why do women get jealous easily??
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oh well, i admit i'm the kind who gets jealous over small things at times...
Take this situation: one of my close friends msg my bf and chat with him via sms, friendster message, etc.... my friend did tell me tht she chats with him..dunno why, i get quite worked out...i din tell my friend off, instead, actually i 'vent' my frustrations on my bf...
is there something wrong with me? i shd not hv gotten jealous over this matter, right?? i knew tht i shd hv trust both my bf & close friend..juz dunno why, i feel quite annoyed by this matter....
Or are all women jealous creatures? can anyone bring some light to me? -
tt's y i dun use friendster.. no privacyOriginally posted by *genie*:oh well, i admit i'm the kind who gets jealous over small things at times...
Take this situation: one of my close friends msg my bf and chat with him via sms, friendster message, etc.... my friend did tell me tht she chats with him..dunno why, i get quite worked out...i din tell my friend off, instead, actually i 'vent' my frustrations on my bf...
is there something wrong with me? i shd not hv gotten jealous over this matter, right?? i knew tht i shd hv trust both my bf & close friend..juz dunno why, i feel quite annoyed by this matter....
Or are all women jealous creatures? can anyone bring some light to me?
anywayz, i dun tink its ur fault or anything.. human nature.. juz try to get over it 
clear things wif ur bf and fren? c wat they gotta say loh 
if not, im sure u'll b able to find someone better.. 
nonono.. u may think women are jealous creatures.. but men get jealous too
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friendster no privacy meh? unless u are refering to the bulletinOriginally posted by Joyce:tt's y i dun use friendster.. no privacy anywayz, i dun tink its ur fault or anything.. human nature.. juz try to get over it clear things wif ur bf and fren? c wat they gotta say loh if not, im sure u'll b able to find someone better..
nonono.. u may think women are jealous creatures.. but men get jealous too -
oooh.... thin ice..
the person u should be speaking to about this is your friend. but then again, anyhow tok co.ck only is no problem. imagine, at work some of us flirt outrageously with one another and it's just a nice way to pass time becos work is so mundane and stressful. if now u cannot tahan these sexual innuendos that happen between human adults (ok i admit some pple just CANNOT flirt, harmlessly or otherwise) then next time how? working class pple have confidence, flair and in certain cases, are very very attractive. and.. of course u have to talk to each other when u work, male female or alien. if not how?
try to relac, if u're so choking on ur bf u might lose him... -
Originally posted by *genie*:oh well, i admit i'm the kind who gets jealous over small things at times...
Take this situation: one of my close friends msg my bf and chat with him via sms, friendster message, etc.... my friend did tell me tht she chats with him..dunno why, i get quite worked out...i din tell my friend off, instead, actually i 'vent' my frustrations on my bf...
is there something wrong with me? i shd not hv gotten jealous over this matter, right?? i knew tht i shd hv trust both my bf & close friend..juz dunno why, i feel quite annoyed by this matter....
Or are all women jealous creatures? can anyone bring some light to me?
Many people always try to justify their emotional reaction through logical means - end up never to learn anything at all or worst, repeat history over again.
What do I mean?
Jealousy is an emotional poison. Trust me, you could tell one hundred woman about your plight and they will probably stand on your side and feel for you. Because of the fact that 'OTHER' woman came in and disturb your peace with your boyfriend, logically speaking, this is so 'wrong.'
Now I will tell you the other side of the story these woman may not reveal to you - it is your insecurity that triggers this jealousy. You are the kind of lover that sees your bf as a form of possession: Remember how tight and careful you handle your possession (bag, cash, etc) because you are so afraid that you might displace it and lose it forever? Or worst, stolen by someone next door?
You distrust love - therefore love distrust you. You are made to see your love as ambigious, therefore jealousy always claim the empty gaps where trust cannot live on. Love tried to shine - but some part of you remain unconsciously covered.
I always tell people this real life and virtual space: If your bf wants to leave you - he doesn't have to be surrounded by girls to make that happen - HE WILL DO IF THAT IS HIS DESIRE. Understanding this logic you will discover that jealousy is not trigger by your boyfriend - it came from you. You don't trust yourself and your relationship, therefore your anger is vented on someone close to you - your bf.
P.S: Jealousy is one emotion I never remember how it felt - in fact in my memory, I swear it never came to me before. Love is natural, expansive and ever-growing - there should not be a space for jealousy in our hearts when it comes to love.
Cheers -
dunno quarrel lor... talk to him...
personally I'll be also.... not jealous something wrong oso....
unless you pals belong to the same group of common friends then bo bian.... -
Without jealousy, there can be no war.
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Something to add.
Hmmmmmmm....
Nay. I better stop. -
dat the nature of gers.. hw jealous u can get depends hw impt dat person meant to u?Originally posted by *genie*:oh well, i admit i'm the kind who gets jealous over small things at times...
