*Troubled* by parent's objection
-
Originally posted by InVaa:U SAY UNTILL LIKE U AND UR BF TOGETHER VERY DISGRACE LIKE THAT.. i am sure he will be damn hurt..
shouldnt each other feel proud of their bf/gf.. guy will change when they get married 1 mar.. u dun expect 21 yr old guy wif ur dad characteristic right?
She's not saying her bf is a disgrace to her... I was the one who requested for her to tell me the things that I need to know... She's just supplying me with all the neccessary information.... -
Originally posted by J fellow:
dont understand why u gers are so into astrology. thinks its all a bunch of crap!!
She's not the one who's into astrology... I am... Well... To a certain extent...?
Yup... I love CRAPS....
-
anyway.... most gers thinks the worlds bout their bfs like they are the greatest gers around and extremely good looking... but after they break up, they think otherwise... and mostly their friends from a third party point of view is in fact very true!!
-
Words of critism? For example?
they would critise how bad /useless he is.this kind of thing. anyway, although it hurts a lot, but i am not going to take into consideraton these kind of direct insults. my dad always gave bad comments w/o showing any kind of evidence. thats why i always ignore and be tolerant of him. he used to say things like, " he is one whos selfish , shrewd and make use of ppl" but from what i see , i doubt so.
i knoe that love is blind and it always prevent you from seeing a person's bad pts. but come to think of it, how can one control their own emotions abt this? How are their studies..? Are they much of a headache to your parents...?
my sis got gd grades.but my bro is quite lazy and slack, but his grades are avg I see... You mentioned that he is tolerant with your unreasonable acts PREVIOUSLY? How's the situation like now...?
one of the biggest unreasonable acts, i think u can refer 2 the prev topic i posted : confused and insecure How bad is bad? How long ago was those fierce conflicts? Did your parents mentioned anything at all during that period?
i used to pick up quarrels with him(big and small things) nearly every month. screaming and venting my frustration on him. coz i got a quick temper , whenever i m angry , my emotions always run high ( and i am very sturrbon in admiting my own mistakes coz i want to be the winner of the quarrel) but after a while , i will forget and cool down. the quarrels wen on coz he couldnt make me cool down
my parents , esp mother says" forget abt him and find someone else, since cant get together" BUT i fee that "easier said than done" That is what you think...? They might view things differently...? Ever had any past relationship(s)?
we are both each other 1st gf n bf .thats why when probs comes up, sometimes loss in handling it. -
Originally posted by peacely:
Yup... Up to this point... If my ASSUMPTION is true, the main issue is indeed YOU.... I still don't know your dad's sign... But he might be a little going offside for a while... (though he's still a crucial character...)
they would critise how bad /useless he is.this kind of thing. anyway, although it hurts a lot, but i am not going to take into consideraton these kind of direct insults. my dad always gave bad comments w/o showing any kind of evidence. thats why i always ignore and be tolerant of him. he used to say things like, " he is one whos selfish , shrewd and make use of ppl" but from what i see , i doubt so. i knoe that love is blind and it always prevent you from seeing a person's bad pts. but come to think of it, how can one control their own emotions abt this?
Hmm... Your dad's pretty old...? How's business for him..?
my sis got gd grades.but my bro is quite lazy and slack, but his grades are avg
Hmm...
one of the biggest unreasonable acts, i think u can refer 2 the prev topic i posted : confused and insecure
You think he's the one being unreasonable or you...?
i used to pick up quarrels with him(big and small things) nearly every month. screaming and venting my frustration on him. coz i got a quick temper , whenever i m angry , my emotions always run high ( and i am very sturrbon in admiting my own mistakes coz i want to be the winner of the quarrel) but after a while , i will forget and cool down. the quarrels wen on coz he couldnt make me cool down
my parents , esp mother says" forget abt him and find someone else, since cant get together" BUT i fee that "easier said than done"
"Easier said than done"...? Yup... Perhaps you're right...?
we are both each other 1st gf n bf .thats why when probs comes up, sometimes loss in handling it.
Ok....
