Should i end the frenship?
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Hi all, this is my first time posting in this forum. I need help from those out there who are experiencing the same prob with me either now or b4 or anyone who can help me.
I have been liking this guy for 7 years. At first it's jus a crush but as days grew by, i love him more n more. In order for me to control my feelings for him, i ask him to b my god bro but it doesn't seems to be helping. I sacrificed a lot for him, when he got prob, i'll be by his side to console him even if i'm very tired. I'm always willing to do whatever he ask me to do. But recently i found out that he likes a girl n i'm very sad. I know it's no use being sad cos he had told me that he only treat me as a sis. That's why i have the urge to end this frenship bcos i noe that i won't be able to face him if he really go into a relationship with other girls n it will be easier for me to forget him too. If we continue to be frens i won't be able to 4get him. It's hard for me to put up a brave self infront of him when i'm actually bleeding inside. What should i do? Does anyone encourage me to end the frenship or any beeter solutions?
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haiz ... dont brood over it .. there is many good trees out there
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Ya i noe " bu yao wei yi ke shu fang qi zhe ge sen lin" but i never own a forest, in my eyes there's only one tree.
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IF i WERE you.. after, confessing to him and he tells me he only treats me like sis.. then i think i will still continue the friendship........coz im that kind, i can still treat everything like normal.. although i might still continue tolike him.. but its okay.. and he cant stop me from liking him........unless he feels awkward.. then for his own good,i might stop seeing him lor.....
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if u can treat him as fren then u continue this frenship lor.. if not.. forget it.. a clean cut is the best way to forget him... thats what happened to me and my ex......but if u have another 7 yrs to waste then u continue to wait for him lor... cheer up lor
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I tot i can cont to be his fren too but it's jus so hard. If i noe he doesn't have a girl he likes mayb i can cont but now i noe he has one, i jus feel so sad.
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simple. just tell him.
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My fren who noe abt this matter ask me to tell him but what's the use? He already told me that he treats me as a sis. I don't think i will ever made known my feelings for him....sigh i'm really a fool.
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if u find that its harder to continue to be with his frd then to not meet or hear from him...then cut the relationship off is the best method.Originally posted by Foolish Gal:I tot i can cont to be his fren too but it's jus so hard. If i noe he doesn't have a girl he likes mayb i can cont but now i noe he has one, i jus feel so sad. -
If i cut off all ties with him, shld i cut off my frenship with his frens too cos i noe his close fren too. I wanted to end but don't noe what's the best way. any suggestions?
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ya cut cut cut all lah... unless u like his frens too lor.... coz everything that is link to him will make u think of him lor.... e.g.. when i take bus pass those place that mi and my ex always visit last time.. i will think of her and all the happy time.. but then...i realised she is no longer with mi.. sighz..Originally posted by Foolish Gal:If i cut off all ties with him, shld i cut off my frenship with his frens too cos i noe his close fren too. I wanted to end but don't noe what's the best way. any suggestions? -
Ok thanks for the advices that you all had given me. I hope i can put them into practice.
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Well, I am not sure, but have you honestly told him about your feelings for him? As in, actually say 'I like you or love you...'? Or did you just hint to him, that you like him? If its the latter, then you should try confessing to him your feelings and how much you love him. If he says no, take some time off from spending too much time with him until you feel that you have moved on. As for his frens, are'nt they your friends as well?Originally posted by Foolish Gal:Hi all, this is my first time posting in this forum. I need help from those out there who are experiencing the same prob with me either now or b4 or anyone who can help me.
I have been liking this guy for 7 years. At first it's jus a crush but as days grew by, i love him more n more. In order for me to control my feelings for him, i ask him to b my god bro but it doesn't seems to be helping. I sacrificed a lot for him, when he got prob, i'll be by his side to console him even if i'm very tired. I'm always willing to do whatever he ask me to do. But recently i found out that he likes a girl n i'm very sad. I know it's no use being sad cos he had told me that he only treat me as a sis. That's why i have the urge to end this frenship bcos i noe that i won't be able to face him if he really go into a relationship with other girls n it will be easier for me to forget him too. If we continue to be frens i won't be able to 4get him. It's hard for me to put up a brave self infront of him when i'm actually bleeding inside. What should i do? Does anyone encourage me to end the frenship or any beeter solutions?
