Just feel like writing it down...
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i also need to write something...'i'm sorry Dad'
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hey, find a ger who is decisive......you just happen to be there when she needed comfort and solace..sadly, you dun mean as much to her as you will liked yourself to think...u were just a substitute nothing else....u can continue thinking about it and it just wont go away..you wont die from this will you? channel ur time and effort to something else...
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I know i might sound harsh.
But get OVEr IT. Such bitches aint worth ur time. As i've mentioned, Sg girls think too highly of themselves. I knwo she might seem the world to u, but u must learn to exercise self control and time will heal all wounds. This type of girls i've seen all too many liao, she wouldn't just do these to u, it'l be the same for other guys. Screwed up girls with screwed up mentality trying to emulate the western thinking. All wanna live the high life but they know Shit.
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Originally posted by Insightist:I know i might sound harsh.
But get OVEr IT. Such bitches aint worth ur time. As i've mentioned, Sg girls think too highly of themselves. I knwo she might seem the world to u, but u must learn to exercise self control and time will heal all wounds. This type of girls i've seen all too many liao, she wouldn't just do these to u, it'l be the same for other guys. Screwed up girls with screwed up mentality trying to emulate the western thinking. All wanna live the high life but they know Shit. 
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not all Sg girls are like what u think k?Originally posted by Insightist:I know i might sound harsh.
But get OVEr IT. Such bitches aint worth ur time. As i've mentioned, Sg girls think too highly of themselves. I knwo she might seem the world to u, but u must learn to exercise self control and time will heal all wounds. This type of girls i've seen all too many liao, she wouldn't just do these to u, it'l be the same for other guys. Screwed up girls with screwed up mentality trying to emulate the western thinking. All wanna live the high life but they know Shit.
but for this case i agree tt this ger belongs to the f*** up category..
as a female being, i despise her..
GOiN^CrAzY^SooN: u are being made use of.. she's treating u as a spare tyre only.. stop thinking tt she loves you and how come she can change totally in a flash.. bcos such gers are just cheap! wake up, i'm sure u will find a better 1
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Yeap...i should explain more clearly.
Not all the girls are like that, sorry. There are some who are really nice. But u have to be lucky to meet them. -
To all,
I am sorry to have made you misunderstood her..but she is not the kind of person that some of you have so wrongly wrote..she is everything I could ever ask for..maybe more..I know for a fact..cos she really loves her bf a lot..I wish and wish that one day I might be on the receiving end but recently I realised that this is one dream I will never have..
I have been thinking a lot..and I think that she had just rush into a relationship with me without thinking about it..and she realised she made a mistake..therefore, she decided to go back to her bf..maybe that's what happen and not about her playing around with my feelings..I don't know..I really don't know..
I was just on the phone call with her a minute ago..and she was saying that she is really happy now..and that her bf is treating her really well after our incident..so I guess it's better this way..but somehow I can't seem to get her out of my mind..day and night I keep thinking about her...
Yesterday I did a very stupid thing which I know would not do much to alleviate the matters at hand...but I can't stand it...so I went out to get myself really drunk hoping to get her out of my mind for a few hours...but somehow..I ended up crying in front of my friends..I really couldn't control my feelings..
*Sighs*....
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"If I were in Hell and you were in Heaven,
I'd always look up and be proud of you.
But, if I were in Heaven and you were in Hell,
I'd ask God to send me down,
because Heaven isn't Heaven without you." -
Let out ur frustrations..its the onli way..else u can realli go crazy sometimes....seems strange...wat u did reminds me of myself...i felt the same way, did the same things...
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Trying screaming underwater in a swimming pool, no one can hear you also. Great way to vent out your frustrations. Jogging and lifting weights also great way to channel your frustrations too. Hey, who knows you might start picking up a healthy lifestyle? Live your life such that she regrets dumping you.
Take this time to upgrade yourself, but then again, don't be obsessed with improving yourself just to prove a point to her. Live it for yourself. Be brave!
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but if u really think about why the ger behaved the way she did..actually was bcos her bf neglected her and didnt care for her..and i can safely say tht most guys are guilty of this someway along in any relationship..so guys are indirectly caused all these...
