flirting behind my back
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Then... lets ALL bless U, me, EVERY1 in dis WORLD!!! or Matrix......Originally posted by harryryan:actually i might belong to that group.... but onli when love is concerned
Love is blind as they say but i hope i can wake up b4 i get 2 seriously hurted.
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Dun luff... yr mouth will get BIGGER... Lolx!!!Originally posted by xUe_ReN:
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thanks guys
i feel better now after reading the posts and talking to a couple of ppl here.. -
ha...but what's ur decision?tell us n stick by it k....no backing down.otherwise our saliva all go to waste liao.Originally posted by Sunshine08:thanks guys
i feel better now after reading the posts and talking to a couple of ppl here.. -
inspiringOriginally posted by jOhO:i believe it's not what u do now that matters. it's how u feel. if this thing is gonna nag at u even if u confront him or not, then wat's the point? it's about how u are gonna get urself to trust him, and have no worries about him flirting. he can even be flirting in front of u and u wouldn't be affected. of course i'm not saying that this is wat he should do. it about how u decide to view the situation. sometimes, i understand, it's hard to control how u feel.
out of topic abit. just wanna talk about such situations. there is one "rule" that comes to my head. "what you don't know can't hurt you". maybe this passage i'm about to type refers to ur bf, for this case. he, stupidly flirts with a girl online and LEAVES proof, and now he should suffer the consequences. had he not left a history behind, none of this would have happened. i believe (since u do) he treats you like his princess and wouldn't dream of betraying u in real life, but why throw a spanner in the works by letting u find out something like this which was done in the name of fun or even boredom? to all of u reading out there, the statement of "what you don't know can't hurt u" refers to all the things that u do that could LEAD to ur other half finding out and being unhappy about, even if it's done without any harmful intent whatsoever.
the reason why i feel this is important in a reln is becos sometimes it's not what we DO that bothers the other person, it's what they BELIEVE. just an obvious example, if i came home one day and caught my gf in bed (clothed) with another guy, and she says they were just lying there tokking cock, u think i'm gonna BELIEVE that even if what she said is the truth? (pls don't say it's her brother or cousin or wat. even my BEST friend wouldn't or shouldn't be lying in MY bed with MY gf rite?)
anyway back to the topic, let's really hope that ur guy is a good man, and that u get over this apprehension of urs quick smart. whatever u do (confront or not) isn't wrong, it's just how you decide to deal with it. i wrote this in effort to bring up a point, which is not what he did, but what u believe, what u think is happening. if u truly believe in this reln, then try ur best to get rid of all those negative thoughts. confronting him may help, it may not. u know better.
hope things get better soon!
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erm.... from my point of view... maybe your BF bery handsome...
then he would feel bery wasted if he nv make full use of his resources... maybe he loves u alot...but he jus wan to flirt ard a little bit...to prove that he is still attractive maybe.... cos tats wat happen to mi.... hee..... i was like tat once..... bery difficult to control....i knoe i love the gal bery much and i knoe the flirting part will nv haf any outcome. jus feel like doing for thr thrill of it... hee... my point of view... i think its best that u tok to him slowly...in a tactful way.. guys dont like to be checked.....
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my decision is..not to confront....
i hope my decision is right...
i will take time to get over it -
I like this post of urs......Originally posted by jOhO:i believe it's not what u do now that matters. it's how u feel. if this thing is gonna nag at u even if u confront him or not, then wat's the point? it's about how u are gonna get urself to trust him, and have no worries about him flirting. he can even be flirting in front of u and u wouldn't be affected. of course i'm not saying that this is wat he should do. it about how u decide to view the situation. sometimes, i understand, it's hard to control how u feel.
out of topic abit. just wanna talk about such situations. there is one "rule" that comes to my head. "what you don't know can't hurt you". maybe this passage i'm about to type refers to ur bf, for this case. he, stupidly flirts with a girl online and LEAVES proof, and now he should suffer the consequences. had he not left a history behind, none of this would have happened. i believe (since u do) he treats you like his princess and wouldn't dream of betraying u in real life, but why throw a spanner in the works by letting u find out something like this which was done in the name of fun or even boredom? to all of u reading out there, the statement of "what you don't know can't hurt u" refers to all the things that u do that could LEAD to ur other half finding out and being unhappy about, even if it's done without any harmful intent whatsoever.
the reason why i feel this is important in a reln is becos sometimes it's not what we DO that bothers the other person, it's what they BELIEVE. just an obvious example, if i came home one day and caught my gf in bed (clothed) with another guy, and she says they were just lying there tokking cock, u think i'm gonna BELIEVE that even if what she said is the truth? (pls don't say it's her brother or cousin or wat. even my BEST friend wouldn't or shouldn't be lying in MY bed with MY gf rite?)
anyway back to the topic, let's really hope that ur guy is a good man, and that u get over this apprehension of urs quick smart. whatever u do (confront or not) isn't wrong, it's just how you decide to deal with it. i wrote this in effort to bring up a point, which is not what he did, but what u believe, what u think is happening. if u truly believe in this reln, then try ur best to get rid of all those negative thoughts. confronting him may help, it may not. u know better.
hope things get better soon! 
