I need help

• <sk>

  5 Feb 04, 13:04

  Actually you are interacting with people now! And sharing your problems with us... =P
  
  Cheers! xoxo
  
• men_@_arms

  5 Feb 04, 14:39

  Thanks devil. I'm 19.
• Gedanken

  5 Feb 04, 15:00

  men_@_arms, that internet checklist that you used is only a very loose guideline. It is part of a system called differential diagnosis, which only reaches a conclusion once all other factors, such as your environment and circumstances, have been considered.
  
  The results indicate the possibility of bipolar disorder, but right now they are FAR from conclusive. I'm not saying that you don't have a clinical problem here - you may well have one - but it's too early to reach any conclusions.
  
  Anyway, I'm a qualified psychologist but your kind of issue isn't my specific field. However, I might be able to point you in the right direction if you require professional help. PM me and we'll take it from there.
• tranquil2

  5 Feb 04, 16:28

  well, there's ups and downs in life. Dont stress yourself up mentally unnecessaryily. Have an open-mind and don't let your emotions rule over you.
  
  Emotions are not logical and logic is not emotional.
• Devil1976

  5 Feb 04, 17:03

  Originally posted by Gedanken:

  men_@_arms, that internet checklist that you used is only a very loose guideline. It is part of a system called differential diagnosis, which only reaches a conclusion once all other factors, such as your environment and circumstances, have been considered.
  
  The results indicate the possibility of bipolar disorder, but right now they are FAR from conclusive. I'm not saying that you don't have a clinical problem here - you may well have one - but it's too early to reach any conclusions.
  
  Anyway, I'm a qualified psychologist but your kind of issue isn't my specific field. However, I might be able to point you in the right direction if you require professional help. PM me and we'll take it from there.

  Thanks.
• Devil1976

  5 Feb 04, 17:08

  Originally posted by men_@_arms:

  Thanks devil. I'm 19.

  Don't mention it. I know how it's like feeling that it's like the whole world's crushing on you. But remember. You don't have to be a monster. Especially when you don't wish to be one. You don't have to let others determine who you would become if you know it's gonna sucks.
• Tim^Guitarist

  5 Feb 04, 21:01

  Frankly...I dont see what the big deal is...So what if u're alone?
  I'm not really close with my family(or with anyone for that matter),mom's busy workin' and dad's in China.Basically i come home from school everyday and lock myself up in the room for like ages...
  I dont open up much,i dont share...
  When desperately need to let out all the rage in me, i turn to my guitar...Music if u will...
  So what if those asses treat u like a freak,u dont need those
  sh!tbags...
  Be happy with yourself...No one said life was easy...
  I wake up every morning and wish i'd never been born...
  Just pray that something would fall from the sky and bring us all "sweet relief".
  PRIDE and DIGNITY is all a man has...RESPECT yourself and NEVER beg anyone for favours. Then you'll be respected, and respected you will feel HAPPY
  
  Tim^
• Gedanken

  6 Feb 04, 01:22

  It's good to see that many forum members here have the heart to offer their perspectives on the situation to try and help - it helps restore my faith in human nature. However, there are a couple of things that we need to consider here.
  
  First, the presenting problem, i.e. what the person says is the problem at the start, if often not the real issue. It could simply be a manifestation of the real problem. Time and care therefore need to be taken to determine what the nature of the problem is. If we try to get right to solutions at the start, we may inadvertently interrupt and cut short the process of identifying the problem.
  
  I know it sounds like a whole lot of wanky piffle, but it really is the case.
  
  Second, from my limited experience in dealing with depression and its variants, the first thing I learned the hard way is that sometimes there is no such thing as why. I've learned to stop asking, "Why are you depressed?" - if there is a reason, it will come out eventually. Instead, I focus upon the person's experience at that point of time, and just create an environment in which they can talk about how they are feeling, letting them clarify the specifics of the situation.
  
  Again, it sounds like a wank, but that's generally how it's done. That's exactly why I decided not to become a clinical psychologist and go over to the dark side instead - organisational psychology!
• whyleh?

  6 Feb 04, 04:21

  The problem ? YOU .
  Seems like you're pretty much a self-centered, selfish brat who only cares about yourself.
  
  All you care about is "ME, ME, ME !"
  
  Your anger and frustration comes about because you do not get what you want, or has no idea how to get it.
  
  The biggest problem in the world is always your own problem.
  
  Being nasty is not going to make things better. So start using your brain that your parents gave you.
• the_don

  6 Feb 04, 06:59

  take care...
• Devil1976

  6 Feb 04, 12:28

  Originally posted by Gedanken:

  It's good to see that many forum members here have the heart to offer their perspectives on the situation to try and help - it helps restore my faith in human nature. However, there are a couple of things that we need to consider here.
  
  First, the presenting problem, i.e. what the person says is the problem at the start, if often not the real issue. It could simply be a manifestation of the real problem. Time and care therefore need to be taken to determine what the nature of the problem is. If we try to get right to solutions at the start, we may inadvertently interrupt and cut short the process of identifying the problem.
  
  I know it sounds like a whole lot of wanky piffle, but it really is the case.
  
  Second, from my limited experience in dealing with depression and its variants, the first thing I learned the hard way is that sometimes there is no such thing as why. I've learned to stop asking, "Why are you depressed?" - if there is a reason, it will come out eventually. Instead, I focus upon the person's experience at that point of time, and just create an environment in which they can talk about how they are feeling, letting them clarify the specifics of the situation.
  
  Again, it sounds like a wank, but that's generally how it's done. That's exactly why I decided not to become a clinical psychologist and go over to the dark side instead - organisational psychology!