You're the main STIR of the whole issue... Your parents are rather 'inexperienced' I would presume in 'modern dating'... Especially so for your dad... He should be kinda 'backward'... Your mum should be able to accept things better than him...
Your parents are naturally PROTECTIVE of you... Because you're their daughter... Because you love them... And because you're a girl....
I'm kinda 'surprised' by the qualities your bf has displayed... And not sure how far they've been degraded...? Hmm... I think you can 'sense' it too...? That's why you're rather relunctant to give him up...? Giving him up earlier would be for the better of him but a loss on your part... (If he hasn't change much yet...)
Your bf is kinda a 'rare species' for his characteristics..? Perhaps he've already changed (or beginning to change..?) I don't know... But probably because of the fact that this is his 1st relationship so he's still 'fresh'... Which is actually a GOOD thing....
If you combine BOTH the MAIN REPLIES I've made to you in this thread & in your previous thread, you should roughly get the whole picture....?
~good luck.... -
[quote]Originally posted by Devil1976:
[b]
I'm kinda 'surprised' by the qualities your bf has displayed... And not sure how far they've been degraded...? Hmm... I think you can 'sense' it too...? That's why you're rather relunctant to give him up...? Giving him up earlier would be for the better of him but a loss on your part... (If he hasn't change much yet...)
Your bf is kinda a 'rare species' for his characteristics..? Perhaps he've already changed (or beginning to change..?) I don't know... But probably because of the fact that this is his 1st relationship so he's still 'fresh'... Which is actually a GOOD thing....
can you be more direct ? what kind of "qualities" are you surprised at? and why did u mention"rare species"? -
if it was me.. heck care abt parents.
-
if it was me.. heck care abt parents.
-
that he is able to tolerate your very imperfect behavior. that you would always argue and refuse to admit your mistakes even though u are in the wrong, he stills forgives u. you better improve your behavior if u ask me, if u want to keep him... he really is too good for u. bahOriginally posted by peacely:[quote]Originally posted by Devil1976:
[b]
I'm kinda 'surprised' by the qualities your bf has displayed... And not sure how far they've been degraded...? Hmm... I think you can 'sense' it too...? That's why you're rather relunctant to give him up...? Giving him up earlier would be for the better of him but a loss on your part... (If he hasn't change much yet...)
Your bf is kinda a 'rare species' for his characteristics..? Perhaps he've already changed (or beginning to change..?) I don't know... But probably because of the fact that this is his 1st relationship so he's still 'fresh'... Which is actually a GOOD thing....
can you be more direct ? what kind of "qualities" are you surprised at? and why did u mention"rare species"? -
dear peacely,
everyone also have their own good and bad pts, but i think what you should know is that in a relationship the feelings of being together is very important.
its how you feel when you are with him, or how you feel when you see/feel when you encounter the bad side of him... do you think you can actually accept his bad points? remember, if you are going for a long term relationship, accepting his bad points is very important... cos that is his flaw.
if you think that you cant accept it, then its time you considering to let go of him and find another guy. of cos i think its not easy for you as he is your first bf.
its more important of how you feels/sees as comments from other people aint that important. i dont see why shld you beliving in other people comments be it your parents or best friends? perhaps i am contridicting here, but you can hear your parents comments(cos at times they are right) and it doesnt mean after hearing it you have to follow?
cheers -
Time will prove things and by then u can be sure............
-
VERY CLOSE if not on the dot... This 'feature' of him usually not so easy to be found when he's seasoned enough... It's kinda natural for this characteristic of his to wilter off with time UNLESS you do something to PRESERVE it.... It's definitely a 'bonus' and quite a 'rarity' INDEED.... But the way you're treating him for now is....Originally posted by dumbdumb!:that he is able to tolerate your very imperfect behavior. that you would always argue and refuse to admit your mistakes even though u are in the wrong, he stills forgives u. you better improve your behavior if u ask me, if u want to keep him... he really is too good for u. bah Partial advantage in display because if you give in too much to him he probably won't treasure you enough.... But too much of this over a longer period and you'll probably see the 'appropriate' changes in him in time to come...?