Incest???
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triple post
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heh i used to like one of my cousins(6 years older
) a few years back..but heck..it wears off lar..like crushes..i'm 15 this year btw 
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well as long no sexual activities occur btw both of us, it wont be considered as incest..but still, u two shld sit down and think of a solution to ur worries...
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sgFish: I'm too old to have a crush liao.....Don't think there will ever be sex involved....but the tradition thinking will be that as long as you have the same bloodline, you can't be together...regardless of what you have done.....we couldn't come think of a solution if not i won't be wasting any of your precious time here...i really do wish to get some advice here to solving the problem....thanks to you guys so much....
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relationship and no sex a bit..weird leh..Originally posted by goblin80:sgFish: I'm too old to have a crush liao.....Don't think there will ever be sex involved....but the tradition thinking will be that as long as you have the same bloodline, you can't be together...regardless of what you have done.....we couldn't come think of a solution if not i won't be wasting any of your precious time here...i really do wish to get some advice here to solving the problem....thanks to you guys so much....
but people nowadays still very conservative..not sure if your family, friends etc will accept or not
but as they say..love conquers all.. -
Originally posted by goblin80:Got a question for u people out there....can someone advise me on what is incest?? Does loving someone who is your cousin(father side) consider incest??? Just falling in love and not doing anything sexually....can someone please advise me....I have fallen in love with my cousin.....
My advice, don't begin.
To some degree, we can control the kind of partner we want to be with - but once we are inside, it would be difficult to control love and emotions.
Cheers -
althought we cannot decide who to fall in live with, but we can control our own happiness - lyrics from a chinese song
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I do understand that we can control our own happiness but we can never control our feelings towards someone.....I believe that sex is not a MUST in a relationship...just wanna follow my heart....
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Originally posted by goblin80:If only we can avoid seeing each other.....rather impossible not to see each other.....everyone in the whole family knows that we r on very very good terms....so if she didn't come over for some time, they will keep asking me where is she, etc etc.....
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you seem to be very determined.
if you really feel that both of you will overcome all obstacles and gossips together, have a serious talk with your parents, see if they will give you their blessings (which i dun think so).
that is the very first step if you want to fight for this r/s.
my advice is like many others here, dun start. the obtacles are too many and will burn you two down in the long run.
the ultimate decision is yours. hope the better one happens for you. -
yeah, sex is not crucial for a relationship.Originally posted by goblin80:I do understand that we can control our own happiness but we can never control our feelings towards someone.....I believe that sex is not a MUST in a relationship...just wanna follow my heart....
but humans have emotions & lust & certain needs......if someday it happens to the two of you, then......... -
indeed sex is not congruent to marriage, and The good book opposes to incest which requires sex and not just marriage. but even monks struggle with lust. pregnancy is easier to control than lust. your grandparents and maybe even parents will insist that you carry down the family name, if you are chinese male. how you solve that problem?Originally posted by goblin80:I do understand that we can control our own happiness but we can never control our feelings towards someone.....I believe that sex is not a MUST in a relationship...just wanna follow my heart.... -
Ur dad's bro's daughter .. meaning that both of u have the same surname.. i tink it's against chinese culture to have 2 who's related by blood n having the same surname to get marry .. that's wat my dad told mi when i was young ... i dunno whether it's against the law ...Originally posted by goblin80:She's my dad's brother's daughter....we are not dating....
this is wat i get from the net ...
for more of it plz go .. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incest
(i didn't paste all of it ..)
Incest
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.
The neutrality of this article is disputed.
Incest is sexual activity between close family members. It is a taboo in most societies and a criminal offence and an impediment to marriage in most countries, as well as being opposed by most modern religions. But the exact definition of what is a "close family member" varies widely: some jurisdictions consider only those related by birth, others also those related by adoption or marriage; some prohibit relations only with nuclear family members and ancestors or descendants, while others prohibit relations with aunts and uncles, nephews and nieces, and cousins as well.
Anthropologists have found that all societies place restrictions on who one may marry. Although marriage should not be confused with sex, many societies only permit sexual relations within the bounds of marriage--hence, their rules regarding marriage are the same as their rules regarding sex. And in other societies, where sexual relations are permitted outside marriage, persons prohibited to marry are most often (but not always) also prohibited to have sex. Sociology generalizes these marriage restrictions with the terms endogamy -- the group within which one must marry -- and exogamy -- the group one must not marry
i dont encourage u to have babies with ur cousin cause i have heard of a couple almost like urs (they are cousin, but their surnames are different), they have 4 child (now adults) .. 3 of them are blind .. the remaining n youngest one has become a doctor .. the parents have lead a hard life to bring up the 4 child ... realli feel sad when i heard of these things when they could be prevent .. juz hope that u will think twice be4 having children ...
Marriage n love between cousin is another issue ..so i also dunno whether it's right or wrong... should u do it or should u not do it .. but then be prepared to face very strong opposition from ur relatives since both of u have the same surname ...
hope that i have help u in ur decsions .. -
this is too serious a topic to be discussed here...
you would probably wish to find some professional counsellors or what for help...
but my view is that, it is right to fall in love with any individuals, but it is not socially-accepted to be together with someone who is your close relative. It's not impossible, just rather difficult...
All The BEST~!! -
well i've always believed in the idea of love transcending all boundaries. i assume that you;ve thought this thru and u really love your cousin in a romantic way.
well. seems that she recipocrates the feelings, but can i ask u. is there any real need of taking the next step? i.e becomin an exclusive couple?
i guess this is a real sensitive issue and i advise you to thread lightly as its really really thin ice you're threadin on. play safe. just stick to what you both have now. if things really develop to that stage whereby you're willing to give your all to your cousin, then be open about. ask your parents. seek their help or approval or whatever. u never know what might just happen. but atleast do it with a clear consience. cause even if you go sneaking around its just gonna come out one day and it'll turn out even worse. furthermore, sneaking around isn't very healthy for a romantic r'ship cause it tends to send off wrong vibes sometimes -
so as long as you don't have kids, it's okay.Originally posted by dumbdumb!:eh... first u must know why incest is wrong lor...
its due to the dna thingy where like if ur dna damaged, then if someone with the same blood type will suffer the same defect.. then if u 2 screw screw, the kid will get screwed up.
i think father side cannot rite -
what about legal marriage at the ROM?Originally posted by AzRaeL:so as long as you don't have kids, it's okay. -
It is not an incest in law as they do not belong to the same nuclear family. So legally they can still get married.
However it is frowned on by the Chinese culture and Medical science. This is because it will not allowed the damaged DNA to be repaired.
But anyway, some Indians families do marry within the family