Take this situation: one of my close friends msg my bf and chat with him via sms, friendster message, etc.... my friend did tell me tht she chats with him..dunno why, i get quite worked out...i din tell my friend off, instead, actually i 'vent' my frustrations on my bf...
is there something wrong with me? i shd not hv gotten jealous over this matter, right?? i knew tht i shd hv trust both my bf & close friend..juz dunno why, i feel quite annoyed by this matter....
Or are all women jealous creatures? can anyone bring some light to me?
eg: if he the bf u really luv alot & he is chatting w a ger dat u duno, u might be jealous but vent but after awhile it gone..
but it happen 2 b with ur best fren, u will rem it & be more hurt coz both r the person u trust n luv most.. -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
wow..great analysis... Many people always try to justify their emotional reaction through logical means - end up never to learn anything at all or worst, repeat history over again.
What do I mean?
Jealousy is an emotional poison. Trust me, you could tell one hundred woman about your plight and they will probably stand on your side and feel for you. Because of the fact that 'OTHER' woman came in and disturb your peace with your boyfriend, logically speaking, this is so 'wrong.'
Now I will tell you the other side of the story these woman may not reveal to you - it is your insecurity that triggers this jealousy. You are the kind of lover that sees your bf as a form of possession: Remember how tight and careful you handle your possession (bag, cash, etc) because you are so afraid that you might displace it and lose it forever? Or worst, stolen by someone next door?
[b]You distrust love - therefore love distrust you. You are made to see your love as ambigious, therefore jealousy always claim the empty gaps where trust cannot live on. Love tried to shine - but some part of you remain unconsciously covered.
I always tell people this real life and virtual space: If your bf wants to leave you - he doesn't have to be surrounded by girls to make that happen - HE WILL DO IF THAT IS HIS DESIRE. Understanding this logic you will discover that jealousy is not trigger by your boyfriend - it came from you. You don't trust yourself and your relationship, therefore your anger is vented on someone close to you - your bf.
P.S: Jealousy is one emotion I never remember how it felt - in fact in my memory, I swear it never came to me before. Love is natural, expansive and ever-growing - there should not be a space for jealousy in our hearts when it comes to love.
Cheers [/b]
maybe u're right..i'm not confident of myself & this r/s...well, anyway, i've apologized to my bf liao... in the past, i'm not like tht loh..juz dunno why this time, it really bothers me.... -
Originally posted by Yunhaier: Many people always try to justify their emotional reaction through logical means - end up never to learn anything at all or worst, repeat history over again.
.......
Cheers Great one there. And that is why I always think it's ...... to be jealous. -
........bcos guy no give the ger "an quan gan"
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Originally posted by Yunhaier:
what yunhaier stated above are indeed very true. However, the fact is that....not everyone can readily embrace the fact that love is " Love is natural, expansive and ever-growing - there should not be a space for jealousy in our hearts when it comes to love"....
Jealousy is an emotional poison. Trust me, you could tell one hundred woman about your plight and they will probably stand on your side and feel for you. Because of the fact that 'OTHER' woman came in and disturb your peace with your boyfriend, logically speaking, this is so 'wrong.'
Now I will tell you the other side of the story these woman may not reveal to you - it is your insecurity that triggers this jealousy. You are the kind of lover that sees your bf as a form of possession: Remember how tight and careful you handle your possession (bag, cash, etc) because you are so afraid that you might displace it and lose it forever? Or worst, stolen by someone next door?
[b]You distrust love - therefore love distrust you. You are made to see your love as ambigious, therefore jealousy always claim the empty gaps where trust cannot live on. Love tried to shine - but some part of you remain unconsciously covered.
I always tell people this real life and virtual space: If your bf wants to leave you - he doesn't have to be surrounded by girls to make that happen - HE WILL DO IF THAT IS HIS DESIRE. Understanding this logic you will discover that jealousy is not trigger by your boyfriend - it came from you. You don't trust yourself and your relationship, therefore your anger is vented on someone close to you - your bf.
P.S: Jealousy is one emotion I never remember how it felt - in fact in my memory, I swear it never came to me before. Love is natural, expansive and ever-growing - there should not be a space for jealousy in our hearts when it comes to love.
Cheers [/b]
At the end of the day, leaving the point about how an individual distrust love and therefore allow jealousy to consume him/her in a relationship.....please also remember that jealousy doesn't just spring out of nowhere too. I mean...how many ppl can take it if your other half has been constantly smsing your opp sex friend? Even though it might be true that nothing is going on during their sms chat....but my question here then is - if it bothers you, should you just quietly take it? or rather...even if your other half doesn't know that it bothers you, isn't it only appropriate that your other half stop such a practice? so as to avoid misunderstanding from both end?