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Dear all,
I was actually going to pen down my last note which was suppose to go along the following lines. I wanted to say that I finally managed to try and forget her already...Cos I called her up and told her that I don't think we should be contacting each other anymore and that it would feel weird if I were to call her when her bf is around..she said ok...and I told her that I will call her on her birthday next year...we then said our respective good-bye two days ago...I cried so badly that day...but then I feel that this is at least one step forward...the day after that was a terrible day for me...I so missed her voice that I wanted to call her but I did try so hard and I did indeed not call her...but unfortunately she ran into some problems...and she called me and asked me if I had time to talk...I said yes and we talked again...I tried to cheer her up cos she was very frustrated about her problem..and she felt alright then...
But now...here I am again stranded in the middle of nowhere...why is it that everytime I tried so hard to leave...I somehow keep coming back...*sighs*...I can't help but feel wanting to cheer her up whenever she's unhappy...just hearing her laugh so innocently is enough to make my day...but I hate the feelings after that...the feeling of loving her secretly...I hate it so much...
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�£�ûËûÊÇÕæµÄ±ÈÎÒ߀Ҫ�ÛÄã, ÎҲŕþ±Æ×Ô¼ºëxé_..... -
Hey..its time u move on lay..tell her how u feel and then it tell her how u have been feeling so far...let her choose lor...its either u or the bf....
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A friend can do the same...Originally posted by GOiN^CrAzY^SooN:Dear all,
I was actually going to pen down my last note which was suppose to go along the following lines. I wanted to say that I finally managed to try and forget her already...Cos I called her up and told her that I don't think we should be contacting each other anymore and that it would feel weird if I were to call her when her bf is around..she said ok...and I told her that I will call her on her birthday next year...we then said our respective good-bye two days ago...I cried so badly that day...but then I feel that this is at least one step forward...the day after that was a terrible day for me...I so missed her voice that I wanted to call her but I did try so hard and I did indeed not call her...but unfortunately she ran into some problems...and she called me and asked me if I had time to talk...I said yes and we talked again...I tried to cheer her up cos she was very frustrated about her problem..and she felt alright then...
But now...here I am again stranded in the middle of nowhere...why is it that everytime I tried so hard to leave...I somehow keep coming back...*sighs*...I can't help but feel wanting to cheer her up whenever she's unhappy...just hearing her laugh so innocently is enough to make my day...but I hate the feelings after that...the feeling of loving her secretly...I hate it so much...
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�£�ûËûÊÇÕæµÄ±ÈÎÒ߀Ҫ�ÛÄã, ÎҲŕþ±Æ×Ô¼ºëxé_..... -
i agreeOriginally posted by raraninja:Hey..its time u move on lay..tell her how u feel and then it tell her how u have been feeling so far...let her choose lor...its either u or the bf....
and furthermore i wonder if she's unable to confide in her boyfriend? summore have to MEET u up despite all the wonders in modern communication be it MSN, etc etc
u do stand a chance... trust me
but nevertheless, i think u shd be true to her as a friend first. relationships can come later. there's absolutely no hurry for a r/s here IMHO..., since everythings going fine
but ask yourself first
do you TRULY LOVE her?
not as friends... but can forsee ur future together? otherwise... i think time to back off... be there for her but reconsider and keep on self-reflecting
if theres no pure self reflection... the relationship will NEVER last. because of other motives in the r/s.
thats one of the reasons why most teenagers get into MANY relationships initially... and end up being burnt or whatsoever... because they refuse to do self reflection/soul searching. -
*sighs* Here I am again...My heart is crushed to the point where I no longer find anything meaningful...Well, I talked to a friend of mine recently about my problems and she told me a lot of things which I find to be logical, so I was really cleared in my mind and I decided to give up on her...but she called me up again not too long ago...and told me that she couldn't contact her bf for whatever reasons I am not too sure...but she called me up to say that she's feeling really bad...that she's missing her bf like mad...I kept listening quietly to all that she has to say...I really couldn't stand it at all...I hung up on her before she realised that I am crying...*sighs* I gave up on her a few days back....but yesterday I gave up on all my hopes...I gave up on my love for her...I feel so lifeless now...I keep telling myself that she means nothing to me...but my heart somehow telling me otherwise...I feel as if I am at the crossroads of my life with so many routes to take but all of them seems to come back to the same place...I say that I gave up on her...but I miss her so badly...I miss everything about her...I really don't know how to control my feelings...I feel like a hopeless and useless person right now....
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Some people say that you don't know
what you have until you lose it,
but it wasn't like that for me.
