- Environmental damage such as graffiti and littering
- Inappropriate use of fireworks
- Inappropriate use of public space such as disputes among neighbours, rowdy or inconsiderate behaviour
- General drunken behaviour (which is rowdy or inconsiderate)
- Hoax calls to the emergency services
- Pubs or clubs serving alcohol after hours
- Malicious communication
- Hate incidents where abuse involves race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, age or disability
- Firearms incidents such as use of an imitation weapon
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Forget it. I already told my manager what I feel happening in my workplace (he was playing with me and using other colleagues to play with me too) But never mind, it taught me a lesson and gave me slight health and mental worries (geez)
I told him about the dynamics of the workplace and immediately he told me to quickly tender my resignation and also told me that I was incompetent and so on and so forth and asks me to find a better job....I could tell he was nervous and he knew that I knew he was playing with me!!!!
Yes, I admitted I was in the wrong.
But I admitted that I was taught a very valuable lesson but then again, it has cause me really serious mental problems the past few days ago...and I admitted it affect my studies a little. (Sorry im very sensitive)
I regretted not taking my medication.
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Originally posted by storywolf:
"could not take in instructions properly. In short, I was inside my own world." - People there are trying to work as a team - to serve out the food to customer fast, yet you do not follow instruction, and work as a team, in your own world. You slow down everyone. Yep - you sabot the team - of course you get scolding.You don't have friends - you got attitude problem, anti-social, cannot get along with people, and pushy....
Great instead of looking to change for better - you simply blame your upbringing and background. By the way - blame sky and blame earth while you at it ....
You can blame everything also no use. Because yourself is the problem till you blame yourself and change.
I didn't blame anyone...i was telling thr truth. Geez, stop reading literallly into everything.
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TS,
I can only say, the world/reality is like this, and it will not change for you. People who are not "strong" enough will be booted out. This is true everywhere.
Sure, you can complain to your manager and to the higher ups. But so what? History will repeat itself. Because the painful truth is that, "you are the problem". The problem is, you do not fit in. And you do not even put in the effort to try and fit in.
People will always want to be with someone who is agreeable and easy to get along with. Society will always treat people with better social skills and higher EQ, a ton better than those without these traits.
So all I can advice you to do is to try and improve on your people skills, evaluate yourself. Make improvements. I'm not asking you to do this so as to please others, but so that you can avoid future grief. Do it for yourself. Eventually you're the one who will benefit.
And yes, you should not have to face such treatment, no matter how lacking in EQ you are. But unfortunately, life is not a bed of roses. There are plenty of assholes out there who will cause pain and agony to others for their own benefit. So all you can do is to prevent such things from happening again. Either by turning into a hermit or by becoming strong enough. Since I don't think it's that feasible to be the former, I guess you can only be the latter.
PS: I don't think AA is a place for ranting (whinehouse is what you want), it's more like a place where you can seek advice/opinions from others.
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bonkers,
sometimes it is very difficult. you have to see the environment. have you worked in an envrionment with tons of bahliah all malaysians, their upbringing is in the jungle forest kampongs. they come you yo close and always wants to ask very personnel things, to the extend that they will sit there and wait for you to give up your 7mntonhs prayers stuff. they as an inspector only come into the engineer's office and sit there pump up aircon, even the local manager isnside also no one do anything the manager also bochap. woorse those china ones say something is wrong measurement out but never furbish data, the manager also scare that whore becasue hiring people is very difficult the hr controlled by one very temerpaamental account finance lady and his husband boyfirned the compnay boss. then yyou know. of corse society flavours people with EQ. but sometimes EQ is best applied when the situation calls for and worthy of it. that company i mentioned you see all malaysian chinese, malaysian malays ah bengs and they smoke everywhere tthey like. dirty place.
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Originally posted by troublemaker2005:
bonkers,
sometimes it is very difficult. you have to see the environment. have you worked in an envrionment with tons of bahliah all malaysians, their upbringing is in the jungle forest kampongs. they come you yo close and always wants to ask very personnel things, to the extend that they will sit there and wait for you to give up your 7mntonhs prayers stuff. they as an inspector only come into the engineer's office and sit there pump up aircon, even the local manager isnside also no one do anything the manager also bochap. woorse those china ones say something is wrong measurement out but never furbish data, the manager also scare that whore becasue hiring people is very difficult the hr controlled by one very temerpaamental account finance lady and his husband boyfirned the compnay boss. then yyou know. of corse society flavours people with EQ. but sometimes EQ is best applied when the situation calls for and worthy of it. that company i mentioned you see all malaysian chinese, malaysian malays ah bengs and they smoke everywhere tthey like. dirty place.
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Originally posted by XiaoBunbun:
Forget it. I already told my manager what I feel happening in my workplace (he was playing with me and using other colleagues to play with me too) But never mind, it taught me a lesson and gave me slight health and mental worries (geez)
I told him about the dynamics of the workplace and immediately he told me to quickly tender my resignation and also told me that I was incompetent and so on and so forth and asks me to find a better job....I could tell he was nervous and he knew that I knew he was playing with me!!!!
Yes, I admitted I was in the wrong.
But I admitted that I was taught a very valuable lesson but then again, it has cause me really serious mental problems the past few days ago...and I admitted it affect my studies a little. (Sorry im very sensitive)
I regretted not taking my medication.
ya, it is good that your resign, go back and hibernate yorself, if not, i guess your manager will end up taking more medicines than you
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Originally posted by angel7030:
ya, it is good that your resign, go back and hibernate yorself, if not, i guess your manager will end up taking more medicines than you
He does not need to take medicine. He is just a normal manager that uses people. Have you work before? Or are you your own boss??
