We have been in a relationship togeather for one year now. she has visited me here once and I have gone to japan twice to see her.Originally posted by ^sylvia^:hard to understand her without proper communications..
im sure you know about this right?
well, body language lor![]()
believe in your faith big kor kor.Originally posted by Aargon:We have been in a relationship togeather for one year now. she has visited me here once and I have gone to japan twice to see her.
shes planning to come here in six months time for another visit but I am wondering whether this relationship is doomed because of both the cultural differences and the distance problem. She wants to quit her job to come here to be with me but I think that represents such a big commitment and I'm not ready for her to do that....
When are together we are inseparatable but when distance becomes a barrier i start having doubts again.....
And, communication is impt but not most impt thing in your case, its the faith and trust!Originally posted by Aargon:I know that communication is the most important thing in a relationship and it worries me that this thing we have going isnt going to make it.
Anyones thoughts and opinions welcomed.
well spoken.. wooo hoooo~Originally posted by shifeng:ya.. learn some japanese... go for some lessons, will be much better if u know how to speak, can impress her parents.. well, when it comes to true love, distance doesnt matter... cos the hearts are close enuff..
Yeah i meet her parents when i was last in japan. They couldnt speak a word of english so she was like a translator. They were really nice to my surprise....Originally posted by shifeng:ya.. learn some japanese... go for some lessons, will be much better if u know how to speak, can impress her parents.. well, when it comes to true love, distance doesnt matter... cos the hearts are close enuff..
well, shes doing all those things becos of wat? think abt it.. only u shd know whats her attitude towards u... love is a v strong things, it if u are deeply in love with some1, u wouldnt mind giving up anything for it (of course mayb not every1 think this way)..Originally posted by Aargon:Yeah i meet her parents when i was last in japan. They couldnt speak a word of english so she was like a translator. They were really nice to my surprise....
The worry is also that i am not sure if I love her... I mean we really dont even know each other very well yet shes prepared to quit her job to come here? its such a big commitment to make and I will feel repsonsible for her.... I just dont know her well enough to want her to do this.
I dont believe in love at first sight and think that true love has to grow and develop. If it all goes wrong then what happens?? she is 24 and i am nearly 30 and i think she has long term plans ie marriage but i'm not ready to consider than yet although i realise that my time clock is ticking.
I know with japanese girls that they want to marry by the time they are 25 so that is also playing on my mind.... ie is it love or convenience?
big kor kor, you wouldn't post this and seek for help if you don't love her..Originally posted by Aargon:Yeah i meet her parents when i was last in japan. They couldnt speak a word of english so she was like a translator. They were really nice to my surprise....
The worry is also that i am not sure if I love her... I mean we really dont even know each other very well yet shes prepared to quit her job to come here? its such a big commitment to make and I will feel repsonsible for her.... I just dont know her well enough to want her to do this.
I dont believe in love at first sight and think that true love has to grow and develop. If it all goes wrong then what happens?? she is 24 and i am nearly 30 and i think she has long term plans ie marriage but i'm not ready to consider than yet although i realise that my time clock is ticking.
I know with japanese girls that they want to marry by the time they are 25 so that is also playing on my mind....
wow.. sooo romantic.. for me i wish to wear my bridegown and sit on a beautiful cool bike with my groom riding me and some bikes escorting! heeee!!Originally posted by shifeng:my dream is to marry my love 1 on a cruise... hehe![]()
she love me? thats what i dont understand.Originally posted by shifeng:well, shes doing all those things becos of wat? think abt it.. only u shd know whats her attitude towards u... love is a v strong things, it if u are deeply in love with some1, u wouldnt mind giving up anything for it (of course mayb not every1 think this way)..
what she had done for u, shows that she loves u very much and wants to be with u... u shd feel fortunate to have such lady doing tat for u... of course if u love some1, u would like to spend more time with him/her... but like what i said, her attitude towards u, only u can feel it... we cant.. if u feel that she is very sincere towards u... go ahead.. time and tide wait for no man.. u are 30 already, shd know that time pass v quick, just a blink of the eyes, 10 years gone...
oh... 5 weeks ah.. well thats kind of little, perhaps she feels its little too, and thats why shes coming over to spend more time with u?Originally posted by Aargon:she love me? thats what i dont understand.
We have been in this relationship for just under a year now and during this time, we have actually only been togeather in total 5 weeks.
How can you be in love with someone from only being with them for a total of 5 weeks? I'm worried its not really love but more a fixation
with me.
I have to admit when we are together she shows nothing by total attention to me. she asked me to stay at her house when i was visiting her in japan (i declined because I hadnt met her parents and it was just too uncomfortable), and she has introduced me to all her friends and shown photos to them of me. When I am with her I do feel very comfortable and complete.... I'm just scared we havent been through enough to even consider her coming here to live.
She has asked me what I planned to get married. I said not for another 2 years and she said the same for her too. BUT, by quitting her job and coming here that's practically married already... and plus I know that she will miss japan because she was actually home sick when she visited me here....
hehe... ya its my dream.. then night time can view the stars with my love 1... cos i really love the galaxies... well, but its a dream mayb.. lolOriginally posted by ^sylvia^:wow.. sooo romantic.. for me i wish to wear my bridegown and sit on a beautiful cool bike with my groom riding me and some bikes escorting! heeee!!![]()
yeah.. i agree.. and you may go to jap with her when she miss home right?Originally posted by shifeng:oh... 5 weeks ah.. well thats kind of little, perhaps she feels its little too, and thats why shes coming over to spend more time with u?
shes so sweet... perhaps when she came over, u can spend more time with her... but as wat u said she will miss japan, so mayb u shd do something in return for her? like mayb 6 months in singapore, 6 months in japan? of course travelling expenses will be high though...
if there is some1 doing such a sweet things to me.. i will appreciate her and cherish her very greatly.. nvr let her go...![]()
thanks.. i do hope your will come true too..Originally posted by shifeng:hehe... ya its my dream.. then night time can view the stars with my love 1... cos i really love the galaxies... well, but its a dream mayb.. lol
hope ur dream of ur groom riding bike with u comes true..![]()
ya.. and it will be an unforgettable night... tats wat i gona do...Originally posted by ^sylvia^:thanks.. i do hope your will come true too..
we will ride till night.. to somewhere gazing stars..
till latenight.. and keep the memories deep in our heart.. isn't that good?
wahahaha we are getting outta topic.. heeOriginally posted by shifeng:ya.. and it will be an unforgettable night... tats wat i gona do...
we are sensitive but we don't give our hearts away easily, she give her heart to you because she thinks your the man she loves only!Originally posted by Aargon:I cant just do six months here, six months there.. i have a job and career here to think about.
Yes, think i am insecure and scared of commitment. I have a girl who is pretty, smart and willing to give up her job in Japan to come over here to live with me..... I just find it hard that a girl would do all this for me.
And plus, Japanese culture is very different from chinese culture.
And the reason I dont learn japanese is because I am trying to learn mandarin and more about my own chinese history ( I was born and breed in Australia).
I think women give their hearts away too easily, that is why they are the ones often hurt in a relationship when it goes wrong.
thanks for your thoughts sylvia and ShifengOriginally posted by ^sylvia^:we are sensitive but we don't give our hearts away easily, she give her heart to you because she thinks your the man she loves only!
you can try to learn more about jap rather chinese first ya?
do something for your love ones rather than your knowledge lor..
very jia lat lei you.. bth..~ love her more and understand her more bah big kor kor. im so much younger than you wor.