I always knew what I had,
I just never thought I would lose it.... -
You don't have to LIE to yourself. You know you won't be able to achieve that probably? It's a FACT, you LOVE her (or be it an infactuation... Whatever...).... But that doesn't mean life don't go on from that point on... Can you recall the time when you were a child? When you really wanted a toy or something so BADLY and your mum just say 'no' for whatever reason...? And you just thought you wanted it SO BADLY... You might even think about it for nights... Cried over it... But TODAY, you probably ain't even thinking much about it... Or can you even remember it? YES, sometimes its GOOD to GO for what you want in life... But you'll also have to UNDERSTAND... Life is not a PERFECT RAINBOW... Once in a while you'll just have to MISS OUT on some things....Originally posted by GOiN^CrAzY^SooN:*sighs* Here I am again...My heart is crushed to the point where I no longer find anything meaningful...Well, I talked to a friend of mine recently about my problems and she told me a lot of things which I find to be logical, so I was really cleared in my mind and I decided to give up on her...but she called me up again not too long ago...and told me that she couldn't contact her bf for whatever reasons I am not too sure...but she called me up to say that she's feeling really bad...that she's missing her bf like mad...I kept listening quietly to all that she has to say...I really couldn't stand it at all...I hung up on her before she realised that I am crying...*sighs* I gave up on her a few days back....but yesterday I gave up on all my hopes...I gave up on my love for her...I feel so lifeless now...I keep telling myself that she means nothing to me...but my heart somehow telling me otherwise...I feel as if I am at the crossroads of my life with so many routes to take but all of them seems to come back to the same place...I say that I gave up on her...but I miss her so badly...I miss everything about her...I really don't know how to control my feelings...I feel like a hopeless and useless person right now....
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Some people say that you don't know
what you have until you lose it,
but it wasn't like that for me.
I always knew what I had,
I just never thought I would lose it.... -
well said my manOriginally posted by Devil1976:You don't have to LIE to yourself. You know you won't be able to achieve that probably? It's a FACT, you LOVE her (or be it an infactuation... Whatever...).... But that doesn't mean life don't go on from that point on... Can you recall the time when you were a child? When you really wanted a toy or something so BADLY and your mum just say 'no' for whatever reason...? And you just thought you wanted it SO BADLY... You might even think about it for nights... Cried over it... But TODAY, you probably ain't even thinking much about it... Or can you even remember it? YES, sometimes its GOOD to GO for what you want in life... But you'll also have to UNDERSTAND... Life is not a PERFECT RAINBOW... Once in a while you'll just have to MISS OUT on some things....
if she's yours, heaven will ensure she'll be yours forever
remember some things are preedestined... especially love. i mean im sure u noe many UNLIKELY people finally fell in love and lived happily ever after
but if u really think abt it so much tt it affects ur life/future... u think she'll pity u meh? -
To all,
Just wanted to let you all know that I just had a talk with her and I told her that I still thought of her quite often and the way we keep getting on with our conversation is very unbearable for me...So I told her that we should cool of for a few months and hopefully that we will still remain friends in the near future...This is the biggest and worst step that I have taken since we met...I don't if it's better this way or it is going to make me feel better...but there's actually nothing much I can do at this stage...She told me that I made her realised who is more important to her in her heart and she thanked me for that...*sighs* I really couldn't stand it when she told me that...Well, I guess it's fate...My luck's never good in love...Now, I am just hoping to get my life back on track...It's breaking my heart...but I have no choice at all...For the very last time, I do love her with all my heart and would've done anything in this world just to be with her again...but unfortunately loving someone is just not enough...I really miss her a lot...*sighs* I really leave my everything to fate already...
If I could have one lifetime wish,
one wish that would come true,
I'd pray to God with all my heart,
for the chance to hold you close to me once again....
I love her so much.... -
It takes someone to replace someone....the pain will go away just like dat..
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forget her. she's not urs..
u were just someone who she could fall back on when she needed.
not that u were taken for a ride.. it's just that it's obvious that her heart is not with you. -
It's been days since I last posted in here...but here I am again...It's been better for the last few days...I thought of her less than I did beforehand...but I still do...*sighs* I went out to have fun with my friends..spend on things for myself which I rarely did before...you could see me laughing and smiling as if nothing's on my mind at all...but at the end of the day...as I lay on my bed...I can't help but think if all I have done today...was just a form of deceit to myself...
I went to a firework's display two nights ago...it was so beautiful you could never have imagined it any better...when I was looking at the sky...with all the fireworks...there and then...I kept my eyes closed...and I made a wish...I thought of the many wishes that I could've made...wishing that we would be together once again...but then I realised such a wish would be selfish...and I did wish...but I wished that she is happy the way she is right now...