I opined that jealousy arises not just from the insecurity within a person...but external factors contribute to it as well. It is true that if your other half wants to leave you, there is no need for a 3rd party to appear before he/she decides to do so. But at the meantime, don't "trivalise" your sense of discomfort and never brush it off as "Oh..i'm just immature or insecure...I'll work around it." Calmly talk it out with your other half how you feel. You may face the risk of being looked upon as immature or insecure...but if your other half really cares for you, he/she will appreciate that you are open about your feelings and is likely to refrain from doing what upsets you...provided that it is not unreasonable. -
PMS maybe?Originally posted by *genie*:juz dunno why this time, it really bothers me.... -
its common for women to get jealous.. but venting it on ur bf its kinda wrg.Originally posted by *genie*:oh well, i admit i'm the kind who gets jealous over small things at times...
Take this situation: one of my close friends msg my bf and chat with him via sms, friendster message, etc.... my friend did tell me tht she chats with him..dunno why, i get quite worked out...i din tell my friend off, instead, actually i 'vent' my frustrations on my bf...
is there something wrong with me? i shd not hv gotten jealous over this matter, right?? i knew tht i shd hv trust both my bf & close friend..juz dunno why, i feel quite annoyed by this matter....
Or are all women jealous creatures? can anyone bring some light to me?
ur bf mayb chatting with her as a fren onli. on top of dat, u muz TRUST ur bf too... u shld haf a gd tok with him rather den venting it on him. wait both flare up and quarrel will arise.. -
Mojority of women are slave of jealousy. What you can do now is
1. Ask your boyfriend to change his hp no. afterward don't give his number to other gals.
2. Keep his number. But, he has to SMS/tell face to face your galfriend do not SMS to him anymore. Your galfriends can always SMS to her own boyfriend and stop bothering other people's biz.
3.If your boyfriend insist he wants communication with them, he is rather not committed to the relationship.
The feeling of boyfriend double timing, for sure get his girlfriend jealous. -
Originally posted by FireIce:........bcos guy no give the ger "an quan gan" Then how to give "an quan gan" in this context? Don't talk to other girls?
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If he is sincere, he will show his galfriend the SMS he had sent to her friends. If he doesn't want to show, he is suspicious.
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hard to explain.. coz if the guy gives u 'an quan gan', even if he flirts with every girl on the earth u oso wun feel stressed/jealous...Originally posted by Parka: Then how to give "an quan gan" in this context? Don't talk to other girls? -
Originally posted by *genie*:wow..great analysis...
maybe u're right..i'm not confident of myself & this r/s...well, anyway, i've apologized to my bf liao... in the past, i'm not like tht loh..juz dunno why this time, it really bothers me.... -
Hi...Originally posted by on tenterhooks:what yunhaier stated above are indeed very true. However, the fact is that....not everyone can readily embrace the fact that love is " Love is natural, expansive and ever-growing - there should not be a space for jealousy in our hearts when it comes to love"....
At the end of the day, leaving the point about how an individual distrust love and therefore allow jealousy to consume him/her in a relationship.....please also remember that jealousy doesn't just spring out of nowhere too. I mean...how many ppl can take it if your other half has been constantly smsing your opp sex friend? Even though it might be true that nothing is going on during their sms chat....but my question here then is - if it bothers you, should you just quietly take it? or rather...even if your other half doesn't know that it bothers you, isn't it only appropriate that your other half stop such a practice? so as to avoid misunderstanding from both end?
I opined that jealousy arises not just from the insecurity within a person...but external factors contribute to it as well. It is true that if your other half wants to leave you, there is no need for a 3rd party to appear before he/she decides to do so. But at the meantime, don't "trivalise" your sense of discomfort and never brush it off as "Oh..i'm just immature or insecure...I'll work around it." Calmly talk it out with your other half how you feel. You may face the risk of being looked upon as immature or insecure...but if your other half really cares for you, he/she will appreciate that you are open about your feelings and is likely to refrain from doing what upsets you...provided that it is not unreasonable.
Actually... It's debatable... -
Agree. I'm sure it depends on the mutual understanding of the gal and guy involved in the situation too.....Originally posted by Devil1976:Hi...
Actually... It's debatable...
All I'm trying to say is this - Dun leave it to chances that something will or will not occur. At the end of the day, you duno what's going on in the mind of the other party, isn't it? Dun test relationship unnecessarily...It's foolish to do so when the couple involved knows jolly well that their relationship is not that strong or stable yet... -
i feel that little signs of u show jelously may well spice up ur love life..
afterall it show`s his place in ur heart..
tt`s if he understands..
anyway let him know u really care for him tt`s why u felt this way..
tell u afraid to lose him..
i tink it will strenghten the relationship..
really -
i think... you are not jealous because of your bf... i think all the while you have been envious abt this fren of yours. So when she gets close to ur bf, u get all tensed up....Originally posted by *genie*:wow..great analysis...
maybe u're right..i'm not confident of myself & this r/s...well, anyway, i've apologized to my bf liao... in the past, i'm not like tht loh..juz dunno why this time, it really bothers me....