He is a two-faced person.(what's new and so is everyone here except for one full-timer) and the hiring manager I asked him and the hiring manager on how to calculate my pay and they both gave two very different calculations.
Let's call the two-faced manager, manager A and another manager, which is the hiring manager B. (she is a nice manager and shows her true self) I went down to the outlet during morning and I asked the manager B about my discrapancies on my payslip and also PERFORMANCE PAY and she widened her eyes and named two of the previous ex-staff to ask and even told me to go manager A (which means I have dropped down as she hurriedly asked me to tender my resignation) Whoever goes to manager A, it means their performance are in danger or they asked too much unrelated things. And if manager A is always smiling or laughing with you, he is only mocking and even sometimes teaches you all the wrong things if you are working with him. It's best to see his angry expression and you know your doing things right.
And because I dropped down to him, I actually lied to him (through the phone and he angrily say to give him 5 mins) about wanting to get performance pay and he actually HAPPILY tell me that he can recommend me if I wanted to. (So very lol-worthy as i'm only a part-timer and on my payslip, there's no such thing as I've worked a few months and my performance sucks as I am always not part of the team or else I didn't know what the hell is going on in this workplace) Also, he have told me to see him personally at the outlet but I didn't want to because I know once I see him, I am finished and he would ask me to work more days (which translate to saying I am still not improving)
And then for that I tell him about what I feel going on in this workplace (teamwork) and he mumbled and got nervous and when I tell it to him, he started to yell and shouted at me saying I was incompetent and so on and so forth and I nearly cried on the phone.
He told me to quickly resign to find a better job.
I admitted that because of my unsociable traits and personality, it caused a breakdown on everyone. But I can't help it...even if I continue my medication (which only just to calm my nerves) I would also not fully understand social norms and the know-hows and people have been commented that I am impulsive,crazy and love to spout nonsense.
I've actually told my stepmum about what happened in the workplace and she also noticed something amissed with me the past few days and even tell me if she could ask my dad that i could be warded into the hospital.
But erms of course I got scared and said no and tell her i'm fine and she even asked me why I kept skipping school and she scolded me.
Yeah...so even if I go anywhere, I still have to control myself...which is quite difficult.
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take your medication. i had anxiety problems too. i took medication for 3 yrs and have recovered.
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Hey dragg, are you working right now or something?
How did you develop your anxiety problems?
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Originally posted by XiaoBunbun:
He does not need to take medicine. He is just a normal manager that uses people. Have you work before? Or are you your own boss??
He is a two-faced person.(what's new and so is everyone here except for one full-timer) and the hiring manager I asked him and the hiring manager on how to calculate my pay and they both gave two very different calculations.
Let's call the two-faced manager, manager A and another manager, which is the hiring manager B. (she is a nice manager and shows her true self) I went down to the outlet during morning and I asked the manager B about my discrapancies on my payslip and also PERFORMANCE PAY and she widened her eyes and named two of the previous ex-staff to ask and even told me to go manager A (which means I have dropped down as she hurriedly asked me to tender my resignation) Whoever goes to manager A, it means their performance are in danger or they asked too much unrelated things. And if manager A is always smiling or laughing with you, he is only mocking and even sometimes teaches you all the wrong things if you are working with him. It's best to see his angry expression and you know your doing things right.
And because I dropped down to him, I actually lied to him (through the phone and he angrily say to give him 5 mins) about wanting to get performance pay and he actually HAPPILY tell me that he can recommend me if I wanted to. (So very lol-worthy as i'm only a part-timer and on my payslip, there's no such thing as I've worked a few months and my performance sucks as I am always not part of the team or else I didn't know what the hell is going on in this workplace) Also, he have told me to see him personally at the outlet but I didn't want to because I know once I see him, I am finished and he would ask me to work more days (which translate to saying I am still not improving)
And then for that I tell him about what I feel going on in this workplace (teamwork) and he mumbled and got nervous and when I tell it to him, he started to yell and shouted at me saying I was incompetent and so on and so forth and I nearly cried on the phone.
He told me to quickly resign to find a better job.
I admitted that because of my unsociable traits and personality, it caused a breakdown on everyone. But I can't help it...even if I continue my medication (which only just to calm my nerves) I would also not fully understand social norms and the know-hows and people have been commented that I am impulsive,crazy and love to spout nonsense.
I've actually told my stepmum about what happened in the workplace and she also noticed something amissed with me the past few days and even tell me if she could ask my dad that i could be warded into the hospital.
But erms of course I got scared and said no and tell her i'm fine and she even asked me why I kept skipping school and she scolded me.
Yeah...so even if I go anywhere, I still have to control myself...which is quite difficult.
My present manager also like yours. Uses pple and a weather man an 2 faces manager.
How I survive so long? We have a organised team colleagues, that work together think and thin. We already know my manager attitude and behaviour. We tried to detour whenever he come. He tried not to talk to him too much. We will not let him disturb our life and control our life. We happy work in the company knowing that he is a seow dog every morning barking at us. We treat this a joke.
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Btw, likeyou..do you happen to work at an mnc?
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Originally posted by XiaoBunbun:
Hey dragg, are you working right now or something?
How did you develop your anxiety problems?
i got it after i lost my job 7 years ago.