Sometimes I have asked myself...what would have been if I have never met her before...but then I have laughed and thought that if I was given a chance to walk down this road again...I would have done it again...for all the pain and sorrow in my heart...could never have compared with the times that we have spent together...I am stupid...yes I am....but I am glad that I am...Cos I was at least truly happy during those times...
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For all sad words of tongue or pen. The saddest are these, 'What might have been?'..... -
Hi,
First of all, I can understand your feelings. The feelings of loving someone so deeply and realise that the two of you cannot be together. But deep in your heart, you are still not willing to give up.
You are hopping that there might still be a chance, even if it's once in a million chance and you are willing to wait for it. To me, I feel that you are waiting for a miracle although you are trying to tell yourself that you are not.
I have been through it myself. A girl whom I have love deeply for the past 9 years. Same as you, whenever she quarreled with her bf, she will tell me about it and I always stand by her. She will also tell me how she shares the happiness moments with her bf. It's her first bf and they are already together eversince they are in their teens. All this ended after one incident which is 3 years ago. She quarreled again with her bf and as per usual, she confide in me. But this time, it's different. She became very close to me and we can chat daily for at least 4 hours. But in my heart, I know that I am just a good friend since she haven't left her bf officially. But yet, we are so close.
Only until one day while we are chatting over the phone, I realise that she still loves her bf and I also realise that it is unfair for her if I take advantage of this situation since she is not totally clear in her mind. It's really hard for me to come out with a decision since I have been waiting for 7 years for this moment. But eventually, I voiced out that we should stop all this. And I am really cruel to her that night. She just wants to find a good friend to confide in her problem and yet, I crushed it. Only after the incident, she told me that she is actually considering to give up her bf and be with me. But what I did has made her hold back all her consideration.
I really suffer and bleed in my heart even until now. But I know that situations might not be any different even if I hold on to her and without crushing her hopes that night. She might still go back to her bf after she clear her thoughts and I still, will just remain as a good friend. I really hate myself that night for not able to hold on to her even as a good friend. Do I love her deep enough? The answer is Yes. But why did I crush her hopes that night if I truely loves her? The answer is because by loving her so deeply, I really don't want to be unfair to her. I do not want to take advantage of her emotions and be unfair to her bf as well since I can sense that they loves each other deeply. And I choose to suffer myself.
Although after the incident, which happens three years ago, I try to win back her heart after her emotions are much clearer. But I failed again and again. Until this year, I realise that they are no longer together but our relationship are also different now. She doesn't confide in me anymore. I know I cannot blame anyone since it's me who failed to hold on to her.
To me, I find that at least she can still confide in you, you should be happy. At least she is still willing to chat with you and share her happy moments with you. I know the feeling is painful having to listen to her happy moments with her bf. But please stand by her and just be her friend. At least try to be just her friend. If there are times when you cannot control your emotions, just let go for a while and give yourself a break without contacting her. She will appreciate you. Love cannot be force. If she loves you, she will love you. If she doesn't, no matter how hard you try, she will just be grateful to you.
Grateful is definitely not love. -
The best thread so far....wish u good luck in ur pursuit of true loveOriginally posted by darrendon:Hi,
First of all, I can understand your feelings. The feelings of loving someone so deeply and realise that the two of you cannot be together. But deep in your heart, you are still not willing to give up.
You are hopping that there might still be a chance, even if it's once in a million chance and you are willing to wait for it. To me, I feel that you are waiting for a miracle although you are trying to tell yourself that you are not.
I have been through it myself. A girl whom I have love deeply for the past 9 years. Same as you, whenever she quarreled with her bf, she will tell me about it and I always stand by her. She will also tell me how she shares the happiness moments with her bf. It's her first bf and they are already together eversince they are in their teens. All this ended after one incident which is 3 years ago. She quarreled again with her bf and as per usual, she confide in me. But this time, it's different. She became very close to me and we can chat daily for at least 4 hours. But in my heart, I know that I am just a good friend since she haven't left her bf officially. But yet, we are so close.
Only until one day while we are chatting over the phone, I realise that she still loves her bf and I also realise that it is unfair for her if I take advantage of this situation since she is not totally clear in her mind. It's really hard for me to come out with a decision since I have been waiting for 7 years for this moment. But eventually, I voiced out that we should stop all this. And I am really cruel to her that night. She just wants to find a good friend to confide in her problem and yet, I crushed it. Only after the incident, she told me that she is actually considering to give up her bf and be with me. But what I did has made her hold back all her consideration.