  
• Devil1976

  6 Feb 04, 12:31

  Originally posted by whyleh?:

  The problem ? YOU .
  Seems like you're pretty much a self-centered, selfish brat who only cares about yourself.
  
  All you care about is "ME, ME, ME !"
  
  Your anger and frustration comes about because you do not get what you want, or has no idea how to get it.
  
  The biggest problem in the world is always your own problem.
  
  Being nasty is not going to make things better. So start using your brain that your parents gave you.

  Nope. I don't quite agree with this. It's EASY just to blame things on him, just like saying him easily blame things on others...
  
  In MOST situations if not all, it's MOST UNLIKELY that a person would be solely the blame and clause of things....
• whyleh?

  6 Feb 04, 23:34

  Blaming the fault on someone else is always the easiest way out. Bear in mind that YOU can control YOUR own behavior. Your behavior affects the way others treat you.
  Nastiness begets nastiness.
  
  Your life is what you make of it.
  
  There are people who WAITS for good things to happen.
  There are those who MAKES good things happen. Which one are you ?
  
  
• Gedanken

  6 Feb 04, 23:37

  You sound frustrated - any reason why?
• RainbowPrincess

  7 Feb 04, 05:20

  Men @ arms,
  
  U can tok to the pple here, they're nice folkz...
  
  Ev. body has problems, it depends on the mindset. I remember a boss, who wld scream @ somethg I'd worked damn hard on, slam files on the table, slam tables, etc. Thgs weren't going well @ all, even tho I was a newbie. There were backstabbing colleagues.
  
  My r'ship wasn't doing well either, I almost got married to a guy who, I realised, din really love me. He din stand up for me @ all & only thot of himself. Whenever thgs happened, he'd always twist it such tt it was my fault, & made himself out to be wronged or a victim. He'd always ask me, "So wat I've done is Not enuff?" Well, it damn well wasn't. I dowan the extras, only the basics. So we split.
  
  Thgs were horrible @ home. When I split up wif my ex, my parents were giving me hell, cosh I din tell them the exact details of wat happened, & I'm Not gonna start now.
  
  So wat did I do? Did I take my life? I'm still here, am I Not?
  
  Well, I took a vacation, sorted out my priorities, tokked to frens & resolved to move on. Life became so much better wif time. Managed to win my colleagues over, dev'd a rapport wif my boss, who turned out to be q. alrite. I enjoyed being single & went out wif my girl frens or my guy frens.
  
  Then, I fell in love wif my best fren & we're happily together now.
  
  This is so cheong hey, but I think u need help. Tok to pple who care, even ur parents. They love u more than u think. Sort out ur priorities. U can continue to wallow in self-pity, or resolve to make thgs better.
  
  I can't guarantee ur life will take a turn for the +ve immediately, or tt it'll work out completely. But it sure helps to adopt an optimistic view of life. Do u wanna continue remaining a victim of circumstance? Or do u wanna juz keep on fighting?
  
  I'm a girl, & if I can do it, surely u, a guy, can : )
  
  RP
  
  

  Originally posted by men_@_arms:

  I just came back from school overly early. Couldn't go on with the day. I am very angry and bitter. I walked in class late and my form teacher asked why i was late, i said i had a bad stomachahe, which was a lie, i want to make things sound as normal as possible. Then he said i may have to go for detention class, i flipped out and replied to him "do what you like with me". He got pissed, called me outside and reprimanded me, i was genuinely sorry for being rude, but i doubt he accepted it, but that's not why I am bitter.
  
  I was already pissed about lots of things, as someone said to me on one rare occasion i am spoken to, I let my problems be shackles into the next day. I dont even want to think about how long my shackles are, they are most likely damn long, 5 years of... unhappiness, with touches of happiness in between that have eroded over time. I hesitate to talk to my father because he is at work, same with my mother. My classmates already think of me enough of a freak, why bother talking to them, there is no point. I just left school, cant carry on for today.
  
  I look at my life and feel bloody ashamed, I have suffered and have loss interest in going on. I am tired of working, I am tired of being alone and I am tired of being to blame, I am tired of being me. I really am. The only help i think i can do for myself is to end my life.
  

• jell_o

  8 Feb 04, 03:38

  well, i guess each of us has got our own problems.
  anyway, you said that you are fat and ugly (and that's one of the reason why ur classmates refuse to interact with you). well, there are lots of fat ppl who have lots of friends and all..i think ur problem is that you have those sudden "surge" or change in emotions and it causes you to treat ur classmates differenly everday. so it's like one day a smile and the next day, you gave them cold shoulder. ur "hard to predict" character kinda frightens ur classmates away..
  
  i don know ,,maybe they find you intimidating..
  
  
• Ole

  8 Feb 04, 13:25

  Maybe getting a hobby would be good, a good healthy hobby that u really like. Like me, sometime when i am unhappy i would go to the library and find some fantasy books and escape into their worlds, or i would go and paint, which i find very mediative.
  
  The important thing is not too brood so much over things you can't control. Take things in your stride as it comes.
  
  As for why people don't like to come into contact with you, well if you are not able to behave decently of course no one will want to.
  Take a look from their viewpoint, they also have their own problems, and you behave badly, of course they want to avoid you. Would you want to be around such a person.
  
  I always hold this line in mind whenever i feel like taking out my frustration on others
  Do unto others only what you want others to do to you.
  Cheer up, no one owns you anything but yourself. No one has a responsiblilty to cheer you up. Don't even think about suicide, it is only a coward way out and depending on your belief, how sure are you that suicide is a good way to escape, maybe there is an afterlife, and life there is worse than it is here then it will be out of the frying pan into the fire.
• chaar123

  10 Feb 04, 11:00

  haha u go tell katsumoto suicide is cowardly den he hantum u ah!