There's another evil way, which I doubt you should take but I will mention it to you, that is to go after his close fren... WARNING this tactic seldom works, but most of the time hurts you and the close fren.
Other than that, once you have moved on, you can see him as a good friend and nothing more than that... -
I don understand, why not fight for for a relationship?? the way I look at it ,,, ... if u don go with him, confirm u have to leave him (no such thing as a platonic relationship) .. but if you try to make him love you , at least u stand a chance in being with him ... maybe for life even .......Originally posted by Foolish Gal:If i cut off all ties with him, shld i cut off my frenship with his frens too cos i noe his close fren too. I wanted to end but don't noe what's the best way. any suggestions?
Cus either way.. worst case senario is the same ! -
You think of her and all the happy timesOriginally posted by I-like-flings(m):ya cut cut cut all lah... unless u like his frens too lor.... coz everything that is link to him will make u think of him lor.... e.g.. when i take bus pass those place that mi and my ex always visit last time.. i will think of her and all the happy times.. but then...i realised she is no longer with mi.. sighz..
Well, life is short, we can only fill up with as many good memories as we can... so that when we're old, we can look back on all the happy times. Sure you may not be with the gal anymore, but you should be happy that your path crossed for that moment! You can rejoice having met many walks of people who bring laughter and joy to your life as you do for them! -
mayb i can't accept "no" for an ans. I already noe the ans why ask him? If he likes me, he wld have like me during these past 7 years but he rather choose other girls than me. Isn't it obvious that he don't like me? Why make myself disappointed
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ouch. another dilemma.
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Either way girl, you are going to be disappointed......... at least u try ... the thing is ... u cannot go away in life with out asking .. otherwise at 40, u will be asking yourself, "why I did not try" ... if you have tried, atleast u know that hey .. I did something and it did not workout.... this is still better than FOREVER having that "question mark' in your life !Originally posted by Foolish Gal:mayb i can't accept "no" for an ans. I already noe the ans why ask him? If he likes me, he wld have like me during these past 7 years but he rather choose other girls than me. Isn't it obvious that he don't like me? Why make myself disappointed
7 years,.... you two should hev known each other pretty well liao..... what makes u think u stand no chance against some other girl whom he just probably know? .... Mayb he feels just like you just tat becus you tread him like a brother, he treats you like a sis !!! u wan no disappointment, so does he. -
Cause only once you have really known the answer, will your heart be able to move on! Trust me, you will always ponder to yourself whether if you had confessed your feelings to him, would he have said yes? Sure, the chances might be slim, but do you really know for sure? Maybe, he is contemplating on asking you but you always treat him like a bro, so thats why he never asked you or told you his feelings for you?Originally posted by Foolish Gal:mayb i can't accept "no" for an ans. I already noe the ans why ask him? If he likes me, he wld have like me during these past 7 years but he rather choose other girls than me. Isn't it obvious that he don't like me? Why make myself disappointed -
sigh.......he jus told me to help him look for a gift to give to the girl he likes. Shld i help him?
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He told me his criteria of his dream girl once n i don't fit into that criteria at all. He also told me that we will always be fren and we can only remain frens during a chat last time. BTW, i'm not pretty n i feel that he not only goes for character but looks too. Although i'm not that ugly but compared to his other Girl frens, i'm not up to their standards.
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Love is blind. If you confess to him, your heart will be broken and it will be easier for you to move on!Originally posted by Foolish Gal:He told me his criteria of his dream girl once n i don't fit into that criteria at all. He also told me that we will always be fren and we can only remain frens during a chat last time. BTW, i'm not pretty n i feel that he not only goes for character but looks too. Although i'm not that ugly but compared to his other Girl frens, i'm not up to their standards. -
some guys r juz not worth it...
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I think my pride is preventing me from confessing to him.....
If he don't like me, it will be very awkward for me to face him n his fren next time -
jz remain as frens lor... but move on...