I really suffer and bleed in my heart even until now. But I know that situations might not be any different even if I hold on to her and without crushing her hopes that night. She might still go back to her bf after she clear her thoughts and I still, will just remain as a good friend. I really hate myself that night for not able to hold on to her even as a good friend. Do I love her deep enough? The answer is Yes. But why did I crush her hopes that night if I truely loves her? The answer is because by loving her so deeply, I really don't want to be unfair to her. I do not want to take advantage of her emotions and be unfair to her bf as well since I can sense that they loves each other deeply. And I choose to suffer myself.
Although after the incident, which happens three years ago, I try to win back her heart after her emotions are much clearer. But I failed again and again. Until this year, I realise that they are no longer together but our relationship are also different now. She doesn't confide in me anymore. I know I cannot blame anyone since it's me who failed to hold on to her.
To me, I find that at least she can still confide in you, you should be happy. At least she is still willing to chat with you and share her happy moments with you. I know the feeling is painful having to listen to her happy moments with her bf. But please stand by her and just be her friend. At least try to be just her friend. If there are times when you cannot control your emotions, just let go for a while and give yourself a break without contacting her. She will appreciate you. Love cannot be force. If she loves you, she will love you. If she doesn't, no matter how hard you try, she will just be grateful to you.
Grateful is definitely not love.
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To darrendon,
I have to admit that the feelings that I have may be similiar to those that you have for the girl you have mentioned..but the situation between us may slightly differ in ways where I might have been more fortunate than you in that I was at least her bf (or so I thought) for a short period of time. However, I find that it is more unbearable because everything seem to happen so suddenly when nothing seems to be wrong..and I lost her just like that..I have tried to be the best bf she could've ever asked for...but I guess we were just not meant to be..
When we were together..she told me that her bf does not really treat her really well...and I told her that I promised with all my heart that I would shower her with all the affection that my heart could muster..and I did just that (I hope...) She was really happy then..I was too in seventh heaven..but somehow...somethings just happen when they are meant to...
The past few days have been really busy for me..work..studies..I was really immersed in all the workload but there are always times in between when my thoughts turn to her..I told myself that I should really try to forget the feelings for her...but I know deep in my heart that I still could not let go of her...I know that when you love someone..you should learn to let them go when the times come..I tried...I did tried my very best..but it just didn't work..it was as if I was just lying to myself that I do not care about her anymore..but I do care for her...
The nights that I spend hugging her close and telling her that everything's going to be alright when she's not feeling happy..the way I felt when she held on to my arm..during those moments..I wished with all my heart that Time would stopped forever there and then..all this images of her keep coming back to me again and again..I could swear to the heavens above that no one could have loved her the way I love her right now...and I really do love her..
Sometimes when I felt that I have finally got rid of her from my mind..thoughts of her then come back as strongly as before..and in the end I really do not know what I should do..I know that there's no way for us to be together..since Love can never be forced on to someone..Maybe that's what making it so unberable..like you said I am sure you understand how it feels to love some so much...that nothing else matters in the world except for her...
She used to tell me that I am much more luckier than others in terms of studying abroad and other stuffs...and that people would have wished for all the things that I possess...but I wanted to let her know that I would have given up everything in this world...everything that other people wished for..if I could just be with her again...none of the things would matter to me...You might think it's very immatured of me to think that way...but that's how I feel right now...*sighs* I have been in relationships before..but I have only felt this way twice...the first was my first love...and now her...I can't help it but my heart just cries out for her day and night...
I do not want to lie to myself anymore...I am so tired of telling myself that I do not care for her anymore when I do indeed...I just love her so much it hurts...*sighs*
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Some people say the worst way to miss someone is when they are right next to you and you know you can't have them, but it's worse when you thought you didn't want them anymore and then all of a sudden you realize you can't live without them... -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
Very true... Agreed... If you have not experience happiness, how do u know when you are sad.
P.S: Well, at least you had your beautiful moments with the lady you loved alot, but do not have the fortune to be with her - there are lots of people out there who [b]don't even have half of your luck. If you had a choice - would you rather to undergo a beautiful dream and learn about the bitter truth, or never to experience anything and continue life as normal, like a calm wave?
Cheers [/b]