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Well, i hope you are right..hopefully hes like you then...Originally posted by Ray of faith:erm.... from my point of view... maybe your BF bery handsome...
then he would feel bery wasted if he nv make full use of his resources... maybe he loves u alot...but he jus wan to flirt ard a little bit...to prove that he is still attractive maybe.... cos tats wat happen to mi.... hee..... i was like tat once..... bery difficult to control....i knoe i love the gal bery much and i knoe the flirting part will nv haf any outcome. jus feel like doing for thr thrill of it... hee... my point of view... i think its best that u tok to him slowly...in a tactful way.. guys dont like to be checked..... -
Originally posted by Sunshine08:I was at my boyfriend's house playing his computer..
while he was not around..
i actually went to click a nick on his icq...and read the message history..
And i saw he was flirting behind my back...
he was asking like whether she miss him or not..
then give gdnight kiss...
should i confront him? overall their conversation only look like flirting...i know hes not doing this to me in real life ....
he treat me good in real life...
what should i do?Im afraid of losing this relationship or spoil this relationship...trust... and so...
I am miserable now because i know whats going on but im not confronting him about it...
u dun hav 2 beliv me..but i actuali practis online flirt 2 use on my GF.. -
The problem now is that this relationship is still intact while you are having this dreadful feeling that you guy might be drifting and you could lose this relationship.Originally posted by Sunshine08:I was at my boyfriend's house playing his computer..
while he was not around..
i actually went to click a nick on his icq...and read the message history..
And i saw he was flirting behind my back...
he was asking like whether she miss him or not..
then give gdnight kiss...
should i confront him? overall their conversation only look like flirting...i know hes not doing this to me in real life ....
he treat me good in real life...
what should i do?Im afraid of losing this relationship or spoil this relationship...trust... and so...
I am miserable now because i know whats going on but im not confronting him about it...
We shouldn't look at it from the preception on whether this relationship is doomed to failure or not, rather the main issue is what your boyfriend's definition of your relation, his inner thoughts, and deepest feelings is.
Advice?
When a guy start to flirt around, BUT treats his gf good - it shows cheap thrills that he is revelling in. But, where does you stand in his heart - I can't conclude from looking at your words alone. You HAVE to speak and talk to him about.
Don't start pointing fingers and trash things; speak in cool voice and handle this matter rationally. When talking to him, appear emotionless, neither anger nor worried, just be yourself like a normal average day. He will be shocked and stunned when you talk to him - do it in a way right, probably he will seek for your forgiveness.
Remember your way of handling cannot be offensive in nature. Communication is the key - Well, benefit of the doubt is given for first time offender.
Then whats next? (Think Starhub )
You could try two ways; after the communication, the proper talk, life continues and be happy with it - he would treat you better in a way, at first.
OR, during the communication, ask him IF there is still anything he is keeping away from you. If he were to say now, forgiveness will be there. Warn him if one day, he were to be caught red-handed on something - that's the end since it is multiple sins; Lying, breach of trust, disloyal, etc.
P.S: Everyone should have a chance, but after the first one given, its gone forever.
Cheers -
pleasure is all mine.Originally posted by Sunshine08:I like this post of urs...... -
buayaOriginally posted by jOhO:pleasure is all mine. -
-__- " People not like you lah....Originally posted by kopiosatu:buaya -
jeez... u really have to know when it's serious and when it's not man...Originally posted by kopiosatu:buaya -
Well i tihnk u should confront ur bf. Cos if not it will keep inside ur heart n u will not trust him anymore. U should try tok to him. I got into tis kind of suituation b4 where i didnt confront my ex...i hate him more instead of continue loving him. i begin to get suspicious of him and our relationship turn sour and we broke off...
Trust mi have a gd tok wif him....All the best to U!! -
x 2Originally posted by He77AnGeL:Well i tihnk u should confront ur bf. Cos if not it will keep inside ur heart n u will not trust him anymore. U should try tok to him. I got into tis kind of suituation b4 where i didnt confront my ex...i hate him more instead of continue loving him. i begin to get suspicious of him and our relationship turn sour and we broke off...
Trust mi have a gd tok wif him....All the best to U!!
yah will b losing the trust rite???
but i did confront my bf b4 over something in icq...... but he scold me for checking his stuff....... then he say they juz talk talk lah..... don mean anything one......
i mean if juz verbal flirt, mayb still ok / acceptable.......
not as in getting touchy when they mt up or reali hug n kiss other gals in front of me...... tat i couldn't take it 